


PolySeed One Shots

by Wealthywetsunny



Series: One Shots [5]
Category: Far Cry 5
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Multi, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2021-02-25 20:48:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 57
Words: 127,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21881767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wealthywetsunny/pseuds/Wealthywetsunny
Summary: A mixture of headcanons and one shots from Far Cry 5 involving all four Seeds.Requests are welcome
Relationships: Female Deputy | Judge & Jacob Seed, Female Deputy | Judge & Joseph Seed, Female Deputy | Judge/Faith Seed, Female Deputy | Judge/John Seed
Series: One Shots [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1178501
Comments: 185
Kudos: 308





	1. Kidnapped

The Chosen were a fierce group of fighters. Zipping around in their fast jets that must’ve cost a fortune. Shooting the ground around her until she retreated further and got herself surrounded in a small building with only so many exits.

The Peggie’s screams rang through her head. Made her grit her teeth until her jaw ached with how they told her of what an awful, dirty sinner she was and how ‘this is for The Father.’

She’s taken down hoards of people all on her own. A modern version of an assassin with the way she perfected a one woman army. This was different though. They didn’t seem as hell bent on killing her. They were trying to capture her. She figured this out real quick when she lost her footing running up a steep hill and a bullet imbedded itself into her shoulder. It was laced with bliss. Managed to scrape her skin. But it still got in her bloodstream. Made her see little sparkles that had her calming down despite the circumstances. And it’d be so easy to give in, to just let them take her.

Rook was a fighter. And filled with pride. Too much for a junior deputy that’s for sure. The fact that she saw The Chosen from each of the heralds outside made her tremble. This wasn’t a direct order from one Seed. It was sent from all of them. What the fuck had she done to warrant this treatment? Like she was some five star criminal.

The bliss won out in the end when another bullet went into her leg. Crippled her. Made her drop to the ground in a tangle of her limbs, the limbs that felt so very heavy with that damn drug making its way through her system.

*****

“Ah, she’s waking up. Deputy?”

“God leave her alone John. And don’t pull back her lids like that.”

“Fuck off Jacob, just seeing if she’s alright.”

Rook’s head was pounding a steady rhythm. Making her whine as she curled away from whoever was touching her face. Could she not get some alone time for once? Maybe people getting the hell out of her way before she starts swinging. Not like she’d be able to. The world was still fuzzy when she popped open an eye all on her own. Her tongue felt too thick in her mouth. Like she was chewing on a wad of gum.

“She looks too pale brothers. Sick. The Father won’t like that.”

“If he wanted it done right then he shoulda been there to grab her. He’s not gonna complain, he just wants to see her alive.”

“Hm.” That soft voice reached around to Rook as she squirmed in the sheets that were bundled up around her. She propped herself up on her elbows. Flinching when a small pair of hands reached out to steady her with soothing words. “Easy Deputy.”

“Lay off her Faith, she’s a big girl, aren’t ya pup?”

She made some grunt in the back of her throat that didn’t register at words in the slightest. It seemed to be enough seeing as no one pestered her.

When she was able to take in the scene in front of her she had to hold in a scream. Bit down on her lip hard enough for John to reach forward and coax it free. Remind her to be careful from where he was crouched on the floor, hands gripping the edge of the bed.

“She does look bad.”

She scoffed, so ready to tell John off. Tell him that she thought religious folk weren’t supposed to be so damn judgmental. Didn’t he give some speech in accepting all sorts of people into Eden’s Gate. Rook opened up her mouth, a finger raised in the air to make her point final. Before any words could spill out—and everyone was waiting seeing Jacob’s B-boy stance and Faith’s tipped head—she felt bile raise in her throat. John back peddled, falling on his ass as she tipped herself over the sheets and threw up what she ate for lunch earlier that day.

“Oh god. No, nope. Not dealing with that. You two...just, uh, do something before Joseph gets here.”

John was out of that room in the blink of an eye. Footsteps tapping a fast beat until she heard him go down the stairs. She hoped that she managed to ruin his outfit at least. If not, at least his carpet was screwed.

“I got her Jacob. I’ll make her look presentable.”

“What,” she swung her legs off the side of the bed, frown on her face as she grimaced from the taste in her mouth. “Do I not look good enough? Not cute enough?”

Jacob looked amused from the time she woke up. Still holding that smile. Faith on the other hand seemed to be scrambling for some kind of answer. Sputtering with her words and running her hands through her hair.

With a light nod from Jacob and a mocking salute coming from her, he walked out of the room, calling for John.

“Let's get you into something nice.” She gasped softly, followed up by a giggle not reserved for someone caught in the middle of civil war. “I’d know exactly what The Father would like.”

Rook was brought into a huge bathroom, Faith’s hand on the small of her back. A reminding presence that she was here against her will.

She took a sweeping gaze around the washroom. Saw the intricacies it held. How massive it was. John Seed was loaded. God, why didn’t she take this place for the resistance? Trading in couches and the back seat of cars for silk sheets would make her a savoir.

Faith hopped around the room filling up a tub in the corner of the room and beckoning Rook over as she sat on the rim, dainty legs barely touching the cool tiled floor. “Hop in, I'll get your clothes.” The door was left wide open when Faith scurried out. Modesty was important, but the water had steam floating off it, and there were special hair care products and...were those jets?! Yeah, this would be just fine.

Her clothes were flung off in an instant and she was easing herself in. Arms wrapped around her chest with her head hung down. Hair shielding her from seeing the siren enter the room.

“It’s nice isn’t it?”

Rook jolted, making some water splash over the side.

Faith smiled again before dumping clothes onto the cover of the toilet for when she got out. “Oh I can’t wait, The Father will be so happy to see you. He loves you, you know? He loves all his children.”

She came around to press on Rook’s shoulders, to make her fall back into the water and wet her hair. She was fighting the bliss that was still in her system. Making her less tense as she felt blunt nails scrap her head. Rubbing in suds as she sang softly.

“Faith?”

Rook cringed at John’s voice. Loud and booming in the other room. She could see the smile on his face, hear it in the way he spoke.

“Bathroom.” Rook could slap the girl. In fact, she could grab the hem of that stupid dress and drag her in the water. Christ the bathtub would fit about 4 people anyway.

John sauntered in with a bounce in his step. Not missing a beat upon seeing her naked. He simply smiled. Fucking smiled like all was right in the world. Like this was a routine they did daily.

“The Father’s here you two. I’d hurry it along.” His forearm was braced in the doorframe. Shades dangling on his vest precariously.

Faith had jumped up the moment all the suds were gone. Taking the offered towel that John held out. It was light purple, flowers embezzled on the outside. The young woman held it out expectantly. Eyes shining with warmth. Rook hesitated, gaze going over to John. He wasn’t leaving was he? God this family needed a lesson on boundaries.

“John!”

That was Joseph’s voice. No doubt about it. And he sounded mad.

“I told you to stay downstairs to help Jacob.”

“But the Deputy—“

“I can take care of that. Don’t suffocate the woman.”

She watched his face fall. How he softened before sulking away like a kicked puppy.

Joseph popped his head around the corner just in time for Faith to curl the towel around Rook to see she was taking a brush to her hair as the deputy leaned on the sink. “I see you’ve had quite the welcome party.” He looked exasperated as he said it. Eyes flicking over to where John stood out of view and back to Faith. The only member not hovering around her was Jacob. She didn’t think she’d be able to handle him right now.

“We’ve been treating her just fine Joseph.” John reminded her of a petulant child. She heard his footsteps approach before Joseph held up his hands, presumably to stop him.

“Faith, come with me. John you too, downstairs.”

The door clicked shut behind Faith, leaving her alone with one last look from Joseph. A frown settled deeply on his face. He looked so sorry at the turn of events from his family. As he well should be. She was a grown ass woman who could handle herself, thank you very much.

Rook pet down the rest of her locks. The tangles were all out from Faith’s ministrations. That girl was good for something it seemed.

The clothes that were left were...well, in the nicest way possible without getting an army on her tail for disrespecting the heralds, it was very ‘Eden’s Gate.’ Screamed innocence and purity. Modesty. It was white. Because of course it was. Though she wasn’t looking to be strung up from a bridge in the Henbane so she tossed it over her head and tugged it around her curves.

And what did they expect her to do? Mingle? Wine and dine, act like she was apart of the family. She didn’t have much of a choice, she’d smile, nod and make sure they didn’t drug her and drag her over for confessions.

As soon as she walked out she ran into Jacob’s broad chest. Sputtered and took two steps back, wrestling out of the loose hold he placed on her biceps. “Calm down pup, just doing what I’m told. Taking you down to eat.”

She was sure she pulled some face that showed her confusion. The utter shock that distorted her features. He chuckled gruffly and pushed her ahead of him, no further explanation.

*****

Once they were sat down she was frozen. Limbs stiff as they moved around her to get things set up. At some point John had turned on an old radio in some half assed attempt at making the room more lively. It served to set her on edge. Questioning their motives as he collapsed down in a chair across from her. His hand was curled into a fist resting on his cheek as he tipped his head.

The food was steaming hot. Piled high, the smell of it all made her sigh. When’s the last time she's seen this much food? It’d be nice if she wasn’t sharing the evening with the Seeds. Beggars can’t be choosers.

“Well isn’t this something.” Jacob’s dry tone made her flinch. “We’re all homey huh dep?”

Joseph’s lips tightened, blue eyes looking suddenly regretful.

Rook just shook her head. Fighting to keep a smirk off her lips. What? Had he expected this to go perfectly? That his family would have proper manner because she was present? It was almost entertaining. And hell, if she really couldn’t leave tonight and had to spend it with these people, then she’d have some fun with it. Nothing wrong with poking the bear.


	2. Affection

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: All the brothers being possessive towards the deputy and trying to win her over

As hard as she tried to ignore the feeling in her gut, the one that screamed how perfect this was, that it was meant to be; she knew this was wrong. That cuddling up next to John Seed was beyond awful. The number one way to create more conflict than they already had. This wasn’t a Romeo and Juliet story, this wouldn’t help anyone.

But John was possessive and clingy and such a needy man. It was hard to break from his grasp that first time he blissed her and stuck her in his house.

That night spiraled around her head, buzzing incessantly. She replayed it back, curling a strand of his hair around her finger. Relishing the soft, calming breaths of sleep. She questioned when her feelings for him changed. What he said to make her keep coming back willingly.

_“Don’t look at me like that.”_

_“Like what?” It came off as a snarl as she struggled against the ropes digging in her skin._

_“Like you’re afraid of me.”_

_“John—“_

_“No!” He slammed his fist down on his intricate wooden table. “It’s bullshit.”_

_“You sent planes after me. Sent people to chase me down with bliss bullets.”_

_“How else was I supposed to get your attention?”_

_She blinked once. Twice. Nope, that was really the explanation he was going with. That was normal to him._

_“What do you want from me John? I’m not confessing, I’m not being baptised. Fuck you.” He sucked in a breath at her words. Like it stung him. She ignored the pang of regret she felt at the way he pouted. Head tipped down, not meeting her gaze._

_“Is it too much to ask for you? Will you give me that?”_

_“Me? You want me to give you...myself?”_

“ _Yes.” He rolled up his sleeves to his elbows. Scratching his jaw nervously. “Give me a week. If you still hate me by the end of it all...then we can go back to trying to kill each other.”_

At the time she thought it had been a distraction technique. That he was trying to divert where the war they were fighting was going. It must’ve had some ulterior motive. But being with him now for the past month. It was nice. _He_ was nice, a good man despite his crooked edges.

She squirmed out of bed, laying a kiss on his head. Grinning when he wiggled uncomfortably from the lack of body heat. Another chaste kiss was given, this time on his lips. And she wasn’t surprised at all when that woke him, that he reciprocated.

“What’re you doing?” Slurred from sleep, his bleary eyes trying to track her as she got dressed.

“Heading up to the mountains. Going hunting for wolves.”

Naturally he frowned, up on his elbows, panic on his face. “Be safe.”

“Always am.”

“Still…” he swung his legs over the edge of the bed. Stretching his arms over his head and sighing. “Maybe—never mind.” He curled in on himself, looking away.

“What is it Johnny?”

She saw the pink blush spreading over his skin at the nickname. When he didn’t answer she crawled on the bed next to him. Nuzzling in his neck.

“Maybe one more kiss.”

“God, you’re something else.”

She kissed him anyway.

*****

Going out into the mountains and only telling John was stupid. He must’ve let it slip that she was out there. That’s why Jacob found her so fast. He came up behind her with a thick arm wrapped around her throat and orders to follow him. A blindfold was tossed over her eyes, keeping her blissfully unaware.

“John’s gonna be pissed you know.”

She had no room to talk, to make threats or demands. She didn’t have the upper hand as he bound her hands and loaded her into his car.

“Yeah, I guess. I’ve always been good at handling his temper tantrums though. He must tire you out.”

“Nope.” She bit into her lower lip. Squirming when the car rolled to a stop and his large hand grabbed her upper thigh. Sliding up and down, going uncomfortably close to between her legs. 

“Let me make something very clear about what’s going on with you and my baby brother.”

Rook knew what this was about. He was protecting his family. Didn't want to see his brother hurt. She braced herself for his threats.

Her jaw was gripped tightly, blindfold tossed away. She focused on his proximity. Gasping when he was almost touching her nose with his. “You’re mine to own understand?” She would have laughed if not for how serious he sounded.

Jacob broke away and sped off again, acting like he didn’t just whisk her away with her only warning being his cryptic words.

*****

Three weeks had passed before John came to retrieve her. Word spreads fast in Hope County. Especially when there was the threat of the Baptist tearing through the place looking for the deputy.

She was back in his arms. In his secure grip in a few hours of him arriving at Jacobs compound. She didn’t hear much of the fight they had.

Just muffled raised voices before he had dragged her off in a huff.

He had driven them to the one place he felt safe. Joseph’s compound. His tiny little island with white buildings and a church. They were tucked away in some house he had steered her towards, making her think this wasn’t the first time he had come here looking for comfort.

He rocked back and forth. Holding her between his legs. Wrapping his arms around her. Keeping her close to his chest. “You’ll realize soon enough that no one appreciates you like I do. I’m not sure what happened with you and Jacob, but he doesn’t love you.”

She slammed her eyes shut. Conjuring up the time she spent with the eldest. She had enjoyed it, hadn’t she?

_“Look me in the eyes when I talk to you.”_

_Terrified didn’t even begin to describe the fear that was filling her system and making her stupid and numb. Every slight move he made to press kisses into her skin made her flinch. Constantly trying to get away. John would be mad, sure, Jacob was attractive and strong. But John was a jealous man. He’d kill her. Sooner or later he’d get worried that she didn’t come down from the mountains and he’d go on a warpath._

“ _You wanna leave pup? Fine, go ‘head. Go find Johnny. Let him take you in again.” He backed off suddenly. Unclipping the collar around her neck and pushing her towards the door. “But you’ll come back home eventually. You think you can leave me, you can’t. You can’t live without me.”_

“I’m yours John.”

“Yeah, that’s why you ran away.”

Her mouth tightened in a firm line. There was no use arguing with him.

“I promise.” She turned to face him, pressing a kiss to his lips that he didn’t respond to.

One day at a time.

*****

The knock at the door sounded late at night when John was sleeping and she was sitting on the floor by the bed. Hand running across his jaw.

Joseph Seed, The Father, hesitated at the entrance upon seeing the two.

He held out his hand for her. A silent command. And seeing how he sort of ran things around here, made her listen immediately. Blood running cold at the prospect at being alone with him. She’s encountered John and Jacob. Faced off with the men that she’s heard the worst things imaginable and lived to tell the tale. She’d be fine.

His hand was on her lower back, guiding her towards the church, ushering her inside with a welcoming smile that made her shoulders slump, trying to relax.

“Deputy, don’t think me a fool. I know why John ran here on such short notice and why you were being carted around with him despite you causing chaos for all of us. I see the way you look at him.”

He went to cup her cheeks, frowning when she flinched but accepted his touch all the same.

“I don’t know—“

“There’s no need to lie. I’m not going to judge you or my brothers for who they choose to love. That isn’t my place.”

She shifted from foot to foot. Was she cursed or something? To have three manic men pitting after her, it scared the crap out of her.

He leaned their foreheads together, breaking a moment later to press a kiss to her cheek. “I don’t wear jealousy well, yet I can’t help but seethe whenever I even think about them touching you. You must understand that I adore my brothers. I want them to be happy, but I want you for myself. I need you.”

Rook’s mouth felt dry, eyes bulging before she fixed her expression into a mask.

“Do you love my brothers?”

Did she?

It could be worse. It always could get worse. She’s heard so many things about them, things that she never experienced from their hands. That made them seem human, kinder. Like they had empathy and love inside them.

“Yes. I do.”

Joseph hummed. Letting his hands slip down the curve of her neck, to her shoulder, running down her arms to form goosebumps and stopping at her hips.

“And me?”

God no. Not with the title he held. The reputation he built.

“Joseph…” There was doubt in her voice, skepticism she wouldn’t be able to hide even if she tried.

“I want you to say you love me.” He yanked them closer, pressing into the curves of her body. His lips molded to her neck. Mouthing wetly. “Say it and mean it child.”

It was a command. An order she was expected to follow. There was no choice, not unless she wanted hell to reign down upon her.

“I love you.” She accentuated her words by drawing his head up and kissing him.

This was her normal now. Lie after lie to keep them satiated and herself alive.


	3. Argument

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Jacob and John get into an argument about the deputy, leading to Jacob throwing something at John; and hitting Joseph in the face instead

“For the last time I said no!”

“Who the fuck died and made you queen?”

John spun around on his heel. Lips twisted into a scowl, face reddening out of anger. He was like a child with his fists clenched by his side, one leg stomping down, making the silverware on the table clang around. “Excuse me?”

“Yeah,” Jacob scratched at his beard. Looking up and to the left as if he was deep in thought. “I guess I didn’t get the memo that suddenly your word was law. That you’re a fucking God and decides what happens to Rook.” He stalked closer, so much larger and intimidating than the baptist. “She’s her own person, not a goddamn pawn.”

“Oh that’s rich.” John jabbed his finger in Jacob’s chest. Stabbing him roughly, craning his neck to look up at him. “Coming from a man who tells people they’re tools. Meat. Does that sound familiar? If anything you’re the one treating people like they don’t matter.”

Jacob let out a slow breath through his nose. Exhaling roughly to reign in some sense of control. Trying his hardest not to put his younger brother in a headlock. For some reason he’s pretty sure he’d be the one to get in trouble at the end of the day for that one. So he’d let John yap at him like an annoying Pomeranian.

“Are you done?”

“Am I done!” John shoved Jacob, arms shooting out to make him stumble a few steps back. “God you’re insufferable. She wouldn’t want you! She doesn’t need you!” His voice sounded strangely wet as he turned away.

“She needs a greedy man who fillets people?”

“Do not call out my sins when I’ve confessed and atoned. Which is more than you’ve done.” John huffed, glancing over his shoulder. “And I’m sure she would want me, a man who’s rich, a man who everyone can talk to without fear of judgement, a man who’s handsome. Fuck, have you looked in a mirror lately Jacob? Those scars aren’t doing anyone any favors.” This

That was too far. Pointing out Jacob’s faults and flaws. Those insecurities that he buried deep until they were at the back of his mind and it’s like they didn’t exist at all. For his brother to say those things, and because of the deputy nonetheless. It was petty and childish. If John wanted to act like a child then Jacob could too.

This was John’s ranch, and John, it just so happened, had many, many things. His house was filled to the brim, not a realist like Jacob, who only took the essentials. He liked to show off, to express himself. He really was like a teenager.

Jacob didn’t have to reach far to wrap his hands around something. The Book of Joseph. A large white bound hunk of paper that was heavy enough to do some damage if the right man threw it. And Jacob was definitely the right man to put some force behind it.

He chucked the book, drawing back his arm and hurling it towards John.

A yelp fell from John’s lips. His hands went to cover his head as he dropped to the floor. Slamming down on his knees. It was laughable, the squeal he produced at the projectile coming at him. How he bundled up on the floor as if the collapse was upon them. What wasn’t laughable is where the book found a home. A very fleshy, alive, philanthropic home in the form of a 6”1 prophet.

Jacob tensed when Joseph stumbled back. Barking out a surprised scream when his own book smacked him in the face. Knocking his glasses onto the floor where they immediately smashed. Splintering a crack up one of the lenses as he bent down to inspect it. He sighed heavily, saying crouched down next to John. Eyes flickering between his brothers.

“John.”

“He did it!” His arm snapped out to point at Jacob, shuffling closer to Joseph in the process. Sulking like he wasn’t the one who provoked Jacob in the first place.

“Yes. I saw who threw the book. I’m just wondering why we are throwing things in the house like children.”

“It-it was Rook.”

Jacob sucked in a breath at the stupidity of those words. This wasn’t Joseph’s fight.

“So,” Joseph stood, lifting John to his feet. “The reason my nose is throbbing is because Rook did it?” He winced, rubbing his face and making a beeline for the freezer. “I should contact her then, make her pay for the medical supplies needed to fix my nose.” There was a glint of amusement in his eyes as he caught Jacob’s gaze. Shaking his head as he pressed a bag of cold peas to the offending bruise. Clicking his tongue at the sudden rush of coldness.

Joseph leaned on the counter, eyebrows raised in curiosity, “Why are we talking about Rook?”

John shifted on his feet. Scratching his beard, taking a deep breath with all the energy running through him. “I think she’d prefer me over Jacob. Should I list the ways?” Said in an offhand way with his hand on his hip, a light smile over his flushed face. Apparently not learning his lesson from the first time when Jacob hurled something his way. Because he was quick to do it again. Reaching out for the half finished and forgotten about mug of coffee John put down in the midst of their argument. Tossing it with as much vigor as when the book laid in his hands. The spray of coffee and the undignified scream John let out as it stained his clothes was just as amusing as the first time.


	4. Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Proposal stories for all three Seed brothers

**John**

He hadn’t been overt about it, not when his perception of love was all sorts of fucked up. With how he was brought up, without caring parents and searching for warmth in other’s bodies despite what they actually were like, he wasn’t sure how to approach the subject.

He’d tease her with the idea whenever they found a sweet moment together and his heart started racing and he couldn’t take in a proper breath with how she was looking at him like he was her world. John Duncan never thought marriage would even be on his mind, except as a scornful blurry image that made his stomach church uncomfortably.

Marriage was for the stable man with a 9 to 5 job and a white picket fence. A man who lived in a cul-de-sac and threw barbecues for his neighbors. He had Christmas parties and talked football with his father in law and listened dutifully to cooking tips from his mother in law.

It wasn’t _him_.

And yet he was handling a tiny box with care. Pacing back and forth wearing a rut into his wooden bedroom floor, cradling the package against his chest as if it were the small kitten he had been pushing Rook to buy for their ranch that seemed a tad too empty.

The pep talk running through his head on repeat was less encouraging then the ones he got from his family. It did little to boost any sort of confidence he once had a few weeks ago when he only mentioned it to them in passing.

There wasn’t a date he had to do it, he was sure dep didn’t know the question was buzzing around constantly in his head, but it felt like he had to get it done. Before she up and left like any other good thing in his life. Or he just chickened out. Not like Joseph would let him do that. He had radiated such pride when John had told him what he was planning on doing. Letting him down was worse than letting himself down.

“John?”

His entire body tensed as if it wasn’t his soon to be wife talking to him. A distant voice coming from the doorway with evident concern he’d see if he turned around.

“Are you okay?”

God he hated that question. And she knew it. The first time she asked he had broken down in tears. Clinging to her and spilling out secrets and fears as if she had signed up for the mess that he was.

Her footsteps coming near startled him out of his mind. Made him shove the boxed ring into the pocket of his jacket at the last second as she wrapped his arms around his neck from behind.

“Whatcha hiding?”

“Nothing.” John cleared his throat and willed the tears in his eyes to dissipate. “Don’t worry about it. It’s not important.”

**Jacob**

Jacob had scoffed at the thought of marriage. Thought himself too damaged for the pictures it brought to mind.

_A week later he bought a ring._

He had toiled over it when Joseph had dragged his good for nothing, self wallowing ass to Montana with big plans that he shook his head at. Thought that settling down permanently would make him stable. When he realized that the change in scenery absolutely didn’t help at all, he tossed out the thought once again. Threw it to the wolves and screams of those who opposed Eden’s Gate.

_Five days later he got a haircut, making him look the most civilized he had in a long time._

Jacob wasn’t what women wanted. The soft caring part came with too many hours of sacrificing their own wants and needs that they all up and left him to gasp for air. He didn’t need to be further dragged down anyway. They were weak.

_Two days later he used that crappy cologne John had gotten him three years ago for Christmas._

Marriage wasn’t for everyone. Some cop out thing he had said to Joseph when he kept bringing it up.

_Now he was clutching Rook’s hand a little too tightly and overlooking the mountains in all their glory._

There were still those thoughts running in his head and making him shove the ring deeper into his pocket. He pulled her closer. Making her mold into his side with her head beneath his chin. He kissed the crown of her head.

She knew something was up, she knew him so well and saw the small minute changes . That it was strange how he had found some free time for a weekend getaway all of a sudden.

Rook also could sense how scared he was. That’s why she kept her mouth firmly shut. Patiently waiting until he’d pull that damn ring out of his pocket and just ask. She could wait though.

**Joseph**

From the beginning she was hesitant to believe what Joseph mumbled under his breath into her hair each night as he held her close to him. That she was devout, holy. Something brought about by the Lord that was his ultimate gift for what he has done, the sacrifices he’s made and pain he's endured.

Nodding and smiling about it was one thing. Riding off his comments of marriage and undying love as the dreaded honeymoon phase that she used to look at with disgust. She was living it now. Being showered with affection that made her knees shake in fear of not meeting his expectations for being the literal gift of God to His prophet. Most days she figured Joseph didn’t know the pressure he was putting her under.

Gazing down at Joseph with a wide mouth stare and facing reality head on was so much more different than the fairy tale he made life become for her.

He had gone the cliche route and she wasn’t all that surprised. Had almost been a little too nauseous and giddy when he offered to take her for a walk along the Henbane. These impromptu times alone wasn’t unusual. But there was something odd about his smile that night when he pulled on a jacket and motioned an arm out for her to hold. She gripped onto him with such ferocity, as if he were an anchor that could ground her.

Turns out all the mental preparation in the world wouldn’t have gotten her ready for when he spit out some long spiel as she bounced on the heels of her feet. Clutching her arms around herself to fight off the sudden chill that surrounded them.

Too soon she fell down next to him. Catching his look of fear that seized him. Panic bubbling up in his lips that soon died off as she grabbed his face and pulled him near. Yanking him into a kiss and muttering a thousand yeses when she came up for air.


	5. Bunker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: All three Seed brothers are stuck in the bunker. Some small snippets of the events that take place

The banging on the door made her jump from where she was standing. It caused the metal rock on its hinges.

“I swear to God, you two have been in there for fucking hours!”

John shot her a cheeky smile. Laughing softly as he leaned forward to swipe a razor across his throat to trim up his beard.

“He sounds angry.” She moved by him in their confined space to grab a bar of soap, towel hanging around her as she hopped back in the small shower. Yanking the curtains shut and catching the way John simply laughed at her comment.

“Its early morning.” John leaned towards the door, cocking his head as if to hear better. “He’s just angry. Should cool down soon. We can wait it out.” Yelling the last part so Jacob could hear from behind the door.

Another sharp bang had the youngest brother jumping back. Smile gone.

“You think you’re funny?”

“Very.” He tossed on his clothes. Dropping his sodden towel on the floor to create a small puddle of water, something Jacob made clear to them not to do.

Rook peaked her head out from the shower. Eyes falling to the towel and flicking back up to John as he buttoned his shirt. “Digging your own grave now.”

He just shrugged, reaching out to grab a fluffy white towel for her to take and turning away to face the door. Humming obnoxiously and rocking on his heels. From inside the bathroom they could both hear the two Seeds going back and forth.

“Joe I’m gonna kill ‘em.”

“Both of them?” Even without seeing Joseph she could hear the slightly distracted tone of his voice. How it sounded like he was busy doing something else and just entertaining Jacob. There was a twinge of amusement there too, as if he was recalling moments from their childhood that was shockingly similar.

“Yea, both of them.” His footsteps bounded back over to the door as he leaned his weight against it. “They've been in there for two hours.”

“It’s a small bathroom Jacob, give them time. Besides, this place wasn’t built for four people.” By now Rook had thrown on her own clothes, crowding next to John as they pushed their ears against the door to listen.

“There is no rush, we’ve got time.”

Jacob snorted, knocking his boot on the door out of anger before stomping away.

“I think we’re good.” John mumbled, biting his knuckle in hopes to hide the smile creeping on his face. As a precaution he called out, “Is the coast clear Joseph?” A sort of whisper yell that had her rolling her eyes.

“He is, I’m not sure where he went though, I’d be careful if I were you.”

She swung the door open. Met with Joseph who wore his glasses on his head and had a towel curled over his arm. “Go on you two, before Jacob realizes he’ll have to go last today.”

This small family dynamic they had was bizarre. How Joseph could joke around like he wasn’t as serious as she first assumed. That he was just as normal as she was and pulling his brother’s leg. Doing something as harmless as making him wait for his turn in the shower was something he definitely wasn’t against.

John sidled past, clapping his brother on the shoulder and receiving a passing wink. Rook was quick to follow, slamming the door shut behind Joseph, just loud enough for it to make a resounding echo across the entire bunker.

“You two done? Have fun taking a fucking bubble bath your highnesses?”

John jerked as he swiveled to look at Jacob at where he was standing in the doorway. Jacob walked forward as if he was stalking his prey, patting John’s cheek a little too hard for brotherly affection and freezing. “Don’t tell me you were in there for so long because you were shaving your face. Who in the fuck are you trying to impress?”

For once John almost looked sheepish. Shoulders crawling up around his neck as he let a small laugh slip past his lips. “Well to be fair I wasn’t the only one shaving.” That drew a scoff from Jacob and had Rook’s cheeks heating up. “And,” John rose a finger to accentuate his point, “It wasn’t just my face that I was shaving.”

That comment had Jacob toss up his hands and twirl away. Tossing his towel to the ground and spitting of a litany of curse words. “Too much information John! I’m done, I’m so past done with you.”

*****

When she first walked in what she didn’t expect was to find Joseph on the couch, curled up in a mountain of blankets with just his face peeking out and looking absolutely miserable.

“You--uh--you okay there?”

His eyes slipped towards her. Glassy and unfocused as he trembled. “Fine.” He let out a soft sigh as she frowned at how obviously not okay he was. “It’s just cold.” She nodded her understanding, she wasn’t freezing, but even if she hated the guy she had enough of a heart to make sure he didn’t turn into a damn popsicle. Where were his brothers when he was practically dying?

“I think there’s a thermostat somewhere…”

“You shouldn’t--”

“Joseph.” She rose her voice an octave higher. “Shut it.”

Rook disappeared around the corner to come into contact with the thermostat. “52 degrees fahrenheit, who the hell…” She shook her head, hand brushing the panel and clicking the buttons before they all froze in their sleep.

“What do you think you’re doing?”

She didn’t have time to react before John was on her. Pushing her into the wall, chest pressing into the thermostat painfully. His hands were braced on her shoulders, hot breath mingling on her neck. Sharing in her gasps.

“Joseph is turning blue in the other room, it’s freezing in here.”

“Joseph will live. It is hot.” Punctuated words that made her blood run cold.

“Fuck John, you going through menopause?”

There was a bark of laughter from behind them. Jacob crossing his arms over his chest and watching the encounter like it wouldn’t end with someone clutching a broken nose. “Joseph get in here!” He cupped a hand over his mouth, amusement written over his face when he caught Rook’s eyes. “It’s like seeing two baby penguins go at it.” Her eyes shuttered down to where he was holding a copious amount of blankets.

So he had known. Had known his brother was cold and knew, way more than she did, that John wouldn’t let anyone mess with the temperature.

John sighed deeply, tugging her away forcefully and shoving his body in front of the thermostat protectively. “We are not fighting. We are merely,” he sighed deeply, running a hand down his face. “Conversing. Having a civil discussion.”

“One that’ll kill us all!” She tossed her hands up, anger crossing her features before storming past Jacob. Yanking the blankets he had piled up in his arms and stomping into Joseph’s room.

*****

“Please don’t.” From where she was listening from the other room it sounded like John was on the verge of tears.

“Gotta feed you all, can’t just scrap it.”

“But you can Jake, that’s the thing.” John let out a low groan, peaking into the other room at where she was sitting. Tipping a bottle of water into her mouth to stave off the hunger pangs that started an hour ago. Around the same time she had shoved Jacob into the kitchen with an order to make something because Joseph was too busy praying and John just didn’t cook.

When their eyes caught together she simply cocked an eyebrow at him. Didn’t miss how he sighed deeply, returning his gaze back into where his brothers were hovering over the stove.

“She’d probably rather starve.”

“Let her decide that once she gets a taste.”

Another grunt of frustration from John as he clenched his hands into fists and meandered to the corner of the kitchen. Watching from afar.

“Maybe just add some more pasta.” A less than helpful addition from Joseph. His soothing voice, for once, not doing much.

“If I add more pasta some will be cooked, some will be undercooked.”

“Flour?” Rook caught sight of Joseph passing by the doorway. Huddling near Jacob over a pot of steaming food.

“God!” John chimed in, anger boiling over again. “Have either of you ever cooked? Flour does not go in Mac and cheese!”

She placed down the book she had been pulling close to her chest, trying, unsuccessfully, to read onto the next paragraph. She had to see what all the fuss was about. Because try as she might, there was no way she could imagine how making dinner for the four of them would be so damn difficult.

She leaned in the doorway. Observing from the threshold as Jacob threateningly held flour over the pot of what John had called mac and cheese, even though from where she was, it looked neon yellow.

“Don’t you dare put that in our food.” John almost pounced. Probably would have made a huge mess on the ground if it hadn’t of been for Joseph standing in between. Pushing him back and murmuring for him to calm down. Not like that did much.

Jacob looked smugly at his youngest brother being held back, tossing her a wink and smile before tipping it into the pot.

Turns out, flour was thick, and in theory might thicken something up, so why the fuck was the mac and cheese so watery?


	6. Headcanon Sweet Tea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Seeds getting Montana born and raised Deputy to try some old fashioned Southern sweet tea

**John**

  * John is the first one to figure out that Rook’s never been down South a day in her life, that she hasn’t experienced real Southern sweet tea in all its glory.
  * John has a literal addiction to the stuff. It’s the only habit he couldn’t kick when Joseph found him.
  * When he was younger he was just a fancy playboy lawyer who was very suave and professional, good at what he does. And a client just walks in on him with this huge drink of sweet tea in a styrofoam cup that has some fast food logo on it. Like they have half a mind to leave with how he kept drinking it and never was seen without it.
  * It’s at his ranch when Rook admits to never trying the drink before and his reaction would be to just kick her out. Like leave my house or drink this tea.
  * He definitely has an extra fridge filled with sweet tea, stocked to the brim and imported from Georgia.
  * Is moments away from pouring the drink down Rook’s throat. Holding her against the wall and being all endearing and smiling like he isn’t about to make her kneel and force it on her.
  * If Rook refused John would be a petty little brat and wouldn’t speak to her until she drank it. Requires a damn picture just to believe her and act like nothing ever happened.
  * Will totally start pushing it on her. Brings it to church sermons and has it as the only drink option when she comes over for lunch.



**Jacob**

  * Hates sweet tea. Absolutely despises it. Can’t stand the stuff and gags at the thought of it. Like he can taste it from remembering the first time he tried the shit.
  * Makes his stomach ache
  * Does not blame Rook at all for never trying it, almost envies her for not having to grow up around it. Not having it pushed into his face not only from other Southerners but from his brothers.
  * If he does give her some to taste it would be from her asking him to, not the other way around.
  * Just shrugs. Sitting back and watching. “Your funeral pup, don’t say I didn’t warn ya.”
  * She just might have the guts to push it on him. To climb all over him to make him take a sip.
  * If she likes it he will refer her to John. Let them bond over that crap. He doesn’t need another person to bring it up again and again that he might like it despite years of despising the drink.
  * When he was younger he’d spend the little amount of money he had stole to buy sweet tea for John and Joseph because he knew they liked it and he wanted to see their faces light up.
  * Tolerated it just for them and only ever for them.
  * Drank it throughout his military service given the rare moment. It was awful and made him wince, but it was his brother's favorite drink and he needed it to ground him. Like when he woke up from a night terror, he’d have it by his side and down a few swigs to remind him where he was and where he came from.



**Joseph**

  * Was the one who showed it to his brothers. Brought it home and snuck it past his father into their bedroom to try
  * Fell in love with it
  * Was a vice for him. A way to find some scrap of enjoyment in his life
  * Drinks it before sermons or before he has to speak to some large group of his flock.
  * A way to relieve stress.
  * Totally cheats and adds water or some unsweetened tea to the mix because he doesn’t need all that sugar. Not looking for any reasons to make his teeth rot.
  * Is offput when Rook casually mentions she’s never had any when she caught him drinking it way too early in the morning.
  * Like he can’t possibly trust anyone who has never experienced such a staple in Southern origin.
  * It’s ingrained in his blood and she needs to have some.
  * Doesn’t miss a beat when he pushed the cup he was drinking out of into her hands with a careful eye watching her.
  * Laughs if she grimaces and hacks like a dog. Is used to that reaction after growing up with Jacob.
  * Teases her about it before downing the entire drink right in front of her, much to her horror, and brushing by her like it was totally normal.




	7. Headcanon Rook's Nipple Piercing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Seeds finding out Rook has a nipple piercing and their reactions to it

**John**

  * When John finds out it just by word of mouth, not actually seeing. And that has to change, obviously.
  * Outright demands for Rook to take off her shirt, suddenly this is the top priority. He doesn’t care that she was in the middle of doing something. Now.
  * Can’t keep his hands to himself.
  * All touchy-feely and asking hundreds of questions while tugging at the piercings with too much force, like he wasn’t about to put a tear through her nipple.
  * Not against it in the slightest.
  * Has seen his fair share of body modifications in his youth with the people he took home, used to it.
  * This is kind of tame, but he loves it on Rook a lot more than he remembers liking nipple piercings.
  * Buys her sheer things to wear just so her piercings would show.



**Jacob**

  * Oh, he’s into it.
  * Totally yes. He adores keeping her shirtless for him as much as possible.
  * Never thought he’d like it so much until she had undressed and he caught sight of it.
  * Stopped her dead in her tracks just to stare and marvel.
  * Goes right into to touch her breasts. Doesn’t even ask. He belongs to her after all.
  * Is into touching her nipples even more. Whether she’s naked or not. Will constantly run his hands over her breasts.



**Joseph**

  * Is used to people with piercings has seen some of his congregants with nose piercings and has heard of some having navel piercings, but nipple, that's a whole new territory that hasn’t ever crossed his mind.
  * Is more curious than anything.
  * Almost hesitant. Tipping his head in concern with questions of worry.
  * Doesn’t want to touch anywhere around her breasts at first. Too afraid he’d yank it out with a simple touch.
  * Honestly though if she’s happy then so is he.
  * It’s her body after all
  * Modesty is a big thing in Eden’s Gate but that part of her body just makes him weak. And he wants it to be shown off for him.




	8. Caught (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request:
> 
> “I could be doing worse.”
> 
> “Hey,” she held up her hands and laughed mockingly at him, at how desperate he seemed to keep his composure. “I’m not judging you here. Not my job, I don’t have time for that.”
> 
> He pried open an eye to find her. Brows furrowed and nose wrinkled.
> 
> “But yes, there’s a lot worse out there. You could be...what,” she tilted her head in consideration, “7, maybe 8 inches deep in some pretty thing, huh John.” His hips jerked rougher at her comment. “Could have someone underneath you and moaning your name and begging for more.” Rook couldn’t hold back the smile this time around at how needy he was.

**John**

She knew coming into this that it was dangerous, stupid even. That this was John’s house. Temperamental John who would cut her up into a thousand pieces and leave her body on the doorstep of Jerome’s church, but when she heard he had fortified his house into a damn fortress like he was truly the king of the land, well she’d be remiss if she didn’t check it out for herself.

Worst case scenario going into this being that the man was home, already waiting with Chosen at his order.

That’s what she had originally thought until she arrived and made her way up the stairs. Skipping steps when just the barest of weight made them creak.

Eyes more focused on tightening her hold on her gun, more preoccupied with checking herself over. Accounting for her knives and the baseball bat she had sticking out of her bag.

Rook’s mind was already frazzled from the heat she had been suffering through on the walk to his ranch, her nerves frayed to their ends that she was way past the point of listening like she should be.

Her hand shoved on the beautifully carved wooden door that was open just enough to reveal a sliver of light.

She stood stock still in the doorway. Moving to backtrack at the sight she saw. Preemptively raising her hand to conceal the image that was forever going to be seared on her brain.

“Fuck.” She snarled out the words louder than she should’ve. Peering behind splayed fingers only to catch John’s eyes. Which were hard and glaring. Turning an icy blue she’s never seen before. Clouded over by lust and anger.

“Deputy.” His voice was absolutely wrecked in the best of ways. Almost coming out in a whine. “May I ask what the hell you're doing here? On—“ he cried out through clenched teeth and made the bed springs creak when he moved too fast. Bucking his hips up into what she could now see was his tight grip fisting at himself. “On private property nonetheless.”

His hand was moving fast, slick noises filled the room along with his grunts. A tense silence filling the air as he awaited some kind of response. “Yeah. I’m just gonna go, I shouldn’t have—“

“No.” John agreed tersely. “You shouldn’t have done a lot of things. Yet here you are.” He sighed. Stopping his movements but keeping a firm hand on his dick. “Trespassing. Invading my privacy. The list of sins, of wrongdoings, it just never ends with you.”

Her hand pressed more firmly down over her eyes. Not caring that her pistol was pushing into the soft skin of her nose, most likely leaving an awful indent of metal.

“Don’t be rude. Look at me, I’m trying to be civil here.” He had the audacity to sound normal. Like he wasn’t the one caught with his pants down.

“You’re naked John, not taking the chances of seeing what you’re packing.”

“I’m not naked.” John mused. Huffing a soft laugh at her reddening cheeks.

At his words she did peak out from her hand again. Letting her eyes drift over him. Pants and underwear long gone. Vest open, hanging off one shoulder. Button up shirt shoved up, exposing his stomach and a thick patch of hair that led down.

“You’re more naked than I’d want.”

“You like it.”

Her eyebrows rose. Hand falling down to her side without much thought. Mouth gaping wide at his sudden confidence. Yeah, leave it to John to only get hornier from an audience. Leave it to him to give her a very much unasked for demonstration on how vocal he was. Which brought to the forefront of her mind how exactly this scene came to be. How did John go from the man who preached about sin to this dirty, loud picture in front of her?

She couldn’t help but imagine him cupping himself through his jeans, telling himself that there was time to turn back. That he could still back away, though by the end he pulled himself out. So tired of battling with himself.

Rook could see him through her mind’s eye, him steadily moving faster. Falling back into step, body reacting accordingly as his nerves absolutely sung with pleasure. Remembering how he liked it best. He’d loosen up eventually, stop paying attention so well. Chasing his end would become way more important than keeping watch.

And that’s where they were now. With her feeling guilty about catching him off guard. Embarrassment was pretty high up there too on her list.

“I’m gonna go.”

“No.”

She barked a laugh at his abrupt response. Labored and barley there words.

“I’d love to see you running outside to catch me with your dick out. That would make for quite the gossip around here.” She saw the immediate effects that her words had on him. That he went deathly pale, halting his process of driving himself closer to the edge. “So you’re gonna stay right there in your bed and jack off and I’m leaving.”

“What exactly do I get out of this arrangement?” He leaned back on his headboard. Skull hitting the wood roughly, making him wince. “How do I profit from this…encounter?”

“I won’t go running my mouth.” She crossed her arms over her chest. Keeping her eyes strictly on his face and not on the steady hand he had around his length. “Joseph won’t know you were fooling around.”

“I could be doing worse.”

“Hey,” she held up her hands and laughed mockingly at him, at how desperate he seemed to keep his composure. “I’m not judging you here. Not my job, I don’t have time for that.”

He pried open an eye to find her. Brows furrowed and nose wrinkled.

“But yes, there’s a lot worse out there. You could be...what,” she tilted her head in consideration, “7, maybe 8 inches deep in some pretty thing, huh John.” His hips jerked rougher at her comment. “Could have someone underneath you and moaning your name and begging for more.” Rook couldn’t hold back the smile this time around at how _needy_ he was.

“Or hell, maybe you like someone fucking you instead. Pounding into your ass and making you feel so full until you can’t see straight.” She dared to walk closer. Right to the edge of his bed. Close enough that if she wanted she could reach out and grab his ankle. She didn’t, she had more self control.

“It could be worse, you could have someone between your legs and working you so well. Or, once again, you could be the one with a cock shoved so far down your throat you can’t even breath.” She stressed the words, leaned forward and made enough noise for John to take notice of where she moved to.

“But you’re not.” Rook turned on her heel. Ignoring John’s low whimper in his throat. Feeling guilt for a whole new reason when she obviously left him wanting. “You’re here. Alone.”

“Don’t leave.” She paused at the entrance of his door. Hand holding tightly onto the frame and listening to his panting breaths. “Just stay, let me look. I won’t touch. Promise.”

Her head jerked, glancing over her shoulder at him. At the pathetic mess he turned into just at a couple of words.

“Fine.”

“You’ll stay?” He twisted his wrist. Knees jerking up at the sharp jolts of pleasure running through him.

“Yes. Yes John, I’ll stay.”

**Jacob**

She wasn’t sure what she was expecting. Hunting was a new sport to her. Something she never bothered with until she got to the mountains and money became scarce.

Rook was putting it off until the last minute, until she had to hang her head in shame on multiple occasions when asking friends for a small loan that she couldn’t afford to pay back. She was afraid hunting would be boring.

Maybe she would’ve been urged to go out if someone told her she’d get such a nice view. Said view being way better than the sunset she had sat watching an hour beforehand.

Jacob knew how to put on quite the show. Christ, the man would do so many things to her if he found out she was taking in the sight of him with his cock out, but doing it out in the open…bad fucking choice on his part.

Not like she could complain too much. Her thighs were already pressing together uncomfortably from her position behind some bushes she couldn’t be bothered to care about sticking her in the ribs.

His back was up against a tree, somehow lucid enough to hold himself upright as he stroked himself. Muttering words she couldn’t make out under his breath. Eyes downcast, occasionally slipping closed when a jolt of pleasure ran through him.

His legs spread wider, giving himself more room to work as he cursed. Loud and clear from her spot a few feet away. He was building himself up. Stroking faster, one hand balling into the fabric of his shirt, holding it up and out of the way. The other hand doing all the work. He didn’t waste time teasing himself, not caring to make it last. That was something she noted, as if she’d ever be in a position to treat him better than he could himself.

Jacob finished earlier than she would’ve liked. Cutting the show a little short in her opinion. Hardly making any noise as he came across his hand and the forest floor. He was panting slightly, shoulders relaxing for the first time she’s ever known the man.

Rook stood on shaking feet. Hands clutching onto a nearby tree to steady herself as she breathed in deep. Replaying through what she just saw. Saving that image for tonight.

“You know Deputy,” Rook tensed worse than she ever has. Turning her head to catch sight of Jacob; who was still leaning up against the tree. Voice loud enough to carry across the forest to her. He was pushing himself back into his jeans. Fixing his belt with the faintest of smiles. “If you wanted to watch me you shoulda just asked. Promise I wouldn’t have minded, it’s rude though, to sneak up on me like that.” He sighed deeply, as if disappointed in her. Head still down as he ran fingers through his hair. “Just creeping around corners without my permission. I’d run if I were you.” His eyes flicked up briefly to where she stood unmoving. Squinting like he could see through the thick bushes. “Bad pups need to be punished, they need to learn exactly what I want from them. I’ll give ya a head start dep.”

**Joseph**

Coming to his compound for the purpose of snooping around was stupid. She could admit that. Which brought a smile to her face despite the circumstances because fuck you Joseph, pride is not a sin she carries, thank you very much.

Though the circumstances she found herself in now was worse than those she’s ever experienced since coming to this godforsaken county, considering she was standing with her back pressed painfully against the wooden wall with fucking Joseph Seed walking around the room.

What she could now identify as his room as soon as he strolled in, a moment too early on her part.

The man didn’t have any windows, and no, she didn’t count the tiny little porthole that she wouldn’t be able to wiggle out of even if she lost twenty pounds and grew another foot. Nowhere to run or hide as his footsteps grew louder from down the hall.

Her train of thought deviated from running to hiding. Under the bed was fucking dumb, for reasons she didn’t have to think two seconds about, cause y’know—she’d rather not get caught. The closet was second. Which didn’t work, because despite Joseph being shirtless every single time she saw him, his wardrobe was crammed full with no way of being able to hold a human body.

Joseph took her presence in stride. Full

of confidence for God’s plans when he caught her in his room, standing there as if she belonged.

The smile he gave her was strained. Not at all comforting when he met her eyes. Not yet fully addressing her as he should’ve been. There were no speeches or lectures coming from the preacher this time around.

Joseph—he, ah...well clearly he had other priorities.

Said priorities being more about collapsing down on his bed, elbows resting on his thighs with a prominent bulge in his jeans that he wasted no time unzipping. Like she wasn’t there at all.

She heard the soft sigh he gave off at the relief of pressure.

His hands were clasped, eyes closed tightly as he mumbled prayers under his breath. God, she almost wanted to reach out to him and tell him to get on with it. If anyone needed the stress relief, deserved it even, it’d be him. Maybe he’d be less inclined to shoot her up with bliss bullets. Maybe he’d even be calm enough to let her walk out of here.

“Excuse me Child. I’m human. I have thoughts and urges.”

“Yeah. I get it.” She swallowed thickly at the sudden noise in the room. Taking a step away from him. Fear injecting in her veins, scared of seeing him so unhinged.

He didn’t wait much longer after his apology. His resolve broke, crumbled right before her eyes.

“Maybe this is God telling me, or…” He floundered for words, something she’s never seen before, “or showing me how to act. That these thoughts plaguing me are only normal.”

His jeans and underwear were thrown to the ground and he just paced. Back and forth, making the floorboards hiss under him. Cock hanging heavy with each uneven step he took. His glare was strong when he passed a glance across the room, catching her gaze before flitting to the sorry excuse of a window for half a second and dropping his gaze back down to what he probably considered a bigger problem then what it was. As if willing himself to soften.

“Joseph.” Rook risked speaking. Only talking in a whisper. Sucking in a breath at the darkness in his eyes.

“Yes Deputy?”

His fists clenched around nothing. Tightening and loosening over and over again.

He fell onto the bed fully. Leaning on the headboard. Hand hovering before brushing over himself gently. Teasing the idea. Seeing the pleasure it would bring him with a simple touch. He was barley paying her attention. Almost missing her next spoken words.

“I can leave…”

“No. You can’t. He brought you to me, don’t keep running from your purpose.”

Rook saw the change in his features when his mind shifted and he threw his morals right out and wrapped a hand around himself. Sobbing at the contact. Letting out a strangled groan that had her muffling her own whines.

His teeth were bared. Nails digging into the lust scar carved into his naval. A constant reminder as to what he was doing.

The pace he took was fast. Sloppy too, from what she could see. His hand always slipping off, moving too high when he stroked up. Unused to the motion. But it got the job done if his groans were anything to go by.

His head was tipped back as he slowed down, thumb brushing over his slit. Hips jerking on their own accord as he finished with a feather light touch.

Joseph stayed like that long enough for her legs to grow weary. With his head against the headboard and his eyes closed. Soft cock held in a loose grip.

She shifted. Too scared to offer up her leaving again. Not when Joseph seemed hellbent on the idea that her catching him in his most intimate moment was something close to destiny.

Looks like she’d be in for a long night. But...her lips curled up. Joseph was still laying bare. At least she had something pretty to look at.


	9. Attention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request:
> 
> “Come here John. Look.”
> 
> John’s movements were stiff as he stumbled towards them. Stopping short in front of Joseph. Eyeing her wearly.
> 
> “Do you see how wrath can be quelled with the opposite emotion?” Joseph asked softly. Breath coming out in a whisper. Guiding John’s gaze down to watch her.
> 
> “I see Joseph.”
> 
> “Do you know that you push your sins on others?”

She couldn't, for the life of her, figure out the enigma that was John Seed.

Her back was tense, stomach curled into knots as she sat in front of Joseph. Hand fisting the material of the table cloth in her hands. Lip pinched between her teeth in a rough grip that John was quick to chastise her on. Because of course he wouldn’t want her to be get hurt. At least not when big brother was watching from the sidelines with hawk like eyes. Ever ready to correct John’s form. Quick to remind him of love. It didn't help that his advice would always come with a demonstration.

Joseph would move towards her after John was too heavy handed with her. He’d cradle her head and coo at her like she was a child. Gentle hands carding through her hair and telling her how special she was to him, to Eden’s Gate. That soon her purpose would be revealed.

All the while John was fuming behind Joseph’s back. Arms crossed over his slim chest, lip jutting out in a pout as he stood with his hip cocked. If he was feeling ballsy he’d tap his foot impatiently. Anger showing through even if that was exactly what Joseph was struggling to eradicate out of his system.

“See John?”

John’s eyes dragged back to where Joseph hovered over Rook, the back of his hand against her cheek. Showing how she was leaning into the touch. She didn’t like it. God that was so far from the truth. The man could kill her so easily if he wanted, there was no need to cozy up to him now. Her only reason to keen up at Joseph like he was her savoir was for John.

The precious baby brother who adored Joseph. Anyone could see that. He bared that weakness so easily. Showing it in his entire face whenever Joseph gave him praise or told him some sacred massage. She leaned into Joseph’s touch with a starry gaze just to see how John reacted each and every time. It was simple to wind him up and watch him go. Firing off at her when Joseph retreated into his room on the second floor of the ranch.

There was no reason to be scared of John hurting her. He’s done it before, resulting in more choice words from Joseph the next time they saw each other.

So she sat pliantly as Joseph stroked her cheek. Locking eyes with John as she tried and failed to conceal a smirk.

“Come here John. Look.”

John’s movements were stiff as he stumbled towards them. Stopping short in front of Joseph. Eyeing her wearly.

“Do you see how wrath can be quelled with the opposite emotion?” Joseph asked softly. Breath coming out in a whisper. Guiding John’s gaze down to watch her.

“I see Joseph.”

“Do you know that you push your sins on others?” Joseph pushed, hand still stroking her jaw. He barreled on just as John opened his mouth in an attempt to defend himself. “That you showing her your wrath, choosing to control a situation with such a sin, only serves to make things worse.”

“I know Joseph.”

If she didn’t know this routine already she would’ve felt a wave of pity for the man in front of her who looked as if he was on the verge of tears. It was a damn act. One he had down to a science.

“I’m sorry.” John whispered, curling in on himself as Joseph ushered him forward with caring hands. Kind intentions written all over his character as he herded John to kneel in front of Rook. Urging John to follow the same ministrations he had just done.

John froze. Hands braced on her thighs, splayed wide and grip a little too tight as Joseph walked behind John. Leaning up against the wall to watch. To judge.

“Rook.” Hushed words in some stale attempt at a greeting. She raised an eyebrow, keeping an unwavering gaze on him. He leaned in close to her, brushing a lock of hair back around her ear. Lips pushing on her cheek, a disguise of affection granting him the ability to whisper something only they could hear. “Now how the fuck can I show niceties to someone who doesnt show it back? Does he expect me to love you when all I can see in your eyes is hatred?”

“John.” A reprimand as the kiss lingered for too long. An admonishment for the wrong sin. John just tipped his head playfully. Smiling at Joseph. “Too much?” He threw in a laugh at the end for good measure. It worked though, making her wonder if his family really was blind to how many layers of crazy their brother was or if they were in denial.

“Just a little. I’m not asking you to take her hand in marriage. Only for you to show her the kindness I know you have in your heart. The same kindness you show me and Jacob.”

Rook noted how Faith was left out of that little equation. That Joseph’s words made John go all starry eyed, hauling up some memory he had buried from so long ago. “Yes Joseph.” John pulled at her, cradling the back of her neck and making their foreheads bump.

“Good John.”

She cracked an eye open, seeing at the last moment how John smiled. A secretive grin that told her how deep his need for validity ran.

The creaking of the floorboards caused John to pull back. Eyes looking hazy as he gazed up at Joseph. Repeating their ritual as The older Seed kneeled to meet his brother. Rook averted her gaze. Feeling like an intruder upon seeing a softer side of John.

Joseph pressed a kiss to her forehead, showing the love he wanted John to repeat. “Treat her well brother.” A farewell as Joseph grabbed a pair of car keys hanging on an ornate set of hooks by the door and taking his leave.

“Now deputy,” she rolled her eyes, here we go again, “You know I don’t much care with him thinking highly of you when he tosses me to the side.”

Her mouth gaped wide at him. Searching his face for any signs of him lying. “He loves you John. Were you not sitting in on the same conversation I was?”

“He loves me when I do as he asks!”

“Yeah well no one's gonna love you if you act like a whiny brat. Are you really surprised?”

John was on her in an instant. Hands wrapping around her neck and squeezing. “You didn’t let me finish.” Words that were followed by a hash pinch to her windpipe. “He loves me when I do as he asks,” He swallowed roughly, “And he loves you no matter how much pain you bring. No matter how sinful you are. He doesn’t care that you are a sinner, that you want us dead and killed so many of us. He will always love you.” John pulled away, slapping her across the face. Causing her head to jerk to the side at the force of it. It was a red mark that would fade soon enough, nothing for him to worry about. “He’s my brother, we are family. He should love me no matter what I do. You aren’t blood! You don’t deserve his love, not when you can’t even appreciate him.”

He stormed off. Slamming his feet loudly on the staircase. Muttering words under his breath as he ascended. Leaving her sat in the darkness of his dining room in the fading light with apprehension more than confusion running through her veins with a stinging cheek and the imprint of his hand to her left.


	10. Date Night (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request:
> 
> “Prove it,” John whispered, eyes still sparkling with something she’s never seen before. “Here,” He was moving quickly, like he was scared she’d run away. He got up on his elbows, keeping one hand on her shoulder as he struggled to his knees in front of her. “Let me just—“
> 
> “John.” Rook interrupted. Reaching out to cup one of his cheeks. Catching his gaze and holding him there. Making his movements freeze. “Tell me what to do. I’m not going anywhere.”

**John**

John pulling her away from the comforts of her bed wasn’t unusual. Late night radio calls on a private channel just for the two of them meant answering what he wanted. Not that she had to, there were no threats in his words. Simple pleas of coming to see him. It was her choice to get dressed in the middle of the night to sneak her way into his house like some kind of intruder.

Sleeping beside the enemy was probably frowned upon by both sides of this fight. Going on a date with the enemy like said conflict didn't even exist...for right now she’d instead not think of the consequences involved in that transgression. Not when John was playing the gentleman for once. Pretending they were somewhat normal, making it seem okay that they weren't actively trying to tear each other's throats out.

It was a night worth remembering. With him looking happy for once, eyes alight with something mischievous as he led her along the bank of a river swimming with bliss.

That alone should’ve set her heart racing, but strangely enough, John was a man of his word. And this wasn’t an act. He cared about her, cared to the point where he asked her late one night in the darkness that swallowed them whole if she wanted to go on a date. It was out of character for Hope County, people don’t do romantic outings.

Yet she let herself be dragged out in the middle of the night to sit on the ground and just enjoy nature. It made quite a sight to see John pretend not to care that his coat was collecting leaves and dirt. Or to have him simply laugh it off when she pushed him flat on his back with a hand in the middle of his chest, and his styled hair got utterly ruined.

He was trying.

At this point, that’s all she could ask for. He was beyond broken, she probably couldn’t fix him, but he was doing his best. Risking everything for a moment like this. Where he could stare up at her with a background of stars surrounding her.

John’s hands fixed tightly to her waist when she tried to move away. Sighing lightly when she didn’t pull back from the hold she could’ve easily broken.

“You trust me?”

A question he asked every time she took a second to slip into his world and let her walls down.

“Yes.”

The answer she never hesitated to give the man who would take her pause as the opposite of what she wanted to say.

“Prove it,” John whispered, eyes still sparkling with something she’s never seen before. “Here,” He was moving quickly like he was scared she’d run away. He got up on his elbows, keeping one hand on her shoulder as he struggled to his knees in front of her. “Let me just—“

“John.” Rook interrupted. Reaching out to cup one of his cheeks. Catching his gaze and holding him there. Making his movements freeze. “Tell me what to do. I’m not going anywhere.”

He nodded slowly. Head staying tipped down slightly in consideration of what she said.

A second later his face lit up in a wry grin. “Lie back, like this.” She knew what he meant, where he wanted her, but she let him guide her. Let him keep his hands on her, something that seemed essential to him.

Soon he had pushed her down on her back with gentle touches. He was hovering above her, positions suddenly switched. Anxious eyes flicking over her as if just seeing her for the first time. Looking too much like a boy who’s never touched a girl before. Going slow when he rested his hands on her hips. Swallowing thickly and breathing in deep for three heartbeats.

“Close your eyes.”

Once again she didn’t hesitate. Just let her lids slam shut obediently. Wriggling her hips in anticipation. Grinding against his crotch. Not completely hard, but getting there.

John’s breath was tickling her neck. Moving in to kiss along her frigid skin. Sucking softly and reveling in the way she moaned. Leaning into the touch, she offered as she carded her fingers through his soft hair.

“You really trust me?” John questioned, something close to reverence in his voice. Using a tone that made her shudder beneath him as he popped the buttons open on her shirt.

“What does it look like?” Her lips tilted up at the sound of his small laugh he shared between them. Chucking into the crest of her breasts. Drawing blunt teeth over her newly exposed flesh just to watch her reaction. Wanting to see how she’d hold herself if her eyes would fly open or not. When they didn’t, and she remained plaint underneath him, he kept going.

Finally adding his hands to the mix as he gripped at the edges of her pants and yanked down. Cursing as he tore off her boots with a little too much force.

“This..” she heard him throat click harshly and distinctly recognized him snapping off the buttons to his vest, “This is okay right?” She wasn’t sure who he was asking. Whether the question was posed as an issue for consent or one dealing with sin.

Either way, she held her hand out, fingers wiggling to signal he should come closer. She was met with the press of his bare chest against hers. Beard scratching at the column of her throat. “This is perfectly fine John, I want this. I trust you.”

“I see that,” John mumbled. Tucking himself into her shoulder. Subtly grinding against her leg. “God is watching…” he reminded, pulling back and looking over her features, noting how she still had her eyes closed.

“Yes, and what he's about to witness is an act of love.”

“Yeah?” John’s voice cracked. Throat going tight around his words again.

“Of course.” Rook let her eyes blink open. Straining to make out his face in the darkness now that he was further from her, hands resting on her hips. “What? You don’t love me back?”

“I do!” John was moving in close. Littering her face with kisses, she couldn’t escape. Already moving to pull himself out of his jeans. Not stopping with his affection. “I always have, wrath.” Murmured with a smile. “So you’re ready? Finally ready to take my love?”

Rook resisted the urge to scoff at his phrasing. Simply nodded and pulled him in for another kiss. “Always.”

That spurred John on, caused his face to soften more than she’s ever seen. It would be a sweet moment if not for his hard cock brushing against her inner thigh and his panting breaths. It still made a pretty picture though. And she definitely wasn’t going to complain when he guided himself inside of her.

He breathed out a sigh akin to relief when his tip slipped past her entrance. He was twitching as he rocked forward, hands held on her waist and squeezing tight to mimic the way her walls were tightening around him.

His cheek was pressed firmly on her collarbone. He was puffing out short breaths, eyes tightly shut to focus. “God Rook.”

“I know.” She soothed, rubbing a knuckle along his jaw. Brushing through the stubble there and leading his head up for a kiss. “You gonna keep me waiting?”

The response was instant. “No!” John was frantic, quick to speed up his pace. Eyes always on her face, wanting to make her happy. To prove that he was worth it. He needed someone to see that. “God help me.” He muttered, hands circling her neck, thumbs feeling her pulse. “Lord have mercy.” Coming out as a whine.

“Doing alright John?” She dared to smile beneath him while she said it. Acting like she wasn’t getting rammed by him. And ram was the right word with how his thrusts were making her jolt forward.

“Fine deputy.” He rolled his hips the way a skilled man knew how. Finally dropping one of his hands to run over her engorged clit. Gasping when she clenched around him at the sudden touch. “Only making sure you’re just as wrecked as I am.”

Ah, there it was. The snarkiness that made her heart soar. Rook wrapped her arms around his neck. Lips kissing along his neck and ending with a sputtering gasp as he rubbed her clit with fierce fingers.

She came soon after. Back arching off the ground and up into him. Into his brutal motions and animalistic grunts.

John spilled into her with a low whine. Keening in his throat through clenched teeth. A moment later collapsing down on top of her with a great sigh. Shifting his hips just to hear her gasp.

“Asshole.” She smacked the back of his head, though it lacked any force.

“Yes,” he agreed, already seeming like he was about to fall asleep. “But you love it.”

**Jacob**

She leaned further back into him. Eyes struggling to adjust to the darkness that fell so quickly she had to cling to Jacob for her to lead her. The last thing she wanted was to fall off the edge of a steep cliff hidden by the shadows.

If she did end up tumbling to her demise, it'd be his fault. Dragging her out in seemingly the middle of nowhere, and for what?

He hadn’t told her. Had just let her know when and where to meet him. At the base of some mountains that was intimidating with how it loomed above them imposingly. If she had been alone, she wouldn’t have thought twice about the location, would have driven past it with a passing thought that if she attempted to climb such a thing shed surely die.

Jacob was a man who was in tuned to the forest around him. He didn’t think twice bringing her out here. And to be fair, it did offer a beautiful view. And not just of the mountains. She could see a fair portion of the Valley and the Henbane. Their respective monuments clear as day.

“Why don’t you have some flashy statue?”

Jacob snorted, settling in behind her and dragging her to his broad chest. Nuzzling down to press a kiss to her neck and scratch her skin with his untamed beard.

“Faith did it to impress Joseph, I don’t gotta do that to win his favor...and John.” He sighed, and though she couldn't look over her shoulder to see him, she could imagine the look of exasperation on his face as he mulled his thoughts over. Searching for the right words. “John...likes nice things. Besides,” He placed another light kiss on her skin, higher this time. “I’ve got a sword.”

“I’ve literally never seen a sword, Jacob.”

“It’s painted into the side of a mountain.”

“Color?”

“White.”

Rook tipped her head back on his collarbone with an annoyed grunt. “You’re so fucking boring Jacob.”

He sighed, hand falling on her thighs and rubbing in circular motions, making her squirm. “Yeah pup?”

“Mhm.” She yelped at the slap he gave her exposed thigh a second later before soothing it again with his palm. Squeezing at the flesh appreciatively. “Maybe it’s the old age.” Rook chided, whispering the words as she leaned forward as an attempt to escape his hearing.

Jacob was quick to react. Holding her tighter to his chest with a forearm under her chin. To think three months ago and this situation would only come if he were getting ready to kill her. Now though, he was chuckling darkly in her ear. Making her wriggle in his grasp as his blunt nails ran up into her shirt, over her stomach.

“Still bored.”

“I’ve had more fun with your brother.” Rook sighed, immediately feeling him tense behind her.

“That a fact?” He clapped a hand over her mouth, still blocking her windpipe, now tipping her head back so she could see him. “You’ve got quite the mouth on you huh?” He chuckled lowly. Keeping an arm over her throat but relinquishing the grip over her mouth, moving that hand over the swell of her breasts. Dipping into her shirt to give her flesh a brief squeeze. Running his index finger into yen cup of her bra to brush past her nipple.

“If you’re trying to change my opinion—“ he cut her off with a rough kiss. Lapping at the corner of her mouth before teasing her lip with his teeth. “It’s not working.” Took mumbled low under her breath when he pulled back minutely.

“No?” He laughed, it wasn’t sweet or playful. Not now when he was slotting into his role as an alpha so easily. His laugh was cold. “Get on your hands and knees soldier.” He shoved her away from his chest. Making her sprawl on her stomach.

She glanced over her shoulder at him. “Make me.” Her lips turned up, raising her hips slightly off the ground and wiggling her ass. “Show me how strong you are Jacob.”

There was a flash of something dangerous in his eyes when he came at her with grabby hands. Gripping onto her waist to wrangle her out of her pants and underwear. Tossing them to the side and chuckling when she moved back to grind on his clothed cock. Whining softly as her head dipped forward into the grass.

He held her still so he could pull himself out. Tapping his dick against her hip, smearing In the beads of cum that were swelling at the tip. Smoothing it into her skin with his hand a second later as he went to line himself up.

Jacob shoved inside her. Sucking in a breath at how she clenched around him immediately.

“C’mon.” Rook moved her hips in tandem with his thrusts. “Faster Jacob. Harder, be strong.” She was panting the words out, muffled into the dirt as she tipped her head to the side in an attempt to suck in air.

There was a soft curse before his hand pressed down on her middle back, keeping her pinned as he obeyed her words. Slapping their skin together in the dead of night, eyes focused on how his cock was slipping in and out of her cunt. Her juices covering him and making slick noises that had him snarling as pulses of heat ran through his stomach.

Draped himself over her. Forcing her down to the ground and moving to mumble in her ear. “You’re gonna cum like this. Just like this—“ rook whined awfully in her throat at his words. “Now shush pup. S’okay, you’re my strong soldier. You can cum with just my cock making you feel so fucking good.” He grunted, burying his head in her neck and biting there. “You’re gonna have to. Don’t have much of a choice.”

He smiled against her skin when she whimpered. It’d be a long, torturous night. Then again it was Jacob she was with, she didn’t have any other expectations.

**Joseph**

  
  


His hand on hers tightened so subtly, yet it made her bones creak. She understood though, there was panic behind those glasses he always wore. So much so that she wondered whether they were used as a defense mechanism in moments like this. Moments where he called her to his church with a trembling voice and chattering teeth.

Rook was fighting to capture his gaze. Going to stroke over his jaw and wrap an arm around his shoulder.

“I’m sorry.” He murmured behind his rosary covered palm, so quietly she almost missed his inane apology. “You deserve better, child, especially on a day like today.”

She winced from the implication of his words. Two weeks, not a momentous occasion on any normal person’s part, but Joseph intended to celebrate. Only a few days earlier he grabbed her by the hand with something close to awe on his face as he told her of his plans. “We’re not officially bound by marriage, but we are still...a couple?” It ended as a question. Ever confident Joseph seemed to fall to shambles around the fact that she was flocking towards him and looking to him as someone to date.

So yes, celebration was in order.

Now though, with him shaking in her arms out of fear, date night was the least of her worries.

“It’s fine—“”

“But it's really not Rook.” He ran his fingers through his hair, tugging out the elastic band with a sigh. “This night was supposed to be special. A...cataclysm of sorts.”

“Cataclysm?” The large vocabulary wasn’t anything new, that was just Joseph, she was more wondering what the hell he was getting at.

He hummed in response. Leaning into her touch and kissing at her neck. “Yes. I figured...tonight I’d finally get to…” his face screwed up, nose wrinkling as he searched for the words.

Rook drew his head up to her mouth. Not kissing him properly, just a subtle brush of their lips. It was so rare to see him struggle with what he wanted to say, same going for him falling apart in her arms with anxiety from the future and the visions that plagued his mind. It was driving her wild seeing him like that. “Talk to me, Joseph. I’m listening.”

“I know.” His face softened. Eyes never wavering from her own. “You’re good to me.” He bumped their foreheads together, briefly nudging their noses a second later. “I wanted this night, this time we have alone, to make this more official I suppose. I was meant to be with you, so surely it wouldn’t be a sin.”

Her brow hiked up. Watching him intently. Seeing the way his adam’s apple bobbed when he swallowed harshly. How there were beads of sweat making his hair curl and clinging to his bare chest.

“Oh.” She nodded. A simple jerk of her head as heat flooded her cheeks. “I get it.” She grabbed onto his shoulders, forcing him to lay back on the slim pew. Paying close attention to how his hips shimmied in an attempt to get comfortable.

“Stay there. The nights not over.” She soothed. Leaning up to stroke his cheek. “And it’s certainly not ruined. It’s gonna be okay.” She rubbed at the corners of his eyes with the pad of her thumb, catching tears before they dropped.

“I’ll fix it.” Saying it more for herself than him. Trying to prove her usefulness to him, that on his worst nights she could be there.

Rook tugged at his belt. Laying it on the ground with a light clink of metal on wood. A half a beat later and she was shimmying his jeans down his thighs. Pulling them off along with his shoes. His muscles were pulled tight all over his body. Fists clenched on top of his pronounced hip bones. Head thrown all the way back and teeth bared.

“Doing all right?” She leaned over him. Bracing one palm by his head, the other resting on his chest, feeling the thumping beat of his heart.

“Yes.” He voice wavered.

A sigh left her lips as she lowered herself, kissing him fully. Pouring ounces of love into that action. “I’m gonna do you right Joseph.” Rook didn’t give him much time to do anything, she merely cupped him through his underwear, squeezing him softly and making him suck in a sharp breath.

“There we go.” She cooed. Grabbing his legs to tear off his underwear and leave his feet planted on her shoulders. “Relax.” Her soft tone resonating through the church didn’t do much to make him go lax, but she did hear how his breathing slowed down. That his chest was evening out to an average pace instead of panicked inhales.

She reached forward to wrap a hand around his cock. Moving up slow to rub in his precum, thumb toying with his slit. Making him whine. “Rook?”

“Hm?” She moved her hand down, fast. Slender fingers easing against his flesh, nails just barely biting into the pink skin.

“I love you.”

Her eyes snapped closed as she took her free hand to wrap it around his ankle. Kissing the heated skin there. She was trembling almost as much as he was at this point. Way too worked up considering that he wasn’t even touching her. But seeing him falling apart, mouth finally falling open in a groan, it made her thighs grind together.

“Love you too.” She eased his legs around her hips, moving to kiss up again. Hand still pumping at his cock. Feeling a rush of cum flood over her hand, splashing across his stomach as he groaned low in his throat, taking a second to bite at her lip while she was near.

“Love you so damn much Joseph.”


	11. Sharing is Caring (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request:
> 
> “Yeah?” He angled his head down, low enough that she got the message and went to kiss him. Cupping one of his cheeks and running her thumb over his skin. “You’re excited? Nervous?”
> 
> Her cheeks warmed just at the thought of what he was about to do. It was something she couldn’t control, even after months of being tossed around between the Seeds. Luckily it always worked in her favor. Gave her some sort of charm that they all adored.

His eyes trailing over her made her squirm from where she sat on his plush bed. Rook was running her hands absentmindedly over the silk blankets, head tipped down to conceal her anger. She had to remind herself that this week she was with John, that being the baptist he was, the practical saint, he would have no qualms teaching her a lesson on wrath.

“You aren’t very talkative.” It almost sounded like an accusation. But she’s played this game before. Had done so for about two months now. She was getting to know him better. For survival purposes of course. She didn’t have much of a choice, so like he wanted, she rose her head up. Let her eyes shine as she tipped her head to the side. Mouth curling up, hiding behind a mask of niceties to keep him happy.

“Sorry John.” She has a feeling not so many ‘sinners’ apologize, or even thank the man. He gave himself away quickly by the way he smiled whenever she showed gratitude. “Got a lot on my mind I guess.” Rook shrugged, moving to stand when his brow dipped. Suspicious. Wondering if it was a small mention of her time with one of his brothers.

It wasn’t meant to be. Though he’d find meaning in the most useless of words she spoke, the most subtle gestures. It was like playing with a grenade.

“Besides, you never much cared about talking all those other times.” Rook stood in front of him, painfully aware of her nakedness. She placed her palm flat on his chest, fingers slipping into the open neck of his shirt to run across his sloth scar. “That’s not what I’m here for.”

God, she felt like a prostitute. And he made her feel like one with the way he used her week after week. Not as kind as Joseph but more affectionate than Jacob.

“Yeah?” He angled his head down, low enough that she got the message and went to kiss him. Cupping one of his cheeks and running her thumb over his skin. “You’re excited? Nervous?”

Her cheeks warmed just at the thought of what he was about to do. It was something she couldn’t control, even after months of being tossed around between the Seeds. Luckily it always worked in her favor. Gave her some sort of charm that they all adored.

“With you? Yes.” Half the time it didn’t even matter what she was saying yes to. It was like some damn keyword that made his heart beat just a little faster. It caused his pupils to dial down into pinpoints as he regarded her. His hands moving slowly to rid him of his clothes. Keeping their eyes locked. Making a shiver run down her spine with the spark that flickered between them.

John smoothed his hands over her shoulders, sliding down her arms to grip at her wrists, tugging them together and tying them with silk he seemingly produced from nowhere. At this point, she wouldn’t be surprised to learn he carried it around in his back pocket with him.

She couldn’t complain too much though, he wouldn’t let her. She’s seen him get angry before at her resistance. If she wanted not to have cuts littering her body, she’d keep her mouth shut. Had learned for his affinity for pain the hard way. With him being pissed but still expecting her to lie on his bed bare. Too angry to outright fuck her but needing to get some release. A knife did wonders for him. Call her crazy, but if she were going to have sex, she’d rather have John as less crazy as possible.

That’s why she went along with it so willingly week after week.

Besides. He was a skilled man at his craft. With rough hands pushing her back towards the bed. Keeping her pinned with his body bearing down on her as he tied her tangled up wrists to the headboard with skill that’d make a weaker woman scared. Not her. This was par for the course.

John grabbed her jaw, biting at the skin there. Soothing the marks with kisses as if that would ease the pain or stop the bruises from forming. His lips trailed down. Teasing at her throat before coming to her chest. He smiled up at, her catching her eyes. He drew back to squeeze at her thigh with one hand, creeping up to run a finger up her slit, other hand moving to tug at her nipple.

“John.” He paid her no mind. Simply hummed under his breath and kept his gaze between her spread legs. Still not sinking into her. Keeping his fingers, for the most part, to himself. “Hurry up.”

“I don’t know.” He leaned forward to kiss her sternum. “Not sure I’m in the mood really.”

Her muscles tensed. The last time he said that she was thrown in his bunker without much thought. And she’d rather be his toy than stay down there and listen to the screaming that never stopped.

“You wanna fuck off then?” Rook snapped.

“Easy there wrath,” John spoke clearly, tongue dragging over her inner thigh, tracing a long scar from the last time he made her atone. “Patience.”

Her head tipped to the side, eyes slamming shut and legs twitching around his head when his breath tickled her skin. Enough stimulation to make her squirm, hips searching for something else despite the hand he laid on her stomach.

John went torturously slow. And that’s how it was with him. Either a rough night or a long one. His moods varied.

Tonight he was feeling something else. Some need in him to push her on the bed, tie her up and make her beg for him. It could last for hours. And just that thought had her huffing out a heavy breath.

“What?” John asked, raising his head and acting like her sigh was a personal insult. He rested the side of his head on the meat of her thigh. Humming happily when he palmed at her breast. Pinching her nipple until they grew into perky nubs. “Tell me what you want?”

“For you to fuck me.” She whispered it into the bedsheets. Cheeks going aflame with something coiling in her gut that felt too much like shame.

“Really?” John drew back, tapping her legs as an indicator for her to spread them wider. “The one and only Deputy wants that? From me?” He laughed. Reaching behind him for something she couldn’t see. “Well, I’m flattered.” He flashed her a smile before pressing a kiss to her knee, bending in close to place another kiss to her skin, this time a little too close to where she was hot and wet.

“Now stay still. And don’t be afraid to call out for me dear. I’m here to take care of you.” He ended his sentence with a laugh. Nuzzling into her skin and pressing a vibrator between her folds. Going right for her clit, not wasting any time.

John didn’t bother hiding his amusement when her whole body tensed. Hips squirming, not exactly showing resistance, he hated that. Didn’t like it when she made it how obvious how much she didn’t want to be near him. So she resigned herself to wriggle around on the bedsheets, skin on her wrists chafing despite the smooth silk material holding them together.

His cheek was still on her inner thigh, placing kisses that were full of teeth as he twisted his wrist, making pleasure spark through her stomach as she cried out for the first time.

“Hm? Did we like that?” He was cooing at her. Mocking her with a tip of his head. “Rook.” He sang out her name as he fingers snaked up to press past her lips. Trapping her tongue between his fingers and yanking as much as her body would allow.

“Yes!” She yelped the words the best she could with his digits shoving further in her throat. Waiting until she gagged around him and her cunt clenched around nothing before taking his fingers away.

“Good.” His hand crawled down her body, pausing to tweak one of her nipples before twirling at her entrance. “You know how much I hate to disappoint you.”

Rook tossed her head back. Gritting her teeth and snarling as he pressed inside of her. Adding three fingers immediately. Not caring that her body was struggling with the stretch. “Bastard.”

“What was that?” The vibrator amped up, a reprimand along with the harsh thrusts from his fingers. Making such obscene noises.

“N-nothing.” Her swallow sounded amplified in the silence that followed.

“Not too sure it was nothing.” He mumbled into her skin. Raising his head to watch her head thrash on the bed as he applied more pressure to her aching clit. “Do we want to try again?” His fingers pulled out, coated with her slick and making her grunt in frustration. He climbed up her body, pressing his weight down on her and keeping the vibrator between her folds as he kissed her fiercely.

“John…”

“Wanna cum?” He smiled as he said it. Like the idea excited him enough to make him spill into her stomach right then and there.

“Yes.” Her eyes clicked with his. Grinding up into his touch. Whining when he palmed at her breast.

“Not tonight.” It wasn’t unexpected. He’s done it before, too many time for her to count. But the words still got to her when she was so close to the edge. It left her whimpering as she watched him grab his cock. Stroking himself to completion and letting his cum drip down his fingers and onto her skin.

It was a taunt and a way of claiming her at the same time. And she hated how much she loved it.

*****

It was challenging to leave John, he always made it difficult. He just had to make sure that all parties involved knew how unhappy he was with the situation. As if he was mad he had to share, even if his brothers had to deal with the same shit.

For the time being, she had to grin and bear it. Let him sling an arm over her shoulder the entire car ride up into the mountains until they reached Jacob’s compound. Where the man In question would be conveniently waiting for them to arrive. Clipboard held in a loose grip, pen twirling in his fingers showing a small reserve of impatience.

She knew by now to not bound out of the car to leave his death grip, not that she preferred Jacob, John just held her a little too close. Leaving last minute bruises in her skin that Jacob would have to deal with for the rest of the week. Rook could still recall when the cycle reset and she was tossed back over to John to tell him that even Joseph had seen her bruises when it was his turn. The smug bastard made sure to do that each week.

Sooner or later his hold on her would relinquish, and she’d slink over to Jacob. Standing a step or so behind him as he requested. Keeping her ears tuned out of the brotherly banter they exchanged that made her flinch when the topic gravitated towards her.

And so her week with the eldest would begin.

So much more different than her experience with John. They were like night and day. Changing each minute thing so it would cater to what he wanted from her. Survival tactics at its basic.

Jacob would haul her inside as quick as he could. Like he didn’t want her to be seen by anyone else. Never letting her roam or leave his confining office space. Her days were filled with him.

His bruising bites and the collar he wrapped firmly around her neck as he rammed into her over and over.

She always had some obscure hope that it’d be different each time she got carted over to Jacob.

Turns out he liked his little games. Seeing as the first thing he did was force her to the ground when his office door slammed shut. Moving in immediately to loop sturdy black leather around her throat. Slotting his fingers between the small gap of the collar, his knuckles pressing harshly on her windpipe.

He tugged her along, making her walk along the ground, scuffing her knees and getting choked before he collapsed down into his shitty office chair.

“Gonna be good for me today?” At the lack of her answer and just a simple huff when he pulled her closer between her legs, he sighed deeply, as if disappointed. “Fucking hope so Pup. Not in the mood for games.” And his voice was all the indication she needed that he wasn’t joking. Sometimes his teased her relentlessly, offering an opening for her to break the rules for him. Now wasn’t the time though, not when the tendons in his neck was jumping in tune with his raging heart and he was shoving her towards his cock with little regard for how her knees were getting bloody.

She took him with a wide mouth. Placing tentative hands on his thighs and slamming her eyes shut when he shoved her head down. Enough for her to choke and gag.

“Eyes on me.” He already sounded wrecked. Ready to spill down her throat. But he was a soldier, he had more self-control from that. So she complied. Smart.

“Good girl.” Jacob spread his leg wider, a silent command for her to crowd closer. Which she did. She curled into his body heat. She took him further until her windpipe was clogged with the taste of him.

She pulled back when the feel of his fingers moved to rub at her neck instead. Her arm came up to wipe at her mouth, at the saliva that we pooling out of her mouth. Her hand strayed up to hold his cock. Stroking him quickly, moving too slow might imply teasing. Teasing Jacob is how you get punished.

Like the good pup he claimed she was, Rook moved back in. Tongue running over his slit and sighing at the precum that dripped down her throat. She wrapped her lips around his tip, sucking softly, humming to send vibrations through his body that made his muscles tense.

“Fuck. There ya go.” He thrust up. Bucking his hips into her mouth and holding her there to use her as a toy.

He spilled down her throat. Keeping her head down completely as she coughed around him, struggling to breathe. When he did let her up, curling fingers in her collar, he hefted her up on his lap. Laughing cooly when she leaned into him. Sagging against his body plaintly.

“Look at you.” He smacked her ass softly, making her jolt. “Weak. And all mine.”

*****

Leaving Jacob’s compound for Joseph’s tiny island was always a blessing. After two weeks of the other Seeds siblings rough treatment, she finally had a moment to relax. To let her guard drop, even if it was minutely.

Joseph took care of her in a way she still had trouble processing. He made it easy to fall for him.

Even now, being pulled in for one last harsh kiss from Jacob and thrown into Joseph’s embrace, her body was singing from anticipation.

He was quick to coo over her. To click his tongue in disdain when he drew her into his bedroom and undressed her slowly to assess the damage. Her clothes were folded and placed in a pile to be washed later. For the meantime he laid the softest kisses she’s ever gotten on her bruised and reddened skin. Always apologize for his brother’s behavior.

He held her close, pressing their naked chests together one last time before scrubbing her down. Guiding her into his small bathroom and pulling both of them in his shower.

Joseph pulled out all the stops that made some part of her brain tell her he was husband material. That him kissing her and never hair through hands, that when he washed her hair and rubbed at her scalp with the hands of a God, that maybe she was lucky.

“Thank you.” She moaned. Tipping her head back against his collarbone, letting him pull her close by looping an arm across her waist.

“My pleasure.” She could head the smile in his voice, could imagine the slight tilt of his lips. Making her think that he genuinely believed she was coming around. And perhaps she was. Maybe this was becoming too routine and too comfy.

Fuck it.

That’s what she thought right then and every single week when she found herself being taken care of like a queen. There was a part of her that told her that this was his plan. To have his brothers go twelve rounds with her and have him swoop in to take care of her. It was working. He was wearing her down, making it so hard to fight him when everything was sore and he was washing her like a newborn.

“Look at you Child.” Joseph cooed, pressing right up behind her so he could be heard over the pitter patter of the shower. “My poor Rook. Do you have a need for me? Have any kind of want?”

She could say no, she’s done it before. He’s given her an out unlike his brothers...but what other time would she be shown any form of love and kindness like Joseph would give her? So she nodded, each time she gave him an answer that told him yes, she wanted him. Needed him even to balance out the pain his brothers inflicted her through. Because he did soft, he was slow and methodical every single time. It was the one constant in her life that she could count on.

And Joseph didn’t disappoint. He angled her hips up, gripping onto her thigh and raising it, holding her flesh in a careful hold. He exposed her in the shower, baring her still sensitive cunt to him. He had patience she wasn’t used to. Moving slowly as he invaded her space with lips on her neck as fair warning of what he was about to do. A silent way for him to get her to relax so he could push in with little resistance.

He shoved inside her. A low moan slipping free from his lips. One hand snaked around to her front. Grasping her breast and kneading it softly. Lightly pulling at a nipple and smiling against her neck when she whined for him.

“More.”

She knew by now that he wouldn’t give her more, not in the sense where she meant faster. He’d keep his languid pace and subtle rolls of his hips until she was coaxed closer to her edge.

“Joseph,” She reached behind her, rubbing at his waist, brushing along raised skin.

“I know child. Just finish for me.” His voice dropped an octave lower, making her walls clench around.

He continued slowly, dropping a hand from her waist to reach between her folds. Rubbing her clit with soft touches. It was always sweet with him. Pushing against the sensitive nub with ease and confidence that he carried no matter the situation. She came while rutting against his fingers, thrusting her hips forward and pressing her cheek onto the cold tiled wall. She squirmed when his hand didn’t immediately stop, he went until she clenched around him again and he could finish inside of her with a low grunt.

Rook melted into him. Accepted the way he pulled her along, out of the shower and into his bed. She stayed still when he curled into her side, she was barely living. She was painfully aware of this fact. And yet when the week was up, she knew she’d be ready to start the cycle over again.


	12. Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Some domestic halloween time
> 
> “Joseph, look...Christmas, Easter, I get that. But Halloween?”
> 
> “It’s happening Jacob. Try and stop us,” Joseph teased, an unfamiliar air of easiness hanging off him.

“Not happening.”

“Jacob—“

“Nope.” He shoved past John, shoulder bumping him in a way that sent his brother stumbling back, spine ramming into the kitchen table.

He was lucky John didn’t catch the smirk on his face when he heard his guttural noise, that was way too exaggerated mind you, that fell from his lips.

“We can't not celebrate.”

“Yeah,” Jacob turned on his heel sharply, making John slam into him with a scowl. “But you see, we can John. And since when did it become a tradition for this family? Christ, I swear you do this every year.” Jacob took a step forward, brow pulling down in aggravation. “Aren’t you busy? How the fuck do you not have any work to do where you can just forget about your responsibilities and carve pumpkins?”

“Leave him be Jacob,” Joseph called, knocking open the front door of the ranch with his hip. Easy lax smile on his face and arms full with things too festive for any sane person's liking.

“Oh, what the fuck.” Jacob’s defeated tone had John chuckling behind him, bounding forward like a child to help Joseph. Giving a curt nod to Faith who followed at his heels, small baskets filled with food held in her grasp.

“Joseph, look...Christmas, Easter, I get that. But Halloween?”

“It’s happening Jacob. Try and stop us,” Joseph teased, an unfamiliar air of easiness hanging off him.

“Look what we got!” Faith giggled a second later, high pitched lilting voice making Jacob cringe. Though John flocked towards her, nodding along eagerly as she emptied the contents of her baskets.

“If that’s pumpkins spice food and drinks glowing bright fucking orange over there I swear to God—“ Jacob warned, taking steps forward to lean over John’s shoulder. Piercing eyes meeting his in a deathly stare. “You wonder why I hate you, John, remember this.” He jabbed a finger down on the table, making the items on top shake. His words were harsh, seeping into the atmosphere. But his eyes gave him away.

Jacob sighed deeply, head tipped down as Faith started making…whatever the hell people made in October. His head turned, utter disappointment in his gaze that he swept over the ranch. Which was now in the process of being turned into some shitty Halloween themed party. A party for four…

“Joseph.”

He didn’t turn around from where he was crouched on the floor, lugging in large pumpkins.

“Joseph.”

“Jacob.” The middle child mumbled back, obvious smile in his voice as he avoided checking behind him. “Something wrong?”

Jacob crossed his arms over his chest, snapping at John when he brushed by him in a jog to grab at one of the pumpkins with an appreciative murmur to Joseph.

“I will smash those pumpkins.” He said it with such finality, going as far as to halfway lunge at John, simply jolting his leg forward in a mock tackle that almost made John drop the heavy fruit in his hands.

“Stop it!” John snapped back. “I’ll smash your head in. Do not touch them!”

“Brothers. It’s a night of peace.”

“No,” Jacob said slowly. Pivoting on his heel when Joseph walked by. “I think you’re getting your holidays mixed up.”

“Close enough.” Faith chirped, practically skipping as she doled out a steaming liquid. She approached Jacob with the confidence of someone who loved him like a brother, who knew that his annoyance was real, but his threats of harm were empty. She pushed the mug into his hands, reaching for his wrist and forcing his fingers to grab it.

“Drink Jacob.” She hummed. Leaning up on her tiptoes and tapping his cheek. Spinning around to steal a sit between her brothers.

“It’s orange.” The soldier deadpanned.

“It’s a pumpkin spice latte.” John pitched in. “Real cultured, y’know?”

“Didn’t ask John.” He tilted his mug side to side, hissing when some liquid spilled over the edge of the cup and onto his fingers.

“Come here,” Joseph said softly, eyes taking in the scene playing out before him. “Let’s just enjoy the night. A night where we are lucky enough to all be together, safe and happy.”

“Relatively happy.” Jacob corrected. But he was walking over to his family. A smile forming on tight lips despite himself. Because John was beaming, leaning on the table with his body jutting out, sipping from a drink he’d never even considered. And Joseph didn’t seem to hold the weight of the world on his shoulders at this moment with his non-guarded movements, pushing away his problems and thoughts filled with fire and death far away...and Jacob was ruining it wasn’t he? Turning a beautiful moment into something vile all because his own demons wouldn’t piss off only because it was Halloween.

Jacob took the knife John offered him when he was close enough. Lips tilting up when John gave him a triumphant gaze.

“Calm down ya little shit.” He slipped his mug on the table, sliding it to the other side while reaching up to run his fingers through John’s hair if not just to hear him squeal.

Jacob whistled softly, tugging up a chair and went to work. And for all the times he’s been wrist deep in blood...this was fucking disgusting. His hands were entirely covered in pumpkins guts.

“This is insane,” Jacob mumbled, head bent at an angle as he jabbed the knife through.

“You’re enjoying it.” John shot back.

And that gave Jacob pause. Made him freeze his hands and look up from his work to across the table. They were laughing, talking, teasing each other in a way they never had time for. So yeah, he was enjoying it.

But he had a reputation to uphold, didn’t he? That’s why his eyes strayed from the domestic scene to the pumpkin innards that laid next to him. In a single second, they were resting on the table and then they were decorating John quite nicely with an ample throw.

"Joseph!" His younger brother's voice came out in something close to a whine as he yelped. Stopping his movements and holding his arms out from his body, as if the sticky, stringy feeling was getting to be too much for him to handle in the span of a couple seconds.

When the only response he garnered was the slight laughing of his family, John raised the knife he held in his left hand at Jacob. Pointing the sharp tip in his direction. "You better fucking run Jacob." The threat came off significantly weaker when his hair was tangled with pumpkin innards.

"Don't worry John." Jacob smiled back at him, the first real smile of the night, hell maybe even the week; "I'll make sure to pay for your dry cleaning."

The little growl he gave off, lip curling up in contempt made Jacob chuckle as he set down his knife and leaned forward on the table. "No? Can you believe this Joseph?" All he got was a raise of Joseph's eyebrow, almost a warning not to poke their younger brother. Though he kept going as if no one else was in the room. "How bout I throw in some hair gel?"

"This coat cannot be thrown into a washing machine, neither can this vest for that matter!"

"That a no or...?"

"You're so dead." He was muttering the words, slamming down his knife with anger that didn't seem fake. "So dead Jacob."

In the next moment, John was pouncing at Jacob. Or trying to. Very much trying to. Though his slight frame and way shorter height had him grappling with someone who equated with a bear.

"Why do we even try?" Faith mumbled, crowding next to Joseph, whispering in his ear.

"Because we love them." Though the way Joseph said it was nowhere close to affection. He seemed nearly as defeated as Faith as he watched his siblings go at it. Wincing a second later when John was shoved back, toppling over a large container of cinnamon that spilled onto the floor, frowning when it was paid no mind and John jumped right back at Jacob.

Joseph pinched the bridge of his nose. "And this is why we can't have nice things."


	13. Immunity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request: Deputy immune to the bliss
> 
> Rook was not being careful.
> 
> She knew that going in. Skirting along the edge of the water, hand skipping past the cross hatched patterns of the large fence that encased Joseph’s Island. She could get through this alive. Take Joseph away from his flock and into the angry embrace of the resistance.

“I don’t think they know.” Rook smiled around her words. Laughing despite having been chased down by John’s best gunmen, weapons filled with bliss strong enough to force a bear to the ground.

Not her though. She was praising whatever God was on her side tonight.

“It’s still dangerous.” Nick murmured, apologizing immediately after seeing Rook wince when he yanked a fragment of a bullet out of her arm. Kim was hovering behind him, cautiously peering over his shoulder when he held up the metal shining green with the sparkly fumes of bliss. “I dunno, I wouldn’t let it be obvious. Putting yourself on the line like that…”

“I’m the only one who can do it!” She snapped, anger making her brow dip low. They were her friends, practically family. She adored the Ryes, and yet she felt no worries about yelling at them because they were just being illogical at this point.

“You’re not.” Kim admonished, making Rook really think she’d make a great mother when the time came. “We’ve dealt with the Seeds for a while. We’ve dealt with this bliss bullshit too. We know how to handle it without you risking your life.”

“Yeah.” Rook stood, snatching her jacket from where it was hanging over the arm of the couch and shrugging it on. Doing her best to hide her annoyance. “But imagine having no casualties, not needing to deal with someone becoming an angel from too much bliss.” She sighed, toeing on her shoes and making a beeline for the door. “Just saying…”

“Letting the Seeds know you can’t be affected by the bliss is a bad idea. It’d be another reason for them to track you down. Only with the added benefit with them poking and prodding at you like you’re a damn lab rat!” Nick’s nostrils flared as he spoke. The only thing holding him back from keeping the deputy under their watch being Kim’s hand on his bicep. “Just be careful.” He called before Rook slammed the door shut.

*****

Rook was not being careful.

She knew that going in. Skirting along the edge of the water, hand skipping past the cross hatched patterns of the large fence that encased Joseph’s very own island. Smiling with the knowledge that the bliss wasn’t doing a damn thing to her. That the sparkles crowding her vision were barely there, if at all.

She could get through this alive. Take Joseph away from his flock and into the angry embrace of the resistance. A plan she was surprised no one had even tried yet with how trusting he could be.

The fear he instilled in people must’ve ran deep. Though most of that lied in the drug he tossed around like he wasn’t apart of the rest of the people slowly ruining the eco system. The same drug that didn’t do shit to her.

When she arrived at the harbor, containing a small dock devoid of any boats, she crouched low. Disregarding the dew from the grass that clung to her pants and leaked into her shoes. They squished softly as she took careful steps, circling around to the front of the church. Eyes falling on the bright green bliss barrels that acted as decoration for the large expanse of land. One was already half cocked open, lid threatening to fall with the slightest gust of wind. The bliss was curling up into the air, swirling around and disappearing when it got high enough.

A few weeks ago and that would’ve scared her. Maybe it still should, maybe the sudden confidence she felt at knowing their biggest weapon would have zero effect on her was getting to be dangerous. It was making her think she was invincible, that taking on hoards of peggies was suddenly easy. And it might be, she just had to give it a try and hope the Seeds still wanted her alive.

Rook stepped out from behind cover easily, keeping careful watch of where everyone was stationed, facing away from her for the time being. There seemed to be less of them scattering the yard. It made her move faster, going to the large church doors, it’d be her best bet if she wanted to find Joseph. She circled around the corner of the building fast, feet dancing over rocks effortlessly as she reached for the door handles.

“Oh, look at you.”

She tightened her grasp around the handle. Muscles twitching to tug it open. Instead she craned her neck slightly over her shoulder. Checking one last time to see if anyone was watching them before locking eyes with the youngest sibling of the family. Their artificial sister.

“Still running place to place, armed fully as if expecting to be met with murder and warfare.” Faith skipped closer, a faint smile on her face as if she had Rook all figured out. “Yet we don’t want to hurt you. You force us to fight fire with fire. We really don’t want to harm you, and…” She hesitated, though Rook couldn’t tell if it was for show or not. “And maybe you finally see that.” Faith blinked once. Twice. Waiting for Rook to interject. When she didn’t the siren continued, only looking partly disappointed, “That’s why you’re here, sneaking around to avoid spilling any more blood than you already have, you want out help. You want to let us in.”

“Right.” Rook laughed gently, retracting her hand to rest at her hip, right where her gun laid below her shirt. “And I’m sure that’s just my pride getting in the way.” It was meant as a joke, some poor attempt at sarcasm now that she was caught. But Faith’s eyes lit up. She took quick, twirling steps forward until she was standing directly in front of Rook. Close enough that she could smell the bliss coming off her. Like it was embedded into the woman’s skin, clinging to her flowery dress and urging Rook to fall victim to her lies.

“Was that a confession deputy? Are you finally ready now?” She grabbed at Rook’s hands. Intertwining them with her own smaller ones.

“Isn’t that John’s job?”

“It is. And you can tell him yourself, great timing actually. It was fate, meant to be like The Father predicted.”

“Fate?” She leaned closer to Faith, raising an eyebrow and breathing in deep, eyes closing a moment later as she picked up in the minute details of how the bliss was trying to worm its way inside her head.

The sudden puff of powder in her face made her cough and sputter. Nose scrunching up in discomfort as the drug pushed into her body. Tickling the edges of her mind and threatening to drag her down like its done to so many in the past.

Something was different with her though, making the haze that she’s heard fall over everyone never even touch her. All she felt was a pain behind her eyes. But her mind was clear, hallucinations non existent. She couldn’t complain too much.

Rook stumbled back slightly, colliding with something hard that caught her around her shoulder. “You’ve gotten brass pup. Too damn confident, too fucking big for your shoes.” The deep baritone of such a recognizable voice set her on edge.

Since when did all the Seeds have enough time to hang out at the same spot and leave their regions? And why was she not informed of this, why wasn’t this prime chatter for resistance radios? 

She was blinking rapidly, shaking away the bliss in only a second. Her head tipped up to look at the soldier, noting how fucking smug he looked with her in his grasp. He not too gently grabbed at her jaw, leaning down slightly to check her eyes. Sucking in a whistle through his teeth.

He caught on quick, huh?

“Might wanna bring more bliss John”

“The whole place is infested with it, it’s in the air.” John called back from somewhere she was unable to see with how Jacob still kept her head tipped to his chest. “We don’t need her turning into an angel.”

Jacob made a noise of discontent in the back of his throat, angling her head down roughly for John to look at her when he was close enough. Which he apparently deemed right up in her personal space. Bending at his waist, coattails dragging in the dirt to peer into her eyes. There was a small frown pulling at his lips as he took in her clear gaze.

He stood, running a hand through his hair and glancing at Jacob before he waved for one of his faithful to run over.

“So what’s the verdict John?” Her back straightened when she spoke, standing tall. Making a show of confidence that was unlike anyone in the Seed’s presence.

He ignored her teasing. Taking a plucked bliss flower from the hands of a Peggie. It looked fresh, roots present at its base with clumps of dirt clinging on. “You tell me dep.” He tried for a smile that wavered when he got closer. Confusion on his face as he held the flower under her nose for her to breathe in.

Jacob’s grasp shifted from her shoulder to her neck. Making her bend into the aroma, and she didn’t struggle. She let him push her down until her nose met soft petals. “How do you feel?” John asked, nodding once for Jacob to pull her up so he could examine her eyes.

“Just peachy.” She dared to smile, adding teeth. Snarling with anger when he brushed at her jaw almost lovingly.

“Maybe the bliss isn’t strong enough…” He was more talking to himself than he was her.

John twirled the flower in his hands before tossing it to the ground with a flick of his wrist. “Either way I think this is something worth looking into. Maybe something Joseph would like to know about too, this is sure to confirm what he already told us about you.”

He didn’t let her get a word in edgewise before he was speaking again, coming closer to her and peeling her away from Jacob.

“Oh dep, Lord knows you’re special now. Another sign given to us.” John chuckled, head bending forward, close enough for his hair to brush along her nose and make her try to draw back. “Welcome to Eden’s Gate, Rook.”


	14. Discovery

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt Request:
> 
> He wasn’t calling out to her, wasn’t letting his brothers know there was an intruder on what she now knew was their land. He just raised his eyebrows at her, giving a subtle nod. Face falling back into a mask of serenity.
> 
> An option to come join them. Almost like a peace offering. A ceasefire considering they were at war.

The building currently standing imposingly in front of her rivaled Seed ranch. Hell, if she had the Heralds' phone numbers she’d send them pictures from every angle just to tick John off. Then again, the petty man would probably knock it down a few hours later just out of spite. Do a fly by with his fancy plane. 

And her causing demolition to such a beautiful cabin that was practically a mansion would be the greatest of sins. This would be her little secret. Maybe someplace she could call home without having to sleep with one eye open.

Rook walked up closer, skipping along the large rock path like a child. After all the bloodshed she's experienced, she deserved this moment. It was like her own slice of heaven.

The wood was pristine, not a sign of rot or disrepair. Splinters weren't catching in her fingers as she ran her hand along the side of the cabin, craning her neck up in reverence. She let out a low whistle as she rounded the corner. A small gasp slipping from her lips at what the backyard looked like.

Fucking cherry blossom trees. She didn’t know they grew so deep in Holland Valley, or that Montana even housed them. Yet she was lucky enough to see a whole bundle of them framing the area. Acting as a makeshift fence. A barrier to keep out prying eyes.

She slotted her gun back in its holster. Putting her guard down for the moment as she puttered along the grassy land. Freshly clipped with flowers framing a worn pathway. Imprints of feet and thousands of animals warping the dirt trail.

Her whole body tensed when she moved further down the pathway. Half crouching at the sound of splashing water. She picked up the pace, hoping for a waterfall, or even a couple of carefree kids going for a swim to beat the hot weather.

She rounded the corner, throwing herself in a thick thatch of bushes that hung twenty feet away from a pool. Her body stayed low to the ground, cheek pushed into the rough bark of a tree as she listened to the sound of voices. Trying to discern them from friend or foe.

“John If you splash water on me one more time—“

“Well if you actually got in the pool we wouldn’t be having this problem,” The youngest snapped back. Hands resting on the rim of the pool as he shouted over at Jacob, who was sitting down and very much not swimming. Though he was wearing a bathing suit, a tee shirt thrown over his chest.

Joseph’s feet were hanging in the water, jeans gone and replaced for black swim trunks that showed off scarred thighs. The edges of his lips were tilted up in a smile towards his brothers. The book held open in his hand momentarily forgotten about as they just...lived. Christ, he wasn't even brandishing their religious text that she couldn't escape no matter where she ran off to. It was just a novel, some normal book that made him and his family appear more human.

She didn’t move fast enough, was too enraptured by the scene playing out before her. Suddenly Joseph’s eyes shifted, whether on his own accord or because she stepped on one of the twigs littering the ground. Whatever the case, she was now trapped by his gaze. One that held fascination.

He wasn’t calling out to her, wasn’t letting his brothers know there was an intruder on what she now knew was their land. He just raised his eyebrows at her, giving a subtle nod. Face falling back into a mask of serenity.

An option to come join them. Almost like a peace offering. A ceasefire considering they were at war.

Joseph was someone she could somewhat trust. Between the three men in front of her, she’d much rather be locked in a room with the manic preacher of Hope County. But he wasn't alone, he had his brothers standing nearby and if she stepped out from the protection of the bushes she's taken refuge in they’d pounce on her. Jacob would probably body slam her to the floor and cart her over to John who had a handy supply of water at his disposal for drowning purposes.

She rose fully, meeting Joseph’s gaze and shaking her head. She was smarter than that. Quickly she turned on her heel, missing the disappointed frown he gave in her direction.

“Deputy. How about you come join us?”

Her back went ramrod straight. Panic bubbling over. That fucking snake. She was stupid to ever think he was giving her a choice. Of course he would call out to her. Of course.

“Dep?” That was John’s voice, confusion melting into his words. “I didn’t know you were one for trespassing dear.” He gave off a hearty laugh, swimming to the edge closest to her and hefting himself out with ease. Waving away Jacob’s comments that he was being stupid, reckless too.

“Ah, there you are deputy.”

She glanced over her shoulder, very pointedly not focusing on the speedo esque swimwear he was sporting that clung too tightly around his dick. 

“Feeling a little hot? Or were you looking for a place to spend the night--”

“Neither!” She snapped, turning on her heel and stalking closer out of anger. “Just went for a walk.” There was no need to defend herself with petty words, but John brought something out of her that made her mind go hazy as self-preservation left the building.

“A walk. A walk that led you right to our little home. I mean, you must’ve heard us, we were being quite noisy. And you came to investigate.”

“Your point?”

“This must be destiny.” He leaned in close to her, rocking on his heels and whispering conspiratorially like he was sharing some secret. And with the smile that he wore proudly he must think highly of himself, maybe of his prophet of a brother relaxing poolside behind him. “Come on,” He reached out towards her, intending to grab her upper arm. She was quick to backpedal. Yanking her arm away like she had been burnt.

He had the nerve to look offended at her action. Confused too, like they had never been anything but friends. “You’re leaving then? Why?" If she had more of a heart for a man who cut into people’s flesh, she might feel bad for how lost he sounded. "I’m not threatening you, I’m being civil, very fucking polite considering all you’ve put Eden’s Gate through.” His hands fell to his hips, fingers toying with the cloth covering him, hands itching to veer towards violence.

“I’m letting love in Rook.” He threw his arms wide in annoyance. “I can only do so much, you have to participate in this too!” He jabbed a tattooed finger in her face, backing her up against a tree. Not striking out against her, not yet. “If it weren’t for my brother's inclination for you, Jacob and I would’ve had you killed already. Show some gratitude at least.” John stomped off a second later, chest heaving and back muscles tense. Leaving her to wonder what the fuck just happened. Because out of all the encounters she’s had with the Seeds, that was the strangest.

Rook followed after him, taking careful steps out of the dense vegetation to see John seething in a chair next to Jacob. Head thrown back to reveal his neck, glasses tossed over his eyes carelessly with how they hung lopsided on his face. His legs were spread wide as he slouched over. The epitome of a spoiled child who heard the word no for the first time.

“What’d you do to my brother dep?”

Surprisingly she didn’t flinch when she met Jacob’s gaze. Though maybe it was because his eyes held amusement more than anything else.

“Jacob.” She hooked her thumbs in the shallow pockets of her jeans, meandering closer and huffing a light breath of air. “Honestly I’ve got no fucking idea.”

“Yeah pretend like you don’t know, that’s fine.” John hissed, finally righting himself in his chair.

“Go cool off or something John.”

“Cool off?” He was on his feet, pointedly not looking at Joseph who suddenly had gone paler than normal with a look of regret on his face. “I tried to invite you to swim, to just have fun and stop with your wrath, but I’m starting to think you can’t be helped.” He had backed her up to the edge of the pool. Skin turning blotchy red with anger.

“Sorry.” She tipped her lips up softly, hand moving to his exposed bicep in some form of faux sympathy. Rubbing up and down until his shoulders went lax. And that’s when her hold tightened, and she twirled on her heel. Pushing out forcefully to make him fall into the water below.

Her head swiveled around when she heard the sound of the chair Jacob was sitting on creak as he stood to stroll towards her. He towered over her, getting in her space and cocking an eyebrow. There was a hint of a smile on his face as he took in the scene his younger brother made floundering in the pool as if he never knew how to swim.

“Nice work.” He finally said, eyes catching hers.

“Yeah?” Rook took a step closer to him, hand looping around to press into his back. Feeling the sweat-stained material. “You hot too Jacob?” At the lack of an answer she recoiled. “You’re gonna hurt me if I push you.”

“Dunno. Try it.” The smile on his face became more prominent. Appearing fully as the thought crossed his mind.

“Ah.” She took careful steps behind him, out of his line of sight and letting herself look over at Joseph for the first time in a while. There wasn’t disappointment ringing around his face in the form of a scowl anymore. He had his head buried in the book he was reading, though his eyes were flicking up and down. Probably reading over the same line over and over again with how focused he was on his brothers and the sudden intruder that he invited over.

Rook shifted her gaze back over to Jacob. Strong and broad as he was, standing with legs close together and arms hanging low by his side. Off guard for once with muscles that weren’t at all tense below his grey shirt. It’d be easy for her to just...push him, right?

God, the satisfaction of shoving John in was totally expected. But getting Jacob wet, that’s a story her friends would adore if she managed to pull it off. It’d give them a good laugh for once when they were drunk off their asses.

She charged forward. Rushing at him and wrangling him around his waist, hoping to use the momentum to make him lose balance and tip over the edge.

Jacob didn’t even stumble. His feet locked into place as he reached over his shoulder. Having a reaction time she didn't anticipate a man of his age to possess even with his years in the army. He grabbed at her, tossing her in. Throwing her halfway into the pool to where she was suddenly plunged into eight feet of water.

“Are you trying to fucking kill me?!”

She distantly heard Joseph admonishing a soft warning of, “Language Rook,” before she was pounced on. Being dragged down by a very angry 5’10 man. She was sure the only thing that kept her from drowning in their family pool was Joseph. A constant savior to John’s attacks it would seem when she resurfaced and John paddled off quick to the edge, elbow keeping him afloat next to Joseph as he glared at her.

“This is the welcome I get Joseph?” Rook sputtered, coughing up water and snarling at the two brothers because Jacob wasn’t the one she wanted to get into a fight with considering he just chucked her like she was a bag of flour. “Control your brothers.”

Joseph merely smiled at her. Placing a bookmark in the middle of his novel and putting his paperback out of reach of the pool. He leaned forward, hand on John’s shoulder to calm his wrath. “I’m not their keepers.”

“Since when?” She snapped, puffing out a light breath as she struggled to stay above water. Chin dipping in and out as her legs grew weary from the repetitive motion. She ignored the annoyed look in John’s eyes and the concerned one in Joseph’s. This was a bunch of bullshit and she regretted everything leading up to this point.

“Need help dep?” Jacob asked softly, crouching down next to Joseph.

“You’re not in this conversation Jacob.”

“You were speaking about me, makes it my business.” He shrugged, standing to his full height with arms crossed. The man knew how to make his presence known, and he was well aware of that.

“Jesus Christ you’re all unbearable.” Rook groaned, tipping her head back and drenching her hair.

“Blasphemy, I’ll keep that In mind. Unless you want me to give you that tattoo now? You are here, It’d be convenient.”

“I can get her for ya. Drag her to shore if you really want John.” Jacob offered, gazing down at his brother as they shared an awful predatory grin between the two of them.

She wasn’t quick enough to paddle away, of course that was because she wasn’t anticipating Jacob doing a cannonball in the pool inches away from her and almost dragging her further down below. The initial shock made her hesitate long enough for him to grab at her, this time he did shove her under. Only to yank her up again, gasping and spitting up water. She was aware of how John was howling with laughter from her torment along with the scolding words falling from Joseph’s lips.

They wouldn’t kill her. Especially not when Joseph had them all under his command, reminding them of her importance. She’s heard it from Jacob himself, telling her that his brother wanted her alive. She’d just have to suffer until the wolf of a man above her had his fun with showing off his strength.

After the fourth time, he let her cling to him like a child. With her legs wrapped around his waist to avoid sinking to the bottom. She coughed, eyes blurred with water that she scrubbed at with the back of her hands.

“I’m gonna kill all of you.”

The threat didn’t do much seeing as how that warranted her a response of laughter and shared glances between the three of them.

“Sure ya will pup, sure ya will.” He ruffled her sopping wet hair before dunking her again. The sun was still high in the sky. They could do this for hours.

God, what had she been thinking?


	15. Protection

It was dangerous and stupid and she was pretty sure that running around 24/7 trying not to get gunned down was wearing on her sanity. Tugging at her mind until it was frayed and so beyond repair that she didn’t reconsider her decision.

Once the idea popped in her head after a close call that left her trembling in the woods, she didn’t question it. For the first time since she entered Hope County she was sure Joseph was right all along about her being here, it wasn’t a mistake. Since that idea pinging around her skull seemed like God was giving her a shove in the right direction. Nudging her along with the helpful reminder that it wasn’t only her life at risk here. That it may very well be possible to be a mother and a soldier, but she wasnt prioritizing correctly. And that might be the death of her and the baby swaddled up tight to fend off the mountain chill.

She was getting sloppy, slower too. Her mind wasn’t clear enough to be making the quick snapping decisions needed in a war.

The Seeds were the ones who actually seemed invested in the kid they’ve only heard whispers about. They never threatened her little girl. Hadn’t even used her child against her. John even appeared interested, face softening when Rook confirmed that, yes, she did have baby locked away somewhere safe. Joseph didn’t spout somebullshit about fate or God bringing him a wife and child to replace his lost family. And Jacob didn’t tease her, didn’t reprimand her or call her child the week infant that she was.

What she did hear regarding someone else’s thoughts on the matter about her dwindling safety situation, it came from a crackling radio transmission late at night when she was curled up on the forest floor thinking about what her next action should be in order to avoid getting a bullet to the head. Joseph’s soft voice was so light she had almost thought it was the bliss floating up off of the nearby river. But nope, her radio crackled violently with a clear message.

“I’m not sure if it’s your pride or fear that keeps you from letting me offer any kind of assistance I can, child.” A few stints of silence followed. A long enough pause to make her think that was all he had to say. Then he was talking again, making her stomach churn. “I’m not asking for your baby, I’d never tear a family apart. Not when I know too well what that can be like. And I’m not asking for you to run to me or my siblings in order to find someplace safe. But if you need anything, blankets, a crib, formula, a pacifier for whenever they need. I’m not sure how old they are…” another pause, though with the radio now pressed close to her ear because he was speaking so soft, she could hear his breathing. Heavy and sporadic before he went on. “Or maybe toys? Surely you don’t want to deprive your child. At least consider it, know I won’t hurt you if you come to me in need.”

That was two months ago. Fresh when the rumors sprouted around the county, flowing like wildfire, with the deputy being out of commission for so long because she had her own spawn running around. Her daughter was newly born at the time. Couldn’t even hold her head up. Things weren’t getting better. She was older, but not by much.

She hadn’t heard anything since that night. Had gotten the one call from Joseph and then nothing. Radio silence. It made her wonder if the offer was no longer open. Maybe the deal was gone, closed to her and her child. It was hard to stomach, because Dutch was dealing with Peggies left and right, battling to stay alive and keep the comms open for the resistance; he didn’t have time to watch her kid. Christ, no one could fit in time to protect her child.

She made the decision easy for everyone. Rook took that burden from everyone and ascended into the mountains in hopes of finding any cabins that were far enough off the grid to ensure semi safety.

Wherever she went, someone was ready to shoot her dead, lurking around the corner. And if Eden’s Gate didn’t kill them, then the lack of supplies would. 2 months ago she had all those necessities Joseph listed off in her ear in the dead of night. Not anymore though. Formula was gone and breastfeeding was tough when she couldn’t find a safe place to let her guard down, not to mention that her own body was run ragged, not nearly healthy enough to be lactating. The blanket swaddling her daughter was the same one she used when she was first born. It was ratty and torn, not doing much to help with the wind.

She was stuck. Not left with much of a choice.

Finding herself knocking on the doors of the church that Eden’s Gate had claimed as their own had been so much easier after those thoughts settled in. The wailing child in her arms swayed her more than any bullet ever had.

And maybe it was pride that stopped her in her tracks all those months ago. Because now she stood with hunched shoulders and a glint of hesitation in her eyes when the large doors swung open gracefully and Joseph appeared instantly, smiling in greeting. He wasn’t smug, nothing close to that. Such a feeling was beyond his reach. It was more pitying if anything. Seeing that look almost made her run if not for his grip on her arm. Gentle, sure. But there was something else there in his fingers that made her shudder. There was the power to kill, the power to stop her if her shoes even shifted in any direction that wasn’t forward into the sweltering heat of his church.

“You’re taking me up on my offer than? Looking for temporary solace? Or perhaps something more, maybe a home?” His head was tipped down, not bothering to mention his family was holed up in that forsaken church with him. He walked her inside with this knowledge and was asking her questions like he was unaware that her mind was frazzled and already jumping into high gear.

“It’s understandable. Only a matter of time.” Said so matter of factly that she shuddered. Though she didn’t dare blame it on how Joseph stepped away from her, stealing back his body heat when he joined his brothers and sister where they stood gathered at the front stage. “I knew you’d come.”

“Saw it in a vision?” Rook closed her eyes a second later at her own words. Stupid. So fucking stupid. Make fun of a man who was backed up by so many willing to slaughter anyone who even looked at his funny. “Sorry I shouldn’t—“

Joseph smiled tight in understanding as John laughed out a light, “It’s fine.” He tipped his blue glasses out of his face, angling them on his head, squashing his hair down in the process. “I think we can let that slide.” His eyes slipped down, away from her face and to the bundle in her arms.

John took careful steps towards her, passing his brother easily, bumping shoulders in the process, and glancing back at him, as if he could find an answer in Joseph’s eyes that this was a good idea.

“After all, you’re not wrong.” Once again taking a glance back at his brothers and sister. “He told us he knew you’d come eventually. And here you are.” His hands spread wide, standing in front of her now, fingers splayed, coming down slowly as not to spook her. Landing on her shoulders and squeezing once.

He focused on her face before slipping down for the second time. “This is her? Your child?” He smiled wide, a gentle chuckle leaving his lips. “She’s tiny.” He leaned in close, close enough for Rook to smell the cologne he was wearing along with the twinge of blood that must’ve followed him everywhere, embedded in his skin, running as deep as the sins cut into tender flesh.

It was like that the first time she mentioned she even had a kid, his whole demeanor changed. Being the youngest she imagined he had never had to care for anyone. It was always the other way around. She figured he lacked that ability, and yet he was softer around her baby, as if he had been rearing children all his life and this was just second nature.

“Her name?” Coming from Joseph who was standing closer to Jacob, a hand on the nape of his neck. “She’s a few months old no? I’m assuming you’ve named her.”

Rook nodded. Shifting on her feet, eyes watching the motion of John’s hands, how his fingers were twitching, bundled up near his chest. Wanting to touch. “She’s got a name, yeah.”

John’s gaze bounced up to her. Lips tipping into an encouraging smile, one she dared to believe was used to manipulate thousands before her. One hand of his finally found a home in the crook of her neck, the other parted the tattered blanket her daughter was swaddled in, revealing her face to him.

“It’s Alise. Her name’s Alise.”

That opened up something inside all the men that made her scared. She took in their facial expressions once the word slipped free of her lips before she could stop it. She walked into their den and showed a softer side of herself never meant to see the light of day. Rook tried to gauge how much danger she just put herself in.

As it turns out, not too much. Not nearly what she was expecting.

They took care of her. They were soft and gentle in a way she never thought possible.

They kept her safe, just like promised. Holed her up all the way in some desolate spot on the edge of Hope County, backed up with a mountain range. A tiny cabin, more akin to a shack, left for herself and her growing child. With the added condition of the all too frequent visits from one of the Seed brothers.

John, by far, would make the trek out to her the most. As if he wasn’t busy himself. He had confessions and baptisms that he spoke about as soon as he walked in the door. Shaking snowflakes off his jacket as it neared later in the year and he toed off his shoes, slick with slush and mud. “I can’t stay for long, I’m only here for a little while.” The reasons would change. He had to meet up with Jacob or Joseph, whether for business or familial reasons she didn’t care to ask just yet, or he had some innocent souls to lead into Eden’s Gate, or a resident’s house to visit whose homeowners weren’t ready to give up their land to some man proclaiming the end of the world. Whatever bullshit he fed to her that day never seemed to matter in the long run to him.

He’d stay for way too long each time, she could tell that was the case when every week, without fail, he’d practically jump at seeing the time and rush out the door with swift apologies tripping up his normally practiced tongue.

But when he was there, in the little bubble that was her new cabin life, it’s like the rest of the world melted away from him. He’d hover over her shoulder when Alise was in her arms, offering to help in any way she might let him. Eyes a constant beacon of hope for her one day trusting him.

One day she surprised them both with placing her child in his grasp. She didn’t want to take credit for changing him in putting such trust in him, but from the way Jacob spoke in the few times he was visiting, he’d thank her. Those weren’t his exact words, but it was implied.

“John speaks a lot about you. About your cub too.” She’d laugh at the nickname. As if her and her daughter were wolves, though she let it slide. He was offering too much help for her to anger him. He was the one to rock Alise to sleep when Rook was on the verge of a mental breakdown when listening to the crying tore at her mind. He’d warm her bottle and do a strange job of being caring with the extra blankets and jackets he bought the both of them. Provided John hadn’t already gotten for them first.

Rook brought it up to John; she found she wasn’t afraid of him as she once used to be. Not when he sat on the floor hunched over and cooing at Alise with a stuffed toy held in his hands.

His head tipped up at her at the question, eyes narrow and suspicious for a minute before sighing, muscles going lax. “Jacob raised Joseph and I. He took care of us ever since we were infants. He changed our diapers, fed us, bathed us. We survived because of him.” His eyes grew strong, a fire behind them as he nodded once in quick affirmation when his gaze pivoted to the floor. “Out of any of us, I believe Jacob would make the best father, he could do it, despite what he likes to think.” And that’s where John left the conversation before leaving, eyes lingering on her for a while longer before disappearing out the door.

Joseph came less than his two brothers. A man who directed a flock of hundreds was busy she guessed. Not like she was complaining, out of the three he was the one she was wary of most. She’s seen Jacob’s and John’s caring side, not beaten out of them completely from their youth, thank God.

Joseph had yet to win over her favor.

He was calm and cool, he would never strike out against her or her child. That’s not what her fear revolved around. It was more the fact that if anyone wanted to warp Alise’s frame of mind around their fucked up morals, it would be him. They all could try, but Joseph would be the one to succeed.

From a mile away anyone could see John and Jacob were bad news. That all they spoke were lies, anyway, it’d be hard to dispute such a claim once you've come into contact with them. Joseph was different. He was a snake. Hiding under bible verses and the Voice in his head. He spoke about morals he didn’t have and rules no Christian would adhere to. Joseph had the power to manipulate, he makes everything he does seem reasonable if you listen to him for long enough.

And that made her tremble every time he entered her home and sat by her side, a touch too close as he hovered over her shoulder. The same as John, but there was an aura around him that didn’t quite follow the youngest.

Her coldness didn’t deter him. She didn’t think anything could. Not when he preached to her how this new child was a sign from God, meant to be a figure head of the collapse and a paragon for hope and peace in Eden’s Gate. Rook kicked him out after that, not willing to let him go any further when she knew it was a topic weighing heavy on his mind. Alise couldn’t speak yet, she couldn’t understand the meaning of what Joseph was saying at the time, but that shit wasn’t going to stand, not when Rook had plans on being out of this shithole when Alise was old enough to run and recognize the danger around her. That, and after Jacob taught her to become a marksman like he so promised.

Each passing day was a step closer to leaving. She walked into this mess willingly, she could stroll right back out. And if Eden’s Gate fought back against such a thing, she had no qualms about shedding blood with her daughter standing beside her, making her a proud mother.


	16. Christmas Headcanon

**John-**

  * He has no good memories of Christmas, too young to remember the attempts Jacob made to make the holidays better, only really recalling time spent with the Duncan's. And in that house just the thought of receiving so many gifts on a sacred day was grounds for punishment. It’s almost some twisted form of PTSD that makes him nervous around Christmas, so it’s not his idea to celebrate in the way most people would call traditional
  * It is his idea to have a feast though. It’s the first thing that comes to mind when Rook brings up Christmas. Having good food prepared to stuff themselves full sounds like a treat for once. Not like he would cook it, no, that’d be wrong. He had chefs, and if he has to kidnap the best damn chef in Hope County then so be it.
  * Rook begs for a real tree, frowning when John shrugged and said he could order a fake one off the internet. Though it’s around the time when his men are pulling the large tree into his home that he starts getting excited.
  * He buys decorations by the bucket load, hanging ornaments up with festive music playing in the background.
  * This is the kind of thing he had always wished for when he was a child, so yes, he is acting like one all throughout this ordeal. Grabbing at Rook and bouncing on his feet when the tree is finished and the whole house smells of pine. He pulls them both on the sofa and is content to spend the days leading up to Christmas just like that, with them swapping stories, learning more about each other. Him exposing things that he never thought he’d tell her.
  * Oh boy, by the time Christmas day rolled around Rook’s excitement had turned into his own. Making him wake up at five in the morning shaking her awake.
  * The day is a world wind of activity, even after the presents are open he isn’t about to let her fall back asleep. He must have her try on the clothes he bought her, and he needs feedback on what she thinks of her presents. He doesn’t want to celebrate with them lying in bed next to one another, they can do that any day of the week. John needs to be up and about, not only to ward off the feeling of being slothful, but because the few bleak memories he has of Christmas was spent in his room, curled in bed before he woke just like a normal day. This has to feel special, so it needs to be different to stand out from all those bad memories.



**Jacob-**

  * Jacob always tried his best to make Christmas a magical time of year when his brothers were younger. It was his specialty, something he got good at. Making something out of the very little they had. So he’s no stranger to playing the caretaker, to actually waking up and wanting to make someone in his life smile.
  * He celebrates with small gifts to start off Rook’s day, tiny knick knacks and things he collected during the spare time he had to hunt. It makes it more personal that way, more intimate than he usually ever is.
  * The dinner they share Christmas night is, of course, freshly hunted by Jacob the previous night. It’s fresh and not prepared by him, because the man cannot cook to save his life. Even all the years on his own and taking care of his brothers didn’t fix that.
  * He lets Rook sleep in for once, a small gift she was bound to appreciate after adhering to his strict military schedule, it gives him time to settle his nerves too.
  * Jacob does not get a tree, if Rook were to convince him it’d be fake too. Too much of a mess and he’d rather not clean up pine needles or add watering a tree into his tight routine. He values cleanliness and a tree isn’t fit for his office.
  * Jacob can’t stay in his office all day, and on the off chance he does dedicate his whole day to Rook, they’d be going outside. Either to check on the Judges or tagging along with one of his hunting parties.



**Joseph-**

  * He prefers the quiet days. He wants a day spent where he isn’t running around tending to his flock or worrying about Eden Gate affairs. And Christmas seems like a perfect excuse for him to hide away in his home with Rook.
  * Despite not putting his followers first in his mind during Christmas, he does put Rook’s needs in front of his own. Intent on showing her a good time. Keeping her happy and warm tucked under his arm that day. Getting a slow start by waking up later, allowing them both to sleep in for once. He’d keep her in his arms until he felt himself grow weary of lying down, pulling her along with him to the showers.
  * It’s not often they can start the day together, so he takes his time. Exploring each others bodies with a stream of hot water running down their backs.
  * He lets his hair down for once, doesn’t throw on his glasses and dresses in a sweater with the same color scheme that he hands Rook.
  * The curtains are open just enough to give them the warmth of the sun as they sit around the tiny Christmas tree that was a gift from a member of his flock. It’s small, really tiny. Maybe three feet tall and lacking any ornaments. But for them it’s enough. Because Joseph views a good Christmas as the time spent with others, not the gifts or any decorations that are laid out. His lack of family in early years made him value those small things better than he ever could.




	17. Tease (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The deputy unintentionally blue balling the Seeds

“She’s gotta know.”

“Maybe she’s an oblivious fuck.”

“No.”

Jacob barked a laugh, lips quirked up as he glanced over to where John stood, eyes pouring out over a map he had on pinned on the wall. “And why is that not an option?”

“You haven’t met her, you haven’t seen our interactions, if I were any more overt I would have to pull her fucking pants down and beg.”

“And have you tried that?”

At the quiet silence that followed Jacob veered his eyes away from the paperwork he had on his desk. John’s back was facing him, he was shifting uneasily on his feet, hands crossed tight behind him. “You’re scaring me here John.”

He sighed, heavy and loud as he turned on his heel. “It crossed my mind. Yes.” He scowled when Jacob laughed again, tossing down his pen because there was no way he was getting work done with John moping around. “Joseph didn’t care for that idea.”

Jacob nodded, a hand propping up his chin, “Can’t imagine why Johnny.”

“Don’t patronize me!”

His lips tipped up, “Where’s your girl now?”

“Our girl,” John corrected softly, grabbing a chair on the other side of the desk, “Joseph said she’s ours.” He frowned when Jacob only waved him off with a shrug with a signal for him to just answer the question.

“Joseph is talking to her at the church. He said that maybe he can make sense of it all. Because I sure as hell can’t understand what I’m doing wrong. I was a perfect gentleman, I brought her into my bedroom after a very nice meal if I do say so myself, I even let her borrow my clothes to sleep in.”

Jacob grabbed at his pen, twirling it around his fingers as he listened, a smile stuck on his lips. “Yeah? It was romantic huh? And what’d you two do to cap off the night?”

John leaned forward, forearms resting on the wood of the desk as he went to grab Jacob’s arm, anger searing outward. “We slept.” He paused, letting those words sink in when Jacob huffed out a sound of amusement. “She thanked me for a great night, rolled over and fell asleep.”

“Did ya at least get a kiss goodnight?”

He stood fast, legs knocking the chair over on the floor with a loud thud. “I’m done with you. You’re not taking this seriously. You don’t understand my frustration, not when I used every suave move known to man.”

“Maybe you’re not her type.”

John laughed, moving to grab his trenchcoat that he left on Jacob’s bed. “And you are?”

“Or Joseph. Send her over if neither you or Joe can get through to her. I’ll show her a good time.”

“Fuck you Jacob.” He rolled the muscles in his neck, grabbing at the door handle. “But fine.”

*****

Joseph offered a smile, only partly listening to Rook’s well intentioned words of gratitude. She was extending her thanks to him and his brothers for being so nice to her in the past weeks. It would’ve been sweet if not for him being well aware for what her true purpose was in Hope County.

Standing by the side of him and his family. Though she seemed hell bent on keeping their relationship platonic, professional at best with her role as deputy. As she rambled on, a hand squeezing at Joseph’s bare arm, he could suddenly see why John had run to him with angry pleas on his lips.

The woman was already driving him mad and he had only spent an hour with her. He’d have to congratulate John’s self control if the events of the other night were true. To have such a soft woman lying in bed only a foot away, Joseph would be lying if he said that it would be easy to deny her. Even now, with her petting over him and leaning in close, it was hard not to persuade her with cloaked words that she was more to their family than a friend from the sheriff's department that would come in handy down the road if they found themselves on the wrong side of an accusation.

“Any way I can repay you Father, just ask.”

He coughed, turning away when he felt his cheeks burn just a little bit. “Anything? That’s generous of you.” He acknowledged softly, grabbing at her hand to stop their progress when her finger tips wandered too close to his nipple. “I have something in mind, something to solidify your loyalty.” He bowed his head, eyes suddenly tracing the floor, not wanting to look at her when just the thought of her agreeing made him want to test the boundaries of her self control. “A baptism, it would only take a minute.”

Rook was already nodding, lips curving up in a smile as she confirmed that, yes, she’d be more than happy to appease him, more than happy for him to lead her wherever he thought best.

Though in hindsight, maybe Joseph shouldn’t have been the one to do it. Perhaps he should have called John, or maybe it would’ve been a good idea if he had surrounded himself with his flock instead of making this a private affair between the two of them. Because it had been so long since he felt drawn to someone in the way he did with Rook.

He was always afraid God never meant to give him and his brothers someone to watch over them and keep them in check, now that she was here, he was fighting a multitude of sins. Reeling in his deepest desires when he dipped her below the surface of the water only for his eyes to be drawn to the way her dress--the one he insisted she wear--billowed out around her to expose her thighs.

It was truly a sight to behold.

But once again, he shouldn’t have placed himself in this position. Not when he guided her above the surface and she clung to him like a newborn. His forearm pressed flat between her breasts, the ones he could oh so clearly make out beneath the sheer fabric she wore. 

And he really could see _everything._

The stiff peaks of her nipples, poking out in tight, large buds. And the dip of cleavage his eyes tracked when her dress strap slipped down her shoulder, too damn close to revealing her left nipple.

Joseph shifted where he stood in the waist deep water, allowing her time to come to her senses with eyes still closed. That gentle motion had him come to the acute realization of just how hard he was. Not fully erect, but he was getting there. All it would take was for her to glance down and squint through the darkness of the water to make out the shadow of his curved dick in his jeans. His jeans that were already tight when his cock wasn’t straining to get free.

When her eyes fluttered open and her lips pulled in air he flinched under her gaze. A thin smile greeting her.

He pressed his thumb against her forehead, the same as he did before he pushed her under the water. A passage of rights into Eden’s Gate, a seal of approval from The Father himself.

There was a pause in the air before Joseph’s eyes fell again. Following beads of water disappearing between her breasts. In one smooth motion he grabbed her left strap and pulled it up on her shoulder. He squeezed the flesh beneath his hand and ignored the way she shivered.

“T-thank you.” Rook tipped her head down, maybe the first time he’s ever seen her unsure. Though he knew why, he was sure both of them were painfully aware of how exposed she was. “You’re more of a gentleman than most. Thank you.” She whispered the word before leaning in, stepping closer to press a kiss to his cheek.

A gentleman.

If she pressed into him just a little more she would be able to feel the hardness in his jeans, the way he wanted to not be that picture perfect man she claimed him to be.

God help him and his brothers. 

*****

She was all that John promised she would be. A pain in the ass despite the charisma she carried.

“A marksman huh?”

Jacob nodded, a grunt falling from his lips in confirmation to her words. He leaned further back on the headboard of his bed, legs falling open so he could see her better from where she sat on the opposite end. “Only the best for Eden’s Gate.”

He noticed how she at least had the decency to look impressed. Whether that was feigned or not, he wasn’t sure. She was leaning forward, too close to him to be friendly, a trait Joseph and John had told him about an hour before she arrived. Though that message was veiled with snide words coming from the youngest. “ _It doesn’t mean anything, she’s a damn tease.”_

Jacob was starting to wonder if she knew what she was doing. No way, not with how wide and innocent her eyes were. Not once dropping to the tight line where his dick curved in his jeans. Always honed in on his face, showing interest in the stupid war stories probably too gory for what his family expected him to speak about when luring her in. It had been too damn long since he had to woo someone. He wasn’t about to sweep her off his feet the way John had done.

 _Tried to do_. He hid a smile behind his hand, scratching through his bead. Seeing how her eyes followed his fingers lost in his facial hair. Lingering up to his face to take in the burns before moving down to his arms. Tracking the splotchy marks and never fully healed scabs.

“Do they hurt?” Spoken quietly, in a mere whisper. She was giving him the same rapt attention she had before, always so so eager to learn and please.

If she was truly impressed with his soldier status, ready to dole out sympathy from the burns and scars that lingered from his past, then he could definitely work with that. He was an old pro at finding people’s weaknesses. It was a habit he had picked up, a trait that kept him alive.

Jacob shrugged, drawing his hand up to chew at a loose hangnail on his thumb. There was a beat of silence before he reached over the edge of the bed to grab at something, spilling it onto his lap before answering. “Sometimes.” He could tell he caught her attention with his sudden movement, that she had scooted closer to him, positioning herself so she was almost sitting between his legs.

“Utility belt.” He murmured softly, soft enough that she was forced to lean closer to hear. Her hand pressed flat to his knee, holding herself up so she didn’t fall in his lap as she looked over the strap of leather he had spread out. “Got it from a friend back in Iraq. Miller.” Jacob paused, shifted where he sat as he tipped his head towards her. “A good man, couple years older than I was, acted like a mentor I guess. Wanted me to have something to remember him by, claimed it gave him good luck, kept him alive.”

She nodded once, eyes caught with something between awe and reverence. Maybe she wasn't faking being impressed. It’d be hard to act that well when her hands brushed across the knives held inside the belt with a smile curling her lips up. 

“Can I see it on you?”

 _Oh._ That’s how it was gonna be then?

Jacob chuckled lowly, a dark sound that made her pupils dilate when she pulled away, allowing him room to stand. “Course, mind helping me?”

She puffed out a heavy breath, squirming to get off the bed to follow him. Pausing when his hand pressed on her shoulder and he jerked his head to the floor. “You’re a tiny thing,” He tipped her chin up with a single finger, “You’d help better down there.”

If she saw anything sexual about being on her knees in front of him, eye level with his crotch, she definitely didn’t show it. Her eyes were curious, nothing more. Only waiting for instructions, he bit back the praise he was aching to give her if just to see how she’d respond. Wanting to be the one to break her in a way that his brothers couldn’t.

He dangled out the belt by the tips of his fingers, passing it off to her with arms crossed over his chest. He waited patiently until she shuffled forward on her knees, getting close enough to reach around his waist and slip it on him. Her teeth were sunk into her bottom lip in concentration.

“Like this?” She asked softly, cheek pressed into his stomach, knuckles brushing at the scarred expense of his lower back as she tightened it around him. 

“Exactly like that,” Jacob confirmed, a hand reaching down to brush over her head, not really ignoring how she was so damn close to the bulge in his jeans, large even when soft. And once again, if she knew how affected he was, ready to pin her down when her hand brushed over that area, she never showed it. Only blinked at him sweetly as she stood, rocking on her heels with a faint smile.

Jacob clenched his teeth, shaking his head as he placed his hands on his hips, “Guess John was right.”

“About?” Her head cocked to the side, confusion making her brow dip low.

“You really are an oblivious fuck.”

The wide eyed stare he got in return was all he really needed to send her out his office door, phone already in hand with John answering on the first ring with an exasperated “Well?” in form of hello.

“We stick with this one brother--all three of us--we’re gonna get a clinically bad case of blue balls.”

John’s laughter was the only response given, the kind of answer that he didn’t need to express verbally.

They’d put up with her until either they went sterile or they had to pin her down and tell her what they wanted.


	18. Envy Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How the Seeds would handle jealousy over Rook

**Jacob**

  * Surprisingly jealousy isn’t a new feeling for Jacob
  * Sure, not in the way that a relationship is concerned, but when he was younger it was the one thing he felt 50% of the time, besides anger. He saw what other kids had that he didn’t, the kind of life he couldn’t give provide his brothers with. So when he first felt that stab of jealousy towards Rook, he recognized it. 
  * Sorta had the attitude of ‘for fuck’s sake, not this again,’ almost like he was just done with it. He didn’t want to deal with having to feel jealous. Because for as long as he could store such feelings, envy turned into anger real quick.
  * He’d be mad at whoever was going after the deputy in the same way he was, but he’d also take that anger out on her.
  * More frequent radio calls, taunts of having her back to him at the press of a button. The usual, just him sounding more stressed.
  * Under all that anger and envy would be concern. Worried that she would slip through his fingers like every other good opportunity in his life. Not that he would admit that to anyone, even his brothers have a problem figuring out what’s wrong. But when he is around his family he does let his guard down and it is so obvious something is bothering him.
  * He just doesn’t have the gall to admit it. Love is weakness, makes your brain turn to mush in his eyes. Makes people stupid and ready to put themselves on the line.



“You really think you’re that special, huh deputy? Think you can run around doing whatever the fuck you want with...who is it you’re running around with now? I’ve been watching you closely for the past couple of weeks, and let me tell you something honey, they’re making you weaker. And here I was, foolishly believing I could build you up into something beautiful. I’m disappointed really. But you know what? I’ve always liked a challenge, and I’ve had this feeling lately that you could be my star pupil. I’ll see ya soon deputy, I’d hate to keep you waiting.”

**John**

  * John needs people to know what he owns. Hence the large YES sign overlooking the valley. Everything in that Valley is his, he has total ownership. Which of course includes the deputy. So first things first, people need to know.
  * Obviously a video broadcast is in order. He’s made productions before, talking about sin directed towards those he has marked. This time around it’d focus on having everyone who it sitting in front of a tv to understand that Rook belongs to him.
  * If anyone calls him out for his display of envy he is bound to react one of two ways. Either immediate anger and denial. With him getting close to their face and snarling out his words mixed with threats on how it wasn’t their job to point out people’s sin, that they weren’t God. Or he would freeze, in utter shock of what he was hearing. He’d stand there in contemplation with a look of disbelief and horror on his face. Honestly he never thought of it like that before, he was blinded in a way. He’d smile and thank whoever it was for helping him come to such a realization.
  * Not like any of that would help the situation. He’d still be jealous. And he couldn’t let things be, he needed to find a solution to fix that ugly feeling inside of him. Which means, of course, for the next order of business. Capturing the deputy. Bringing her into his bunker to lock her in one of the many cells he has meant for the people going through confessions and atonement.
  * That’s where she would stay for as long as he could manage to keep her there. After all, if she was down in his bunker than she couldn’t be with whoever had made him jealous in the first place. Problem solved.
  * Not that Joseph thought that way, but John was fine with the displeased words of his brother if it meant he could keep his eye on Rook until she came around and saw the light.



“I don’t like that look in your eyes dear. Makes me wonder...no, you can’t truly hate me. Not after I went through all the trouble of saving you from that...that scoundrel. That sinner who was driving you in a dangerous direction that I was beginning to fear not even someone like me could save you from. We don’t have to worry about them now though, because when the world goes up in smoke, I’ll be all you have left. And maybe you’ll remember how I saved you from damnation. For now, I’ll just have to be content with knowing you’re safe from the world, that will have to suffice until I can hold you in my arms like I was meant to.”

**Joseph**

  * Joseph prays the first time he feels even the slightest inkling of envy. He looks in the mirror at where that word is etched into his skin on his lower back and gets a loyal follower to underline it for him as a reminder.
  * He wasn’t above sin, no one was, but he was supposed to be a paragon for people to look up to. So he tries his hardest to nip that right in the bud before it spirals out of control.
  * Even takes the time to confess to Rook, right after the confession from John which didn’t seem to help. Besides from the occasion when she destroyed his statue, it’s really the first time since he’s personally contacted her via radio.
  * She lets him ramble for once, and for that, he is thankful. Glad she’s willing to listen to his insane speech until he is breathless
  * That fixes things for about a week.
  * Then he’s back to denying those awful feelings bubbling up inside him as he tries to lead the masses.
  * The envy he feels for whoever has Rook’s attention is eventually what makes him a messy leader with a loose set of morals.It has him sending out capture parties and hunters more often for her friends just to get her attention, to hold something above her head to make her realize that he’s serious.
  * Won’t admit the reason why he took her friends was because of his jealousy, adamantly denies it even when his own brothers ask out of concern.



“I’m feeling some kind of way about you Rook. It’d be enough to drive any man mad. That’s what you’re doing to me when you run around with that sinner who is amongst the few people who still oppose me. Are you aware of what you’re doing? Do you know how it’s tearing me up inside, that you are driving me closer to sin with each passing day? I don’t want to make threats towards you, that’d be below my character, but you should hear me when I tell you that we are approaching something very dangerous soon. If you don’t change your ways and whom you choose to spend your time around, you’ll be the one forcing my hand on whatever action I next commit.”


	19. Lactation Kink (NSFW)

**Jacob**

Jacob had her down on hands and knees before she could question what he was doing. It was too early for his bullshit, and she had half the mind to tell him that. She was cranky and sore all over, with swollen feet and a larger stomach growing wide with their kid.

She wasn’t in the mood to play games.

The glare she shot his way when he crouched down by her side told him as much. It made him chuckle low in his throat as he pet over her head and down her spine with a gentle touch.

“You know where I grew up Rook?”

She hummed, anger still in her eyes. She wanted a shower, maybe a cup of coffee and a chance to brush her teeth. She was starting to think she’s put up with this man for too long.

“Georgia.” He answered smoothly, ignoring her how uncomfortable she was as she shifted on the cold tile. “You knew that, lamb. I’m from the south, even had a chance to work on a farm with my brothers. Our first foster care family.” He laughed again, moving to sit Indian style, glancing behind him for a second before reaching out to grab something that he hid from her view. “They had a barn fulla animals we had to learn to take care of. I Burnt that bitch to the ground.”

“The point Jacob? I’m hoping you didn’t pull me outta bed at 5 in the morning for story time.”

He huffed, shoulders deflating like a petulant child. He bit out a sharp, “Fine,” before twisting to reveal what he had hidden from her. “You’ve been complaining for the past couple of days about those.” He nodded down to her breasts, their weight disguised by one of his shirts she had stolen the night before. “Fucking embarrassed. God only knows why.”

That made her shift to sit on her knees, an angry scowl painted on her lips. “I don’t care what you say Jake, It doesn’t feel normal to just start leaking. It’s gross. I don’t even need it.”

“Our pup will. That’s all for them.”

“They’re not here yet.” She was well aware of how childish she sounded. But they’ve had this conversation before. Right around the time she hid it from him because she didn’t want to see the disgust on his face.

That might’ve been the opposite of what happened, but there was still doubts. Thoughts that lingered about how attractive he found her after she ruined all his shirts when her breasts wouldn’t stop leaking.

Guess he intended to change that.

“If someone needed that milk now, would you be complaining?”

“No.”

“Then get your ass back over here.” Jacob grabbed at her hand, putting her back on hands and knees. His hands moved down to snatch at the hem of her shirt, tugging it over her head and exposing her body to the cool morning air.

His fingertips glided along her ribs, making her shiver when he moved up to tug at one of her nipples. “Been a while since I did this, honey. Give me a minute.” He eyes roved over her chest before he placed down a small metal pail over her breasts.

He was…

Was…

Rook jumped at the first touch of his fingers squeezing her nipples. Tugging lightly and stroking her flesh, coaxing out the milk her body was eager to give.

Jacob was good at it though, as much as she hated to admit that. He was like a proper farm hand, filling up the bucket with tiny droplets, not seeming bothered in the least when her milk got caught on his fingers.

“Look at that, sheep. So fucking good for me. You’re body knows what it wants to give me.” He drew his hands away, sticking two fingers in his mouth to lap up her milk. He let out a soft whistle, a smile making the corners of his lips pull up. “If I ever gets thirsty looks like I got the best goddamn source in all of Hope County. Aren't I a lucky man?”

\------

**John**

“Oh. Oh you like this don’t you?”

John blinked at her from where he sat at the edge of the bed. Watching her carefully with a guarded expression when his eyes dipped down to her bare chest. Tracking lower to her swollen stomach. “Like what?”

Rook laughed softly, shaking her head and gesturing for him to lie next to her where she sat with pillows stacked behind her. There was a teasing smile playing on her lips as he approached her cautiously. Almost like she just _knew._ As if she could see right through the coy little bullshit act he was putting on.

She’s seen the look he’s been giving her as she's grown bigger. Belly swelling with each passing month as the child inside her that they made was forming. He was into it. Always touching, eyes lingering whenever she was naked, because clothes were restraining and uncomfortable so late into her pregnancy.

The fact that her breasts started leaking milk a few days ago only seemed to add onto whatever feelings he kept locked up in his head.

“All of it.” She answered simply, dragging him in close with an arm thrown over his slim shoulders. He nestled into the crook of her neck, mouthing over the skin there as his hand moved to cup her breast. His thumb swiped back and forth over her nipple, intent on watching how she squirmed and hissed through her teeth when he pinched down roughly.

It only got a bead of milk out of her, her body wouldn’t really be producing anything until three months from now when they actually had a child to nourish.

But it was enough for John.

His cheeks were dusted pink, head tipped down to avoid her probing gaze. As if this newfound kink was just as a surprise to him as it was to her.

She heard his uneasy inhale as he pressed his index finger passed his lips. John’s mouth opened in a broken groan, revealing the almost translucent fluid on his tongue making its way down his throat.

“S-sorry.” His head slammed down on her chest a second later. Trying so hard to compose himself. Acting like nothing just happened.

“For what John?”

He laughed, tongue flicking out to brush right above her nipple. “All of it.” He parroted her words with a shy glance upward. Not bothering to hide his confusion when she laced her fingers at the nape of his neck to urge him lower. Lower until he got the idea to wrap his lips around her nipple in substitution for his finger.

He caught on quick. Sucked softly, relieving that awful buildup of pressure in her chest that had been steadily mounting over the past week. They were tender and full, needing something that she couldn’t figure out to make her less achy.

She supposed John would help her just fine.

\-------

**Joseph**

She had been in pain for the past week. Barely getting out of bed with how large her stomach had become. Making moving around a living hell. And her swollen feet weren't doing her any favors.

On days like those she was thankful Joseph was around. That he was the kind of husband to at least understand, to look in her eyes and see that this pregnancy was an utter misery for her no matter how much she wanted a child.

He’d sit at the end of the bed rubbing at her feet, digging his palms in to ease some of the tension there. Even if it wasn’t enough, the thought was there. It made breathing easier. Sleep came better too when she wasn’t sore all over.

She only wished he could stop her body from producing milk for a child who wasn’t even in need of it. It made her breasts tender and sore, had them swelling larger with the extra fluid.

It was a nightmare, and she didn’t expect Joseph to understand. Or to be able to help. The most he could offer would be comforting words. 

That’s why she spoke to Faith discreetly at the next sermon Joseph held. She was able to break away from him for a second to voice her concerns to Faith. Shaking her head animatedly at the suggestion of bliss--no telling what that could do to her kid--but instead steering her in the direction of something more normal.

A breast pump.

Something she fully intended to use in a few months time, but it wouldn’t hurt to do it now. To at least help alleviate the pain she was feeling.

That’s where Joseph found her, sitting on their bed with crossed legs and sans shirt. Pump held off to the side with her head bent and hands tangled in her hair. Because _fuck_ it wasn’t the most comfortable thing. Having her nipples tugged and yanked at just to squeeze out the meager amount of milk inside her.

“Rook?”

He walked forward with a dipped brow, moving to sit on the bed when his shoes were hastily removed. “You…you’re already producing milk?”

She cocked an eyebrow, sitting up as straight as she could manage. “You had a wife and kid before Joe, figured you’d expect this.”

He shrugged, eyes narrowed as he watched the tube pull fluids from her body. “I thought you would have told me.” He whispered it like he was hurt, like she was hiding it from him because she wanted it to be her little secret. He reached out, stroking just below her breasts soothingly. “Does it hurt?”

“Yes.” She snapped. “It fucking hurts.”

He tilted his head at her words. Slowly retracting his hand to remove his glasses and pull the pump off her breasts. He shushed her when she protested, a scowl of annoyance on her face, because it was actually helping. The pain was finally starting to ebb away, and he went to interrupt that process.

“God gives us everything for a reason. Especially those things in life that nature yields to us. Everything should be used to the fullest extent, don’t you think? It’d be sinful not to take what God leaves for us.”

Joseph’s hands wrapped around her waist. Somehow managing to shift her to sit between his legs. Her back pressed flat to his chest. Bare skin against bare skin.

He pressed kisses along her neck, fingers twirling around her nipples gently. Shifting whenever the response he got was anything close to pained. “We shouldn’t let anything go to waste, not when it is coming from such a divine source.” At his words he brought his milk coated fingers up to his lips. Lapping up the liquid with a low hum in his throat. “I trust you won’t let me catch you like this again Rook?”


	20. Until Death Do Us Part (1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Each member of the Seed family dying in the deputy's arms and she tries to comfort them

**John**

He was scared. She could see it in his eyes even if he was yet to admit it. Something about him not saying a word, only his labored breathing to thank her for the mess she’s caused, made this seem surreal. Like he wasn’t lying in the mud, back pressed against her chest when she pulled him in tight when he couldn’t finish his stupid monologue. When his tears interrupted him and the soft hiccups were too much to ignore.

And really, that made things so much worse. That he was willing to show his soft underbelly for once and was fine tipping his head back to look up at her with wide puppy dog eyes. She saw such fear in his gaze as she cradled him in her arms. It tore her apart--much in the same way John tore apart Hope County and her people.

He was a monster. She’d be crucified if the resistance could see her now. Comforting an animal like him who--rumor has it--has never been comforted a day in his life. Especially when he most needed it way back when.

But that voicemail. That fucking voicemail made her pause when she tossed him over her shoulder and walked the five miles to get far enough away from his men circling in the sky scouting for any sign of him. That voicemail that she wished she never had the curiosity to listen to during a mission to rescue Nick’s beloved family heirloom of a plan, it made her throw him down on the muddy ground and stay with him long after he screamed at her instead of stealing his key like she was meant to.

His anger was only a front to cover up that fear, she now realized.

Her hands were constantly moving, stuck in a repetitive pattern to stroke back his normally slicked hair, now ruined by the wind and dirt. And the blood.

There was a lot of that. The sticky fluid was coating her hands, mucking up his expensive clothes and her already torn ones. She’d have to throw them away after this was all over.

Rook coughed lowly to cover up the whine she almost released. Because that thought came on suddenly. A realization that he would die here in her arms and she would walk away. She would have to continue life after this, he’d never get that chance.

A blessing in disguise maybe.

Whether that be for his wrath ending, allowing for ample time for people’s wounds to finally start to heal. Or, if she played her cards right, this could bring about a peace of sorts. If Joseph was the forgiving type, and she was busy praying that he was--too busy to care about the sudden rain that started--maybe this war could stop.

She never wanted a death in the Seed family just to make this end. It shouldn’t have come to that.

Rook whispered that to John. Put a finger under his chin until her lips were by his ear so she could share her thoughts.

He laughed at her. Chuckled low in his throat and curled on his side, cheek now resting on her hip, breathing out hot air on her skin that made goosebumps form when he wrapped his arms around her waist. “It’s a little too late to start having regrets deputy. Wish you would’ve told me this weeks ago. Maybe I wouldn’t be dying.”

“Maybe.” She echoed, placing the flat of her palm on his back. Feeling him recoil when her fingers brushed around the edge of a bullet that she tore through him. She wasn’t sure back then, ten minutes ago when he ran from her, if she was aiming to kill or wound. She was used to the killing, used to gunning down hoards of his men. It almost came naturally to line him up in her sights and pull the trigger when she could zone in on his most vital organs.

“Sorry.”

“Wish you wouldn’t apologize.” His voice had dropped low. Losing consciousness fast. Making his words slurred like he was drunk.

It was her turn to laugh, as watery as it was. She did, she laughed and petted back his hair again. Comfort. She wanted to comfort this man. A man who has never felt such a warm, tingling sensation low in his stomach in years, she wanted that to be his last feelings. One of love and care.

“I love you John.”

He keened softly, a sound that made her flinch by the way it seemed to have ripped it’s way from his throat just to escape. “You don’t have t-to lie.”

“M’not.” She flipped him around on his back the best she could manage. Apologizing for irritating the wounds that were slowly killing him. Rook folded over herself to get closer to him, cupping his cheeks to lay a kiss on his forehead. When she pulled back, his eyes were wide, so full of innocence that it made her chest ache.

“I’m scared. I’m scared to die Rook. I don’t wanna figure out what comes after.”

So she kissed him again in lieu of answering something that she couldn’t. This time on his cheek. She kissed away his tears and rubbed at his temple to ease his fear.

She did that until he went limp in her arms, breathing out one last sigh against her lips that made her sob.

\------

**Jacob**

“I don’t fucking need your help.”

“I know.” She soothed, a hand ruffling his hair almost tenderly. “Everyone knows your the big bad wolf who owns these mountains.”

He laughed at that, though it quickly morphed into an awful coughing fit that had him choking as blood filled his mouth.

Internal bleeding then. Something he deduced on his own when she sat by his side and he glared at her. There wasn’t much either of them could do about that. The feeling of helplessness had her scrambling to do anything. Something that didn't involve yanking the key from around his neck and leaving him to die a slow death in solitude. That left her sitting by his side with an arm thrown over his shoulder. His face pressed into the crook of her neck, breath coming out ragged.

They were too fucking far from anyone to come in time, he had to know that, or else he’d be grabbing at the radio on his belt, or maybe he’d be attacking her if he saw himself living to see the sunrise.

Jacob Seed didn’t go down without a fight. Unless he didn’t see the need for one. Unless, in his eyes, it seemed utterly pointless. And that thought scared her more than it should considering she wasn’t the one dying.

They were alone, so far from civilization even in the sparse environment of Hope County. He had no one to comfort him but her, not his soldiers he spent years training or his family whom he loved more than life itself. He wasn’t going to admit it, but she could tell how much that was tearing him up inside.

If Jacob asked for one last wish before he died, she’d imagined it’d be selfless. That it’d be something for his brothers.

“You’re gonna have to tell ‘em Rook.”

“Hm?” She didn’t turn to look at him, kept her gaze on the starry sky around them, too scared to see the mess she made of someone so untouchable as him.

“My brothers. My sister. No one knows we’re out here, just you and me. I don’t need them getting caught up in trying to find me. Labeling me as missing when I’m just dead.” He coughed, body shuddering as he turned his head away from her skin to spit blood onto the rocky terrain. “Grieving will be easier for them without all the false hope.”

“Asking a lot there.”

His hand came around suddenly, came up from where it rested on the rock to reach around and grip at her waist. He squeezed her as much as he could manage with limp, broken fingers. “I’m askin’ for a fucking favor. Me. Jacob Seed, the Herald of Eden’s Gate, is asking something from you. Get off your high horse.”

“S-sorry.” Because there was still that edge of an authoritative note that made her tremble down to her very core. Even in death he still had a hold on her she couldn’t fathom.

“That’s a yes?”

She nodded once. This time turning her body to pull him in an awkward hug. Mostly awkward because Jacob was actually responding. He was gripping onto her, fingers digging into her shoulder blades and face pressed close to her throat. And from the way he was shaking, tiny tremors rocking his body, he was crying.

Scared maybe, or sorrowful. Just plain sad he could be there for his brothers.

He seemed to read her mind, knowing exactly where she was wandering off to in her head.

“You’re gonna kill my family, aren't you? In the span of months, you plan on tearing down everything we spent literal years building. And there’s no remorse.”

Rook didn’t bother to answer his question. She kept silent, rubbing her hand up and down his back like that could ever be enough of an apology for what she had to do.

“If you don’t want me to--”

“You gonna stop if I ask?”

“Might consider it. When I go and see them, when I break the news like you asked.”

She felt him nod. Shivering, crowding closer to her, sucking away her body heat.

“If you’re being that considerate,” He breathed out slow, slumping against her, dying too fast, organs shutting down all at once with nothing she could do to stop it. “Think you can give them a body to bury? Closure. Johnny’s already damaged, if it could ease his pain…” Jacob trailed off, eyes slipping closed when she pet at his hair.

“I will. I promise.”

From the way he laughed, the last thing she ever heard from him before he slipped away, he probably didn’t believe her. She’d do it though. It was the least she could do for someone who never got anything he wanted from life.

\------

**Faith**

She was soaking wet, bleeding into Rook’s own clothes until they were both properly saturated with the bliss tainted water.

It made her head feel more muddled than it already was, the flowers around her sparkling something fierce the longer she stayed around.

But when Faith reached out to her, cheek smeared with dirt and dress torn at the hem, inches away from the water with a shaking hand, ready to grab Rook’s, she almost stepped back. Something inside her did recoil, maybe more out of instinct than actual disgust or fear.

It pulled at her heart in a way it shouldn’t have. Perhaps that was only because of the sob story she heard before hand that made Rook decide closing the gap between them, to wrap Faith in a bear hug, would be a good idea. The bunker that held innocent souls was feet from her left, and she ignored that. So long as the bliss still infested her veins, it wasn’t going anywhere.

Playing the hero could wait. For now, she had someone who needed years of comfort to stop her tears. To make all those bad memories in her head fade away until she was relatively happy, content and greeted back into the fold of Hope County’s residents.

Rook couldn’t erase that hurt in a few minutes. 

Because she wasn’t a doctor, but she was sure that was all they had left at this point. Only minutes before Faith died from the wounds Rook inflicted upon her in what seemed like a fucking fever dream.

“I was a kid back then, didn’t know where to turn or where to go. Do you understand how he preys on those who are vulnerable? He gets in your head, makes you believe in him.”

Rook pulled Faith to the ground, falling to their knees to let her rest. “But he’s just a man, hm?”

“Not a messiah, or prophet, or God.” Faith finished softly. Exhaling with slumped shoulders. “You don’t realize that until it’s too late and he’s all you have, until suddenly he’s threatening you in a way a brother shouldn’t.”

In the way of comforting goes, Rook wasn’t doing too hot. Staying silent, save for how she rocked them back and forth, humming low under her breath. What was she supposed to say? The best option seemed to be just listening when Faith was venting, desperate to get her words out. Really it made her wonder when the last time someone had actually listened and heard what Rachel had to say. Rook could grant that to her.

“Threaten?” The words felt sour on her tongue, “Does he do that to John? Jacob?”

Faith chuckled, a dark sound so unlike her fairy persona. “No...no of course not. He sees them as equals. He loves them, would walk to the end of the world for them. I’m not blood, easily replaceable. And when I die, right here, no one will care. Not Joseph or his brothers, not the people of Eden’s Gate when they bring in the next Faith--the worst kept secret in Hope County--there will be another, I know that.”

“People will care.” It was lame and stupid and it made Rook cringe and wrap her arms tighter around Faith.

“You won’t.”

She couldn’t argue with that. Instead she pulled back from Faith, grabbed at her cheeks, careful not to touch the gash on her cheek still leaking with blood. “Tracy? She’ll mourn, despite not knowing you as Faith. She’ll mourn Rachel.” Her fingers tightened on Faith when she tried to jerk away, triggered from just hearing her name. “She’ll cry for what could have been if you let her rescue you instead of Joseph. She’ll cry for what you had to go through and the accomplishments that was just out of your reach. I promise you that Faith.”

Rook leaned forward, closing that gap once again, laying a kiss on her forehead, pushing her matted hair away from a tear stained face. 

She hated to admit that she was glad when Faith went limp against her. It meant less grief for Rook, it meant she didn’t have to explain how fucking angry Tracy actually was moments before she told her to go get Faith, to take her down because she infiltrated their ranks and murdered their own.  
Rachel didn't need to know. Not when it was Joseph who forced her hand to slaughter.

\-------

**Joseph**

To see him on his knees was a glorious sight to behold. A scene she’d want to spend time to bask in, to finally have this one moment, to capture it in her mind forever.

She went through hell making sure he was the one on the ground, clutching at his ribs like something was broken, and she wouldn’t be surprised if they really were with how her own people were treating him.

Giving harsh kicks to his torso with heavy boots and downswings with rusty weapons to his spine that made an awful noise.

“That’s enough!”

Rook had to yell that three more times before they backed off. Stepping away with sweat dripping down faces decorated with scowls, angry, hungry dogs wanting to snap at her for taking their chew toy away.

But he had enough, he was dying. She could see that from a mile away, she’s known death ever since she stepped into this county. So she could spot the life fading from his eyes when she crouched by his side and flipped him over on her back.

He crumpled at her feet with a grunt. Eyes slipping shut now that his glasses were long gone and the sun was shining bright behind her.

She almost felt sorry.

She might. Maybe that was what the strange tightness in her throat was from.

Rook raised a hand, waving away the men she entrusted to oversee him.

“Why Rook?”

“Those weren’t my orders.”

And that was the truth. She never told them to hurt him, to beat him to death in order to take out their anger. But really, what did she expect? After all this man did, of course people would want revenge, some sort of justice to balance out all that they’ve lost. It was human nature.

No, she never ordered them to do what they did to him, but she couldn’t say she was surprised. It was bound to happen eventually.

“Why me then? Why’d you come after me?”

Rook tipped her head to the side at that, staring at him with a startled gaze when he propped himself up on his elbows to be level with her eyes. “Cut the head off the snake Joseph. Did you expect me to run off to your brothers and sister? Take them out, then you?”

“I expected--” he coughed, low in his throat and breathy, spitting up blood onto her already dirtied jeans. He collapsed forward, cheek resting on her thigh. She felt each shuddering breath when he spoke again. “I expected you to let go of your wrath and join us. I never saw this. I saw something beautiful. Hope County full of color and thriving people after the Collapse. I saw a new man ready to take on my legacy when I grew old. Was that a lie Father?”

He was delirious, speaking to whoever he worshiped instead of her.

Her hand pat at his head, twirling her fingers until they got lost in his hair. “You could have done great things Joseph. If you were just a preacher with an urge to change the world,” Rook whistled low in her throat, moving her hand to cradle the back of his neck for him to lean into. “I image you could have made a difference for a lot of broken and lost people.” 

What she was saying without dangling it in-front of his face: You were wrong, you did this for nothing because now you’re dying and everything you did in your life was all useless.

She didn’t dare tell that to a man dying in her lap. She wasn't that cruel.

Instead she scratched at his head, eyes scanning the ground in front of her, zoning in on his glasses only inches away. Knocked off his face in whatever scuffle happened when her back was turned.

Rook moved slow, not shifting him too much, willing to grant him that in the very least as she tried to limit his pain. Which is why she placed those glasses on the bridge of his nose, lips quivering into something close to a smile when he made a pleased tone in the back of his throat.

He thanked her, God only knows what for, but he did. Whispered it out and brought up a hand to pull her in closer until he could lay a kiss to her forehead. She stayed bent like that, letting him press his scruffy cheek to hers like a cat.

For a moment she forgot who was supposed to be comforting who.

Until she was wiping at his tears and she was suddenly the one apologizing, listing off wrongdoings that she never thought she’d be capable of committing. It wasn’t black and white, Eden’s Gate wasn’t 100% bad or good, and neither was the resistance. She let him know this, hoped that would help him slip away a little bit easier.

Rook found out that even after the death of The Father, the last minute apology she delivered didn’t help her continue the warpath she had been on.


	21. Headcanons Hobbies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Headcanons about what the Seeds' hobbies are (Besides the obvious one's)

**Jacob**

  * Any activity that Jacob indulges in will mostly be solitary. He likes his space, enjoys reflecting, and to do that, he’s gotta be alone.
  * Once or twice when he was a younger, and when he had the rare chance, he played instruments. That love of music never fully disappeared, but there’s something so special to him about making something with his own hands. Especially something that is so beautiful, whether that’s coming from a guitar or piano, he loves it.
  * Hunting and fishing are obvious. But if anything that’d be for practical use. He feels as if it’s a skill that he’ll need. But most of all, really, even if he won’t admit it, he likes providing for people. He’s done it since he was a child, always caring for his brothers and making sure they were loved. It’s no different now. He enjoys hunting if only to bring something back for his brothers just to see how fucking proud they are.
  * You can’t tell me Jacob doesn’t jog. He needs exercise, something to keep him fit and his mind active. The man runs laps around his soldiers.
  * Jacob seems like a smart man, like he’s done his studies and probably read a book or two. That said, he doesn’t really like reading, unless it’s an intellectual book. Something about the world, or philosophy or anything that can add to what he knows. He just likes to learn new things, it’s been that way since he was a kid and back then he never had the chance to get an education.
  * He likes to tinker with things. Even if they aren’t necessarily broken. He doesn’t share the same ideals with his brothers about the dangers of technology, he loves new tech. Taking it apart just to figure out how to put it back together again, learning programming or just fixing an appliance.



**Joseph**

  * Hands down, Joseph has a thing for making tiny boats. Like those things that come in a thousand pieces and you need to squint to look into a glass bottle to make. It’s time consuming and takes patience and such a steady hand, but the end result is so worth it.
  * He also likes drawing. Mostly sketches, whether that be simple things that are around his house, or the nature around him, he makes rough drafts of things on any scratch of paper he can find, never coloring them or adding proper shading, just tucking them away inside his bedside table.
  * Joseph no doubt enjoys gardening. Getting down on his knees in the dirt to make something appear in the earth, something that came from Mother Nature herself, it’s breathtaking. Anything with color that can give the world around him a better appeal, he’s all for it.
  * Ever since Joseph got to Hope County and they first started construction, he found out how much he loved to build. He wasn’t much of a help at the start, never having done it before, but he got the hang of it, and now his house is such an ugly mess of furniture he created, at like, 2 in the morning. It makes John cringe whenever he visits. He’s just constantly asking Joseph if he can buy him an _actual_ chair, instead of the splintery death trap he has.



**John**

  * John has to like drawing. I imagine if he didn’t physically tattoo himself, he at least designed those tattoos. I mean, a guy like that isn’t about to walk into a shop and pick something out at random. He needs a game plan. And suddenly that transformed into him just doodling. Not real drawings or anything fancy, just tiny things that’s super small it’d only fit into the margin of some notebook paper.
  * I’ve got a feeling John’s a man who likes to swim. Not in the lake near his ranch or in any of the beautiful streams up in the mountains. He needs a pool, nicely warm and indoors. And once he’s got that, he’s good to go. It keeps him in shape and makes him feel free, it’s the one time he’s truly happy and can just let go and laugh.
  * John’s into sunbathing, not really a hobby, just something he does with his free time when he can find any. Even if it’s not on the beach, just give him a chair that can recline _alllll_ the way back, some suntan lotion and a martini and he’ll be there for hours. He can’t have a pale complexion in Hope County, not when all those people practically live outdoors with their woodsmen ways. He has one too many moles/freckles dotting his back and chest from the sun.
  * Following that artistic route, John definitely likes writing. It’s sparse and rarely occurs, but when it does, it’s early in the morning before the sun has risen and it just comes pouring out. Then he hits a dry spell for the next year until the cycle repeats.



**Faith**

  * Not really a hobby, but Faith definitely spends way too much time trying to learn a foreign language. She started out slow with French and Spanish, but she took it up a notch. She loved how different languages sounded, they were all so beautiful. Soon she’s speaking Mandarin, Latin, Chinese, you name it and she’s at least given it a try. 
  * Faith cooks, she had to learn when everyone in her life kicked her to the curb. Now she kinda wants to gloat about it since no one in the Seed family can make a meal to save their life. She likes the attention she gets for it.




	22. Nightmares

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Each Seed brother having a night terror and Rook comforts them, and one night where they comfort her

**John**

John didn’t have a lot to be scared of. Not when he ruled with terror veiled behind a dazzling smile. He had money and power, something that put him on top. So really, when Rook walked into his life, what was there for her to protect him from?

She almost felt useless. Or greedy, never being able to help him in return for the grandeur of a life he gifted her with, save for cooking him meals better than burnt pizza.

But when she wanted him to need her, she never meant like this. In an instant she decided she didn’t like to see him helpless. Even while asleep he looked vulnerable.

And if he wasn’t whimpering, or kicking his legs out in fear, she would have taken a moment to wonder what it was that haunted him in his dreams. What demons couldn’t he shake that held him in a choke hold?

Whatever it was, it reduced him down into a shriveling mess of a man who almost knocked her on her ass when she shook him awake and he jumped five feet in the air.

An apology was on the tip of her tongue, ready to soothe him because he looked seconds away from a panic attack. Then he was crying, absolutely sobbing, his shoulders shaking, unseeing to where she sat on the edge of the bed.

He was curling in on himself, hiding his face in cupped palms. Crying and hiccuping, scaring her when he couldn’t catch his breath.

“John?”

He startled at her voice, reeling back with pink cheeks, almost embarrassed being caught with flushed pink cheeks and tears streaming down his face.

“You’re okay, you’re awake.” She mumbled when he turned away from her, angling his body to the side so she could no longer see his eyes. “Sweetheart, look at me.” The pet name did the trick, it made a shudder run through his body, had him shuffling slowly until she reached out to wrangle him closer.

He ended up with his head in her lap, nose nestled into her hip, taking calming breaths she guided him through with a hand smoothing through his hair.

She bent to lay a kiss to his cheek, watching his eyelids flutter at the contact, “Would a shower help?” Asked only because he was shaking like he was cold, even despite the sheen of sweat coating his skin.

But he shook his head violently, like the very thought was painful to imagine.

“Wanna talk about it?”

He whined, a sound that was high pitched and so unlike the confident man she fell in love with. “What’s there to talk about? My feelings? Just how broken I am? What good would that do me, reliving the past like that?”

His legs had been pulled up to his chest, one hand hiding the lower half of his face, the other gripping her knee. Tightening to a painful degree as he spoke.

“Dunno.” And she really didn’t. She didn’t have any answers for him, nor did she know how to comfort a man whose past made him so utterly damaged that he beared physical and mental scars. The kind of scars that would heal with time if he let them. So long as he could let go.

That wasn’t possible when those memories followed him into his dreams.

*****

**Jacob**

He laughed in her face when she asked to sleep in the same bed as him. It was something to mask the insecurities he held tight to his chest. A way to make her take back the question she posed, telling her so subtly to walk away and let him continue to live out their lives in separate bedrooms where she wouldn’t be able to see what she was witnessing now.

She woke her up to him thrashing. A scream pulling free from his lips that sounded like a wounded animal set on fire. It was heart wrenching and terrifying all at once.

In a moment she was thrown underneath him, he wasn’t awake, wasn’t seeing straight either. He had a hand on her windpipe, closing off her airway with a force meant to kill. He was cursing under his breath, half asleep, not fully aware

When he came to, as he realized her struggled cut off screams were coming from the woman he loved, he stopped all at once. Like someone shutting off a machine. His eyes widened suddenly, and he was gone. Rolling off and falling to the floor with a thud that must’ve hurt his knees.

She wanted to call out to him, to at least touch him. But he was standing on unsteady feet before she could even think of what to say. He stumbled away, a hand raking through his hair with a grimace painting his face.

“You just couldn’t listen, could you?”

"Jac--”

“You had to be this close to me, you just really wanted to sleep in the same bed as me.”

“You should have told me.”

He scoffed, “Yeah? Tell you of my fucking nightmares like this is some therapy session? Is that want you want to hear? The things that I see, honey…” he let out a low whistle, a cynical smile lifting his lips up. “It’d fuck you up too.”

“I can help.”

“You can leave.”

Her heart dropped. It was like she couldn’t process his words or the situation he was forcing her into.

“You--ah, Jacob.” She was moving slowly, climbing off the bed to approach him with raised palms. “You don’t mean that.”

His back was facing her, hands laying on his desk with his head bent. “I do. Leave Rook.”

She took a step forward, eyes darting towards the door. He couldn’t kick her out of his life like that. As if they didn’t have something, like he didn’t say he loved her three nights prior to this mess. She finally did reach out, a hand coming to rest on his bare shoulder.

“Fucking leave!” He swirled on her fast, looking all in the world like he was moments away from slapping the shit out of her. Instead he breathed in deep, chest expanding as his head dipped towards the floor again. “Just go Rook.”

*****

**Joseph**

Nightmare was too soft of a word. It didn’t do justice to whatever it was Joseph was seeing behind closed lids.

Night terror would fit the bill.

It would surely explain the heaving breaths he was taking, as well as how restless he seemed to be. Tossing around on the mattress well into three in the morning, whining through clenched teeth.

The sound broke her heart. And if he didn’t wake himself up with a sharp gasp a second later, she would have done it for him. He sounded so fucking broken, and when he woke, It didn’t get any better.

He wasn’t outright crying, that just wasn’t him, but it’s not like he was unaffected. She could tell that from a simple look in his eyes. As if he wasn’t all the way there, focused still on whatever he dreamt about and not her presence beside him.

She had a hand cupping his jaw when he didn’t respond to his name. That only proved to make him cringe away, dangerously close to falling off the bed with how he scuttled away from her.

“Joe?”

He didn’t hear her, his breathing picked up, eyes closed tight with knees drawn to his chest where he sat. He was sweating, shaking, heat clinging to his skin. The noises that came out of his tightly pressed lips made her reach forward again, fingers going soft when she trailed over his ribs.

“Easy now.” He let her pull him close to press a kiss to his jaw until he stopped shaking and he finally registered who was holding him. “You’re fine.”

He whispered something slurred from sleep, something sounding like ‘no.’

Rook wanted to ask what was wrong, she wanted to prod and push his thoughts until it all came spilling out between them. She didn’t need to. He spoke first.

“You think that after all those years, I’d forget what happened. I heard that--that sometimes trauma makes people forget. Not me, I couldn’t be that lucky, hm Rook? I keep seeing it, It’s like it’s real, like it’s still going on today. All that abuse.”

He shifted in her arms, moving so they could stare each other in the eyes. He leaned in close, close enough so she could see the imperfections on his skin.

“It’s as if I’m a little boy again and not a man of forty. Leading the masses and so far removed from that past life.”

She didn’t have to ask what he was talking about, there was no need. Not when he freely told her about his childhood, sharing the neglect mingled in with the neglect him and his brothers faced. She just didn’t know it ran this deep.

“It’ll be okay.” Weak. Weak words to make his pounding heart slow down.

“Will it? You don’t really think I’ll stop seeing those things. That suddenly I won’t remember how John screamed or how Jacob always trudged back into our room bloody. It really won’t be okay.”

*****

**Rook**

She had done terrible things, committed atrocious acts that should never be brought to life. She just didn’t want anyone to know how much it all affected her. That her new life in Hope County was some big mistake she wanted to run away from.

Now someone knew though. Three someone's in fact. People who were the sole cause for the flashing images playing in her mind. The ones that haunted her, that had her screaming out to men aiming guns who weren't really there.

When a sideways punch--not too coordinated from how she was still groggy--landed on Joseph’s jaw, she jolted fully awake. She heard him let out a rough grunt, and suddenly he was holding her arm down. Stopping her from thrashing, that only made panic rise in her chest. Had her kicking her legs, landing it somewhere soft and fleshy.

Then the lights were flicked on. Making the world burn an orange color before she could open her eyes. When she did, she saw Jacob looming above her, a fist curled in the bedsheets beside her head, another hovering next to her cheek, almost touching.

Just like that she was flailing again. Breaking free of Joseph’s grasp and scrambling to sit up, to push Jacob away with hands on his chest until he fell back. Only because he saw the sheer terror on her face.

“Rook.”

She was shaking her head from side to side, so cold all of a sudden. Despite John’s presence to her right, hovering until he made the decision to wrap his arms around her. Trying to soothe her cries. “Shh.” He ran a hand over her hair like she was a child. Pressing a kiss to her forehead a second later, then another to her lips.

Joseph was at her feet, running his hands up and down her bare legs. Coaxing warmth into her body when goosebumps began to form. “It’s only us, Rook.”

She nodded sporadically. Like she was trying to convince herself. She pressed closer into John, breathing in his scent with her head pressed to his chest. Her arm snaked out to grab at Jacob. Holding tight to his bicep with her nails digging into his skin.

“Sorry. Go back to sleep, just--”

“You think we can do that?” Jacob asked, shaking his head in disbelief. “We’re not stupid, sweetheart. Heard you calling out for mercy. Who do you think is gonna hurt you?”

Rook buried her head deeper in John’s chest, focusing solely on how Joseph kept rubbing up and down, focusing on Jacob’s scarred arm. “I’m a fucking monster. Guess I should be scared God is gonna hurt me.” She laughed wetly, looking up to catch Joseph’s eyes. “He’s gonna smite me for my sins, for my wrath and all the damage I wrought.”

“You did what you had to. Everything you did was done because you thought it was right.” John’s words sounded hollow to her ears.

“Sure John. Sure.” She glanced between Joseph and Jacob. “You two don’t believe that.”

Jacob leaned forward, kissing her instead of answering properly. “We do, Rook. You gotta trust that. No one blames you.”

She struggled out of John’s grasp, rolling onto her side and ignoring Joseph’s hand on her hip.

They were all liars.


	23. Until Death Do Us Part (2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook dying in the each member of the Seed family's arms

**Jacob**

“I worked so hard on you.”

He wasn’t sure she was listening, but she was alive at least, despite looking bloody and bruised, her chest was moving. Eyes open, though glazed over, cloudy as if she spent too long in the bliss. He knew that was just the blood loss.

“Y’know, Joseph sat us all down, told us what he saw. Remember him saying something about you being what we were waiting for, that you were only here to destroy us. You were gonna take down Eden’s Gate in a blaze of glory.”

Jacob wrung his hands between his knees, rubbing at the dirt scuffing his jeans from how he collapsed on the ground, haggard from the fight she put up. Not dead, thank God, way better off than her too.

“Guess he was wrong.” Jacob laughed, and if she was more lively she could have heard how meek it sounded. “Thank fuck for that, huh deputy?” He swallowed hard, almost wishing for a response he knew he wasn’t about to get. 

“M’fine.”

“No.” Jacob laid a hand on her back, rubbing at her spine as she tried to struggle to her feet. “No, you’re not.”

Rook proved him right when she got as far as her knees and immediately fell back down, landing on her face when her arms proved useless. “Can’t feel my legs.”

He soothed her with a soft noise in the back of his throat, exactly how you would with a dog. Jacob trained her like one, yet it felt wrong. She was strong, something so much more than he ever thought she could be. This is didn’t seem fitting.

Apparently she didn’t think so either. She was trying to move again, squirming on her stomach in the dirt with a low cry. Jacob stopped that, grabbed her around her waist to pull her between his legs before she could do anymore damage to herself.

“I wanna go home.” She whined out, tossing her head back against his chest.

“Yeah? Want me to take ya there? I was a pilot, remember when I told you that, think I can manage flying you home.” He pulled her closer to his chest, burying his head into her neck. “You can visit your parents, maybe show me who raised the strong soldier you turned out to be. You can introduce me to your relatives, got any sibling, dep?”

Her hand moved sporadically to cover where his own rested on her ribs--broken ribs. Her fingers twitched, conveying what she wanted, trying to hold his hand like they were friends. He granted her that, allowed that moment of vulnerability. Everyone had weak spots in their life, if you live long enough, and Jacob has, you see that even the strongest fall.

“Rook?”

She didn’t answer.

“Rookie.” Said with more force as he jostled her.

His hand pressed under her breast, searching for her heart, moving to her throat second as if it would be different there.

It wasn’t.

*****

**John**

He can’t say he hadn’t meant to take the shot. Because he did. He well and truly was lining up his sight onto the flying projectile the deputy made of herself from the stolen plane he recognized coming from his airstrip.

He had threatened her and her friend with death, so they both should have seen it coming.

And yet, nothing prepared him for this moment. To see Rook lying on the ground near the burning wreckage of her plane. He never thought he’d see her so weak. So helpless and defeated.

John believed in forgiveness. That’s why death seemed harsh, even when he told her it was exactly how he intended to end her wrath. He’d explain to Joseph later how things got out of hand. But that thought only popped into his head twenty minutes ago when they were still invested in their dogfight, when the thought of her dying was something that wasn’t tangible and he was wrathful.

For the first time in a while he felt regret bubble up inside his chest. Making it hard to speak when he knelt down next to her. Her eyes fluttered open to stare up at him. He saw shock there, and anger. God, he never thought that would fully leave her body. There was also resentment, he could understand that one. Figured that he deserved it too.

“Are you gonna finish this, or what?” She laughed at her words. Maybe at him. It was full of pain that John didn’t like.

“Finish you?” He repeated her words, saying them slowly, shaking his head from side to side like he couldn’t comprehend what she meant. “Why wouldn’t I save you? To go through all these months of hard work to just end it all...what would be the point of that?” The smile he gave was forced, but she was slipping away too fast to notice.

“You feel like trying to save me John? I’m dying.” She closed her eyes, and for a second he could fool himself into thinking she was just basking in the sun that dared to peek through the trees on such a somber moment.

Soon she would give him a smile full of teeth and demand that he help her out of this mess so she could be back to making his life a living hell.

“Did you hear me?” She asked softly, hand reaching out to grab at his arm. “I’m dying. And you should be rejoicing. Or calling your family, telling them the good news.”

He shook his head again, still at a loss for words. Trying desperately to speak past the lump in his throat. “My siblings won’t be pleased with this outcome.” He leaned in closer, risking smearing his jeans with mud as he shuffled towards her, placing a hand on the nape of her neck to draw her near to his face. “You’ll be mourned, you’ve made quite the impression deputy.” Her eyes were still closed, he wasn’t sure she could hear him. “And I--I--” He bit back a sob, tipping his head down so his tears wouldn’t land on her.

“I’ve had fun with you. Even if my comments may have made you think otherwise. You made me feel alive.” He spoke the truth too late, he knew that, he also knew that the regret he was feeling was something he’d have to live with for the rest of his life.

When he cried, long after he came to the realization that he was cradling a dead body, he wondered for the first time since he got to Hope County what his life would have been like if he refused his brother’s offer, turned him down and called him crazy. Yelled for security to take the scruffy looking stranger that was too pale, too thin to be in the office of an esteemed lawyer like himself. For the first time he wished he never gave that up, he shouldn’t have even let it get that far, when his receptionist called for him he should have feigned confusion, put up his palms in the form of an apology and backed off.

Seemed like Rook was leading him into a lot of firsts that made him sick.

*****

**Joseph**

He took every precaution available to him to make sure it never came to this. He called off so many people, got them killed when he ordered them to put down their weapons--to tell them not to shoot her.

The Rookie that threatened his homeland, he made sure she was safer than the rest, he did the best he could without making it seem like he wasn’t playing favorites. Not like accusations weren’t thrown his way, and by his own family nonetheless.

He supposed all those crude words on why he wouldn’t just end her life would stop now. Now that she was bleeding out on his bed. Dying from a blade he stuck into her gut, twisted it around her stomach until blood gurgled out of her mouth.

She screamed for him to stop through her own blood. And he did, realizing too late that he went deeper than he meant. He could lie and say it was her fault, that her squirming in his grasp made the knife sink into her stomach more than it should have.

It was his own doing, maybe he’d know that later when he was swimming in guilt.

He already felt the first stirrings of it when she looked up at him with wide, innocent eyes. She looked young, like a scared child. That made him move from his place in the doorway, kneeling on the floor to hold her hands. He stroked the back of her knuckles, brought them to his lips to kiss the scarred skin. Damaged from countless fights.

“Did I do that to you?” She pulled a single hand away, running it around the rim of his eye, where the skin was bruised and turning an ugly purple.

Joseph laughed, smile pulled tight, because, yes, it hurt. He wasn’t about to say that, not when she was dying quicker than he could fix. “You did, got a couple good hits in.”

“And I still lost.” She wheezed the words out, coughed lowly, bold in her fading life to grab his hand, squeeze it tight and pull it to her chest. So he could feel her heartbeat, moving not as steady as it should be. He did that. She wanted to convey that message, whenever he felt guilty or upset, she wanted him to remember this moment. He didn’t get to know sympathy when he was the one who killed her.

Five seconds into her death, with her already going cold, he understand that.

*****

**Faith**

She was singing. After all the pain and torture, this snake of a woman held her tight and sung to her.

It was a joke.

And if Rook wasn’t dying she would tell her just that. Instead she coughed weakly, coughed up blood clots on the ground. Tried to track it with her eyes, afraid it’d land on Faith’s too clean, white dress.

The bliss made it hard to see anything past the sparkles floating around. Or the green haze rising up from the water off to their left.

Rook got a strange feeling that this should be Faith dying on the ground and not her. But maybe that was her pride showing, she wasn’t sure.

“Are you in pain, darling?”

Was she? Considering she couldn’t even feel her mouth, or her tongue, or how to work the two together to string together a sentence. She’d say no. She didn’t feel like she was dying. Not when her body was numb. But her memory was crystal clear.

She knew she was hurt. Stabbed and shot, thrown around like a boxer in a ring. It wouldn’t be a quick death, but it would be painless. Faith made sure of that when she dragged her body towards the water. Brought her close enough until her eyes grew milky.

“This wasn’t what The Father said would happen. It wasn’t supposed to--”

If Rook could see Faith’s face better she’d check if she was crying. It sounded like it. Then again everything was hazy.

“Perhaps I made a mistake. It must’ve been my fault. I’m sorry, this wasn’t what He intended. I’m so sorry.” Faith hugged her closer. Crushing her ribs and cutting off her air, it felt like. “Please forgive me.” Rook still couldn’t speak. Numb. Everything was numb. It felt as if she was dying quicker. That the bliss swirling around them was getting thicker, that Faith was suffocating her.

Her body twitched under Faith’s hold. Writhing in her lap as her eyes rolled back. Gone. Dead and gone, without pain. There’d be a price to pay for Faith, even if she was merciful.


	24. Mistaken Abuse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Each Seed brother impulsively hitting Rook during an argument

**John**

He had Wrath embedded into his soul. It was marked over his body again and again until his very being was filled to the brim. It was always there, ready to spill over and destroy those around him.

Wrath was a dangerous thing. He knew this, he had seen it first hand. Back when his own father couldn’t control his rage with or without the alcohol he bought instead of food or clothes. When Jacob took on that very same rage if only as a defense mechanism.

He had been exposed to it from the very beginning. The odds were against him from the start. Even when he grew older, got away from such an awful man, rage was there. In the Duncans when they beat him for his supposed sins they tried to seek out, in those drugged out frat boys who he spent too much time around.

Then it began to boil inside him. He became infected with Wrath, and one day he woke up and that word was all he knew. It was a defense for him at some times, other times it just seemed easier to be angry.

After all those years and he’d assume that he would learn to temper Wrath. Control it and harness it, as if he was above such a thing. But no, no one could do that, he knew that now, because he was still in situations like these, moments were he was ready attack and maul.

It wasn’t his first fight, definitely not with his own girlfriend standing in front of him. Watching him expectantly with hands on his hips and a gleam in her eyes that showed she knew how unhinged he was. Or maybe it was his mind playing tricks on him, making a lover seem like an enemy in the heat of the moment.

Whatever the case, her calmness only made him angrier. And God help her, if she knew him a little better, like his brothers did, then maybe she would have backed off. Threw a pillow and blanket at his face with a sharp command that he was going to have to sleep on the couch that night, locking their door tight until morning came and they could kiss each other as an apology.

Instead she stood there, with her head cocked, tapping her foot like his loud words wasn’t worth her time.

Then he was pouncing, moving forward in a way that felt comfortable. It was like wearing a different skin, falling back on something familiar with the fluid motion of taking two steps forward. His hands were clenched at his sides, just a moment ago when their fight was only just words thrown, they were shoved deep in his pocket, but now they were a threatening force.

When he did it, they were both taken aback. The crack of skin against skin in his own house, coming from his own hand connecting with her cheek. Wrath. Spelled out clear as day.

Wrath. It was what made him cold inside. It had Rook stumbling away from him as if he had the plague. There was fear over her face, making her eyes cloudy.

He could tell she wanted to cry.

And he wanted to slap himself. He had the burning urge to reach out and grab her, to at least offer some scrap of comfort before he fully lost her to his own madness. She was stepping away from him, hands pulled up to her chest. She was scared of him.

He hated the look she was giving him. It mirrored the same look he gave his father when he was bundled up in Joseph’s arms on the floor, Jacob standing in front of them as the weakest form of protection while John stifled his cries. Looking so scared while being afraid for more.

He felt bile rise in his throat when he turned away from Rook, whispering an apology that he doubted she could hear. He atoned with the knowledge that she was gone, the door slammed shut hours ago when she finally had enough of his bullshit. It might have been the first time he hit her, but she made sure it was the last.

He would too, with each cut on his body as punishment, he would make damn sure nothing like that ever happened again.

*********

**Joseph**

Joseph was gentle and kind and sweet. So loving. Affectionate to an almost painful degree. He held her tight at night, wrapping around her like a koala bear. He washed her hair when they crammed into his shower, he never raised his voice when she was the unreasonable one stirring up trouble.

It was different that night.

“I’ve had enough!” It didn’t come out as an angry snarl. It was a full on scream. Normally that would dissuade, make her pause for the simple fact that Joseph does not yell. He does not get snippy or catty. He loves her.

It was different. Everything was topsy turvy in how calm she was. Moving towards him with raised hands. “Joseph, I didn’t think--”

“No! You didn’t, did you? You never fucking think.” His gestured with a single hand, flipping it at her with an air of annoyance. He grabbed her shoulder next. Pulled her in close until their chests bumped. “I’m getting sick of you.” Then his fingers were around the back of her neck, squeezing tight until her shoulders hunched inward.

He yanked her along by her neck, pulled her towards the door, probably seconds away from kicking her out. Her hands came up to grab at his wrist, trying and failing to yank him away.

It was like he wasn’t Joseph anymore, because that only made him angrier. It fueled the rage from such a stupid fight--a fight she couldn’t recall the slightest reason as to what started it. Her touch, that simple tug had him shove her back, his hand rose.

And he slapped her. Backhanded her hard enough to have her face turning to the side.

In an instant her eyes were blown wide, already filling with tears as she gave him a sideways glance. Her gaze wavered, there was fear there. She was scared. Of him. The one who vowed to protect him for as long as they lived.

His hand rose again, having her taking two steps back. It had his fingers clench painfully tight until he stepped closer. Closing the distance so he could properly cup her cheek. Draw her in near so she fit in the curve of his body.

“I’m sorry.”

Her silence was staggering. Forcing him to focus on her uneven breathing and the thrumming of his heart heavy in his ears.

“Rook? Please.” He drew back, tilting her head up so he could see her eyes, lids blotted pink from the steady stream of tears falling. “You’d know I’d never hurt you. That’s not me. I am nothing like--” An angry sigh cut off his words. Along with emotions rising in his throat which made his eyes go blurry with tears. His fists clenching at the nape of her neck, tangling in her hair. It was enough to make her start trembling again. “I am nothing like my father. I don’t use my fists to rule. You know this, darling.”

“I thought I did.”

She reached up, a hand mirroring where he had slapped her. Her fingers ran over the too long stubble he wore. “You just had to prove me wrong, huh Joseph.” She was pulling away from his grasp before he could yank her back in. Stepping out the door and leaving his hands empty to hang at his sides.

Gone quicker than he realized she was capable of.

*********

**Jacob**

Every day of his miserable life he was beaten. Torn down piece by piece until all that was left was the shell of a broken man with too many issues to keep track of. He was destroyed by his father, his peers at school, enemy soldiers, and by the government especially. He wouldn’t wish that upon anyone he cared for. He wept for what his brothers had to endure. Cried whenever John did, sobbed after hearing what Joseph dared to do to his daughter--Jacob’s niece--because no one should be harmed by someone meant to love them.

He had that mentality for years. It was a code to live by.

With a past like that, even with his thought process of never laying his hands on someone who needs protection, the world wouldn’t be surprised if he was the kind of neighbor who hides inside with his fourth bottle of beer. Who threatens his kids and beats on his wife.

So if word of this ever got out to the small place Hope County was--they’d crucify him.

“I’m sorry.” A reflex to say whenever their arguments turned explosive. But this was more than throwing books and cutlery aimed for the walls, this was a hand thrown across her face. More like a punch if he was to look too closely at it. A closed fist to her jaw. Making her stumble back from the force of it.

His hand was still clenched. Now behind his back, pressed painfully against the wall where he trapped it. Scared he’d do it again.

“Didn’t--I didn’t--I...I’m sorry Rook.”

“Are you?”

The question seemed stupid to him. It had him stumbling for a response for way too long. His words weren't coming out right, refusing to form when he watched her put distance between them.

His head dropped, unwilling to meet her gaze. He didn’t need to see the hurt in her eyes. He was afraid he’d see something he recognized. Something he never thought he’d have to bear witness to again, he thought he left all that in the past.

He didn’t want to see any resemblance from years past when John was scared he’d get beat for the smallest of transgressions. So damn fearful a man taller and bigger than him would strike with a loss of temper.

He definitely recognized the slam of his office door. Ringing out like an awful gunshot. Having the same effect, making him weak and sick until he fell to ground on his ass. Sliding down the wall and bashing his head backwards. Mimicking that same pain he forced her to endure.


	25. Scarring

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first time Rook gets a close personal look at the Seeds' scars

**Jacob**

When he caught her once, she was treated just like the rest. Dubbed a prisoner who had to throw away all their morals if they wanted to survive. Name logged somewhere for Jacob to track, personal effect removed. Reducing everyone down to their primal state,thrown in a cage in a drab courtyard with no food and little water. Clothes torn into pieces just as her skin was from the countless fights she was forced into. Before she only heard story of what Jacob did, hell, she only heard stories of what he looked like. She’s only ever seen him in the darkened space of a closed church.

He didn’t visit her much.

When she was thrown back outside with the remaining threats acting like a promise that he’d drag her back again, she saw him less.

The second time he sunk his claws into her, and The Father wanted a word. What about, she was unsure. She’d have to hear it from the man himself firsthand.

She saw the concern in Joseph’s eyes when he appeared like a God in the nighttime. Second time capture, second time she saw Jacob. Though it wasn’t good enough, she never really got to see him the way she wished she could. So her eyes strayed from Joseph’s worried gaze in to watch Jacob.

He dragged her back in with a soft, encouraging noise in the back of her throat. It didn’t matter, she couldn’t see shit in the dark. Her focus went to Joseph, saw him rake his eyes over her hair, which was a tangled mess. There was a twitch of his lips when he saw the dirt covering her skin in thick layers. She was riddled with cuts and bruises that seemed endless, too many to keep track of.

She watched him count her ribs through her thin shirt.

It was probably Joseph’s orders to clean her up after he caught sight of the fearsome deputy knocked down a few pegs. Perhaps Jacob was told to treat her better, more human, so she didn’t end up dead like so many in his older brother’s care. Jacob wouldn’t confirm or deny, but she had a feeling that’s why she woke up the next morning inside a smaller cage in his office.

That provided her with her first good look at the soldier. A man who she still considered a devil in so many ways by how he always lurked in the shadows when he was near. Now she could see. She could take in his broad stature early in the morning when he exited the shower, a thin, sorry excuse for a towel draped around his waist.

The light was more beautiful than ever, if only because of the view she was finally able to have. She got to see the scars she heard about, the ones from what she assumed were chemical burns--not from flames--she saw scars she assumed al the Seeds had. One’s from childhood, from a man bigger than the young boy Jacob was at the time. They littered his shoulder blades, the small of his back. Most covered up from his burns.

She wondered if he was ever grateful for that. Those memories turned physical reminders scratched out from a different tragedy. They’d never be close enough to ask, so she remained silent. Eyes peering out from the pillow she made out of her arms.

On the backs of his legs she saw long, thin marks. Most faded from the sun. Probably back when he was at war. Back in the desert where the sun was an enemy just as much as the men shooting at you, where it was red hot and oppressive.

He turned, towel yanked off to be used to scrub at his hair. It obscured his face, hid his eyes for a moment. Giving her ample time to take inventory of the mess his front was.

Uglier than his backside. Like a bear attacked him, followed by a cougar and a fall off a cliff. It made her wince, seeing all those scars up close. There were newer ones on his chest, one near his waistline, where his jeans would rest snugly. Those made sense, he was still at war, the one she was unofficially leading.

His chest hair, a furry teeming, sporadic thing, made it difficult to see what laid underneath. She was sure she saw ink. A mixture of black and white, maybe some blue or red. Different than John’s monochromatic sprawling nonsense. The tattoo he had--over his chest and reaching towards his shoulder--looked like it had a real sentimental purpose.

She moved on from that, searched for inconsistencies. Frowning when her sharp eyes still couldn’t see anything through his chest hair.

When her eyes jolted up to his face, she saw his face. Towel removed, hanging by his side in a limp hand. Not looking angry or smug. Just expressionless. Watching her watch him.

“Something wrong, Rook? Got anything on your mind?”

She sat up straighter, taking in his features when he got closer. Towel brushing along his chest then his hip, collecting water as it went. When he bent half over, palm steadying himself on the top of her cage, she dared to get closer. Her hands gripped the bars tight as she sat up on her knees.

Her eyes scrunched up in concentration. Mouth falling open in a small ‘O’. Chemical burns were there, flanking either side of his face. Claiming one side more than the other. They stretched down, past his thick beard which hid them perfectly. Moving to cradle his neck.

“I’m sorry.” She reached up, a hand brushing a wet, singled out strand of hair to the side. “I’m so sorry.”

*****

**Joseph**

She had caught sight of Joseph once or twice. Too scared to chance getting near enough for him to even speak to her. Some people said when his lips moved they lied.

She’d never been up close after those warning pushed into her head, she’s never had the chance. It was curiosity that made her shrug them off, for her to come to terms with herself that if ever given the opportunity she’d gladly introduce herself. And really she could claim it was business, for the good of the Resistance, it’d be foolish not to speak to the figurehead of Eden’s Gate. Especially when he was so vulnerable at this moment. Stupid enough to not have any of his loyal men flanking him as he strolled through the woods.

There was an easy swing in his arms, a smile hanging off his lips as his eyes pointed skyward to take in the scenery, as if he was oblivious of the target he had on back.

She stayed a step behind him, hoping and praying it wasn’t a waste of time. It very well could be, he may run a cult, but he was just a man. And men take walks, they have downtime. 

Joseph ended up leading her to a lake. In fact, it didn’t even deserve that title. It was more like a watering hole. Said water being a light green from algae. With a lack of fish, or any wildlife to liven up the scene. He came to swim. That’s what she initially thought, taking in the surge of disappointment with an angry sigh leaving her lips.

She was ready to turn back the way she came. Leave in a wrathful huff with mutterings of curse words because she didn’t know where the fuck she was.

Then he chucked off his clothes. All his clothes. That made her hesitate.

He was bathing. Running blunt, dirty nails through his downed hair. Scrubbing at his arms, twisting to reach his back, wincing when his hand came into contact with a fresh cut across his shoulder blades.

Rook must have made some sort of noise. Perhaps she stepped on a fallen twig, or rustled the leaves next to her. Whatever the case, something caught Joseph’s attention. He didn’t exactly stop what he was doing, simply waded over to the edge of his lake to lean against the muddy shore. His head was propped up on his hands, eyebrows scrunched as he watched the tree line for movement again.

“You can come out.” He called, a smile tipping his lips up, trying to coax an answer that she wasn’t about to give. “I’m not angry with you for watching.” He dipped one hand back into the water, making ripples before he raised his hand, wiggling his fingers in the air. Entranced by how the droplets clung to him. “Perhaps you’d like to join me?”

Nothing. But he still knew she was there.

He shrugged, turning his back on her. That’s when she moved, not turning back the way she came--too dangerous. Too many sharp rocky slopes and men with guns ready to kill her. She could sprint to the other end of the forest. Find the tallest point of the mountain so she could figure out where she was.

He wasn't facing her. It’d take less than a minute to reach the other side where the hills continued to ascend. Rook breathed in deep, steeling herself before she ran.

She miscalculated. Totally miscalculated from where the edge of the lake was, or just how muddy the embankment seemed to be. It was 100% her fault that her foot slipped and she plunged into the icy water in the blink of an eye. Water that was cold enough to steal away her breath and make her muscles lock up.

Joseph was on her fast, grabbing her under her arms. Looking more surprised that she wasn’t fighting than why she was here.

“Rook?” He pulled her to his chest, guiding her weightless body along until he could stand on solid ground. Leaving her feet still kicking because she definitely was not taller than him. “You were the one following me for so long?”

“You knew?” She hated how whiny she sounded. That she still couldn’t see straight through the water clogging her eyes and that they in no way on the same level.

He only smiled at her, not bothering to even pretend he was considering her question. “I find this symbolic, you and I bathing under God’s light.”

“Let me go.”

And he did. His arms left her, leaving her to scramble to catch her foot on the bottom of the lake. When she did, she found that his back was turned to her again. Allowing her the choice to walk away. His hands swirled around the water, completely vulnerable.

She stood there, taking deep breaths, trying to decide what would be right and just under the law. Because she was still a goddamn cop. She wanted that to guide her actions for once since she’s gotten to Hope County.

With the sun blasting down on the both of them--God’s light--she could make out his skin more clearly. All those tiny imperfections. The freckles and birthmarks she never could have seen unless she was as close as she was now.

There were fading bruises on his side, a few new cuts scouring along his spine. As if he was in a fender bender that only left him dazed. That was all to be expected considering who he was. And not at all what stole her breath away and made her rooted to her spot. Her body growing cold from the water.

She traced scars with her eyes. Ones on his ribs that had a poor stitch job done, more on his hips and others she could barely see through the distortion from beneath the water. Moving over his legs.

“You went through a lot, huh?”

Just like that, seeing him bare with his many flaws, tracking his features when he did turn to her, she felt a sudden wave of guilt wash over her. Weighing her down and making her feel like she was going to drown.

“We all have gone through a lot, child. Life is difficult for everyone, you can see that if you spoke to each and every person in my flock. They all had rough lives.”

“Yeah...yeah but you had it so much worse. Look at you.” She gestured to him, saw him follow her eyes to his bare skin.

“Do they bother you that much?”

Rook floundered for an answer. Brows drawing tight together, searching for something that would placate him. Instead her shoulders sagged. To Joseph it looked like a flower wilting. When her head dropped to avoid his gaze, how she leaned against the embankment to keep herself from falling.

“Rook?”

“Not in the way you think. I--I just need to--” Her throat tensed, closing up on her suddenly. Stopping her flow of words. “I gave you hell when you already went through so much.”

“It’s not your fault.”

She wanted to yell at him, and maybe she would have if she thought he would yell back and soothe her wrath. But she just stood there, let him come closer until he was wrangling her in for a hug. “This can end, you can just...stop. No more pain will befall anyone else in this county. We can wait out the collapse and start anew. Just as God intended. It will be something amazing.”

“Is that what’s waiting for us after the end of the world? A place with no suffering,” she traced the scar on his ribs, winced at the unevenness of it, “no more scars. Just peace. Sounds too good to be true.”

He tipped her chin up, smiled down at her with so much serenity that she realized how he drew so many people towards him. That and the fear, fear always made people do crazy things. It was making her consider everything she was doing here.

“Maybe. But it’s what God wants. And as his Shepherd, I will do everything in my power to make sure that happens.”

*****

**John**

After all the abuse he’s endured, it was a miracle he made it out on the other side. Maybe he would have seen it that way too if he wasn’t so scarred. Every little detail of his life, the time spent with his brothers and with the Duncans, he wasn’t allowed to forget about it.

He bore them with pride, once upon a time. Showed them off with expectations of sympathy. Joseph rid him of that sense, it was a sin after all. So yes, his sins were on display as they should be, but as long as he thought about his scars as marks of pride, they’d be covered.

They were ugly things. Indents from a belt buckle on his ribs and shoulder blades, thin spindly lines from a whip. Some raised, a pinkish color dulled by years. Others were faded, barely there, something you wouldn’t see unless you were looking for them.

And in this rare case--Rook was indeed looking for them. With permission granted, she sat cross legged on John’s bed, hands tied up behind her back, because originally this was supposed to be a confession. He caught her fair and square, soon to be transferred to his bunker for a more official experience.

Then she started talking. Asking questions. Speaking of his past with an innocent note in her voice. He deigned to answer her. That wasn’t enough. She wanted to see.

No one’s ever saw, even his brothers keep their eyes to themselves when he blew up once or twice. Anger raging forward at them for seeing the sins of his past. They went through it with him, but they didn’t need to see that. No one did.

But the deputy was sitting in his bed, promising a confession--the one that they’d all been waiting for--and all John had to do was temper her curiosity. She claimed that was all it was.

So he put a hold on the transport van and began unbuttoning his vest. His back was to her, he didn’t want to see the pity that would be there. Next came his shirt, torn off quick and violently as he tossed it across the room. That left him bare, it gave her a chance to stare at the scars he had gathered over the years.

“John…”

Pity. Sympathy. Something he’s been trying to avoid. The kind of emotions a person like Rook shouldn’t have for him.

“Oh. Can you untie me?”

“No.” Sharp. Quick. Venom spilling from his tongue as he glanced over his shoulder. Found that to be a mistake when he swore he saw her choked up. About to cry like they meant something to each other.

So she kept her mouth shut. Understood how uncomfortable he was from just a single glance. Instead she let her eyes wander. What was supposed to be a ploy, a cover story that should have given her the chance to escape, now became too real.

She figured he had scars. With rumors of the Seeds’ past, people wanting to pick apart their brains, she heard all about his past. If any of that was true, he’d have the marks to prove it. And he did, ranging all over him. She would guess he has more underneath his jeans Tangling down his thighs and legs to show for the sins those in his youth said he had.

“You done, deputy?”

Rook made some sort of noise, apparently good enough for John. Because he moved lightening fast to cut through the ropes. He was grabbing at her, yanking her to her feet, making her stumble as her foot caught on his larger shoes. Instinct made her turn, had her shove John down so they could fall back on the softness of his bed.

John was thrashing in an instant, claws reaching up to get her off, then moving to reach for what she expected should be a gun. She heard him curse low in his throat through the frenzy, his gun was probably left in his shirt, discarded and forgotten about on the floor.

“Get off! Help!”

Her hand moved over his mouth, muffling his pitiful cries for his men outside.

Her free hand touched where she wanted to just a second before. Over his scars, the ones she saw on his shoulders, and the ones he didn’t let her see spanning the length of his chest. That simple act made him stiffen up. Jaw clenching in anger, eyes wide, filled with something wild.

Like an animal caught in a trap. Ensnared with no way out.

Her knees pulled in tight around his rib cage, straddling in fiercer, keeping him locked in so she could touch his tattoos. The larger ones that made a sorry attempt to cover up old scars, misshapen ink drawn over something suspiciously looking like burns. 

“What has happened to you? God, you poor thing.”

John shifted. And she let him, she allowed him to move. Hands held up cautiously, so not to startle. All he did was curl on his side, knees drawing up as protection to unseen demons he still carried.

She shushed him, brushing fingers across the sweat on his forehead. Rook ignored how he reached for his radio, jammed between himself and the bed. “Call off the transport.”

“Sir?”

“Call. It. Off. I’ll tell Joseph.”

“The Father’s here, he’s waiting. He’s--he doesn’t seem very happy.”

John laughed, tossed the radio so hard against the wall adjacent to them that it shattered into a million little pieces.

His one eye, the one not pressed painfully tight to the bed, found her own. “That means trouble for me, doesn’t it? Joseph---people thinks he’s nice, he can get angry.”

“Does he hurt you?”

John scoffed, like the mere thought was humorous. “We’re brothers. He would never. He just...yells a lot. Tells me how disappointed he is, that I’m better than all this.” He unfurled a hand away from his chest to touch her cheek, to move down to her collar bone. “That’s not true though.”

With his arm that close, she could see for the first time the small tiny dots lining on his inner elbow. Where a doctor might draw blood. Or where a junkie might find his high through dirty needles.

“You’re not as broken as you think. This,” she ran a thumb over those healed injection marks, “can be fixed. You need help.” She leaned down to offer a kiss to his cheek. “I got you. You’re fine now. You’re safe, right here.”

She’d stay the night. One night. Maybe it would become a habit. Maybe they’d forget about all of this. Whatever the case, he’d be a little less broken than tonight. 


	26. Changes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set further in the future, where their daughter is just old enough to start having crushes and how the Seeds would deal with such a thing

**Jacob**

He watched her grow. From the very day when she was born, and he had the honor to hold their little girl in his arms, he knew he would a constant in her life. He would teach her and guide her with a gentle hand that would remain forever patient.

He didn’t have anything to go off of, no father of his own to remember what a parent should do. He’d try though.

Ever since she was a little girl, despite having all odds against him, he kept his promise.

Then Rook needed a break, a week away from the hurricane Jacob had always been. He wasn’t offended, he knew his lifestyle was reckless, he also knew that Rook was more of a free spirit than he ever imagined. She needed time, he could give it to her.

He kissed her on the cheek with a murmur of goodbye, accompanied with the promise of a little reunion when he got back from his hike. Two days, he said, think you can wait that long? He grabbed her ass, landing his second kiss on her lips, sucking at her neck a moment later.

“Can I come?”

Her voice was sweet, a quiet whisper--kind just like her mother--entering without their notice. Jacob jumped back all at once, hands held behind his back with furrowed eyebrows. Cheeks tinted red for the first time in years.

Rook glanced at him, a shrug lifting her shoulders up, “Fine by me.”

Jacob gestured her forward with the crook of a finger, tossing a bag her way to pack. He couldn’t help but notice the queer look in Kat’s eyes when he pulled away from Rook. And suddenly he was embarrassed all over again.

*****

She brought it up over the campfire dinner he made for them. Food balanced on her knee--a large fish he caught when the first one she reeled in was too tiny to eat--she leaned forward, making him nervous when her hair dangled over her shoulder, close to catching on the fire.

“You’re a guy.”

Jacob blinked. Food halfway to his open mouth, his eyes flicked down to the knife it was speared on and back up to her. “Last time I checked.”

She huffed at his answer. As if she expected something better.

“You understand...guy things. How they work”

“Work the same as you I s’pose.”

She raised an eyebrow, watching him when he avoided her gaze as well as her probing words by ramming cod down his throat. “Yeah?” She challenged, sounding way more clever than a thirteen year old should, “Would you grab a guy’s ass?”

“Excuse me?”

It was probably the first time he let anger creep into his voice. So careful never to yell at her, afraid she would grow to resent him, or even fear him.

“Language.” He admonished a second later, hoping Rook would be proud of those set of parenting skills even if his own vocabulary was full of worse words.

“You did it to mom. Pretty sure you stuck your tongue down her throat too.”

Jacob wiped fish blood off on his jeans. Laughing under his breath, because really, how the fuck did he get stuck in this situation without Rook? And here he thought that parenting would be a two person job. That she’d handle all this crap, he would only hear whispers of how she was growing into something more than his little girl.

“Where’s this coming from Kitten?”

She flushed, shoulders hunching in on herself with her food forgotten about. “So..ah,” She giggled, nervous and exhilarated, “There’s this boy--”

“Here? In Hope County? The Whitetail Mountains?”

“Where else?” Said with the rush of bravado she was known for. The same trait she got from her mom. “You sound surprised.”

“How the fuck did you meet someone?”

“Language,” She teased back, trying to ease the tension Jacob wore around his shoulders. She didn’t like the lines around his face that formed when she began speaking, making him look too old.

“Who?”

“No. No, that’s not how this works. I talk, you listen.”

He snorted, eyes flicking up to her, “That right?”

Kat nodded sharply, focused completely on him. Still looking nervous. “How did you do it? Get mom, I mean.”

“You need to get that fact straight, she got me, Kitten. Not the other way around.” He tipped his head to the side, gesturing with his knife, now free from cod, “That changes sometimes though, sometimes…” He trailed off, realizing just who he was talking to. She was listening with rapt attention though. Wanting her father’s approval above all else. He could see that.

So he reached past the fire, caught the worry in her eyes when his arm bent a little too close to the flames. He squeezed at her knee with something he hoped was a reassuring smile. “You’re gonna be fine, Kitten. You know why?”

A small shake, looking like a little girl again.

“You’re just like your mother. Strong. Smart. Clever, and way beyond wise. I have faith in you.”

She groaned at his words, shoving his arm away with a half smile. “Stop. You’re starting to sound like Uncle Joe.”

“Discussion over then?”

She grabbed his hand at the last second before he could pull it back. She shook it firmly, sealing a deal. “Discussion over, old man. For now.”

*****

**John**

John’s hands froze, his fingers tightened minutely around his ballpoint, eyes not yet raised. Still trying to process what he just heard. The words that came out of the mouth of his precious darling child.

“I’d like to meet him.”

She laughed, swinging her feet wildly from where she sat perched on the edge of his desk. Crumpling documents beneath her weight. “You’d kill him.”

“No.” John stood briskly. Hands clenching at his side from this new found information. “No, I’d only like to show off my gun. The same way Aunt Faith shows off her flowers to everyone that crosses her path.”

He yanked out the drawer from an office locker, waving a revolver around with a disarming smile. “No harm done, sweetheart. What’s his name?”

“I don’t think you’d like him very much.”

John walked over with swinging arms, crouching down on one knee to hold onto her arm. He tilted his head, trying not to convey the feeling of anger welling up inside him. It was only a crush, that’s what Rook would tell him. A simple puppy dog sort of love for someone just starting to feel those things.

“Being my child, I’m hoping you have refined taste. Who is he?”

She bit her lip, a smile splitting her mouth wide as she hopped down from the desk, gripping onto John’s arm just as he had done to her. Now though, it was a rough hold, her nails were biting into his skin in a way that could be described as excitement.

“The Ryes have two kids.”

John’s heart dropped, he held onto hope, smiled through the panic as he nodded encouragement. “Carmina and…” he drew a blank, “And their boy. They had a kid same time we had you, stole the fucking spotlight.”

“Dad.”

He fell back on his ass, gun dangled from loose fingers between his knees. “Yes?”

“Rafael. That’s their son’s name. And he’s cute.”

She ended the sentence with a laugh, hopping up on her feet and twirling around his office with spread arms. Her hands drew up to her chest a moment later, smile still present, as she rocked on her heels. “He’s my age.”

“I’m well aware of the Rye family and their spawn.” He waved her off as he stood, tossing the gun on the desk as he ran a hand over his face. “And what’s so appealing about a Rye child, may I ask?”

“We only met because of his father. The way he flies is amazing! He does tricks in the air, he even teaches people, he’s training Carmina right now! One day Rafey will fly.”

John stood still, watching his daughter carefully. Capping his rage because really anyone else would say it’s unjustified. But someone from that family, out of all the people in Hope County to choose from. A disgrace, truly.

“I fly. And I can do tricks.”

“Then why don’t you?” She pursed her lips, probably going through her head, reliving the times where she saw him up in the air and definitely not doing any cool flips or spins. “Rafael is going to become an ace pilot.”

John grumbled something under his breath, a hand on his daughter’s shoulder to direct her out of the room. He’d have to speak to Rook, she would no doubt laugh, but a talk was in order. He nudged her over the threshold, a frown pulling his lips down when he closed the door, not missing her words.

“You’re not gonna shoot him, are you?”

“Haven’t decided yet. Give me twenty minutes to arrange an army. I’m sure Jacob would love to help.”

*********

**Joseph**

“You looked troubled child.”

She gave a soft laugh, shoulders drawing in tight as she hunched down in the pew. She avoided his eyes when he got down on bended knee. He cupped her cheeks when she sighed softly, “Darling? You can talk to me.”

He didn’t like the look in her eyes, nor did he care for the nervous glances she shot around the room. It had him upset before he knew what was going on with his own flesh and blood. He was meant to protect her, and he really didn’t like how she was shifting uncomfortably on the wooden bench.

“It’s not--I’m not a sinner.”

Joseph blinked at her, reeling back slightly. “Of course not.” His hand smoothed over her hair, “You’re only a child.”

“Okay.” She seemed unconvinced, eyes closing tight as she dipped her head. “But, it’s not lust, you know?”

He blinked again. Quiet this time around, because really, he did not know. Her mind was frazzled, that much was clear. “Then what is it?”

He watched his daughter’s cheeks grow a rosy pink, suddenly looking years older than his little girl. It clicked then, that when Rook told him just a week ago that she wasn’t a child any longer--a fact he refused to believe--she’d always be his child, no matter her age. But Rook was right. This wasn’t a childish problem that made her nervous and embarrassed.

She bit down on her lip, hard. He was tempted to scold her, to place his hands on her shoulders to pull her out of her head. He waited though, patience was something he had gotten good at. “Did you expect me to love someone who was apart of the church, father?”

“I--I, ah, I expect you to love everyone you come into contact with. To be understanding and kind, always helpful. To not harbor hatred for anyone belonging to my flock.”

“That’s not the kind of love I’m talking about and you know it.” There was a sudden rush of anger in her tone, the type that made her whole body tense as her jaw clenched. It was different for his kid, it was an anger that only festered in his wife, not his daughter.

“Jules--”

“No. Just listen.” She breathed out a sigh, slumping back against the pew. “I’m not a kid anymore, right?”

He bit back a smile, afraid she’d see it and think he was only patronizing her. Because she was fifteen. She was a child, but he humored her, nodding along with her words. Encouraging anything, at this point she was making him worry with all her vaugaries.

“Mom and I go into two times a week.”

“Yes, your mother visits friends, and you come home with too much candy.”

Her body relaxed, a laugh slipping free. “Mhm. Yeah, and I meet new people. I have to.” She defended, pitch rising despite him not giving the slightest disapproval. “No one here is my age, everyone here is old and…” She scrunched up her nose, “Really religious.”

Joseph ignored that subtle jab, always feeling as if Rook’s lack of faith was bound to grow in their daughter. A different matter for a different time. Instead he smiled, “And you want friends, people to hang out with. You think I’d be mad about something so insignificant?”

She seethed again, cheeks growing red, though this time with anger. Any and all traces of embarrassment erased. He wasn’t putting two and two together and Jules was starting to wonder if he had always been an ignorant, pious church man.

“I think I’ve fallen in love. Do you--You know what that’s like.”

His mouth opened, no words coming out. Making her shift, avoiding his eyes. “I suppose.”

He was infuriating. Just not getting it. And at this point she was more annoyed than upset. With a puff of air she gripped onto his shoulder, digging manicured nails in that--one day--he might claim was pride.

“Dad---”

“I know, I know.” He cooed, cutting her off with a soft look. “Sweet child, I don’t want you to fear me. Above all, I want you to be happy. Even if they aren't our people.”

“Even if they used to be apart of the resistance?”

She wasn’t looking at him anymore. Suddenly more interested in her twiddling fingers now in her lap instead of him. The silence that built up around them was unnerving, and it made her risk a glance up at him.

His eyebrows were furrowed tight. “The resistance? That was a while ago. May I ask just how old he is?”

“She.” His daughter corrected. Timidly, a small church mouse facing down a lion. When no response came, just a gentle smile coaxing more words out from her, she continued. “And he’s only a few years older than I am.” She could tell from the tip in her father’s head that he wasn’t too convinced. “You’re years older than mom. You’re an old man.”

Joseph was too surprised to be offended. All that slipped free was a laugh before his hand held tight to the pew his daughter was seated on. “Am I?”

She nodded once, a fierce defiance in her eyes. “You are.” She said pointedly, foot knocking playfully into his ankle. “You’re an old man, and mom’s a young woman. You two were on different sides. I know the story.”

His lips pulled tight into something close to a frown. He was regretting ever being so forthcoming with her. “You are intent on making history repeat itself, aren't you child?”

Jules shoulders rose in a shrug, standing with a gesture for him to follow. Yanking him into a hug with small arms wrapping halfway around his middle. “I just plan on making you and mom proud. That means starting a family, having a life.”


	27. Cheating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How the Seeds would react to being caught cheating on Rook

**Jacob**

  * Jacob was wide awake when Rook stumbled in from where ever she was that late at night. He took advantage of her restlessness. Knowing that she takes trips days at a time to just be alone.
  * She walks in and he’s not exactly being intimate with the woman sprawled out on _their_ bed, not cuddling like he does with her when the nightmares get to be too much, but he’s still sitting on the edge of the bed. Head tipped to watch her sleep. It’s just intimate enough to make Rook sick.
  * She makes no noise when she walks in--she thought he’d be asleep after all--and she watches him. Goes over the scene of clothes tossed everywhere and slammed the door shut. She was wrath, she was fucking pissed.
  * Jacob is alert in an instant, standing so quick he stumbles. He’s just as naked as the harlot tucked safely under the blankets. He doesn’t even have the decency to look apologetic. He just stares blankly, waiting for her to make the first move.
  * And when she does, she screams. He tells he to be quiet, of all things, and actually looks nervous she’ll startle his play thing.
  * Despite how mad she is, she does whisper yell, maybe it was instinct as this point to please him. “What? Afraid I’ll wake her? That I’ll ruin this little relationship you’ve got going?”
  * “It’s not a relationship--don’t act stupid, Rook.”
  * Rook doesn’t bother to unpack the bag she took with her for her trip, she wants to leave immediately. She tells him this, close to tears. “You know how hard it is to love a man who insists on not being loved? A man who thinks he is unworthy of me? I’m trying, and you aren’t. You never try, you’re content to let me pull all the weight, huh Jacob?” She has to catch herself from calling him Jake. They’re not that close anymore. She doesn’t know this man.
  * He still doesn’t bother to get dressed, and he fucking apologizes to his new lover when she wakes up. A hand motioning for her to lay back down, a gesture meant to soothe her. Something he’s done for Rook so many times before.
  * Rook understandably leaves before he can explain himself. She doesn’t wait to hear him tell her that he felt insecure, that those doubts began to creep in again. That he’s only ever done something like this twice in his past.
  * He doesn’t think any of that matters now.
  * He finds out later Rook is staying with John. Looking towards him for a shoulder to cry on, and for a perfect lawyer who knows how to help her get a divorce without her ending up broke and sans her belongings.
  * Jacob doesn’t fight it when John is the one to grab her things out of Jacob’s office to deliver to Rook. He just hands John a letter of apology. A last ditch effort to get her back, that’s as far as he’ll go for now. He’ll hope that’ll be enough to bring her back lest she makes things difficult for them both.
  * In fact, if she even tries to leave the county, he’ll be sure to get her back. He’ll keep her caged like an animal, mirroring the first time she entered his region and they were enemies. He’ll train her to love him again.



“You know pup, running away like that, can’t say that’s fair. Not when you never gave me a second chance. People make mistakes, even you have your faults. Now hush, don’t start yelling. I can leave ya here, all alone in this dark room, stuck inside this cage for a couple days so you can have some time to think. I don’t have to visit you daily. Not when you’re so damn rude. That’s no way to treat your husband. You’ll learn though. That was just a moment of weakness for me, and so long as you’re right here, I won’t have a reason to doubt your love for me.”

**John**

  * John is on his knees begging by the time Rook opens the door to their room. He’s out of bed so fucking fast that she barely sees what’s going on. Barely.
  * She still saw him. Curled up with a stranger, his head resting on her chest, hand dipped between her legs, basking in the afterglow with his mouth around one of her nipples. She saw bruises and bitemarks and so much sin. But he got out of bed so fast that she swore she was imagining the whole scene.
  * He’s literally at her feet, clawing at her hips and kissing her stomach. “Darling, dearest, please, please just listen to me. Let me explain.”
  * He’s so desperate and he’s on the verge of tears. John’s not a hard one to figure out, she knows him well. This isn’t an act. He’s real close to hyperventilating and he’s starting to worry her. So she grabs him until he’s standing. He lets her cup his cheeks and rub her thumbs across his beard. Ignoring the woman in her bed for now to prevent John’s panic attack.
  * “It’s fine John. Breathe. You got five minutes, talk to me.” There’s an underlying current of anger beneath her words. That’s probably what makes him move so fucking fast in the next moment. He’s snarling out his words, roughly grabbing the stranger to manhandle her out of their bed. He’s shoving her out of their room with orders to get out and never come back lest she wants to be strung up on one of the bridges in the Henbane.
  * John’s all teary eyed and apologies. Begging for forgiveness. Going as far as to grab a blade from his bedside table, telling Rook he would repent. He’s still naked so it’s easy for him to just say some prayer and cut into himself.
  * On the chance that Rook leaves, John will still atone for the adultery he committed. Only going to Joseph after his body is riddled in cuts. Joseph would be the one to convince John to track Rook down. Joseph has seen such a change in his brother when Rook was in his life. It was the kind of love John never got before that he desperately needed. Joseph understands more than John does that he’ll fall apart without Rook.
  * But if Rook stays, she would have to be the one to stop him from slicing into his skin. The knife has to be fought for in order for him to relax.
  * Either way, once she’s with him again, in his ranch, he’s locking the both of them inside their room. He just won’t stop talking. Asking for her to understand, making sure she still loves him. The whole nine yards.



“Please. Please don’t leave. You m-might not understand. Or care to hear my side, but you gotta know how fu-fucking hard this has been for me. To let you love me and to try and trust someone when everyone I’ve known has stabbed me in the back a-and kicked me while I was down. I know you love me, I just forget sometimes. It’s so hard to believe someone like you wants the broken mess that I am. Just please, please stay.”

**Joseph**

  * Joseph doesn’t know what to say at first. He’s waiting up for her when she comes home, sitting in his just his boxers with his head held in his hands. He stops her from speaking, calm when Rook’s face shows true concern for how messy his appearance is.
  * He immediately admits to what he has done. Doesn’t try to sugarcoat it. Laying out all the facts in a mournful voice.
  * He stays calm when she raises her voice. Which makes her angrier. Joseph doesn’t try to beg for her forgiveness, he doesn’t verbally fight back, he doesn’t even seem to mind when she slaps him. He knows he deserves it. That sinners like him need to be punished.
  * He assures her that whoever he had sex with is long gone, that they won’t be showing their face around for a while.
  * Joseph doesn’t protest when Rook suggests he sleeps on the couch, or that he leaves outright. He knows what he did was wrong.
  * So he grabs a pillow and blanket and makes his bed on the pull out mattress. He’ll stay like that for months until she lets him back in if that’s what it takes.
  * He will be overly demure for the next few weeks. Head always pointed down, a lack of eye contact. His voice will be hushed, as if he’s afraid of making another mistake in Rook’s presence.
  * Joseph will prayer endlessly for her hasty forgiveness, but he won’t be the one to go to Rook. She has to come to him if she wants anything to change. He doesn’t want to push--he no longer has that right--he knows that. So he’ll wait for her until she accepts him again. 



“Rook? I know, I know. You’d rather not hear my voice right now. Just this once, let me explain. Then I’ll leave you alone, you have my word...if that’s even worth anything anymore. Know that I’ve confessed and atoned. I payed for these sins in the eyes of the Lord, He has forgiven me. But I can see the anger you harbor for me. I still haven’t earned _your_ forgiveness. Perhaps the one that matters the most. I will wait for you, my darling. I’ll wait for years if that’s what it takes. I’ll be right outside your door, you have this choice to make. And I’ll respect whatever decision you come to.”


	28. Bad Habits

**Jacob**

  * Jacob, despite not getting a hard on for his own voice like his brothers do, always finds a way to interrupt people. He’s one of those guys who is constantly finishing off people’s sentences before they can get their words out. Flat out annoyed that their not speaking faster.
  * He’s not a soldier anymore, despite being in a war half the time for trying to defend Eden’s Gate. And that past makes him ansty. He has all this energy he can’t get rid of. Even with his morning workouts, he feels the need to move during the day. So he walks around and cracks his knuckles endlessly. Not only does the sound make Joseph sick, but it scares the shit out of people.
  * He’s not trying to be intimidating, but he stands around all imposing, cracking his knuckles as you attempt to hold a decent conversation.
  * Jacob is a monster in public, he has no realization on what might be considered wrong to do with others around. Which is why, after a hefty meal of (Probably) meat, he picks his teeth. Right in front of people. Not bothering to explain as they talk to him and he jabs his fingers around in his fucking mouth. Bonus points if he goes in for a handshake to say ‘see you around,’ or just past them on the shoulder with saliva covered hands.
  * To some extent all the Seeds may have to had dealt with this, but Jacob never grew out of it. He’d have a problem with chewing and eating too fast. Shoveling food in with barely enough time to breathe. And not for the reasons of him being a behemoth of a man, but because of his childhood. The book of Joseph stated clearly that when money was spent, it was spent on alcohol, not food.
  * There’s still some deep rooted fear that he won’t know where his next meal is coming from.
  * John was young and never really had a chance to form that habit. The Duncans were rich and never used starvation as punishment anyway.
  * Joseph was homeless for some time, but he had a job at one point. And a wife and child, he was supporting himself somehow.
  * But Jacob had to fight at juvie, where kids are cruel and could steal everything you had, including your food. Then came the war, and out there in the desert, their were slow paced air drops when food was running sparse and the meals weren’t coming quick enough.
  * Not to mention how he almost starved to death before he ate Miller. The man knows hunger. And when he feels hungry, he rushes to get food and barely tastes it as it goes down. He has definitely bit his tongue a few time from this ordeal, he ever drew blood once.



**John**

  * I feel like all of John’s bad traits would be self destructive. Like chewing on his nails. As much as he prefers to look perfect 100% of the time, with expensive clothes and perfectly coiffed hair, he doesn’t even bother getting a manicure. He’ll end up chewing his nails down until they’re all crooked and janky.
  * Most of the time he’s getting sick from shoving his disgusting hands in his mouth.
  * John does paperwork, he’s a lawyer trying to make sure no one gets thrown in jail and he’s a busy guy. So his desk is crowded with documents and from this, he always has a pen tucked away somewhere. Whether in the pocket of his jeans or clipped onto his shirt and sometimes, if he’s stressed enough, it’ll wind up behind his ear with his hair ruined and tousled. He’s constantly clicking that pen.
  * God it gets annoying. The Seed family is having dinner and he’s sitting there clicking that fucking pen over and over again. Not realizing the death glare Jacob is sending his way.
  * He also chews on the pen when he can no longer chew on his nails. Not like he replaces his cheap pen, which cost like $2. No, he carries around a pen with a bunch of teeth marks in it.
  * Whenever John gets hurt, which is too often really, he can never let the wound heal. He’s always picking at it. Tearing at skin long before it can scab over. When he was young, it was a form of extra punishment. Now he just likes the way it feels, it brings this rush of strange pleasure he can’t get from anywhere else.
  * John has a habit of eavesdropping too. He wasn’t a successful lawyer because he knew how to play fair. No, when someone is speaking in his near vicinity he can’t help but tune in. Most of the time it’s pointless chatter, but it excites him. He likes to walk by and hear snippets of conversation...and then get backtracked on what he was supposed to do just to conspicuously hang around to hear more.



**Joseph**

  * Joseph grinds his teeth together to no end. He’s a stressed man, in charge of an entire county. He’s scared and nervous. And with no way to get out that stress he grinds his teeth. Making John yell at him for needing to find another dentist--because that’s difficult in a war zone.
  * He does it so unconsciously. But it gets worse when he’s anxious. His teeth are about to fall out and hurt so bad from doing it. He’s sure he does it in his sleep, seeing from when he wakes up sometimes he finds his tongue swollen and the inside of his cheek sore.
  * Joseph constantly has to fix his little bun thing he has going on because he’s always tugging at his hair. Which ends in his hair becoming weak and makes him rip his hair out. Than that transforms into something almost therapeutic but dangerous for obvious reasons.
  * Joseph should have a bald spot by the end of Far Cry.
  * He is a natural listener. He has to be, it’s in his job description. And while not necessarily a bad habit, it annoys John to no end with how Joseph will encourage others to continue with soft ‘ahhhs’ and ‘mhms.’ Joseph claims it’s to show he’s paying attention, but it’s a constant thing he does no matter what conversation he’s holding and it makes John want to drive his head into a wall.
  * You can’t convince me that Joseph doesn’t leave the toilet seat up. He just...doesn’t understand why he’d put it down, even with a woman in his house/life. He’d look so confused if someone were to mention it to him. Just sorta shrug and say ‘but can’t you push it down? It goes both ways, up and down, you know.’ Of course his brothers don’t mind too much, they get it. But god forbid if you were to live with him.
  * He’s gotta have bad posture. That image is something that fits with him. And something that John chastises him about constantly. He’s in chronic pain and does not fight John when he somehow tracks down a masseuse specially for Joseph. 




	29. Headcanons Body Worship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seeds' reactions to Rook body worshipping them

**Jacob**

  * It happens when he’s in the shower. Trying to scrub away the blood from whatever poor soul wandered on his path. The bathroom door is opened half way, and really that must have been an invitation for her to join him.
  * So, of course, she does exactly that. She notices how haggard his face is and that he looks so, so tired. It breaks her heart a little. Makes her squeeze in from behind so she can hug him around his waist. She presses her cheek to his back, not at all bothered in how he keeps on bathing like she isn’t even there.
  * Jacob doesn’t care for intimacy, never has. He knows how much loving someone can hurt. That it will always lead to pain sooner or later.
  * He just glances over his shoulder and shrugs it off.
  * He’ll give some comment to show how uncomfortable he is
  * “Having fun back there?” or “I didn’t really ask for help, Kitten.” She’d roll her eyes at how thick he always is, because she was trying to pour out all her love into that moment and he has to ruin it by being so bull headed.
  * She ends up being the one to wash his back for him. Kissing everywhere where the soap once was. Standing on tiptoes to kiss at his neck.
  * That soft touch makes him flinch. He wasn’t used to it, and he didn’t want to make it a habit. Not when she could be gone one day.
  * His fear of letting people in is so obvious it physically pains her. Which is why she makes it a habit to continue worshipping every inch of him.
  * She’d catch him in the morning before he had to get up to manage his people, where he’d lie still and she would pay him compliments that would only serve to make him squirm.
  * But mostly it would happen again and again in the shower. To the point where he’s expecting it and asks her if she forgot whenever she didn’t join him. She simply doesn’t go in everyday because she knows Jacob and she figures he values his space and his alone time.
  * Really though he’s starting to trust one more person other than his brothers. He seeks out her affection when they’re alone. He wants to have someone who worships him, even if he’s still afraid she’ll break his heart. The poor man is only starved for emotion.



**John**

  * It’s not something he really expected, so when he wakes up and Rook is hovering over him, he freezes. Gives her a deer in the headlights sort of look.
  * Acts sarcastic and flirtatious the entire time to hide how inexperienced he is in this department. “Oh? And what’s this? Something to confess? He’ll be all jokes about lust and sin, mistaking the look in her eyes, until she starts moving really slow. Almost hesitant.
  * And John cannot handle slow. He just can’t. Everything in his past tells him this is strange, not at all right. So he lays back extremely awkwardly as she trails down his body. Kissing each scar and tattoo, whispering praise he’s never heard.
  * He wants to touch her so bad, finding it way too difficult to trust someone enough to treat him kindly. He starts reaching up to grab her, to shift her weight from how she was straddling him so she could press down on where he was hard. “Just let me Rook…I can...” winds up getting his hands batted away.
  * When he starts to see the sunrise peak through his curtains, he panics. He feels the beginning of sloth. But Rook quiets him down. Pushes on his shoulders to lean over and kiss his cheek.
  * Despite her words he never truly calms down. He’s still tense throughout the whole thing. When was the last time he felt as if someone loved him? He feels unworthy and so, so undeserving. Rook can see that in John’s eyes.
  * It’s a shame that someone had the audacity to break the kind hearted boy he once was.
  * She doesn’t let the pity show on her face. Which John was careful to look for every time she pulls away from his chest. 



**Joseph**

  * It happens in his church, and really Joseph can’t complain. Not when she was worshipping him in such a holy place. This was God’s house (where else would be better than that?) and he has such a willing woman kneeling between his legs, it’d be a sin to deny her.
  * So he doesn’t discourage it. But he doesn’t speak to guide her.
  * He’s more focused on how pretty she looks. And he’s curious about what kind of intentions she had. Because right away he can tell this isn’t a sex thing. She didn’t like a slow build up.
  * Yet here she was, tracing his scars and kissing at each mark he had.
  * It doesn’t make him uncomfortable per se, but he can’t help but squirm.
  * Especially when he gets hard not even ten minutes in.
  * “What is your plan down there Rook?”
  * She laughs so softly that it actually scares him. Until she is kneading her hands into the flesh of his thighs and he goes boneless where’s he sat.
  * It’s like some kind of therapy for him where he can feel utterly safe just closing his eyes and letting her move him around like a doll.
  * He won’t ask her to do it again, because he feels like that moment between them was something special that shouldn’t be spoken about.
  * But inevitably she does it again. And again. Until it becomes a monthly ritual that makes him jittery with anticipation.
  * He’s probably the only one who would return the favor. Without being good at it though because he’s only experienced what Rook has done to him. So his cheeks are pink while he tries to worship her like she did to him, and he makes a fool of himself but the effort was there and him being shy for once was new. Which was actually really cute and something Rook didn’t object to at all




	30. Headcanons Suicide

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Seeds cheat, Rook kills herself. Their reactions

**John**

  * John breaks. After everything he’s been through, this tragedy is what drives him over the edge.
  * He gets real quiet, just starts avoiding everyone. His brothers, his sisters, even his faithful. No one hears from John for awhile. Doesn’t answer the door either, so when his family knocks, only trying to check on his well being, he outright ignores them.
  * He prays. Gets real introspective all of a sudden. Trying desperately to find answers as to why God is intent on making his life hell.
  * Eventually, when he comes back to the project, ready to carry out his duties, it goes one of two ways.
  * On one hand he could get even more wrathful. His methods of doing baptisms and taking confessions gets more harsh. He’s less forgiving, more cynical, less likely to care about others.
  * However, it could go the complete other way. He would change, switch from being cruel to suddenly sweet. People would fear Eden’s Gate, but the most pleasant experience would always be with the baptist. He smiled more, even if it looked forced 90% of the time. He would be timid, humble, taking confessions the way the rest of the world did.
  * Chances are though, he’d never love again.
  * There would be too much guilt along with the feeling unworthy to be cared for.



**Jacob**

  * If anything Jacob gets more cruel once he learns about Rook’s suicide.
  * He expects more from his prisoners soon to be soldiers. And though he won’t admit it to anyone, that’s only because he hopes to find someone else like Rook.
  * The one thing that’s going to mend his broken heart just a little is a replacement. Even if it wouldn’t work completely, it would help distract him.
  * The fact that he barely acknowledges that Rook is dead, gone because of his transgressions, makes his family worried. Though he’ll snap at whoever mentions her.
  * And you bet he’ll skin the man or woman who speaks ill of her. If there’s one of his soldiers talking trash of ‘the sinner who invaded their garden,’ he’ll make them wish he would give them a quick death.
  * If he does get lucky enough to find someone who reminds him of Rook, he won’t be the caring man he was to Rook. He’ll treat that one like a pet, keeping them locked away so that never have a chance to leave him.



**Joseph**

  * The first thing that hits him is the guilt. He drowns in it. He might even try to kill himself, an eye for an eye and all that. He doesn’t care that it’s a sin--he knows he owes it to Rook.
  * He starts to doubt his position at Eden’s Gate. He was unfaithful, he crossed a line and lost the one he thought he was meant to be with for the rest of his life. So why does he deserve to lead the rest of his children?
  * He’s really the only one who would take the time to grieve. He knows it’s what's best, that there's no way he can return as The Father with a heavy heart. 
  * He does his best not to forget about Rook, trying to keep her alive in his memory. Sharing stories when the opportunity presents itself however many years down the line.
  * Might even ask John for a tattoo of Rook, or something that relates to her.
  * Joseph bounces back quick though. He has encountered loss before. He knows how to deal with it. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh.




	31. Sex Regret Headcanons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seed brothers reacting to finally getting Rook to have sex with them...only for her to immediately start crying after in regret/disgust

**Jacob**

  * He isn’t ignorant or naive. He knows why she broke down, why she started sobbing moments after he rolled off her to grab a towel to clean his cum off her stomach.
  * This was nothing more than a spur of the moment thing, just a way to blow off steam. So no, he didn’t much care to coddle her. Or to reassure her.
  * The most he’ll do is toss a blanket her way to cover her up and offer her his bed for a single night so she won’t have to spend it alone in a cage.
  * He won’t ask if she wants to talk about it though, because he wanted this to be easy. And emotions are rarely ever easy. Besides, he doesn’t know if he did something wrong per se, or if he unearthed memories that made her break down.
  * Whatever the case, he didn’t want to get too deep into her shit. He figured she’d be fine by the morning.



  
  


**John**

  * John thinks he did something wrong. That somehow she doesn’t love him, as if their one night having sex meant something more than it was.
  * So immediately he jumps on her. Just cradles her to his chest and rocks her back and forth, cooing in her ear. Telling her of all that they can be together.
  * The poor man wants love, and he thought he found it.
  * He doesn’t let her leave, insisting that she stays the night--or hell! How does a month sound?
  * Come morning, he’s hesitant to leave, afraid that she’ll up and run when he only wants to explain how what they did wasn’t wrong at all. So obviously he doesn’t leave his house for days until it gets suspicious and he lags far behind in his work.
  * Though by then he feels as if she understands, that maybe she doesn’t hate him or herself. John gets it in his head that they can get whatever this is to work.



**Joseph**

  * Joseph is bound to act all high and mighty. Angry at God instead of Rook, or the obvious culprit (himself)
  * He doesn’t let her leave, will go as far as to pin her underneath him with orders for guards to stand at his door if that’s what it takes.
  * He only feels as if she needs time. She came to him once, yearning for love and affection of their bodies intertwining, she’ll come to him again; emotionally that is.
  * Joseph is convinced she is apart of the family now
  * Not only that but he believes that this is the final hurdle before the Collapse. After this, everything will fall into place and they can finally start their new life.




	32. Obsessive (pt 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook and Staci are called on a situation with the project and all the Seeds show unusual interest in her. He gets protective and drags her out of there.

“What do you make of them?” Rook wondered aloud, eyes drifting momentarily from the manilla folder in her hand over to where Pratt sat behind the wheel. She tracked the low dip of his eyebrows and the harsh line his mouth made before she focused again on the words in front of her.

Three men that were too high profile for the small, quiet town Hope County had always been.

Pratt veered the police cruiser a little too sharply, exhaling dramatically like he didn’t know the answer. But he did, she saw it in his eyes when she managed to catch them. “Depends on which one you’re talking about.” He mumbled, coming off shy in a way he’s never been, almost as if he didn’t want to muddle her opinion before she got a chance to meet them.

She flipped through the folder one last time as he turned the radio down just when he put the car into a grungy parking lot. She committed those names and faces to memory, wanting to get this right, to know who she would be talking to. The call to the station wasn’t specific. Just mentioned a public disturbance at a local dive bar the other night. Some guy on a soap box getting under people’s skin. With the added benefit of threats being thrown around to rile the crowd up. The only reason the cops weren’t called—added eyes on a business wasn’t good publicity.

“Ready?” Pratt looked nervous, maybe for her. Probably thinking right about now that he would’ve been better off paired with Hudson, or even Nancy, not some probie still learning the ropes that he had to babysit. Hell, she’s never even had to arrest anyone yet.

Rook tried to appear confident in her answer, it sounded weak to her own ears though, her gentle, ‘sure,’ could have been more gruff, more assertive. She wanted him to think that she was anything but soft. That she could handle dealing with these people that so many officers had stories about back at the station.

He was the one to get out of the car first, to motion her to follow him and let him talk as she tagged along behind. It was a watch and learn sort of day considering who they were dealing with.

The gate lining the perimeter was imposing, a force of nature that made her knees feel weak. The barbed wire that laced around the top wasn’t exactly suspect, that was normal enough for Hope County. A place stock full of preppers and hunters that Eden’s Gate setting up camp didn’t make anyone bat an eye.

At first.

Until they began to stir up trouble. Until reports of their members being a little too enthusiastic about their leader popped up, that they were ready to declare war if a bad word was even said about the man.

They were religious zealots was all. Probably harmless. So no, she wasn’t scared and she was more than ready. It was just a couple questions, all that was needed was to ask whoever was in charge if they were aware of the problems Eden’s Gate members were causing with the locals in town. If they knew the numerous assault charges already stacked against them.

All it took was a flash of a badge and they were in. Surrounded with people in ragged clothing staring them down like they were the ones causing trouble. She offered them smiles, throwing out tiny waves only to be stopped with a hand catching her wrist. Staci shot her a look, one that made her stomach churn uneasily.

He really didn’t trust these people, did he?

The walk up the path towards the looming building was grueling. The silence between her and Staci so damn unnatural for his character. But at the same time, he didn’t seem truly scared. Only cautious. Keeping his body in front of her when he took the initiative to swing open the doors leading them inside.

“Let me do the talking, yeah Rook?” He mumbled, eyes swinging wildly around, locking onto the various people scattered around inside. Staci walked around like he owned the place, shoulders drawn back as their feet hit the linoleum.

“Who’s in charge here?” She asked softly.

“Jacob Seed. Took this run down hospital and turned it into--” he waved his hand around, towards people leaning against walls and sorting crates that she couldn’t see into. “Whatever the hell this is meant to be. He’s the only one who’s not actively trying to dodge me, so we’re talking to him.”

“Without a lawyer present? C’mon deputy Pratt, you should know better.” The voice that came behind them made her skin crawl. She flinched, twirling on her heel, hands itching to reach for her gun. “Easy there deputy...Rook, is it? No one needs to get all jumpy.”

Jacob Seed--she’s never met the man, but she saw the pictures hidden behind a manilla folder marked with his name. She tried to reach inside her mind for every bit of information she read on him, for everything that Hudson warned her about the beast that Jacob was.

He caught her staring, eyes leaving where Staci stood close behind her and smiled at her. Holding out a hand for her to take. Should she?

She glanced back at Staci. “Are we following him?”

“To where a lawyer waits.” Jacob confirmed before Staci could answer. “My brother heard about your coming here, word travels quickly. C’mon, you wanna talk, we’ll talk.”

Then Staci was in front of her again, a hand reaching behind him to grab at her own sweaty palm. He squeezed once, a reassurance of some sort.

Waiting for them, just as promised, was Jacob’s siblings. The same ones that she saw pictures of on computer screens, listing out their history below. Showing off every injustice and every step of their lives. Sad stories, all of them. It made her chest pang something fierce as she locked eyes with them. As if she could try to convey how sorry she was, that she didn’t want to be here either, she didn’t want to persecute them.

Though if their history served right, John would make sure that never happened. He was good at what he did. Dapper too, sporting slicked back hair and a polished shoes that didn’t fit in with the half reconstructed room they stood in.

“These are the deputies we’ve been waiting for?” John asked, though he was focused solely on her. Tipping his head like a puppy as he stepped forward. She rocked on her heels--fucking terrified of the man--the only thing that stopped him being the one who stood by his side.

Joseph.

Her saving grace despite them being here because of the things he was allegedly doing. He looked worse off than John, like he hadn’t slept in a week. Hair greasy, curling at the ends where they brushed his shoulder. The shirt he was wearing crumpled and wrinkled, so unlike who she pictured doing the awful things people claimed he did.

“It is.” Jacob hummed, rounding in a large circle until he stood behind them both. His fingers trailed along her shoulder blades, dipping down her center and outlining her spine. The action made her tremble, had her breathing out heavily through her mouth. “Sit kids.” He commanded, shoving her forward, a hand now on her neck to lead her to a chair.

If he noticed Staci’s death glare he simply ignored it. Whistling a tune she didn’t recognize as he sat across from them with his siblings. And if Staci noticed that she was the focal point of the rest of the Seeds, then he was too busy making sure Jacob kept his distance.

“What seems to be the problem this time?” John’s cynicism didn’t sit well with her, especially when it was directed at Pratt, like he was wrong for following up on the multiple reports they’ve gotten.

“It’s simple,” Staco began, eyes meeting hers before settling back on John, “We’ve had many complaints of...suspicious activities.”

“What constitutes suspicious?”

“Arriving fresh off two bus loads full of people and buying up abandoned plots of land all over the mountains for starters.” Rook cut in, nose wrinkling out of anger. John just smiled at her though. And it lacked faux sympathy, he almost looked like he was actually listening to her, that he was taking her words and concerns into account, as if it would be awful if she was ever inconvenienced by the things they did.

Joseph leaned forward, a hand reaching out to rest on her knee, “I suppose that would make people wonder about us. But we mean no harm. It seemed as if my family could build our foundations where others left. No one was looking at the land we’ve bought so far, if we’ve stepped on anyone's toes, we apologize.”

Rook blinked back at him. Absolutely surprised at the sincerity in his voice. It made her reciprocate the gesture, leaning towards him and nodding along with his words.

Staci clearing his throat pulled her back, along with the hand on her shoulder that jerked her back into the chair. “So far? The land you’ve bought so far?”

Her eyes widened. Whitehorse was right, Staci was good police, catching Joseph’s words the way he did.

“We have around a hundred people to house.” Jacob explained, moving into a crouch beside her chair, a hand draped over her shoulders. “We need places to put them and their families. They rely on us, we can’t leave them high and dry, deputy.” Then, almost as an afterthought, “I don’t see the crime here. Nothing we’ve done is illegal.”

“There’ve been reports of missing people.” Staci went on, hands scrambling to grab at the folder he brought in with him. He opened it wide, grabbing at pictures and files to display. “And their families are worried about their wellbeing. After all, they were last seen with your church. Kidnapping and murder are crimes.”

“Murder!” John barked, turning it into a laugh. “These are heinous, baseless accusations. I’ll have you sued for slander.”

No, no, no. This was exactly the kind of thing Whitehorse told them to avoid. They didn’t want to get on the Seeds’ bad side, a legal battle was the last thing they wanted. She reached for Staci, a comforting hand on his bicep. “Leave it Stace. We came to talk, and we talked. I’m sure the Seeds’ will be more...aware, of their people’s whereabouts from here on out.”

Joseph’s face fell as she rose, making Staci follow her movements. His brows were scrunched, gaze flicking between his brothers. “Deputy.” He mumbled, rising after her, fingers reaching to grab onto her wrist before she could leave the way they came. “I’m sorry. We all are. And...If I may offer you dinner with my family, to at least make up for the trouble we’ve caused in our little time of being here. Besides,” he added with a crooked smile--one that showed her how this man could be so appealing to lead people across the country, “you’ve yet to meet our sister, and I know she’d adore you.”

“Rook.” Staci warned, meaning ‘absolutely not.’

But he was hitting her with puppy dog eyes and John was pouting behind him, head tipped to the floor. And the mere presence of Jacob to her left, now standing at his full height, was enough to make her nod in agreement.

Staci dragged her out of the room half a second later, a scowl settling into place as John shouted after them that he’d be happy to pick her up at the precinct.

“Are you crazy?” He hissed, “Going into their home, alone!?”

She shook him off, noticing how people were making way for them, seeing the anger both of them were radiating. “I don’t see the big deal. We should play nice for now, or the rest of our time here will just be awkward with them.”

“So? Don’t you see how fucking crazy they are. They were all ogling you like you were a piece of meat.”

She laughed, slotting herself into their cruiser, letting him drive again. “They’re from the south.” She smiled, recalling the subtle accents of the eldest and the baby, Joseph having the most prominent tang in his voice. “It’s just southern hospitality. They were being nice.”

“They’re creepy. Way too obsessed with you, just...stay away Rook.”

She scoffed, settling her chin on the open palm of her hand to look out the window. Right where she could see John on the upper floor. He smiled when he saw her staring, perking up noticeably. He waved like a child, his whole body shaking with the movement.

She couldn’t help but wave back, lips tipping up. Their family was targeted because of how different they were, because the suddenness of their trek across the country seemed unnatural. She understood. Them and her were alike in that manner. She came from Arizona for fuck’s sake and was met with endless pestering.

They’d get along fine.


	33. Headcanons Period

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook on her period headcanons

**John**

  * John tries to hide his ignorance, he truly means the best and he hates to see Rook in pain
  * But he just doesn’t...get it??
  * He tries everything known to man (He googled it) from tylenol to heating pads, going as far as massaging her stomach despite her protests. He ultimately gets frustrated that he can’t take her pain away
  * Ends up staying in bed a little later than usual on bad days
  * When they're out and about and she winces in pain from her cramps he’s right by her side asking if there's anything he can do
  * Will not hesitate spending tons of money on the best pads or tampons he can get his hands on. 
  * Gets to the point where, after hours of research and listening to Rook he gets mad at ‘The Man.’ “Really, dear, why are they so expensive. You _need_ them. This is an injustice.”



”I’m right here, dear. I know you’re in pain, and yes, I know I’m getting on your nerves. But it’s all because I love you. You know that, right? I’d walk to the end of the earth to take your discomfort away.” 

**Joseph**

  * He’s been through this song and dance before, he’s well practiced.
  * He doesn’t need her to explain a thing. He understands what she needs.
  * Joseph still keeps his patience. Even when she snaps at him for no reason. He keeps his cool and takes whatever words she hurls his way. People act in different ways when they’re in pain
  * Probably the only one to suggest free bleeding though. Doesn’t at all get why she laughs
  * Will wait on her hand and foot if that’s what she needs
  * He’ll preach to her while she’s curled up in bed trying to block out the sun and ignore the cramps. He’ll go on and on about how _important_ this process is. How she, like all women, are serving such a noble, greater purpose that men can only _dream_ of fulfilling
  * Makes her feel as if she should be honored to bleed each month
  * Him speaking like that makes her throw pillows at his face on multiple occasions



“Oh, Rook. Look at you. It’s okay, here, come here, love. I’ll lie with you, I’m sure the others can survive without me for one day.”   
  


**Jacob**

  * He’s upfront about it. Doesn’t get squeamish or think she’s being weak when she’s in pain. He understands nature, doesn’t need to be told twice that this is normal. That nothing he could do could take her discomfort away fully 
  * But he wants to. Even if he doesn’t show how much he feels her pain, he aches to do something
  * Will let her sleep in for once. It might take some extra convincing but he’ll stay in bed with her for an extra 30 minutes just to massage a hand low on her belly whispering soothing words to her
  * At first he’s all for her not taking any pills whatsoever. He gets angry when she suggests it. She’s so damn strong, she could be on deaths door and wouldn’t take a single antibiotic. And now she wants some?
  * It isn’t until he sees how miserable she is that he relents
  * Might joke around once or twice that he’d be glad to help her conceive a kid just so she won’t have to suffer through her period for 9 months



”Just rest for now, pup. Take a breath. You’re strong, you’re gonna be fine. I know it hurts, just breathe for me. Take a break for today, I’ll be back by tonight and maybe if I’m feeling nice I’ll scrounge up some chocolate for you.” 


	34. Headcanons Irregular Period Cycle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook going through an irregular cycle of her period and having to explain that her taking birth control is 100% normal and not just for sex.

**Jacob**

  * Jacob won’t coddle her. Far from it. But he doesn’t have a cold heart. And seeing Rook in pain makes him break inside. 
  * Especially when he sees how bad it gets. 
  * It’s the amount she eats that draws his attention first, he even pokes fun at her for it. He doesn’t mind feeding her, quite the opposite, it soothes some part of his animal brain to see her satiated. 
  * But then he sees her wince throughout the day, a hand held to her head. Barely able to concentrate on the simplest of tasks. 
  * When she nearly collapses is when he draws the line. Yanking her up to his office with a command for her to lie down and demands for her to tell him what’s going on. 
  * “It’s nothing to get all worried about. You have enough on your plate as it is Jacob. I can take care of myself.”
  * But Jacob thinks otherwise. He doesn’t mind taking care of her. Letting her hang around his neck while they sleep or sit on his lap as he does paperwork is fine with him if it offers her the smallest relief. He wouldn’t say it to her face but her being in pain, not so resilient, makes him feel needed. Really wanted in a way he hasn’t in a long time. 
  * He might be the only one who doesn’t need to hear her explain her situation of an irregular cycle or birth control. 
  * Part of him doesn’t care so long as a baby isn’t involved. 
  * Hardly sees her as weak for needing pills. Hundreds of people take birth control. She just so happens to need it for something other than sex. 



**John**

  * John thinks she’s dying at first. That she’s hiding some illness from him. He gets accusatory fast. Hovering around her and pushing not so slightly, asking time and time again what's wrong with her.
  * He’s scared he’s gonna lose her, that’s what makes his temper rise. 
  * It’s only when she snaps at him that it’s her period making her wonky that he calms down. He breathes out all of once because _she’s fine_. _She’ll be okay, thank God._
  * He’s there for her every step of the way after that. With soothing words despite that not helping at all. 
  * “Why didn’t you tell me sooner, my dear? Did you think I wouldn’t understand? Or that, what? I wouldn’t care?”
  * He doesn’t understand the female body outside of sex really, so this is something he doesn’t know how to deal with. Tries to convince her that he can track down the best doctors for her. To take her pain away. 
  * She laughs at him through the pain eating away inside her uterus. Pulling him close to push a kiss to his cheek. His kindness it welcome even if he’s so wrong.
  * He actually gets really upset when he realizes there’s nothing he can do to take her pain away. “If I could make your suffering my own, I would in an instant. Life’s fucking unfair, Rook. I’m sorry.” And on like that until Rook’s sick of hearing his voice. 



**Joseph**

  * When he hears she misses her cycle he’s hesitant to bring it up. Wondering if she noticed—like she wouldn’t realize herself. 
  * In truth he is a mess of nerves the entire time. 
  * Is he going to be a father maybe? The thought both terrified and excited him. He’s been called a father for years, but the children of his flock and an actual blood related child is different. 
  * He 100% deflates when she tells him, “It’s just the birth control, Joseph. Makes my cycle irregular.” 
  * He masks his disappointment well after he sees her pain. 




	35. Befriending Them [pt 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook’s new in town and accidentally befriends the Seeds. She doesn’t realize her mistake until she wakes up in a dark cell.

“You think it’s a good idea? Letting her handle this guy? She’s so green.” 

Rook pretended not to hear Staci speak about her directly behind her back. Like literally. She was only a barstool lengths away. Maybe he thought he was being quiet. Or maybe he just didn’t care. Bastard got turned down and now he was perfectly fine with voicing her inexperience to the whole of the bar. 

Rook but her tongue and sat patiently with her own beverage of choice, despite the teasing her margarita had garnered, trying to ease her way into the tight circle they had formed years before she showed up. 

Staci didn’t like her much, that she knew. Didn’t trust her after the leak the sheriff's department had to deal with that got one of their own killed. It almost felt wrong to fill those shoes. But Joey had been kind enough to invite her out for drinks the first night of her move and she couldn’t refuse when her own fridge was empty and her bed wasn’t even put together and the couch hadn’t come in yet, nor the tv. Their company was better than the alternative. 

Besides, she’d tolerate sleeping on her wooden floors much more when she was shit faced. 

“Shut it, Stace.” 

Rook sipped her drink. Watching the scene in front of her unfold. Content to let her colleagues sort out what to do. She was a probie. New to the field of Montana and all its craziness. 

This was their problem. She was just another patron who was wondering what the man on his soap box was going to say next. Because, impressively so, he was standing on what a literal soap box. Occasionally getting so utterly lost in his fervor and the spouting of his madness that he’d take a step too far and almost fall. 

But he kept on talking. Voice gaining power as people gathered around him. A mixture of which that seemed to know him and others like her. Bored out of their minds and looking for something to mix up the monotony of the week. 

Though she’d guess most people here weren’t cops and obligated to handle this. She glanced over her shoulder, noting the scowl Joey wore. Hands a tad too tight around her glass. “Want me to get in on this? Do some crowd control.” Her eyes flicked back to said crowd, the ones who looked like their ranting friend. All unkempt and smiling wide. And the two that stood closer than the rest, who looked over the bar like they were daring anyone to lay a finger on their own madman. 

She heard Joey suck on her teeth before speaking. “Nah. Stay here. We’ve dealt with him before.” With a sigh she stood, striding past Rook with a muttered, “nothing ever comes of it anyway.”

Rook cocked a brow, and maybe if she knew them a little better she would’ve asked what that meant. But they were already heading towards the gaggle of people and when Staci passed he gave her a condescending pat on her shoulder, so she kept her mouth firmly shut. 

She couldn’t hear much from where she was sitting. Except that it looked like mayhem. Or a train wreck, she couldn’t look away.

“I thought I introduced myself to everyone in the department.” 

Rook jumped in her seat, would’ve fallen off too if it weren’t for the hand that reached out to steady her. Laying dangerously close to her thigh despite him aiming for her hip. 

The man to her left who appeared seemingly out of nowhere flashed her a reassuring smile. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you, dear.” 

Dear. 

The word sounded right coming from his tongue, a moniker used from the hospitality she never knew back home so far up north. 

“No, no you’re fine. Was more focused on—“ she waved her hand in the direction of the ongoing fight and saw his eyes crinkle at the edges. “That. Kinda distracting.”

“Ah, yes. My brother has always had a flare for the dramatic. Couldn’t just settle for putting up flyers, or, you know, sticking to the chapel.” 

This was small talk, she belatedly realized. This was a show of kindness. An act she hadn’t yet encountered outside of some sort of obligation like Whitehorse had done. 

Rook perked up, eyes flicking between him and the empty seat next to her. He got the hint almost immediately, slipping on the barstool still wearing a tiny smile around his mouth. 

“So, your brother always getting into trouble?” 

“As of late, I’m afraid so. Though I wouldn’t say that’s his fault.”

“No. No I bet you wouldn’t.” 

He laughed. A hearty sound that made heat rise to her cheeks when she glanced around and saw people staring. Boldly he reached forward, touching her again, this time on her shoulder. Now he had no excuse, couldn’t hide it behind the guise of helping. It was intentional. 

“What I meant to say was that the natives of Hope didn’t much like us. Don’t,” he corrected quickly, “they don’t like us. But we’re working on it.” 

“Ah, yeah. Well maybe pulling stunts like this isn’t helping. People just want to get drunk, not listen to whatever he’s talking about. Even if it is like, for abandoned puppies or orphans.”

Again a laugh, though softer this time around. Like a secret he wanted to keep between the two of them. 

Rook wanted to keep talking, she wanted to have some sort of companion before the night was over. That was the point of coming here, accepting Joey’s offer. To make friends and not feel like this move was a waste of time and a huge mistake. So when his eyes flickered behind her shoulder, brows down when voices raised and his leg twitched, a stab of fear hit her low in her gut at the thought of him leaving. 

She touched him this time, a brush of her fingers against his exposed wrist. “So it’s just you and your brother up there?” 

His attention was back on her with her words. And just like that, she relaxed a tad. “No. No there’s one more. The eldest of us, Jacob. Right over there.” He pointed brazenly, leaning off his chair to hover near her, she followed his gaze and the tip of his finger to the man leaning against the far wall surveying the room. 

With a gun attached to his thigh. She sucked in a breath that was audible with him so damn close. “He, uh, got a licence for that thing?”

He fell back into his seat, smiling. “I don’t have to answer that, deputy.”

She huffed, “no. I guess not.” She recounted what Joey had said. That they’ve had run ins with this family. That nothing ever came of it. Whether that meant arrests or warnings she wasn’t sure, but she had a feeling this gun issue was something this man was used to. 

He tapped his hands against the bar in a sort of finality that made her chest ache. “Looks like things are wrapping up, ah,” he jerked his head over her shoulder, making her look. His brother—the eldest he hadn’t named, was approaching where Joey was trying to coax the preacher off his stage. He looked absolutely pissed. 

“That’s my cue I suppose. Not really in the mood to spend the night playing lawyer at your station.” 

He rose with grace, not drunk at all it would seem. Just here to watch his brother. When he passed he ran his fingers across her shoulder blades. “By the way, dear, the name’s John if you ever want to talk again. You seem like all sorts of fun for a cop.”

If Joey or Staci had seen her and John speaking then they didn’t mention it. Too tightly wound up in their own world, rehashing what had just happened. And all the paperwork that would come from it as soon as John entered the scene. 

They spoke with such scorn about him, about his family. It made her stomach church and bile rise to the back of her throat for reasons she couldn’t explain. Which is why she had no problem leaving a moment later when they suggested it. Aware of a set of eyes following her out. 

A full week passed before things kicked off. Enough time for Staci’s bickering to be nothing but playful and for Joey to invite her to hang out and actually mean it. 

She felt confident now, she knew the locals and her way around the law perfectly. She may still be on probation and be the one hanging back while the others took care of things, but she knew her place. 

This was home now. 

Rook’s home was put together beautifully and she was loving life like she never had in the past. She even had friends. 

The Seeds took to that; her need to be accepted. They brought her into their fold quicker than her colleagues had. She knew them inside and out before those she worked with.

John let her talk his ear off when work got too hard and she began having second thoughts, Jacob helped her move her furniture and put together tables when the instructions proved impossible. Joseph was a rock. He cooked meals that sat wrapped up in her fridge when she got home too late to even consider eating anything. He gave her housewarming gifts and offered, on multiple occasions, to be the one to drive her home if need be. And Faith was like the sister she had left behind at home to sort out her own life. She managed to pull a laugh from Rook when she was so drained she forgot how. 

They would always be remembered as her first friends despite the new ones she was making on the daily. Though Joey and Staci disagreed with that. They pulled her closer towards their group in an effort to get away from the Seed family. It was wearing on Rook’s nerves. 

  
“I don’t see what the problem is. They’re nice people. If you’d just spend some time with them…”

“They’re a bad influence.” Staci seethed, like she was a damn child. 

“How? They’ve been nothing but nice. They just want to be accepted and everyone’s pushing them away. Imagine how lonely they must be.”

“They’ve got each other and their congregation, y’know, the people who worship the ground they walk on.”

  
Rook bit her lip, she knew what he was referring to. How the members of their church were overzealous and as persistent as Jehovah's Witnesses. But weren’t most religious folks? She shook her head, eyes flitting towards the file clutched tight in Staci’s hand, papers piled high with the numerous offences the Seeds had in their life. As well as the suspicious gaps in their timeline where they seemingly fell off the map.

She was getting sick of her friends being made to appear like criminals. “I’m not gonna arrest them, Staci.”

“You might not have a choice, the Sheriff's getting a US Marshal flown in. We need the manpower.” 

“A US Marshal!” Now she stood, leaning in towards Staci, palms flat on her desk. “This is ridiculous! You don’t even have the grounds to put them in jail!”

“Not all of them. Just Joseph, It’ll be easier to face a jury when we’re dealing with one. Less factors’ll come into play.” 

“A jury? Staci I don’t like this.”

He shrugged, “no one does.”

But for different reasons. She knew that. Everyone else was scared, afraid that the Joseph’s flock would come at them with baseball bats and rocks if they felt threatened. She didn’t like the thought of the people she came to know so well being made out to be monsters. 

“John’s a lawyer, Stace. No way he’s gonna sit back while you put his brother behind bars.”

“Maybe you can talk to him. Let him know we’re the good guys.”

“It won’t look that way to him. And besides, how close do you think I am with the Seeds? They’re just friends.”  
  


Hudson spoke now, her back was still turned where it was focused on whatever she was typing on her computer. “Oh, c’mon, they adore you.”

“Because I’m one of the few people in Hope County who actually talks to them. In fact, John’s friends with Nick and Kim and I don’t see you grilling them.”

They were both quiet, mulling over her words, wondering maybe if they could trust her judgement. “They’re criminals, Rook. They’ve broken the law once, they’ll do it again. Until one time they do something no one can save them from. C’mon, you’re a cop, you should know this.”  
  
She did, she really did. But they were small petty crimes, and Joseph had come out and told her all about what they’ve done in the past, everything about their lives leading up until now. He hadn’t hid a thing. People in Hope were just paranoid like most small towns folk were. 

Rook wasn’t like that, she came from a different part of the world where you barely knew the person across the street, so yes, she jumped on the chance to be friendly to people who seemed so loss. She wasn’t about to lose her first real friends just because of some highschool drama and a little misunderstanding.

She told them so, more sass in her voice then what was necessary. They ignored her for the rest of the day, let her get on with her work even though the only thing she could think of was that US Marshal coming into town and putting his nose in a situation he doesn’t understand.

*****

“You have nothing to worry about, Rook.” Joseph sounded so calm, she would never understand how he always managed to wear that mask of serenity, even with the news she gave him. The threat of people attacking his family was hardly enough to make him lose his composure. He just smiled that same loving smile at her, assuring her that everything was going to be okay.

“But you do.” She pressed, leaning forward, elbows on her knees, the tea he offered the moment she stepped through his door long forgotten. “Joseph, please. You’re my friend, you and your siblings. I don’t want to see you get run out of town.”

Jacob laughed at that, he hadn’t said a word since she began talking. Content to lean up against the wall to listen with rapt attention. If she didn’t know him any better she would’ve assumed the hard expression he wore meant disinterest. “We aren’t going anywhere, trust me on that.”

Rook’s hands curled into fists, brows furrowing. “How can you be so sure? This is coming from the people who hardly trust anyone.” But me. That part was left out. Because she didn’t know exactly why they had put down their walls to welcome her, but they had, and for that she was grateful. So much so that the thought of losing them tore her up inside. 

“We’re fine, Rook. Besides, we aren’t going to let some petty, baseless accusations make us pack our bags and run with our tails tucked between our legs. Not when we found just what we’re looking for.” He shared a look with Joseph, something she couldn’t place. Though somehow it made the knot of worry unfurl just a tad. 

They were fine. Her life was hardly going to change. 

*****

Rook couldn’t remember what had happened once she left Joseph’s tiny home. Jacob had offered her a ride, which she declined, too amped up and pissed off at what had been said. She was sure she had made it to her car, she recalled that much. Turning her radio on and speeding past the bends, eager to put the whole day behind her.

Then...nothing. 

Just blackness. A hollow void of holes where her memory should’ve been. Everything ached and she wasn’t sure if her body was even her own. She tried to wiggle her toes, checking if everything was in place. She couldn’t tell, nothing seemed to be working. And that thought made her whine. Though she wasn’t sure if anything came out.

“Hush, my dear, you’re safe. No need to panic.” 

“Gonna scare her even more John, leave her be.” 

Rook tried to open her eyes, managing to form little slits that let too much light in. It was too much, the flurry of voices combined with a dull, grating pain she couldn’t place. Finally, fucking finally, she opened her eyes fully. The world was a hazy mess, everything swimming. 

She found John first, mostly by his voice. Aware of the soft cooing noises he was making as she fidgeted on whatever she was laying on top of. 

“She’s waking up, hurry the hell up.” Another voice, not John’s if the annoyed grunt in response was anything to go by. She tipped her head back, sinking into a soft pillow. She took in a metal ceiling and an overhead light before she caught a fiery burst of red.

Hair, her brain helpfully supplied. And of course blue, blue eyes. Scars that stretched on for miles and an unkempt beard. Jacob. That made the knot of worry ease just a tad. Jacob was a familiar face, someone she trusted. A man she’d grown to like. 

“Jacob?”

He didn’t respond, just grasped onto her shoulder and squeezed, making her bones creak. “Stay still, yeah? Don’t want John to mess up.”

“I’m not going to mess up. Been doing this for years. And in worse situations.” 

“Just get back to work.”

With her senses slowly coming back to her she lifted her head and found John hunched over her. Standing off the side and working away with something held tight in his hands. A little tiny thing buzzing away in his hands and making her chest burn. 

“Oh…” She mumbled drunkenly, head falling back down. “Where am I?” Asked because the pain wasn’t too intense, just a distant rumble, nothing at all like what her first tattoo was like. Though she didn't want to harp on that, her mind was someplace else. 

“Safe.” John answered shortly, in such a curt way that she knew not to push.

Rook couldn’t say whether she was kept under John for minutes or hours. By the time she came to, really aware of her surroundings, she was no longer laying in a cold room with a hot lamp blaring down on her. 

“Jacob? John?” Now she was scared, shaking out of her skin as she tried to glance around. She was tucked into a bed, covers up to her chin, everything too hot. Her limbs were heavy, though she was able to get up. 

Her legs immediately gave out, sending her to the floor. That was fine. She could still raise her head and search for some sort of sign of life. “Anyone?” Her hands curled into fists as bile rose in her throat. The room she was in was cold, making a shiver run up her spine. The next thing she noticed was the pain coming from her chest. 

She tugged at the neckline of her shirt to reveal her throat, eyes widening at what she saw. A myriad of tattoos. The symbol she recognized as the one on the vans parked outside Joseph’s church. But that was hardly the least of it. Below that were names. Three of them, surrounded by cartoon hearts that would be cute if she wasn’t so damn scared.

Even from the angle she was at she could clearly read them.

John

Joseph

Jacob

All in different handwriting. Which would’ve been strange if her memory hadn’t came rushing back in a painful wave that had her clutching her temples. 

John had been a constant, always hovering on the edge of her peripherals. Speaking, giving instructions. Giving advice because Jacob had the gun in his hand, one paw on her breast. 

“It doesn’t need to be perfect. It makes it better if it’s really your handwriting. You know, more personal.”

“It’ll look like shit next to yours.”

She remembers peels of laughter from the both of them, or maybe she was imagining it. Everything was still fuzzy. But then Jacob changed to Joseph, worry etched on his face.

“What if I mess up?”

“Joseph…”

“This is permanent.”

“I’m aware. And she’ll understand. Once she comes to love us and see what we’re trying to accomplish.” Then there was a sudden burst of pain as the needle seared into her skin again. She jerked under him, consciousness coming back in spurts. 

“Shh, Rook. Breathe.” There was a sharp prick of a different pain, a needle sliding into her skin, right at her neck. And just like that the world faded again.

She broke down and cried on the floor hunched over. Probably such a pathetic sight. No, no that couldn’t be right. Her memory had to be wrong. They wouldn’t do that to her. Not in a million years. 

But this was real. The pain that radiated from her body told her that. And she had a feeling this was her reality from here on out. She could kick and scream...but no one would hear her.

This was life.


	36. Trapped Together

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seed brothers share Rook after they all get trapped together in a bunker

The screaming wasn’t helping. Then again, neither was Joseph’s fervent praying, but she only had one mouth and enough of a sense to be able to tell one of them to stop. She chose John, for obvious reasons after all the hell he’s put her through. So yes, she did yell a little bit more than she had to. 

“Just focus on the damn road, deputy.” 

That’d be Jacob, she didn’t need to glance back to check. His familiar growl had her gripping the wheel that much tighter to do as he asked. He was right, this was a case of life or death. The world was literally ending around them, trees falling and fire raining down to spark against the exterior of the car when it hit its mark. 

There was a good chance they wouldn't survive this at all. Meaning that she had the rest of her life to tell John to shut the fuck up because she didn’t need her last moments to be filled with his panicked cries.

Jacob didn’t take kindly to the harsh words directed at his baby brother. He went as far as to grab at her shoulder in his position from the backseat. He squeezed tightly and shook her, nails digging in until she had to grit her teeth from the pain. 

“You handle the road and I’ll handle my brother. Got it?” 

She nodded, too distracted by the wildlife darting in and out of the trees to tell him off. Though she noticed that he left Joseph’s name out of his mouth, like he wasn’t as unhinged as the rest of them. Like his prayers--steadily growing louder by the minute--was nothing to be concerned about. 

“Where are we headed, Jacob?” He had told her about a half a dozen times. They argued about it for far too long when they piled into the car and she happened to be the one to slip into the driver’s seat. He had told her, time and time again, that she was to go to John’s bunker. It was the closest.

Except now she wasn’t quite sure they were going to make it there in time. “Jacob, where?” She risked a glance back again, catching Jacob’s eyes; and her heart broke at what she saw. He was cradling John against his chest like they were children again. Mumbling words she couldn’t hear. Occasionally he pushed John’s head into the crook of his neck, unwilling to let his brother see the fire that was raging just beyond the metal safety of their rickety, stolen car.

“Jacob I can’t…”

He heard the desperation in her voice and finally met her gaze in the rear view mirror. “I know. Fuck.” His hands tightened on John’s vest, wrinkling the material in his grasp. “I don’t know. I don’t know the valley like John does, I don’t know of another bunker--I can’t ask him. He shut down.” There was panic behind Jacob’s eyes. The fear of death?

But that couldn’t be right. Rook remembers a time when he told her he wasn’t afraid of dying, that he didn’t give a shit whether he lived or died. It was his brothers, she understood that much. He couldn’t risk seeing them go in such a painful way.

She swallowed past the lump in her throat and hit down on the accelerator. Praying to Joseph’s God that they’d make it in time.

It only could've been three minutes to find the bunker she did, though it felt so much longer when she was shaking from fear. Her mind was on overdrive through it all, eyes scanning the scene outside the windshield, trying to find cover. Some kind of safety. There was an abundance of bunkers in Hope County, this shouldn't be so hard. 

It was smaller than she would’ve liked. A tiny thing that barely popped up from out of the ground. But it would do. It had to. They had run out of time. Three minutes later and they were out of fucking time.

“Here. Jacob we gotta go here.” There was a pause, an answer in the form of another bomb going off somewhere behind them. “Jacob! Now, let’s go!” Rook knew he was itching to leave. Eager to make a dash from the car, but he was focused on John. Eyes fluttering briefly to Joseph, knowing he wouldn’t move so easily. That he was rooted to the spot with his prayers.

“I’ll help.” She persisted, tearing off her seat belt to swivel in her seat. “I’ll help you but I need another pair of hands.”

Jacob nodded, but she wasn't sure he actually heard her. He sat still, running a hand through John’s hair, mumbling what she hoped were words urging him to move. 

Rook should leave them. Run to that bunker and wait and see if they follow. She shouldn't care. They'd probably tear each others throats out if they were forced into the same small enclosed space with nowhere to go.

Unlike them though, she was a human. Her heart--too damn large for her own good--was what made her rise through the ranks in the resistance. So she hardly gave it a second thought when she hopped out of the car and didn't make a beeline for the bunker.

The passenger side door was _ hot.  _ The burning metal seared the leather right off her glove and kissed her skin. Made it bubble and filled her nose with the scent of burning flesh. She yelped, but held on tight and gave the door one final tug to pop it open. 

It seemed like Joseph wasn't completely comatose. His eyes darted up, flinching back from the heat she let into the car. 

“We gotta go.” She breathed, whispering softly with the patience of a saint. “C’mon.” He didn't resist when she unclicked the buckle locking him to the seat, nor did he seem to care when she wrapped her hand around his bicep and yanked him out. 

She wasnt stupid, she knew she wasnt strong enough to manhandle him. That he was moving on his own accord. Not that she was about to complain, she even offered up a grateful smile that felt way too strained to be real.

Rook took a step towards the bunker, all too aware of the fire raging around them, and Joseph didn't move. He was rooted to the spot, staring at the mushroom cloud in the distance. Jumping at the howl of fleeing wolves somewhere off to their right. 

“Joseph--”

“God has spoken to me.”

She blinked at him. And this time she couldn't control the tears that poured out of her eyes. He tilted his head curiously, as if he couldn’t understand why she was breaking down. In a mechanic motion his hand hand lifted to swipe at the wetness on her face. “There's no need to cry, deputy. We’re okay. God has plans for us all, I’ve heard Him. He told me what has to be done with you, that my brothers and I will be eager participants. It's a beautiful thing.” He was cupping her cheek, leaning in close to her. A smile etched onto his face despite the raining embers that must have been burning his skin like they were to hers.

“We won't live to make that prophecy come true if you don't get in there.” She jerked her head towards the bunker, eyes coming to settle back on his serene expression.

“Ah...yes. Right, we should...yes. It's what He wants.” Joseph didn't need more convincing then that, he opened the bunker doors with a hell of a lot more ease than she would've been able to. Holding onto the burning handles and not flinching when she knew it must’ve burnt his skin. She almost wanted to scream in triumph as she watched him slide down the steps with a confident gait. 

Rook breathed out a sigh of relief. At least that was one, if she couldn't get the other two than at least she saved one. 

“Jacob.” She didn't dare get near to the car, too afraid that if she was any further from the bunker that she might not be able to run to safety in time. 

“You said you'd help, deputy. So get your ass over here.” 

Her hands clenched into fists, the burns on her flesh making her recoil. She didn't have to listen to him, despite the growl in his tone that he used to make everyone bow to his will, he had no leverage here.

She could retreat into the underground and she knew he wouldn't follow. He wouldn't let his baby brother die scared and alone, burnt to a crisp while he harbored in safety less than five feet away in a bunker.

“Rook. Please.” 

Despite herself she moved forward. Unused to the kind approach he was taking from a man like Jacob. The pleading that she only heard from desperate civilians. And he did make a pathetic sight, had her heart clenching from pity. 

She was by his side quicker than she thought possible, but that's what the threat of death would do to someone. With nimble fingers she grabbed John by the back of his neck and forced him to look at her. 

His eyes were glazed over, not seeing her properly. Talking wouldn't get them anywhere. It hadn’t so far. “We’re gonna drag him, Jacob. Between the two of us I’m sure we can manage.” For once Jacob didn’t argue, just scooted out of the car real slow, careful to make sure John had his feet under him before taking the first step. It was slow going, something that made her grind her jaw. 

They got there eventually. Just as another bomb went off and sent the three of them tumbling down the stairs at how close the explosion was. She flopped uselessly on top of another body--Jacob--her mind supplied belatedly. To her surprise he didn't toss her off and curse at her like she expected. Instead his hand came to rest on her hip, squeezing before he spoke. “Still with us, deputy?”

She grunted in response, the explosion did more to her than she realized, filling her lungs with smoke and dirtying her clothes. And she hurt her burnt hand on the way down, fucking brilliant.

Jacob helped her off him, glancing at her before he was rushing back up the stairs, taking them two at a time until his hands locked around the handles and he tugged the bunker doors shut. 

The whole world seemed to breathe a sigh of relief at the action. Jacob deflated, eyes fluttering shut before he heard John coughing. Still on the floor. He was at John’s side in an instant. Bringing him to his feet and clapping him on the back. She noted that the fall did at least  _ one _ of them some good. John appeared himself to some extent, even if he looked disheveled, with dust changing his hair color and his fancy coat torn at the edges. 

He was aware of his surroundings and hardly a vegetable any more. She watched him from her position on the ground as he scanned the room. Too damn small for four people, he must've realized that too because his face crumpled. Hands curling into fists by his side.

Despite the rushing in her ears she heard him mumble a soft, “thank you.” She didn't know if that was directed towards her or Jacob so she kept quiet. 

“Good. We’re all here. Like He intended. See, deputy, everything’s working out as it should.” Joseph’s voice was grating. She’d be angry if she already wasn't already drained. Trying to wrap her head around what just happened now that death wasn't an immediate threat. It hit her too quickly, had her curling in on herself because she wasn't ready for this. For John’s mania and Jacob’s terror and Joseph’s prophecies. 

Rook craned her head up when she heard the scuffle of Joseph's feet. He knelt down, placing a hand on her shoulder before she had the chance to react. His other hand came to rest on her cheek, holding her gently. She didn't move, couldn't. Too surprised by the bombs going off and how eerily calm everyone was. Did they not feel the tremors above them? Was she only imagining the screams of other people scrambling to be as lucky as them?

“What?” John spoke for the first time since they hopped into the car--brought together by means of survival. He shook off his coat and tossed it on the ground, a scary, shaky smile adorning his face. He looked half crazed in the emergency lighting of the bunker.

“Yeah, repeat that for us again, Joseph.” Jacob mumbled, scratching at his cheek and strangely avoiding her eyes. It hit her that she must've missed something that Joseph had said. 

“She is our reward. Why else would the collapse come now? When we were all together, when we were just about to speak of terms of peace?”

Rook definitely heard  _ that.  _ And it made her wince. It was hard to believe that only an hour prior her biggest concern was if the Seeds were setting a trap. That really they never quite cared about those peace terms that were vaguely mentioned once before.

And now Joseph thought her agreeing to meet with them was all part of God’s plan.

She was too dazed to care. Shock probably. Which is why she didn't flinch at Joseph's next words.

“We are to show the Lord we understand his message. That we trust His guidance. We must consummate the beginning of a new world.”

John snorted, a hand on his hip. So quickly coming back to himself. Though even in her state she could see that he was still on edge. Tossing fleeting glances at the closed bunker doors. Maybe he was only playing into this as a distraction, to forget momentarily their situation. “So who goes first?” He finally asked, stopping to offer his hand to her.

Perhaps foolishly, she took it. Accepted the warmth he gave off when he pulled her in, close to his chest. She was numb, trying to wrap her head around how they were meant to survive before she really lost her nerve. 

It was Jacob that found the bedroom, two of them--thank god--but he opted to lead them into the one with the double bed. It was hardly nice, only the bare minimum; she took that in before John pushed her back by the shoulders and she fell on the mattress. 

It took Rook a few moments to catch up. For her to realize that Joseph was on her, straddling her waist with a concentrated expression pulling his brows down as he focused on unbuttoning her shirt. Her hands came up reflexively, mouth opening to yell. 

Jacob stopped her. At some point he had climbed onto the bed behind her, and with his bulk and position it was easy for him to clap a hand over her mouth and yank her back towards his chest. 

“Easy there, deputy. Let him work.”

She struggled, eyes widening when Joseph managed to tear her shirt down her shoulders, revealing the lackluster bra she wore underneath. The cold air of the bunker was almost as uncomfortable as John’s hungry gaze from where he stood behind Joseph. 

“Thank you, Jacob,” Joseph murmured, a hand coming to rest gingerly on her covered breast. His thumb swept back and forth over her nipple, eyes just as wide as hers. It made her wonder how long its been since he’s touched someone like this. The thought made her more excited than it should. Though that could very well have been the fact that she was touch starved the same as him.

“John, take off her pants.” Her legs twitched at John’s hands on her skin. Yanking and tugging her leggings until they laid useless on the floor. She turned her head briefly, catching Jacob’s gaze. Stoic now, always willing to follow his brother if it's what makes him happy.

Her whole body felt oversensitive by the time she was fully naked. It was a blur of lingering touches and lustful stares. They weren't as pious as they all seemed. Each of them eager to grab her, to have their own share in God’s supposed plan. 

Joseph at least let her undress him. She reached towards him with shaky hands and pulled him close where he settled between her thighs like he belonged there. With a bowed head of acceptance he allowed her to undo the clasp of his belt and pull at his jeans. She peeled away his underwear, sighing at what she saw.

He was uncut and the textbook image of what a dick should look like. Average length and girth, something that would get the job done as it should. It suited the persona of the Father well. Not like any of that mattered anymore.

John was already naked by the time she turned her eyes up to him. He held his cock in his hand, stroking it with a deathly fast pace that made her wince. He climbed onto the bed when she couldn't keep her eyes off him. A dangerous smile on his lips. If he seemed to mind his brother being just as naked, he didn't show it.

Besides, it was Jacob she was most worried about. She couldn't see him, but she could very well hear him. And she was almost positive that he was just as naked as the rest of them, lingering on the edges of her vision, ready to strike like a snake. 

The sudden feeling of hands grabbing her chest, pulling her into a scarred warm skin confirmed her suspicions. Jacob purred into her ear, leaning so far into her that he was practically folding her body in half. 

The feeling of the three of them touching her all at once was too much. She was shaking, bouncing between them as they fought for her like wolves. Joseph was content to stay between her thighs, kissing at her flesh and teasing her aching cunt. Jacob toyed with her, he stole the most noises from her by far. He tweaked her nipples and sucked on her neck painfully hard. John was everywhere, vying for a spot. He grabbed the meat on her sides and placed his mouth below her navel and above her sex. He ran his fingers through the hair on her cunt, whispering filthy things in her ear to go along with Jacob’s deep rumbling voice.

“You’re breathtaking,” Joseph mumbled, soft enough for only them to hear. His eyes bored deep into her very being and she felt her insides clench in anticipation. “Will you let the Lord guide us, Rook?” His lip twitched into something that was almost an amused smile, “for once in your life?”

She doesn’t answer him, shows her response by taking the time to marvel at him. To roam his body like they were doing to her. Joseph skirted past John, letting his baby brother get close to her heat as he moves to plants kisses like whispers along her jaw like Jacob had done seconds earlier, pausing to graze his teeth over a hickey already forming. “Well?”

“She’ll say yes,” John assures them all. Glancing up from where Joseph once sat between her legs. “It’s what God wants.”

She heard Jacob snort softly behind her, but the way he tightened his hold around her hips said it all. It was a subtle threat not to disappoint his brother.

“Yes.”

The soft, single word she spoke had more impact than she initially realized. It made John groan and bury his face in her cunt, kissing and sucking at her nub. Tongueing at her insides, preparing her for whoever was to go first. Joseph just smiled at her, looking happier than she’s seen him since she’s known the man. He crawled away from her neck, giving that space back to Jacob as he placed hot open-mouthed kisses down her sternum, on each breast, where he sucked her nipples into his mouth. Moving lower and lower down her body, forcing her breaths to come out as labored pants. He treks over a sensitive patch of skin just as John slips out from where he sat to give Joseph access to her sopping cunt. The jolt of electricity that runs through her core makes her grab at his hair and he stops from how she tugs to gaze up at her with a flushed face of his own.

“S-sorry” she breathes. Parting her thighs to relay a message she couldn't quite get out past her lips.

“You’re fine, deputy. You have accepted the Lord and he will reward you greatly,” he ends his sentence by glancing towards the heavens. When he brings his eyes back down he flashes a smile at Jacob, and almost like they rehearsed this whole thing, Jacob pushes her flat on her back. Jacob looms above her, his cock bobbing in front of her face obscenely. It was the first time she got to see him below the belt and she was taking her time, raking her greedy eyes over what she saw. 

Thicker than Joseph by a whole lot. Not the biggest she’s been with, but right now it looked like the most mouth watering thing in the word. He caught the look on her face and chuckled darky, sending a spike of heat through her belly just as Joseph insterted a single finger inside her, roving it around with out of practice hands. Rook’s breath catches, eyes struggling to stay open, lest she lose the perfect view Jacob has given her. Her brow furrows as Joseph manages to slide in another digit. She barely has time to adjust to the stretch when he crooks his fingers just right and she writhes against the sheets. John has moved to the side of her at some point, off to her right, and now he uses his position to place a steady hand on her navel. Pushing her down, as if he’s afraid she’s trying to get away.

“Hush, my dear. Let my brothers treat you.” Jonn leans down to kiss her. The first of them to do so, and it took her by surprise. This was an act of God, not lovers coming to experience the joys of their bodies, so she never expected things to be this intimate. But she didn't shy away from him. She craned her neck up, kissing him harder when he kept moving at a slow, docile pace. Though he was the one to bite her lip and relish in the way she whined when he pulled away.

“Don’t worry, deputy. I’ll have my turn with you yet,” John promised with a wink. “Besides, you're about to be more than full.”

As if to prove John’s point Jacob suddenly grabs her jaw with rough, large fingers and forces her to open wide. His cock dragged along her lip, right where John just kissed. His precum smeared into her skin, teasing her with the idea.

“D’ya want it, honey?” Jacob asked. But she was hardly naive, it wasn't meant to be a question. She nodded anyway though, with a flushed face and a tiny whimper.

They enter her at the same time. If she could, if she didn't have Jacobs cock rammed down her throat, she might throw her head back at the feeling of Joseph bottoming out. 

Joseph’s hips undulate quickly, not at all in time with Jacob’s shallow thrusts. The lack of rhythm makes it all the more delicious. 

“You’re doing so well with us,” Joseph admires with a hint of awe in his voice. With a hard thrust he hits a bundle of nerves deep inside her and manages to drape her body with his leaner one. His forearms rested on either side of her head, and his intentions come clear when he bites again near the marks on her throat. “So wonderful. Isn’t she, Jacob?”

“Fucking gorgeous. Strong too, taking us like she are. Stuffed full.” He hummed at his own words, hands moving from where they were on his hips to her waist, squeezing her ass as best as he could with her on her back. “Not quite, though.”

Rook keens at the praise coming from the both of them. She spreads her legs as wide as they will go, bucking up to meet Joseph’s persistent movements. Her cunt throbs when she sees a flash of John through the tears that started up from how deep Jacob pushed himself. Jonn strokes himself quickly, stopping at times to squeeze at the base of his cock, face forming into one of frustration. 

She rolls her hips once more to meet Joseph’s thrusts and he hits even deeper. Rook manages a tiny, raw sounding moan. Choking a second later from how her lips were stretched wide around Jacob’s cock. 

Jacob pulls out suddenly, letting her catch her breath. He watches her chest rise and fall with panicked breaths, and he couldn't help himself when he went to grope at her chest. Fingers brushing at her nipples to watch her squirm. He traces his cock around her lips, a smile forming when she cursed softly.

Her eyes slammed shut when Joseph grabs onto her hips and lifts her up just an inch to angle himself deeper. Finally, fucking finally, he circles her clit with his thumb in steady strokes that has her seeing stars. He thrusts his cock more desperately, bucking into her like an animal and she whines. Hand flying up to grab at Jacob’s cock like some kind of lifeline. “You’re gonna make me come soon.”

“I intend to, and so will Jacob and then John. We all have a part to play.” His eyes stay on hers, unwilling to break that connection when she reaches her end. 

“Joseph!” And she hates how needy she sounds with just the simple utterance of his name. It does wonders for him though, has him stroking her clit faster as he drives into her to find his own release. He slams into her repeatedly and her cunt begins to tighten. “Oh, w-wait--!”

Her orgasm takes her by surprise. She comes with a high whine, thighs trembling and cunt clenching. Joseph follows soon after but he’s more reserved than she could ever manage. He moans lowly, his body deflating on top of hers. He stills completely. His cock twitching for a last time inside her, her walls milking it of all its cum. Joseph kisses Rook softly on the mouth, not nearly as heated as when John had done the same. 

She doesn't like the fact that when he pulls out she feels empty all over. But that’s something for her to dwell on later. When Jacob’s cock isn’t stuffed in her mouth again, nudging the very back of her throat and making it hard to breathe. 

Joseph says something she can't make out past the blood rushing in her ears as she slowly comes down from her orgasm. He does, however, grant her with another soft kiss and tucks a stray piece of hair behind her ear that will only get dislodged when Jacob drives himself further in her throat. “John, I believe it’s your turn to serve the Lord and give your very best to Rook.”

Rook doesn’t voice her opinion. That she’s too sensitive and more than a little sore despite the fact that Joseph wasn’t that large around to begin with. Even with all those odds stacked against her; her walls quivers at Joseph’s words. At the prospect of more. 

John’s there in an instant. Taking Joseph’s spot with a smile, a flash of white teeth that seems out of place with his dusty appearance. She doesn’t have time to think about how fucked they all are when this high wears off because then he’s on her. He ignores her wet cunt, ignores Joseph’s cum seeping out of her hole and moves up close to kiss her. He can’t latch onto her mouth like he wants, he makes his disappointment know with a heavy sigh. Even with his lips trailing along her jaw the kiss is just as heavy and passionate as it was the last time. 

In spite of herself she grabs a hold of John when Jacob takes his cock out from between her lips. She uses her new found freedom to take his shoulders and pull him closer, her bare breasts brushing against his sweaty skin. Her nipples are too sensitive, and them touching his skin has her whining, spine arching slightly. John holds the small of her back with a tattooed hand, laughing into her mouth when he kisses her again. 

Everything about him is greedy. Batting at Jacob’s own roving hands until the eldest didn’t bother to suppress a snarl. 

“Fucking calm yourself, John,” Jacob snapped, not hesitating to grab her under her arms and yank her into her lap. She went willingly, tired from being fucked so perfectly from Joseph. Jacob’s cock dragged along the curve of her ass and she couldn’t help but lean back into him.

“Brothers. Please. Not now, not when we’ve been blessed. Share her. Take her together.” Rook glances over with hooded eyes, now realizing that Joseph was watching this whole performance. Sitting back in a stray chair with his legs spread wide. Cock still soft between them. 

“Fine,” John bites out. Then, with a devilish smile, “sit on me.” He grabbed his cock to draw her attention. “I want to see you.” 

Rook squirms in Jacob’s hands. Not really surprised when he manhandles her into position. But not the way she was expecting. He lies back and pulls her with him, his cock head bumping dangerously close to her ass hole. 

She shuddered, didn’t even want to think what it’d be like taking his girth in such a tight hole. 

The only thing keeping her from lying down completely on top of him is her forearms, propped against his chest as her legs tangled with his own. 

John huffed, approaching on his knees to grab her ankles and spread her legs. Forcing her to wrap around his torso. “This isn’t what I said, Jacob.”

“Shut up, John. This is the only way we’re gonna be able to fuck her at once. And I doubt you’re big enough for her to lie down on top of you.” Jacob chuckled at John’s silence. “And you’re okay right here, aren’t you, honey?”

Rook nods once. Her cheeks flush, suddenly bashful at John seeing her in so obscenely. It was the way he stared at her. Like she truly was some kind of god. 

Her own thoughts distracted her from when John pushed in. He enters her easily thanks to Joseph’s prior preparation but she still feels snug and unsullied. When he stills, their hips flush against one another, Rook wiggles her hips experimentally. Feeling self conscious as Jacob grabs her ass and spreads her. 

Jacob’s fingers circle around where John stretched her. Teasing theidea of pushing in. 

“Please,” Rook whines in spite of herself. Head tossed back to knock into Jacob’s jaw. 

John shakes his head. Meeting Jacob’s eyes for confirmation. “Not yet.” He cups her breasts, rolling her nipples around with a hefty moan. “Beautiful.”

She tingles at the compliment; unused to hearing it when it comes to her body. She was showered with praise because of her marksmanship and tenacity. But never before on her looks. To show her thanks she clenches her pussy around John’s cock, making him choke. Her action has his hips bucking fervently. She leans back into Jacob, squirming when he really does sink a finger inside her stretched cunt. She gyrates her pelvis, dragging broken moans from John. 

“Stretch her out, John. I gotta get in there somehow.” 

_ Wait. What?  _

John caught the sour look on her face, the storm raging behind her eyes and smiled. “We won’t hurt you, my dear. You don’t need to be so worried.”

“You’re going to...to fuck me at the same time. It’s a good reason to be worried.” Rook flinches, not at all used to the way Jacob’s large fingers make her cunt widen even more.

John hesitates. Breath coming out frantically. Pausing when Jacob forces in another finger against John’s dick. 

John’s hips stutter, their bodies knocking together clumsily. It pulls a whimper from her throat, guttural and pained, immediately soothed by Jacob’s lips on her shoulder. 

“Be gentle with her, brothers. She’s to be cherished.” Joseph reminds. Such an anchor to what she was experiencing that it takes her a second to realize he was real. That she was okay, he wouldn’t let his brothers tear her into two. 

Rook’s thighs flex, trying to scramble away from this plan that was bound to go horribly wrong when Jacob spreads his fingers apart inside her. 

She lifts his head from Jacob’s chest, forces herself to meet Joseph’s steady gaze. He looked calmer than ever. She tried to embody his feelings. To calm herself down. But that all slipped away when another finger slides in, too fast, too much at once.

“I can’t--guys!” 

“You can.” John sounds far away, like he’s high, hips rolling forwards in tiny motions. Unable to fuck her rough with Jacob’s fingers in the way. “You are made for this, made for us. You are the beginning, Rook.”

“I won’t be able to…”

“Don’t be afraid.” John is smiling at her, his pace increasing as much as it can. 

“I’m going to fucking stab you all after this is done. I’m not dealing with this for seven years.”

Jacob laughs behind her. A full, hearty laugh that vibrates through her body. John seems just as amused, a gust of air ghosting over her hot flesh. Their words move things along, has Jacob lining himself up.

It’s like a domino effect. John starts moving for real now, way less cautious, fucking just as rough as she always imagined he would. 

Rook realizes that he’s not enough. Not after she had John’s cock and Jacob’s fingers at once. But the thought of taking more, taking what they promised, is terrifying. 

“It’s not going to work.” Rook shoves at John’s shoulders, eyes wide with fear. She sucks in a breath when there’s the sudden press of something way thicker than a couple of fingers. “You both won’t fit.”

Joseph sighs. Like she’s a child refusing to go to bed at the proper time. “Rook this is God’s plan. Take it and say thank you.”

“No. No, no fuck that shit.” Rook gets the sudden urge to hit them. To clock John, send him reeling and sink her teeth into Jacob’s flesh. She kept still, trying for words once again. “You’re going to rip me in two.”

“Well what did you expect from us?” John snarls the words. He has her shaking from fear. 

Rook wants to respond, to make some snarky comment, the kind that she was known for. That had the Seeds hating her with every fiber of their being from the very beginning. But her mouth is suddenly dry. Refusing to cooperate in any sort of way. Yet they manage to pull a series of moans from her as Jacob jerks his hips up from beneath her to get deeper. 

Rook’s thoughts are a jumbled up mess by the time Jacob’s fit inside with John, not inside fully, no, she really doubts that would be possible. Not now when she hadn’t had sex in literals months. Her body outright refuses to swallow down Jacob to the base of his cock. It hurts as it is, and she couldn’t imagine her pussy clamping down against the larger stretch both of their cocks would bring. 

What makes it worse is how different they are. Without seeing their cocks inside of her she could feel the different sizes and girths that stretch her. Jacob, thank God, stays still. Allowing her to adjust. Like that’s even a thing that could ever happen. John can’t seem to contain himself. He isn’t full on fucking her. He keeps it to tiny rolls of his hips that leave her breathless. 

“You’re going to kill me.” Rook swallows, tears in her eyes. “It hurts.” 

“They aren’t going to harm you, Rook.” Joseph supplies from his position on the chair he pulled up. As if she wasn’t already in pain. Rook doesn’t know what to say, she isn’t sure how disagreeing would go for her. But those thoughts are gone when John moves roughly and hits a spot deep within her. “John!”

“Yes,” John laughs through his words, eyes full of mania. “Doesn’t that feel wonderful, Rook?”

He doesn’t stop moving, keeps thrusting his hips like a piston. Destroying her insides and stealing her breath away. Jacob has more self control than his baby brother. He doesn’t move nearly as fast. Limiting it to small rolls of his hips. He was already close from when his dick was jammed down her throat, he didn’t need it as much as John did. And deep down she knows that it wouldn’t wouldn’t be enough if it were just Jacob, but John makes up for it with uncontrolled thrusts of his hips that drills her core. 

Without warning a familiar tightness begins to coil in the pit of her stomach. She finally finds her voice and whimpers. “Fuck. Faster.”

John immediately grabs hold of her hips, encouraging her to sway while at the same time slipping past Jacob. The worst part was the banging of the headboard combined with skin slapping skin. Noise she was so accustomed to suddenly making her second orgasm approach quicker. 

Rook’s movements become more erratic, more vigorous as the pain of their combined cocks wash away into something delicious. The slapping of skin against skin grows louder as Jacob picks up the speed. 

Jacob, with one arm wrapped around her waist, reached to grab her chest. He groped her breasts, moaning low in his throat at the way her tits jiggled with each thrust they provided. 

“Ah, yes. Yes, work our cocks, darling,” John murmurs breathlessly. Eyes clenched shut at the onslaught of pleasure. 

Rook’s panting, unable to come up with any sort of dirty talk. Because something inside her sparks heat and she loses her mind. “Oh God, oh yes.”

She desperately grinds on them, rutting back against Jacob and into John. Hoping for some sort of friction against her engorged clit. She gets that when John thrusts forward, his soft bush of hair providing enough padding between her folds to make her pussy twitch around them and she knows what’s coming before she can warn either of them. 

With a quivering cry Rook cums for the second time that night, around two cocks jammed deep inside her. Her orgasm washes over her in waves, making her legs twitch as they both worked her through her climax. 

The brothers must’ve finished too. Just as quiet as Joseph. Save for a few held back moans. Jacob’s hold around her waist loosens just as John pulls out. Their combined load sliding out onto the sheets. 

She flops bonelessly next to Jacob, letting him ease her down onto the mattress. She shuts her eyes instantly, ready to sleep after the fucking they gave her. Distantly she hears movement all around her, voices mixed in with the spread apart tremors still coming from above. Rook shakes out of fear, she cant help it. That might’ve distracted her for a while, but now she remembers why they did that.

God’s glorious plan. 

Rook’s heart sinks at the thought. Just around the same time Joseph manages to flick on a radio and the droning announcements made by whoever's in charge fills the bunker. All she can hear is Joseph speaking over it, telling them about God’s glorious fucking plan. 


	37. Befriending Them [pt 2]

The mattress was soft at least, she practically sunk into it. Even if it had stains she couldn’t identify and rested on a cold floor devoid of springs or a bed frame. If she wasn’t so scared, body alight with pain from things she couldn’t quite recall, she just might take the time to appreciate how  _ warm _ her surroundings were.

Not pretty, hardly so. It was too scary to be beautiful. The room she was in could only be described as a cell, with a barred door that reminded her of a prison. But it was obvious someone had gone the extra mile to lighten the mood. To the ornate desk off to her left and the lamps that were too expensive for where she was. 

Rook didn’t remember much, she must have passed out sometime last night. From stress or heat she wasn’t sure, but she hadn’t been kidnapped; she wasn’t in danger. That made her breathe a little easier. She was fine, because she remembers the Seeds. Showing off all their caring and kind pleasantries that usually made her heart flutter. A reminder that she finally had friends.

What caught her attention though was the intricately carved wardrobe across the room, left ajar, like someone had been down here. The suits and vests in the closet were distinctly John’s. She’d recognise his taste anywhere. The little bubble of panic let up just a tad, even if she couldn’t figure out why his things were kept down in such a dingy place like he’d been living here. The pain radiating from her neck made her whine. Coming from a new set of ink that she hadn’t asked for. 

She was shaking, blurry memories coming back to her in confusing pieces. Angrily, she tossed off the blankets (so damn soft) covering her in one quick movement. 

It was only then that she realized the cuffs around her ankles. Large, thick, black bands that attached to the wall. This was a mistake, a misunderstanding at best. She was fine, she was in good hands. Right?

“Good, you’re up.” Rook jolted, easing herself as far back as she could go. Until her spine hit the cement wall with a dull thunk. She folded her hands in her lap and twisted her lips, not trusting her voice when she was still a ball of nerves.

“I was beginning to worry, thinking something was wrong, that the dosage was too high.” Joseph smiled at her, tipping his head skyward in an action that she’s seen before. When she was a willing friend come to support his sermons, when the light from the sun peeking through the tiny window behind him shined down on him beautifully. “Looks like God has plans for you yet.”

“Joseph?”

“Hm?” He wasn't paying much attention to her, he was more focused on crossing the room and tugging at the chains on her ankles. Kneeling down and yet avoiding her eyes.

She swallowed her fear, knowing fully, deep down, that she had been wrong. She had given them the benefit of the doubt when they were the worst kinds of people. “What’s going on? Why am I here?” Tears pricked at her eyes, falling a second later when he remained quiet. They had pinned her down and tattooed her, tried to keep her calm with drugs. She couldn’t be naive now, it wasn’t stress or the Montana heat, it was them.

He ignored her questions and her tears. “How much do you remember?”

“A lot,” she lied, just to hide her fear. Then, because she knew Joseph and how sweet he was, that he wouldn't snap at her she said “you can’t keep me here.”

He did the strangest thing then. The most un-Joseph like thing. He laughed, his lips quirking and shoulders shaking. Pure mirth dancing behind yellowed glasses. He leaned in close, a finger beneath her chin. “Says who?”

His voice was a whisper, a menacing tone that set her on edge. This wasn’t the Joseph she was familiar with. This was the Father. The man who she had been warned about. Rook shuddered. She didn’t want to meet the Baptist. She didn’t want to meet the Soldier. Not when the rumors about them had made her sick. Imagining them actually doing some of the things they were accused of.

Kidnapping.

Murder.

Torture.

Brainwashing.

Rook whined. Pulling away from Joseph the best she could. Batting at his hands when they went to grab her again. He didn’t stop coming, he moved until she couldn’t deflect and grabbed her. One hand on her shoulder the other tight around her neck. 

“I’ll scream.” She warned, wondering if that would even work. If she was anywhere near safety. Would anyone hear her? And if they did, would they dare put their necks on the line to cross the Seeds?

“Go right ahead, Rook. But I wouldn’t recommend it.” His smile faltered, though she knew it was an act, a ploy to make her think he was still a good man. “I’m much more gracious than my brothers. And Jacob is known to be very good at making people obey him. If he wants you quiet—he’ll make you quiet.”

The threat was so much more real than her own, whether or not it was true was besides the point. It did the trick and had her clamming up without a second thought. 

“Much better,” he praised, hand easing off her throat to pat at her cheek kindly. 

“Now, how about we see to getting you a bath.” 

She took in as much as she could of her surroundings. She drank it in. Relief flooding her when she recognized where she was in an instant. 

Seed ranch. 

If Joseph wasn’t behind her, a hand on the small of her back to guide her, she’d run. Then she realized that it wouldn’t be that improbable if his brothers were here as well. Watching and waiting to see if she’d make a break for it. Which would be stupid. John’s driveway was a mile long. Barren, too. The tree line was a distant mirage, she’d be gunned down before she made it anywhere close.

Because she knew they had guns. Jacob always had one on him, which never made her weary before. He was supposed to be her friend. Someone who’d use that gun to protect her. Now though...she wasn’t so sure. 

John’s bathroom was just as extravagant as the rest of his home. With shining porcelain and dark, marbled tiles. His shower was big enough to fit three people with room to spare. The thought made her shudder when she peered over her shoulder and saw Joseph lingering.

He sighed, reading her mind. “Am I going to be able to trust you in here alone?”

Rook nodded her head instinctively. Not missing a beat. But what was she supposed to say? That as soon as she saw that large window above the toilet she thought of how big the drop would be. Wondering if she’d sprain anything that would hinder her chances of getting away. 

She tried to keep her face blank. To have her expression just as scared as it was down in her cell. But Joseph had been doing this a lot longer than her, which again makes her heart pound faster, and he just sighs again. Seeing right through her. 

“I’m leaving the door open a tad.” He paused, considering something before murmuring, “take your time.” 

Rook did at least turn on the shower and tease the idea of getting in. She didn’t know what they wanted or if they were angry. A lot of things were questions right now. What she knew for sure though was that there’d be an 100% chance of them getting pissed if she ran. 

She’d take her chances here. The thought of them hurting her...yeah, she’d take a shower. At least Joseph was being civil now. Letting her wash. Giving her the best blankets and allowing her a mattress instead of the floor. 

Getting undressed meant facing what had happened. Taking that shower forced her to sort through her thoughts. She kept coming back to the same ending. The horrible realization that they had fooled her. That each of the brothers loomed over her with a tattoo gun in their hands and put their imprint on her. 

The only caveat was that if they went through the trouble of marking her then she must be important to them for some reason. They wouldn’t hurt her. 

How many times had John threatened those who had poisoned her mind against them? The image of him pacing back and forth in the station, ranting with a soft voice and hands clenched, came to mind. She remembers thinking how awful it would be to be on John’s good side. 

“Rook! You almost done?”

So much for taking her time. 

Then again she wasn’t sure how long she’d been under the spray of water. Her mind was still hazy and her vision blurred occasionally. 

With a lack of coordination she clambered over the lip of the tub and onto the cold tile. It hit her how cold she was, that she was naked. And her clothes--dirty beyond belief--were gone. In there wake was a fresh pair of what looked like pajamas. She swallowed uneasily as she got dressed. Shaking from a combination of the cold and fear.

Her eyes flitted around the bathroom, scared all over again. Being inside her head as long as she was, didn’t help anything. She just stressed herself out more. Now she was itching to run. To get the hell out of dodge. And really, as bad as she would feel, she thought she’d be able to take on Joseph. He didn’t exactly look strong. He was taller than her by far, but he was thin and lanky. She could take him.

Rook just needed a weapon. Which was scarce in a bathroom. She spun in a small circle, ever aware of the fact that Joseph could walk in at any time to pull her back down into that horrible room she first woke up in. 

She came up empty. There was nothing. But for chrissakes she was a trained deputy. If she couldn't knock a man to the floor, to at least daze him, then she was in the wrong line of work.

With a shuddering breath she ran to the door. Didn't want to give him time to react, to counter what she was planning to do. And it wasn't a very good plan at that. All she could think of was putting enough force into her gait that he falls down and she can breeze by him. 

She swung open the door and leapt out, a strangled cry on her lips. Her hands reached out, where she generally thought his neck would be. What she didn't expect was to hit a solid wall of muscle. 

Jacob.

He was quicker and bigger and so much stronger than her. He had sparred with her once. Offered to teach her to protect herself. Told her that if she hit an opponent in the right place than she could take down someone no matter their size.

But that was training. This, this was serious. He had been in more fights than she could imagine. Their scuffle (If she could call it that) didn't even last a minute. He put her on the ground and slapped a pair of handcuffs around her wrists with ease. As if he had been waiting for her.

“I guess you were right, Jacob.”

Above her, Jacob huffed, “yeah well no shit. You can’t expect her to fall in line. S’not that easy.”

“No…” Joseph trailed off, sounding uncertain, “I suppose not. I was just hoping.”

Jacob manhandled her back downstairs, a hand on the back of her neck as she struggled. Her pleading tone fell on deaf ears. He was a different person than she remembers. When he tossed her down on her matress, not bothering to unlock her arms from behind her, there was nothing but a cold glare in his eyes that had her realizing for the first time how deep she was.

If she didn't know any better she might think they weren’t even concerned about someone coming to find her. Those rumors… _ ’I’m sure they faked his death, Rook. Fuck, at least as them about it. Just to see if they squirm. Their family’s worried. And...and it's all a bit suspicious, don't you think?’ _

Rook buried her head in her blankets and cried. She was dead to the world. No one was coming for her. It was just her and them.


	38. Soulmates

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook has the name of the three Seed brothers written in her body and they take her after the helicopter crash

Joseph's breath caught in his throat. For the time being everything slowed. Every intake of air. Every pop of gunfire in the distance. Even this stranger of a deputy hanging upside down in front of him seemed unsure. 

It had been an innocent gesture. Reaching out to grab ahold of her wrist. Fuck him, but he didn’t  _ know _ . He would’ve told his flock to be more careful, to not risk their lives for his if it meant there was even the smallest chance that she could’ve gotten hurt. 

Right now he couldn’t stomach the thought. 

His eyes darted once more to the ink on her forearm. His throat clicked when he swallowed, too dry. It was small and scrawling along her skin. Darker than he was used to coming from a tattoo. That’s when it clicked. It wasn’t a tattoo at all. 

_ Christ.  _

The realization made him stop in the middle of his sentence. He stammered, tripping on his next few words when he got a good look at the names etched forever on her body. Unsure if she even  _ knew.  _ But dear god how could she not? She had accepted this job after all, she heard the marshall call out his name, telling her to seal his fate with a pair of handcuffs. She had to know who they were to one another.

Which is why her fear made him all the more angrier. 

How dare this stranger come into his home with the intent of tearing his family apart. After all they had to endure...he began to wonder when God would give him a break. She didn’t have the right. This was her blood as much as it was his.

A soulmate in all this hell, just as the collapse is drawing near, made him tremble where he leaned back on his heels. Joseph shouldn't be falling apart at the prospect of a soulmate, their other half finally here, staring him down and so real by his side. He’s been through worse than this mess. God has tested him ever since he was a young boy, helpless but to watch his brother bear his skin to save Joseph from the pain. Once upon a time he thought that if he could handle that than he could take on the world. But the thought of their soulmate being the harbinger of the end, the one who could destroy them with a flick of her wrist...This must be some cruel joke from the Devil himself.

He read over her tattoos again and again. Finally letting his words taper off into nothing. Content to watch her squirm. The blood was probably rushing to her head, maybe that could explain away the woozy, far away look in her eyes. And the heat from the flames building around them was what was making her dazed. Because she couldn’t be scared of him.

They were soulmates. 

Joseph breathed in deep and without a second thought pressed down on her seatbelt. Releasing her into his lap. She was all turned around, limbs struggling to move herself upright and bolt towards the woods. He wouldn’t allow it—didn’t—he locked his arms around her before she had a chance to make the world come into focus. Not like it’d do her any good. She wasn’t going anywhere. 

“Let go of me you psycho fuck!”

Joseph squeezed her tight. Arms righting her in his lap and wrapping a hand around her throat. The force had her banging her head into the edge of the helicopter. The sound of metal slamming against her skin made him wince. He still put steel in his tone when he spoke. “Knock it off.” His voice alone stopped her in her tracks. She stilled, a tiny whimper eeking out from her lips. 

“Good,” he murmured, and he couldn’t help himself when he went to stroke her cheek. Just to know how soft she was. Eager to find out about his soulmate, to know all her flaws and shortcomings, all her achievements and dreams. He wanted to find each freckle that dotted her skin. 

“You know who I am, don’t you, deputy?” 

“Mhm.” A short pause. He felt her shift, eyes probably settling on the fire slowly engulfing the downed helicopter. Or maybe she was trying to see if her friends were merely unconscious or dead. “Joseph Seed. Leader of Projects at Eden's Gate. R-ruling with your brothers and sister. You managed to get the radio stations and you’ve even got the cops on your side.” She breathed in deep, shuddering in his grasp. Twisting her neck around to glance up at him. “You’ve made a name for yourself.”

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think that was a compliment.” He laughed humorlessly, holding her a smidge closer and placing a kiss on the shell of her ear. “But don’t worry. We have all the time in the world to be kind to each other.” 

Taking her from the helicopter was a feat in itself. He almost had the nerve to ask his people for help. He knew they would, that they lingered nearby ready to act under his command. They already had her friends in their hands, took them when he said so. They were probably wondering what made this one special. Why was the Father so insistent that he be the one to guide her? 

He’d answer all their curious gazes later. He promised himself that as he pulled her away kicking and yelling. Soon she’d get a proper introduction to his flock. But for now she needed time. He wasn’t naive, he could see in her eyes what a fighter she was. It only happened to be luck that the crash made her delirious, too weak to properly strike him. 

She wasn’t putting her feet under her properly. Dragging the whole way to the church. If anything her squirming amped up the closer they got to those enclosed walls. He could feel her little hummingbird heart pitter patter against her ribs. 

Everyone’s eyes were on her, Joseph’s people, the ones who threw rocks at them as they had made their way back to the helicopter, those that jumped into the blades to save their Father, now hurled obscenities at her. She’s never been more afraid than now. Muscles tense and ready for them to launch themselves at her. To tackle her to the ground and stomp her head in. But that didn’t happen. Joseph stayed close to her. Never allowing his followers close enough to get in a swing.

Benefits of being soulmates. 

Which was a feeling she was still struggling to get used to. Probably why she was too lost in her thoughts to realize that suddenly Joseph was guiding her down the aisle of his church, she was boxed in between pews and all alone save for his siblings. She fleetingly wondered if they'd been here the whole time, just as believing as Joseph that God would keep him safe and bring him back to them.

Joseph stopped at the bottom of the stage. A hand resting on her shoulder with bright eyes flicking around nervously. “Well?”

“Yeah, she’s something.” That’d be Jacob, if her memory served her correctly. Chiseled and large, imposing with those same eyes they all shared. Staring her down like she was in the wrong, which yeah, she deserved that. It was the sort of stare you’d give someone who wasn’t welcome. It was a look he mastered because she couldn’t hold his gaze for long.

Instead she shifted to the man to his left, the one just a tad bit closer to them, a bit more on edge too if his jittery movements said anything. His clothes were rumpled, hair a mess too, as if he spent hours raking his hands through it.

He caught her staring and cleared his throat. “What now, Joseph?” 

“You know what, brother. You both do. We’ve spoken extensively about this moment, waiting for it to come to pass.”

Rook found herself nodding along to his words. Unable to stop herself from leaning back into her soulmate, to accept him fully as he already had accepted her. But when they descended upon her like a pack of wolves and began to strip her...oh how she fought. She used her words and sharp nails to strike out against them. Even if it hurt. Since the helicopter touched down she began to ache, surrounded by three souls that connected to hers, resisting just might pull her apart at the seams, but she couldn’t lie there and take it. Despite being soulmates.

It was too goddamn soon. Her nerves were raw, she was still shaking from fear. They didn’t care, more focused on getting her naked then her tears. She managed to catch Jacob on his jaw, a small win when a second later he threw her to the ground and kept her there with a boot on her neck.

“Easy, Jacob, be gentle with her. She deserves the best.”

“Does she?” He snapped back, head tilting down to snarl at her. “She rocks up here on her high horse like she somebody and we’re gonna treat her right? I don’t think so.” The pressure on her throat increased until her vision blurred and she blacked out.

She couldn’t have been out for long, because it was still dark outside. The moon high in the sky. But she wasn’t inside anymore, not trapped in the confines of a church like she remembered, and for a second she thought that botched arrest was a nightmare. Because the cold air on her skin, the water lapping at her waist, couldn’t be real. 

Her hands reached out to feel around her, too out of it to open her eyes. She felt skin, slightly cooled from the water. She felt  _ raised _ skin, under her touch, lower there was a cloud of curly hair. Soft against the pads of her fingers. It was pure instinct that she delved further and tangled her first within it.

“Yes, my dear, take me. That’s it.” 

She flinched at the sound of his voice. Remembering all at once that she shouldn't be at ease. Rook tried to jerk away, only to find that someone was at her back, holding her tight but allowing her hands to wander.

“This is a bad idea, John.”

“It’s fitting.”

When she didn’t feel like she was going to throw up anymore she opened her eyes. She found baby blues first, peering at her curiously.  _ John _ , with hair still tousled, if only just wet at the edges. Because he brought them to a lake, they were standing in a goddamn lake. At four in the morning. After he kidnapped her friends and tried to force her naked. Accept now she really was naked. Bare as the day she was born, like a newborn getting christened. Her nippled were a dusty pink, tiny peaks on her chest at the chill. And John...christ her hand was buried in his thick thatch of pubic hair, below the happy trail on his stomach and too damn close to his dick.

She yanked away immediately, letting her hand drop back into the water to make tiny waves that lapped at her stomach. Which was around the time she noticed that he was just as naked as she was--so was the man to her back--Jacob. She didn’t need to look to know, she could feel him. How huge he was, towering over her brilliantly.

Her head turned, searching, because something was missing. Something deep inside her was aching.

“Don’t worry,” John murmured, cupping her cheek, “he’s gone to get something to calm you down. To make this transition as easy as possible for all of us. For now, just relax.”

Easier said than done. Right now her body was overly sensitive. A trail of fire left behind by their lingering touches. Roaming everywhere. A hand on her hip, one curling around her breast, a finger sliding between her folds but not yet pushing in. 

Joseph found them like that, his brothers exploring her body while she squirmed and pleaded with them to stop. He frowned at the look of terror on her face. It just didn’t fit. 

His hands cradled the vial of bliss carefully as he waded into the water. Not bothering to undress, this needed to be done now. 

“Rook,” he greeted softly, recalling the tiny, nameplate on her breast. Capturing her attention, and for a blessed moment she wasn’t trying to escape. Just looking at him as his brothers touched her. But then the picture broke and she was screaming. 

Joseph sighed. Reaching out a hand to hold onto her shoulder to steady himself. With a deep breath he popped the cork and nodded grimly at Jacob. 

Jacob’s thick arm moved from holding her across her stomach to wrapping snuggling around her neck. Applying pressure until she was forced to tip her head back. Giving Joseph the chance to spill its content over her face. 

The effect was immediate. 

Wide, blown out pupils and heavy limbs that made her pliable. 

“Put her on the shore,” Joseph commanded. “Jacob will take her there.”

John’s mouth formed into a thin line even as he did what was asked. This was an old argument. Why did Jacob get to go first? Who says they can’t take her at once? Now wasn’t the time. Not in this holy place, in the same spot where peggies and sinners were born anew. So John kept his lips locked and squeezed Jacob’s shoulder tightly as he gave the man room to work. 

Jacob ran an appraising gaze over her body. She was pretty, there was no denying that. With long eyelashes that brushed the apples of her cheeks and freckles that dotted her skin all over. Her hips were wide, thighs thick. Her breasts were round and full, large nippled standing to attention. Not to mention her pretty pussy nestled between her legs covered with neatly trimmed hair. 

Jacob wouldn’t mind fucking this one. But he was never one for unconscious girls. He preferred a little fight back, someone to wrap their legs around his waist and leave deep gouges in his back with their nails. 

This would do though. He glanced up at where Joseph stood by the tree line. This wasn’t love making, not even a quick lay, it was something to appease his brother. And he’d be lying if he didn’t say his mind wasn’t calming down at the thought of being one with his soulmate. 

Jacob took hold of her thighs and spread her legs, shuffling between them. Eyes falling to her open twat. How she was clenching around nothing. Like she  _ knew.  _ The thought excited him, and he couldn’t help it when his cock nudged against her entrance and he pushed right in. Supported by the slick gathered there from how John wouldn’t stop tweaking her nipples. 

He bottomed out with a groan, head tipped back as his fingers tightened on her hips. Their pelvic bones knocked together, and just like that they were connected. 

Jacob took a moment to watch how her tight pussy was forced to stretch around him, wider than it had any right to be. She hadn’t played around that much it seemed. 

He pulled out slowly, taking in how his dick looked sliding out then slamming back inside. Jostling her body. From there he set an easy rhythm. Going fast and hard, forming bruises on her body wherever he could reach. 

He shook when her walls squeezed around him, almost ending it there. He pulled out quick, stroking his cock and teasing his head. 

He heard Joseph sigh, mumbling, “you’re meant to have sex with her, Jacob.”

He didn’t dive back in right away, instead he ran his cock head around her entrance. Focusing momentarily on her little nub. Smiling something predatory when she squirmed. That’s the best thing about the bliss he supposed. She wasn’t completely gone. She could feel, that’s for damn sure. 

He wondered if he could make her cum. 

He slammed back inside her heat. Bent over her body with hands tangled in her hair. Making her bear down on his length. 

“There you go, honey. Take it. Fucking take my dick.” His words came to a shuddering halt as he finished. His load shooting inside her, milking him dry when her pussy clenched. 

The moment he was off and up, standing on shaky feet, Joseph was taking his place. Pushing back an over eager John. 

Joseph was reverent about the whole ordeal. How could he not be? This was his soulmate. For years his father convinced him that this wasn’t in his future. That no one was out there to love him. 

This act of love was meant to pour out all his frustrations. 

And that’s exactly what he did. He kissed and sucked at her skin. Forming hickeys on her inner thighs and on her neck. 

His fingers found her cunt easily. He combed through the hair there, leaning down to nuzzle into it. Inhaling to embed her scent into his memory, hoping to never lose this. 

Rook kicked out suddenly, arms moving to push at his shoulders weakly. When he glanced up, he noticed the hazy tint to her eyes. Still gone then, they had time. Not much though, the dosage couldn’t be too high, that would risk turning her into something akin to a zombie.

With that in mind Joseph pulled down his zip, just enough for his cock to pool out. He took a steadying breath, mumbling a prayer for only him and her as he pushed inside. Jacob’s cum made her slick, she was looser too, from how his brother fucked her so well. It made Joseph’s entry all the more easier. And for that he couldn't complain. He was only human. And this...he was eager to say the least.

“Look, my child, look at how we fit,” He murmured softly, fingertip coming to tease around her open cunt, where she was sheathed on his cock. He tried to go slow, to savor this moment and show God their worship, but it had been so damn long. Long enough for Joseph to actually forget what a woman felt like. It was just as amazing as he dreamt it would be, on those nights when he allowed himself to succumb to those kind of impure thoughts.

He took delight in knowing this wasn’t wrong. That she was meant for this purpose soley. Joseph reveled in the sounds they made. The way their skin slapped against each other as he sped up mixed with the moans he let himself indulge in.

His release crept up on him, unused to the stirring in his gut. He would've been embarrassed by how soon it was all over, but he was lost within the joy of watching his soulmate leak with his cum.

Joseph pulled away from her, laying a kiss on her cheek in a temporary farewell. A smile softly appearing on his face when he stepped back to watch John rush towards her.

John was mumbling gently to her, words that tripped over themselves by how fast he was talking. He sat back on his heels, eyes trailing over the bruises that littered her skin and the wetness sloshing out of her. It was hotter than he thought such a scene could be. 

His hand reached out to touch her skin, squeezing her thighs before moving up, past her cunt, where he curled a tattooed fist around her breast. He huffed when she twisted her head around. Coming out of it, which excited him, egged him on actually.

John positioned himself between her thighs, grabbing ahold of one of her legs to heave over his shoulder. He got a much better view that way. And, he’d hit her deeper. Maybe even steal some sounds from her.

When he sunk into her he let out a snarl. Not bothering to contain himself, not when this felt fucking amazing. His eyes closed on their own accord, getting lost in the feeling of her squeezing around his dick. Making him edge closer with each thrust. Which just wouldn't do, he was hardly done with her.

He threw a quick glance over his shoulder, towards the tiny lake where he was able to hold her for the first time. Like he said before, it would only be fitting. People were born anew here everyday, she had to be one of them. 

The thought made his heart quicken and his balls tighten. He pulled out before he could release, realizing how he could make this so much better. Without a word of explanation to his brothers he picked her up effortlessly, cradling her in his arms as he waded into the water. The coldness stole his breath away, had him standing still in the center to collect himself as the water lapped at his hips.

“Here we are, my dear. This is what was meant to become of you. You just didn't know it yet, hm?” 

It took some maneuvering, but eventually John was able to get her limp arms looped loosely around his neck. He even had somewhat of a solid hold on her to keep her from falling. He plunged inside her when he was sure she wouldn't wake and ruin the moment. To his pleasure she made a tiny noise that would’ve been lost to the wind if her head wasn’t resting on his sternum the way it was.

He fucked her like that. With her suspended and in his arms, forced to be bounced up and down on his cock. The feeling of her warmth in juxtaposition with the cool water had him cumming quicker than he meant to. All her juices immediately fell down her leg and mixed in with his skin. He didn't mind at all, it was more intimate that way. He could hope he would be able to experience this again, only with her wide awake and begging for more. For him to go faster.

Jacob grabbed Rook from John, helping them out of the water when he looked so winded. Like the slightest breeze would blow him over. They were all satiated though, ready to curl up in bed with Rook and just sleep. To calm down and learn about her. She wouldn't deny them, no, she couldn’t. Not if they had anything to do about it. 


	39. Lost Sister

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mad Old Seed had a kid with another woman, adding a sister to the family, and that kid is Rook

“You look lost.” 

“Leave me alone.” Rook bites out, waving a hand dismissively, which really only serves to send up a cloud of bliss that’s quick to dissipate in the air. As if this whole field wasn’t already polluted with the stuff. “Go away. I’m not in the mood, Faith.” 

“I see you’re searching for _something_. I just can’t figure it out.” Faith spins in a circle, dainty white dress billowing out. It’s a mesmerizing sight. Caught Rook where she stands before she distantly remembers that she shouldn’t be here with a temptress like Faith. “Why don’t I help you?” 

Rook snorts. Right. When was the last time Faith had helped someone and it didn’t end in tragedy? 

“I don’t need your help.” Mostly because Rook doesn’t know what Faith’s talking about. What she’s supposedly searching for. Hadn’t really known since she wandered too close to those damn flowers because she had underestimated their danger. It’s something important. Something that Joseph would probably disapprove of. Most things she does nowadays seem to do that. 

Rook swallows past a flow of nausea that threatens to stop her. “Don’t need your help. I’m doing fine on my own.” 

Faith dances ahead. Hands brushing aside tall grass. Shoving more bliss Rook’s way in the process. She stops when Rook catches up to her, which takes forever. The bliss is thick, creates a sort of dreamy haze. Has her perception of the world all slowed down. Akin to a nightmare, where you’re running away from the bad guy and it seems you can’t go fast enough, that you’re stuck in slow motion. She gets there eventually, where Faith waits patiently just to stare deeply at Rook, bottom lip jutting out when Rook shoves her to the side unceremoniously.

“Where are your friends?” Faith questions gently, like Rook’s a fragile thing that might break. Faith certainly touches her like she is. Tiny hands on her shoulders to stop her for good this time.

And Rook does stop. Because her legs feel like jelly and she is seconds away from collapsing. 

“Busy.” Rook says shortly. Which is probably true, they would have gone on this suicide mission themselves if they weren’t busy. Rook doesn’t move away. Instead she stares back into Faith’s eyes. A challenge. 

“Are they now. They are always up to something, aren’t they? I never see them out here with you, fighting by your side like a friend should. Are you sure you don’t long for something more than what they give you? Brothers and sisters to call your own, perhaps?” Faith’s lips screw up into a forced smile. Waiting for a reaction. 

Rook damn well gives her one. Throws her weight into the punch. Faith disappears in a puff of smoke. There one instant gone the next. It has Rook falling on her knees, tears blurring her vision at the old wounds Faith opened. The ones she tried buried so deep that she thought it possible to forget about them. 

The whistling of the wind sounds too damn close to the whispers that followed her throughout her life. The exasperation in her parents’ voice whenever she brought up her past. 

_“Darling we're a family.”_

_“Your parents weren’t the best. Maybe when you’re older we’ll explain. But they weren’t good for you.”_

_“You’re better off here, with us. We’re your mom and dad, darling. We raised you, since day one, almost.”_

_“Yes, Rook. You had siblings. But they were years older than you. I’m not sure how you’d even find them.”_

Rook wasn't too sure what Faith had been going on about, but now it’s clear. Faith, maybe by pure chance, had seen right through her. She _had_ been searching for something. Every day of the damn week. Ever since her parents told her she was adopted, that they weren’t her blood. She’s been looking.

“Faith!” Rook stumbles to her feet, tears falling freely now. “Get back here!” She whirls in a crazy circle. Tripping and stumbling, looking for that vile woman. 

Then she’s there again, staring at Rook with too much pity. 

“You _are_ lost, aren’t you? What is it? Tell me what’s wrong.”

“Don’t ever say that shit to me again!” She advances on Faith real quick. Hallucination or not Faith can’t escape fast enough, not with how Rook moves. Standing in front of her in less than a second, a finger jabbing into her sternum. “I have a family. I have people who love me! I have all that I want!”

Rook closes her eyes. A sob ripping itself free. When she looks back up, Faith is gone again. 

*****

Rook doesn’t have time for this. She’s still woozy, mind clouded from the bliss. And she can’t do this right now. She’s too tired to run away from another capture party. To elude Eden’s Gate for what seems to be the hundredth time. 

She wants to curl up and cry in peace, Faith can’t even grant her that. She saw Rook at her weakest, struck a nerve with a goddamn machete, of course she’s taking her chance now. When Rook is so lost that can hardly point a gun to put up some sort of fight. 

Which, admittedly, doesn’t last long. 

The added dosage of bliss isn’t doing her any favors, it makes her sick. Has her throwing up down her front when her body sways, head bashing against the glass of a window. _She’s in a car._ Sitting up right only because a body is pressed against hers, an arm cradling her close, making a low noise of concern when her head thunks against the window again.

It _hurts_ when she wakes up. She’s got a headache that wraps around her skull and pounds at her, skewing her vision until her stomach heaves and she has a small sense left inside her head to leans over off the bed she’s in to throw up. 

When her eyesight turns right again, the world no longer spinning, she notices what’s wrong with this picture. That her hands, bloodied and bruised like they always are, clutch at silky sheets that are not her own. 

She’s buried beneath a mound of blankets—too soft, a sensory overload to her rough skin—that she immediately tosses off. Let’s them tumble off the bed because this sure as hell isn't her house. 

Rook cranes her head around real slow, scared that bile is going to rise in her throat again. It’s a barren excuse of a room. Wooden dresser across from her that has a single lamp on top that someone neglected to turn off. No pictures or personal affects on the walls that mark this as a proper home.

She pushes herself to her feet, wincing at the cold wood against overworked flesh. Which draws her attention to the fact that her shoes and socks have been stolen at some point. 

Weird. Strange that she isn’t deep in the bliss again or stuck in a cage, chained up somewhere. She’s still a threat though, apparently, because her bag is also gone, all her weapons sequestered away somewhere. 

She finds that she can stand perfectly fine. Her legs strong somehow, even after all that bliss. She has no problem tip-toeing to the door. Stopping to press her ear to it. Eyes closing to listen. 

Nothing. 

Not even a whisper of creaking wood. That scares her, because she still doesn’t know where she is and the lack of voices means she can’t tell if she’s among friends. 

She chances it and pushes the door open, stopping every few moments when it creaks. She doesn’t trust herself at all, not when her mind still feels frazzled. Like she’s going to pass out. But she needs to keep going, lying back down and waiting isn’t an option. Right now she has the element of surprise. She wants to keep it that way. 

Difficult when she hears voices floating up towards her. Coming from down the hall. Where a set of stairs wait for her, looking so damn enticing. An escape route if she’s even seen one. 

Until footsteps clang towards her. Moving up and up. Someone’s going to see her. They might even shoot her, shove her back into the bliss, make her lose her mind. 

The image of that has her curling her fists up. Ready to fight. To lunge at whoever comes up those stairs and send them back down. Maybe if she’s lucky they’ll break their neck. 

“Oh, you’re awake.” Jacob blinks at her. It’s all sorts of jarring. Because this place does _not_ belong to Jacob. It’s too well put together. Polished and clean out in this hallway. With large windows to her left and a beautiful rug beneath her bare feet. 

He catches the downward tilt of her brows and laughs somewhat friendly. Chest pushing out as he crosses his arms. 

“What’s going on?” 

“Tell you in a minute, honey. Come on.” He turns on his heel, not waiting to see if she follows. But when he doesn’t hear her obedient feet at his back he stops on the first step. “I know you’ve got questions. But nothing’s going to get done with you just standing there. Might as well come down.” 

Rook doesn’t want to. Every fiber in her body tells her that this is stupid. It screams danger. The fact that Jacob is almost placid says something is wrong. She follows though, she doesn’t have much of a choice. She can’t outrun Jacob. The man probably has a damn wolf somewhere in this house, waiting to be given the command to chase and maim. 

He leads her to a living room, much more decorated than the room she woke up in, with a blazing fire that feels beautiful in the cold of January. She pauses for a second when she sees John and Joseph, sitting on a plush couch and murmuring between themselves. 

They stop when they see Jacob, eyes falling to her quickly. Looking at her expectantly. For _what_ she doesn’t know. 

“Take a seat, deputy,” John drawls real slow. A twang in his voice when he says her title that sends chills up her spine. It keeps her rooted right where she is. Not getting any closer. 

She misses what Joseph says next, too focused on how out of place Jacob looks here. Sitting next to his brothers on an overpriced piece of furniture, head tipped back slightly, patient for once. Not yet demanding that she sit her ass down and stop playing games. 

“Rook. Please sit.” Joseph tries again. Leaning forward, eyes pleading. “We just want to clear some things up. Get some answers from you, then you can walk out,” he tips his head towards the front door, “and leave peacefully.” 

Rook is careful when she sits. Stiff and bunched up, feeling like this is some sort of intervention with how they’re sat across from her. She squirms when nothing is said at first. They glance around, mumbling under their breaths. Like this wasn’t planned out beforehand, which makes this all the more strange, because if the Seeds are anything: they’re methodical. 

Joseph sighs softly before starting, a hand coming up to adjust his glasses. “Faith told us what happened when she found you in the bliss.” He pauses, waits for confirmation or an explanation or she doesn't know what, but stops when she doesn’t give him anything. “She was worried about you. Said that she made you angry when she never meant to.” His voice hangs and he frowns, he doesn’t know what to say next. Because this is going off of assumptions now. He knows her family is a sore spot but he doesn’t know exactly _why._

He adjusts his glasses, unsure when he speaks. “You were adopted, Rook?”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake. How do you even know that?”

“We do our research, deputy,” John butts in, a small, proud smile lingering on his lips. “We don't know _everything_ about you. Nothing a quick Google search won’t find.”

Rook doesn't like this at all. She hates that they think they know her better than she does--which, okay, they just might. She glances around the room, catches Peggie patrols roaming outside past an open window. Joseph might’ve said she could walk out unharmed, but she doesn't have a damn reason to believe his brothers would abide by that same promise.

“Lots of kids are adopted, it’s not a big deal.”

John snarls, “Isn’t it? Lots of people come out of that world with a head full of trauma.”

There’s a flicker of annoyance that marrs Joseph’s face. “As was our case, deputy,” Joseph interrupts. Holding a hand up when John makes a sound low in his throat. “But that’s not the point of this, John.” Then, softer, directed towards her, “you’ve heard so much about our family, Rook, enough to know that we were adopted ourselves. Thrown into different homes and ripped apart.” He clears his throat, pain flashing across his face that’s so raw it makes her recoil. “We had a sister, too, Rook. No one outside of my brothers and I know this. She was a mystery to us for so many years...she still is, in a sense.”

Her mind rushes to Faith. Then she catches the way he looks at her she realizes that there’s something else going on. 

Joseph reaches out a hand, grabs hold of her knee and squeezes. Letting it rest there when she doesn’t recoil. “You don’t have to hide behind a guise of happiness, Rook. Let us in.” 

“I'm not hiding shit. ” She persists through gritted teeth, shaking off his hand. “I don’t know why I’m even here!” 

“Faith struck a chord, no?” Joseph murmurs, ignoring her outburst like nothing had happened at all. “I was hoping to bring you and here everything would unravel as it should. Like He said it should. I wanted you to admit what we’ve assumed.” 

Rook wants to scream. To tell them that they can’t just do this. It isn’t fair to sit her down to play these games.

“Look,” she begins shakily, “I’m sorry that whatever you endured when you all were younger was hard. That’s…” tragic comes to mind, but she bit it back. They don’t deserve her pity. “It’s a shame,” she finishes lamely.

Jacob grunted, displeased, “just show her the goddamn picture, Joseph. She doesn’t know. How could she?” 

Her brows crinkle, fear rising up until she feels like she’s going to throw up.

Something is going on. Something she isn’t privy to. They knew something she didn’t. 

Rook leans back against the couch, eyes narrowing to assess the situation. To look at John a little more closely. He’s eager when Joseph stands, pupils a touch too wide. 

Jacob’s saying something, but she isn’t listening. Too focused on Joseph, on the paper he’s handing off to her before he takes his seat. 

She examines it with a critical eye. Hands white knuckled around it. It’s a legal document, she realizes. It looks fairly old, not torn and damaged though. Not thrown in some box to be forgotten about. This was important to them, and she can tell instantly why. It’s a birth certificate. The one she’s been searching for since she was a child. 

She can’t deny how her heart leapt with joy when she sees her name written out with a sloppy hand. This is her past. All the answers she’s ever wanted.

Some small part of Rook didn’t want to believe what she read next. But it was there all right, not going away when she blinked. Her birth father’s name: his last name.

Seed.

  
“Our father walked into our home brandishing that when he got home from work.” Joseph says softly, avoiding her eyes. “That baby was—is—our sister. But she didn’t belong to our mom. The woman’s name written out there isn’t our mom, but she’s yours. She didn’t want to raise someone else’s child. Some...crack whore’s daughter, I believe is what she said. Our father didn’t like that. Said that he’s always wanted a girl, that she couldn’t even do that right. So he got the job done by himself, snuck off at night only to fool around and get a girl. He wanted a little lady. That didn’t stop him from hitting her.”

“Jacob tried to protect her. Screamed his head off and yelled at our mom to do something. He got whipped that night…” Joseph pauses, he swipes angrily at the tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. “She was a sweet girl. Even if we didn’t get the proper time to know her. She adored Jacob, sometimes I think she believed he was her dad.”

Rook’s nostrils flare as she holds back her own set of tears. “What does this have to do with me?” 

“C’mon, Rook. You’re a smart kid,” Jacob encourages, which throws her for a loop because Jacob Seed does _not_ encourage. He also does not look defeated, which makes this picture all the more strange. 

“They took her from us. Gave me and my brothers to another family, but they took her. Our little baby sister. We said goodbye...but it wasn’t enough.” 

Rook doesn’t want to listen to Joseph. She can’t. But he leans in closer to her, a hand cradling her arm. “Rook, it’s you. John told you, we’ve done our research. We’ve had our fair share of mistakes. We wanted to be sure. And now…” Joseph clasped her hand, held it tight until her bones creaked. “We looked _everywhere_ for you, I promise. And God finally gave you to us. You don’t have to be alone anymore. You’re home, sister. Thank you.” 


	40. Headcanon Seed's Premature Ejaculation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How each Seed boy react to premature ejaculation and leaving Rook unsatisfied.

**John**

  * I think it goes without saying that he’d be embarrassed. He prides himself on knowing how to make people’s bodies sing with pleasure. If he doesn’t have that then what chance does he have keeping Rook around? 
  * He gets all still and quiet, refusing to believe it at first until he begins to get soft inside her. 
  * He doesn’t want to talk about it. Shutting down Rook’s words of concern when he stands up. Waving her away. 
  * That’s when he gets angry. Not at her, he’s not that childish, he knows it’s not her fault. It’s him. He’s the problem. That thought makes his past creep up on him. All those doubts when he was a kid...that maybe he’s just not meant to find someone, it seems true now. 
  * For a while he’s convinced Rook will leave him. That when he wakes up in the morning, she won’t be there. 
  * John panics, he’s afraid to lie back down, to look her in the eye because he doesn’t know what he’ll see. 
  * He knows there’s a chance that she’ll run back to the resistance and tell everyone. Defame his character beyond repair until he becomes a laughing stock and not even his own flock can look him in the eyes. 
  * But she’s still there the next morning. Holding him tight and kissing his lips softly like she always does. She doesn’t dance around what happened the other day like he wished she would. And he almost tells her to fuck off right then. 
  * She doesn’t give him the chance to say anything though because suddenly she’s pinning him down and straddling his hips. She’s using him like he’s nothing but a toy. Bouncing up and down on his cock until they’ve both finished. And if she has to do this every hour for _months_ just to assure him that there’s nothing wrong with him, then so be it. 



**Jacob**

  * Jacob is a violent man by nature. He’s rough and fast and so unapologetic when he comes too soon. This is nothing more than stress release, as early as him and Rook are into this little ‘relationship.’ He treats her the same as the people he’d sleep with in his army days.
  * So he doesn’t _care._
  * He has more than enough ways to satisfy her. She can’t complain, he doesn’t give her time to. Because suddenly he’s kneeling between her thighs to finish her off. 
  * Rook doesn’t dare mention it. It might keep him up at night, though there’s nothing he can do about it. He’s expected this to happen sooner or later. He’s not young anymore. 
  * Jacob has a feeling she won’t come back. He’ll let her go back to playing hero, and they’ll fall into their roles like they had before. They’ll be enemies once again. 
  * Jacob knows that some women find him attractive, he ticks a certain box. But Rook is different than most. 
  * But he doesn’t lose her. She still looks at him with heat behind her eyes. Most of all, she keeps coming back.



**Joseph**

  * Joseph makes a punched out sort of groan when he finishes. He buries his face in the crook of Rook’s neck and mumbles something incoherent. Face flushed immediately. 
  * He can’t say this is some sort of punishment, that this is God’s will or a sign. Because he has waited _so long_ to have her. Surely God wouldn’t trick him. 
  * She’s the problem. God may have wanted him to start anew, to find a bride and have a child, but not with this one. Or at least, not with one who’s so impure. Someone riddled with sin.
  * That’s fine. He’ll pull away from her with a sad little smile and tell her that she needs to confess, that she has to let go of her hatred and accept him. 
  * It’s His will after all




	41. Addicted pt 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seeds realizing that Rook is self medicating on bliss.

Joseph isn’t angry per se, not like John remembers the last time Joseph was actually mad. The kind of pissed off that John so frequently gets that ends in irreparable destruction. He’s not pleased though, and that makes John worry. Because not only is Joseph pacing like a caged lion, but he’s pacing in John’s living room.

So this matter concerns John. 

Wonderful.

“If you’d just explain it to me—“

“I feel as if you should already know!” Joseph snaps back, fists curling at his sides. 

“Okay, well this isn’t fair now.” John tips his weight to one side, hands falling to his hips as he considers Joseph; and for the first time he notices how disheveled his brother looks. That water has darkened the cuffs of his jeans and the jagged line of scratches tucked under his chin. Almost hidden by his high collar if not for a few missing buttons. 

Joseph tracks John’s gaze and laughs bitterly. “Have you seen our deputy lately?”

A trick question probably, going off of how Joseph smiles at him. 

“No...she’s been strangely absent.”

“And did you ever stop to wonder why?” John wants to answer, to approach his brother and tip their foreheads together and tell him to calm down before he does something he regrets, but Joseph keeps going. “Do you even care about her John? Or about your entry into Eden? Because in case you have forgotten your future depends on that woman.”

John nods numbly. How could he forget?

Joseph’s unspoken question is clear now:  _ when’s the last time you saw her? _

“The baptism. She—she could hardly stand, because of the bliss. She still got away though.“

“She did. That’s when the rumors started, around the resistance, I know you know this.”

There was no denying that. Their family discussed it once or twice in the small moments they had together. But with everything going on they couldn’t concern themselves with mere rumors. Eventually John forgot all about it. 

_ “Rook’s MIA.” _

_ “It’s been weeks.” _

_ “She’s back...just different.” _

_ “The resistance seems hesitant to put her out on the field.” _

John’s whole body tightens. Thick fear sludging through his veins as he opens his mouth. “Is she okay?”

“Come,” Joseph beckons with his fingers, turning quick on his heel. Not checking to see if John’s following. Over his shoulder Joseph’s speaks again, “I found her, hence the state I’m in.”

John’s eyes go wide at that, “You crossed paths with Rook and you’re just a little shaken?” John gives him a once over, looking for any signs of pain as Joseph practically hops down the steps leading outside. No limping or fatigue, no hesitant movements like he’s been restricted by any wounds. He’s as lively as ever when he reaches the truck he rode in on. Face taut with anger as he turns on his heel, fists grabbing around the handle as he takes a steadying breath. 

“You might not recognize her--I hardly did.”

John wishes he had looked away. That he had told Joseph to go back home and sleep off this fit of rage. Maybe when he was feeling better their family could call a meeting, that they didn't have to do this now. John would really rather not be subject to this.

He loves his brother though, so he gives him the respect to stand back and peer inside the backseat of Joseph’s van.

And he wants to be sick. A rush of nausea washes over him, fear quick to follow. Tangling his heart up tight until his chest aches and he feels like crying. He doesn’t know what to say when Rook looks up at him and whines. She’s half slumped over on herself, body bent at an awkward angle. 

It’s not her dirty, torn clothes that scares him, or her missing shoes, or even the bloody, matted mess her head has become--it’s her eyes. They’re milky white. A sight that he’s too used to, one he tries to avoid as much as possible by limiting trips to see his little sister.

“Is she…”

  
“An Angel.” It's a hard statement, one Joseph doesn't seem to mind giving. “I don’t believe so. We’ll have to call Faith, some of her people. If I hadn't caught this sooner...” Joseph sighs, runs a hand through his hair before his whole body goes lax with defeat. “Just help me get her inside.”

*****

She’s surprised that it took so long for someone to question her. She knows that everyone else knows. That people hear the clinking of glass bottles of bliss oil in her pack. People know that she carries a zip lock bag of those pretty flowers in her pocket. That she pushes alcohol away for her own choice of drug.

She’s more surprised that they have the audacity to suggest that she should take a break.

They wouldn’t last without her. So in the end, after she got sick of seeing dozens of good men and women die doing jobs she should’ve been doing, she jumps back into it. No one can argue, they need her. Even if her dirty little secret is out. 

People know she’s using the bliss in ways it shouldn’t be used. That she finds some place to hole up in just to get high. And it’s a beautiful high. She can’t get enough. 

She figures that if she lives long enough she just might regret succumbing to the bliss. Admittedly that day comes sooner than she expected. 

Rook plops herself down in a field devoid of people and sprinkles bliss across her nose. Breathing in deep she falls back to stare up at the sky. She gladly lets sparkles encroach on her vision. Happy for an escape from this world, the only one she’s found so far. 

She’s not sure how long she stays there. Ignoring her radio calls because this fantasy land where gunfire doesn’t exist and the sun is always shining is glorious. 

Soon she can’t feel her limbs. Everything is a blur of ghostly sounds that doesn’t reach her ears and colorful lights. She manages finally to stand, when the sun dips a little lower in the sky and she realizes that she has somewhere to be.

She shouldn’t be here, in this field. But where she has to go is elusive. And if she can’t remember it then maybe it wasn’t that important in the first place. 

She staggers when she walks, hands patting at her side for a weapon. She doesn’t find one (didn’t she have a gun?) but God must be on her side because she comes across a shovel left abandoned on the side of the road.

It’s rusty and painted with blood. But it makes her feel safe for reasons she can’t explain. 

She stumbles along wearily, feet heavy, mind getting foggier and foggier until she can’t ever remember her name. Which should be concerning, but for some reason she can’t bring herself to worry. A wave of serenity washes over her and she’s back to just walking. 

She hears the truck coming behind her, she just can’t bring herself to care. And by the time some small part of her brain shouts that  _ something is wrong,  _ they’re already on her. Coming to a stop and drawing their guns. Yelling out commands she can’t hear past her heartbeat in her ears. 

The bliss bullet she expects doesn’t come. Because she’s lucid enough to know these are Joseph’s men, that the man stepping out of the lead truck is Joseph himself. It’s hard not to recognize him when he’s to blame for what has happened to her. For all the sleepless nights spent trying to get her next fix. 

He approaches her with his hands up, facing her in a show of good faith. It makes her feel like nothing more than a wild animal. Did he forget how dangerous she is?

It’s insulting. 

And for some reason that seems enough at the moment for her to charge him. 

_ Then  _ the bliss bullet hits her. 

*****

John’s scared. It’s not often that he’s afraid, it’s a foreign feeling. To have a beast like fear coiling in his gut threatening to maim. 

He knows Joseph isn’t faring any better. He’s sitting now, no longer wearing a rut in John’s floors, but his knee won’t stop bouncing. And he jumps whenever the room they’re keeping Rook in opens. He doesn’t run to the doctors anymore when they retreat, mostly because Jacob had snapped at him prior. An angry snarl telling Joseph to “let them do their damn job.” 

Now it’s a waiting game. The three of them sitting like strangers inside his ranch, waiting for good news. For Faith and her people to emerge and let them know that Rook could be saved.

“Brothers.”

Joseph’s up before any of them. Gripping Faith by her forearms until Jacob shakes him off. 

“I’m sorry, Joseph,” she immediately says, which really does nothing to make John feel better. “She’s...gosh I don’t even know how to say it. She’s hooked, I guess. The day John baptized her was her first experience with the bliss. And ever since,” she gestures weakly towards the door behind her. 

“Is she an Angel?” Jacob’s arms are folded over his chest, eyes calculating and distant. He’s not fooling John, who knows his brother despite their time apart and separation in age. Jacob’s just as invested as all of them, and not because he’s afraid he’ll lose the tool he was making Rook become. 

“She’s close. You should look for yourself.”

Faith doesn’t follow them to see Rook, which makes John wonder how bad off their deputy is. If the person who churns out batches of Angles doesn’t want to see this one. 

But John understands. As soon as he sees her sitting up beneath smooth sheets, he gets it. 

It’s unnerving, her milky white eyes that no longer holds the spark of life John used to love so much. And her smile…

“What do we do?” Joseph’s voice is tiny when he speaks. Unwilling to get any closer to her. 

Jacob shifts on his feet, head bowing with a wince. “Put her down.” 

“She’s not some  _ dog,  _ Jacob.”

John‘s lips twist, he doesn’t know what they should do. He doesn’t want to consider her being lost to them forever. 

“Maybe,” John finally murmurs after minutes of arguing, “maybe we rework the bliss.”

There’s a heaviness in the air when his words die. 

Joseph lets out a strangled sob. “It’s not supposed to do this. It’s not supposed to be like all those other drugs that break apart families and destroy lives.” 

He locks eyes with John and he knows they’re thinking of the same thing. All the times Joseph had stumbled into John’s apartment and had found him strung out.

“It’s  _ sinful.”  _ Joseph mumbles. Suddenly clarity making his back straighten. “I want it gone.” He’s not necessarily addressing any one of them, but his message is clear all the same. “I want every field burnt and the water supply restored to how it was before. We can’t let this happen, not to Rook. She’s our only salvation.” 


	42. Sharing (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joseph and Rook have been sleeping with each other for quite a while, long enough for her to finally trust him. He reveals that he’s got a kink, she thinks the kink is mild but its actually him watching his brothers fuck her

Joseph’s going to make her come again. He knows that too, the bastard. She can tell in the way he smiles at her, glancing up momentarily from where he’s kneeling between her thighs. She thought, foolishly, that she’d be able to coax him into fucking her. That tonight would be the night when he finally pins her against his mattress, just to show her how good they are together.

Apparently God wouldn’t approve of that.

“Joseph—stop, just wait.”

Surprisingly he does. Which is enough of a shock to leave her gasping, hips rocking up into nothing but air instead of his skilled tongue. “Please fuck me.”

“Darling,” his face softens, he feels for her, he really does, “you know we can’t.”

“I’m sure you’ll be forgiven.”

“That’s not for either of us to decide.” He frowns, though it holds no heat, not when his beard is slick with her juices. “I want to please you, Rook. And this...this is all I can give you for now.” 

Rook whines when he puts his mouth back on her pussy. Tongue flicking out to play with her clit. “Is bondage okay?” She gasps, so close she’s seeing stars. “Like—any kinks?” Because she can only imagine what he’ll let her do to him if she can bring some rope into this bedroom. At least draw this out in the future, have a little more fun. 

The  _ fucking bastard  _ pulls back to answer her question. The tight knot that had been coiling inside her belly disappears quickly. He smiles at her when she huffs. “Of course.”

“Then why didn’t you—Christ, Joseph!” She yelps when he goes back in, tongue parting her walls and lapping up her slick. 

“Language,” he reminds her gently. A single finger circling around her entrance before plunging fully inside. “I don’t want to scare you, darling, by giving too much. This…just like this, has to do for now.”

“C’mon. Give me something.” She reaches down to pet his cheek, wondering not for the first time if Joseph is as vanilla as he seems. “You’ve gotta have something that gets you hard at night.” She notes his flushed cheeks and wonders if she hit a nerve. “Any little fantasies?” 

“Most do.” He crooks a finger inside her, murmuring in approval at her tightness. 

“M’not talking about most. I’m talking about you.  _ The Father.” _

He groans at his title. Head falling on her inner thigh as he fucks her on his fingers. He pumps his digit in and out, stretching her until he can just barely slip in two. It won’t be enough, she wants his cock. 

Joseph pushes his face back where it was before, licking a strip up her folds until she’s arching up off the bed. “Joseph, please, let me come.” 

He hums in response, the vibration sending sparks through her body until her thighs are bracketing around his head and squeezing. Trying to make the most of this, grinding her hips up through her orgasm, only stopping when he makes a sort of choking gasp. Hand patting frantically at her thigh. 

She releases him with a sigh. Legs falling limp on the bed. 

Rook watches him wearily, their conversation still making rounds in her head. She has a feeling that she wears his patience thin. He can do so much better, she knows this. They’re are dozens of women in the project willing to kneel before him and offer up their bodies. But he chose  _ her.  _ Even as witty and dangerous as she is. Even if she pesters him endlessly about having sex and disobeying his God. 

“I can finish you off,” she offers weakly, sitting up to stretch. And she catches him staring from the end of the bed. His bare chest is rising heavily as his eyes flicker over her breasts. Taking in the flash of dusty, pink nipples. 

“Joseph.” 

“Hm?”

“I offered something.” She drops her gaze to his leaking erection. 

He nods. Quiet. “You wouldn’t judge me, Rook, right?” 

There’s a thousand things she could say, and right now the only thing coming to mind is something taunting. A teasing jab at his religion. That judging him isn’t her job, but God’s.

She nods a ‘yes,’ hopes her placidity will speed things along. Maybe get his cock inside her next time.

“I may have something...of a little...kink.” He breathes out his words, turning them into a whisper. “I trust you, and I love you.”

She cringes at his declaration. At the empty space of silence that always follows when he says that but she never repeats. 

“Do you trust me, Rook?” 

That’s an easier question to answer. “Yes.” She crawls to where he’s sat, a smile curling her lips up when he can’t help but flush at the sight of her naked body. 

She reaches up to card her fingers through his hair. Tugging at the loose strands that came undone. She drops her hand to the scruff on his face and cups his cheek. “Guess I owe Addie $20.” She laughs at his unamused glare. “Well, go on, what is it?”

“No, no, I want it to be a surprise. That’s half the fun,” he smiles at her, but it’s tight. Anxiety is flowing through his blood stream. 

“Ah,” Rook laughs, her head dropping to bump against his shoulder. He’s sweaty, and he smells the part. It’s intoxicating in a way it shouldn’t be. “I get it. Okay.” Without thinking she kisses him. Pushes her tongue inside his mouth when she asks permission with a swipe against his bottom lip and he opens up with a whimper. 

“I trust you,” she repeats one last time, wondering if this is the day where she finally regrets starting this thing between the two of them. 

*****

It takes a full month before Joseph calls her again. He texts her daily; exclusively on the phone he gifted her that is locked so no signal gets out of the county. And that was the first thing she tried because she still has a job to do. 

The texts are infuriating. He dances around what’s so obviously on her mind. She’s waiting for him to ask her over, for him to tell her how badly he misses her. That he keeps thinking about her mouth around his cock and her sprawled out in his bed. Instead he sends her pictures of the greenery in his compound, of the shadowy interior of his church just as people flood the pews. Sometimes, if she’s really lucky, he sends a picture of himself. He’s good at it too, less self conscious when posing then she thought he’d be. But even the selfies of him just waking up and a sleepy with bed head does little to placate her. 

When he calls her, she’s busy. Go figure. She’s getting drunk at the Spread Eagle, leaning heavily on Kim, probably the only sober one in here. Kim’s rolling her eyes and laughing as Nick and Sharky belt out a tune to a song that Rook doesn’t quite recognize. 

There’s a buzzing in her pocket, an annoyance at best that she intends to ignore until Kim nudges her with a raised brow.

“You still carry your phone?” 

She blinks, mind sluggish to catch up to Kim’s words. Then she nods, lightning quick in a way that makes the muscles in her neck cinch painfully. Rook smiles, lies flowing out of her lips flawlessly. “Force of habit. My parents would call me every Saturday and I…” she trails off, feigning a hopelessness that isn’t really fake. She ends it with a shrug, pulling back to toy with a loose strand on her jeans that’s coming undone. “Thought maybe one they’ll figure out how to reach me.” 

“Fuck.” Kim nods bleakly, sips at her lemonade and purses her lips. “Well someone’s calling, huh? Maybe you got lucky.”

Rook shakes her head, already off her bar stool to get some peace outside. “Doubt it. Probably some scam call.” She’s out the door before Kim can respond. The cool air does her some good, wakes her up just a tad until she thinks she can carry a conversation and she fishes her phone out of her pocket. 

“Hello?”

“Rook,” it’s Joseph, sounding somewhere between relieved and surprised, “I didn’t think you’d answer.”

“I did.”

“Yes well…”

She doesn’t have time for this. She’s drunk and starting to feel tired. “What did you need?”

“I just—are you free tonight. Right now?”

She bites down on a few scathing remarks, wanting to bring up that this is getting awfully close to a booty call. “Sure.” Her words slur and she curses under her breath for not being able to hide it better. “Should I go to your place?” Rook pushes herself forward, eyeing up the ATV she rode in on. 

“Rook, where are you?”

She winces, there’s a good chance he heard the cacophony in the bar behind her. They aren’t exactly quiet. “Spread Eagle.” 

“Are you drunk?”

No use lying to Joseph. He sees right through her, always. “Jus’ a little.” 

“Let me send someone to get you.” 

She laughs, patting her pockets to look for keys that have seemingly disappeared. “Yeah that won’t look suspicious.”

“John can grab you, his car doesn’t have our cross on it. Just a black van. And tinted windows,” he adds softly, in that same coaxing voice that led her into his bed. 

“Fine,” she caves, mostly because she can’t find her keys and she’s not walking. “Be quick. It’s fucking cold.”

He murmurs something she misses, because she’s already pulling the phone away from her ear, brows furrowed when she realizes that he didn’t chastise her on cursing. And that alone should have been the first red flag.

*****

She’s too out of it to question John, to ask where he’s taking her or why he isn’t putting up some kind of fuss that he’s been dragged out of bed for this. Though, when she peers closer, she notes that he doesn’t look sleepy. 

His hair is styled like it always is, tight blue button up devoid of wrinkles. He’s more than alert, she’d even go as far to call his mood  _ excited.  _

She must’ve dozed off once or twice, because each time she opens her eyes the scenery out the windshield is different. Then suddenly she blinks and they’re pulling up to John’s ranch.

Rook squirms in her seat, craning her head to get a better view of the hulking building. She tries to school her expression, but John laughs and she knows she’s been caught. 

John’s quiet during the walk into his house, another sign that maybe she shouldn’t have accepted Joseph’s invitation so readily. He’s got an iron grip on her forearm, only releasing her when they’re in his living room and Joseph rounds the corner with a smile. 

“Darling,” he croons softly, pulling her into a tight embrace. “How are you?”

“Fine.” She’s terse with him. Short. And she has every right to be, she has a feeling he’s starting to think that he has a right to call for her and she should be expected to follow. “Why am I here?”

John laughs from somewhere behind her. “Is she always this suspicious?” 

Joseph ignores him, so she does too. He strokes her cheek and leans in closer, until his lips brush her ear. “Do you remember our last conversation? That little kink I had?” 

Her knees go weak instantly at his words. The last month had been more hectic than she would’ve liked, so yes, it might’ve slipped her mind. 

“Come, I’ll show you.”

“We’re—we’re going to do it now?”

“That’s the plan.”

Rook’s buzzing with anticipation, hardly able to keep pace with Joseph as he leads her up John’s winding staircase. She’s too wrapped up in her own ideas of what Joseph could possibly be into that she doesn't notice John following right on her heels. And she hasn't asked why exactly this needs to be done in his ranch. She just wants to fuck.

So she isn’t too aware of how strange it is that Joseph guides her inside a bedroom where Jacob’s lounging and that John just closed the door behind them. 

But then Joseph’s speaking and it all falls into place. 

“I thought that perhaps there’s a way around it all. It isn’t right that I take you, not until the collapse comes along, but my brothers…”

She’s gone a scary shade of pale, she knows she has by the way Joseph’s quick to ramble. 

“It’s not sinful. Or wrong. I think it’s supposed to happen. You see, I’ve found someone so great and perfect, who am I to keep you all to myself?”

Rook doesn’t like this. Not one bit. She’s shaking, her entire body trembling as she catches Jacob in the periphery of her vision begin to stalk towards her. 

“Joseph.”

“Hush, my love. Let my brothers show you how much they adore you. How important you are to this Project.” 

John grabs her first. His hands on her waist as he comes at her from behind. His fingers slip to the button on her jeans, unclasping it deftly before she has a chance to protest. Jacob holds her arms across her chest when she struggles. 

They’re so much stronger than her. It’s a losing battle. 

She tries anyway. Despite how they tear her clothes off and toss her on the bed flat on her stomach, she squirms and kicks. She manages to catch John in his stomach, her heel bouncing off of a slim body. He curls over briefly before that nasty snarl is back on his face and he yanks her pants down in one smooth motion. 

Rook yelps when she feels John’s hands grab the globes of her ass. Spreading her cheeks apart only to pull back and spank her. The force of it makes her jump, has her trying to scramble away on her knees, but then Jacob’s there too. Standing by the side of the bed to push a knee in the center of her back to keep her down. 

“Joseph,” she cranes her head around until she finds him. Sitting on an ottoman, half slouched over and staring at her with hooded eyes. 

“What is it, darling?”

She whines, legs kicking out nervously when John’s nails dig into her hips only to drag her up on her knees, forcing her upper half against the bed. She flushed red when she realizes that she’s presented for him perfectly, her ass on display. 

“Please. I don’t—why can’t it just be us?”

He sighs, like he expected as much. With a wave of his hand his answers, “we’ve gone over this. I’m not wasting anyone's time by explaining once more.” 

Jacob’s hands distract her, they’re tugging at her shirt, pulling it over her head with a satisfied hum. He snaps her bra strap and though she can’t see his face she’s sure he delights in her squeal of shock. 

“Gonna take this off for me, honey? Maybe make this a little easier.”

Rook sobs. She brings her hands up to wildly claw and scratch. To mar Jacob, he catches her hands easily and shoves them down with a snarl. Jacob’s previous order goes answered at that and John’s hands go to unclasp her bra. 

John lifts her upper body until he can wrangle her bra off. It’s tossed somewhere on the floor, in the ever growing large pile of her shirt and jeans. 

It takes everything in her not to scream and curse Joseph. Accuse him of a myriad of things. Tell him how manipulative he is. That he got her to  _ trust  _ him. He didn’t have the right. 

She’s numb as the last couple of months of whatever relationship they had swirls through her mind. Her body’s like putty when John removes her panties and she’s flipped over on her back. 

John grabs her ankles and rips them open, shuffling closer with a sparkle in his pretty blue eyes. 

“Hold her for a minute,” John instructs, and Jacob’s hands are on her, pushing her down into the mattress as he takes this time to undress himself. 

John does the same for Jacob. Keeps her held down until they’re all naked. 

She doesn’t get any warning when John pushes inside her. He just does. He spreads her legs and palms at her ass and plunges inside her. Her walls clench around him immediately with surprise. She’s shamefully wet, making his entrance all the more easier.

He groans as he bottoms out, nails digging into the plush flesh around her hips. “See? Your body knows what you want.” He’s mocking her, his tone cynical before he cuts himself off with a groan. 

She’s shaking, trying not to give him any sort of reaction. She wants to move, to scramble away, but she knows what that’ll do. That he’ll get dragged out of her and that she won’t be able to control the noises she makes. 

John pulls out slowly, head bent with eyebrows furrowed, practically mesmerized by the sight of his dick sliding in and out of her pussy. 

She buries her head in the mattress, but then Jacob’s hand is in her hair and yanking her to face him. He’s still standing at the side of the bed, though his cock is out now. And she’s at the perfect eye level to it. 

Jacob jams her forward on his length, forcing her mouth around it. Rook gags, jaw not quite wide enough to take him. 

“You bite me and I’ll cut your fucking tongue out.” 

She chokes at the threat, mouth widening so as not to even scrape her teeth against his sensitive skin. 

His hand stays on the back of her head, guiding her. John’s thrusts, growing faster, pushes her into Jacob’s dick. Makes her sputter and whine each time his cock head brushes the back of her throat. 

It’s an intoxicating mix of feelings that she’s not too sure she can keep up with. 

“Such a good girl for us,” John murmurs, hands petting along her flank. “Taking my cock so  _ well.  _ God look at that.” When he pulls out next he doesn’t immediately jam back inside. Only the tip is left in her cunt. And she whimpers at the pain that brings. Her lips wrapping around Jacob’s dick tighter instinctively to try and quiet herself.

All it does is make Jacob groan and has John laughing. 

“That’s right, Rook. Take your pleasure.”

“Fucking shut up, John.” 

John huffs and slides back in. Jostling her forward. She yelps, though it’s muffled from the intrusion stuffed inside her mouth. 

Jacob’s close, she can tell despite how quiet he is. His hand grows tighter in her hair, his thrust more demanding. Then he’s shooting off into her mouth, coating her throat with his seed. Staking a claim because when he pulls out she still tastes him. 

John’s quick to follow. Slamming inside her with a last couple of hard jerks until he’s finishing inside her. He lets out a guttural moan, leaning over her with a fish curled into the sheets beside her head. 

“So beautiful,” John praises, kissing her cheek, seemingly not at all bothered by the way she tried to escape his lips. “Did we do right by her, Joseph?” 

Rook can’t see Joseph, but she hears his thoughtful hum of approval. “Leave us, brothers. We’ve much to speak about on Rook’s new future alongside us.” 


	43. Wedding Bells

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook’s pregnant, but she doesn't know which of the Seeds in the father. Thankfully Joseph knows the perfect solution is for Rook to marry all three of them

“Do you like it?”

Rook does her best to hold back tears. She hardly knows this woman, she shouldn’t break down in front of her. But it hits Rook hard all of a sudden that this is real. That just maybe there’s life outside of all the fighting that’s been going on. 

“It’s gorgeous,” she finally murmurs, swiping at her eyes roughly. 

The woman laughs, rocking on her heels. “John was very specific about what he wanted.”

Rook doesn’t know what to say, only that she can’t help but think  _ of course John would give her a beautiful dress. He’s got a killer fashion sense.  _

“Would you like to try it on?”

It’s not the conventional sort of day she expected when trying on wedding dresses. She imagined—at least when she was younger—her mother and her bridesmaids oohing and ahhing at the dresses she tried on. She figured that it might take hours before she found the right one, the one that made her feel like a princess.

Instead she’s in the spare room Joseph has to offer standing with a member of his flock who’s staring at her like she’s just as important as her heralds. 

She can’t complain about the dress though. It’s…

“You’re breathtaking, deputy Rook.”

A faint blush paints her cheeks at the compliment. The dress is form fitting, hugging her waist and the curves she has. It’s made out of delicate lace, embroidered with swirling patterns of flowers. The top is...revealing, but she’d expect nothing less from John. It dips further than a sweetheart neckline, in fact, it cuts so far that her whole sternum is on display, almost all the way down to her belly button. 

The cape like veil she’s been given makes up for it. It wraps around her throat and fans out, creating a lacy collar that adorns her shoulders as well. 

“Does Jacob and Joseph know about this dress?”

“I don’t believe so. John said that he wanted everyone to be surprised.” 

Rook smiles at that, “then we best head to the church, right? Wouldn’t want to keep them in suspense any longer.”

*****

“I hope it fits her.”

Jacob glances at John through the mirror. Watching him fiddle with his sleeves. 

“Why wouldn’t it?”

“She’s pregnant, Jacob.” John stresses the word ‘pregnant’ like Jacob hasn’t realized. As if he also didn’t take Rook to bed and fuck her the same as John and Joseph. “She’s already showing—“

“Hardly.”

“Still.” 

Jacob shakes his head, there’s no use in telling John that everything’s going to be okay. He doesn’t have Joseph’s faith or Jacob’s willingness to roll with the punches. 

At the end of the day Jacob’s not too sure why Rook agreed to this. He’s almost positive it’s because of her baby. He couldn’t imagine trying to raise a child by yourself in Hope County, especially when everyone still expects you to be a warrior and risk your life when you’ve got someone to care for. 

“Someone woulda called if it didn’t fit, John.”

“Yes…you’re...I guess you’re right.”

Jacob nods, eyes flitting back towards John. “You look smart,” he said eventually, watching the strange shift of emotions on John’s face. “Handsome.” 

“You think so?”

“Wouldn’t have said it otherwise.”

John finally stops adjusting his clothes and breathes deeply. “Then we should get going. Joseph’s probably wondering where we are.” 

*****

Rook finds the pews  _ filled  _ with people. It’s the first thing she notices when she’s ushered in. There’s the tiniest jab of disappointment when she scans the faces and realizes that her friends have declined her invitation. If she hadn’t asked them herself, if she left that up to the Seeds, she’d think they hadn’t asked anyone at all considering no ones here. 

She can’t find it in her to be sad for long. Because when she casts a glance around their tiny church it hits her how much effort went into this.

There are bouquets of flowers and pretty crystal lights all strung up. It makes her pause in the aisle before she sets her eyes on her groomsmen. 

A blush rises in her cheeks, they clean up well. 

Faith loops her arm through her own—a lack of her own father makes her heart pang again painfully—and starts to walk with her. 

When she finally reaches them, she’s a tight bundle of anxiety. She’s shaking with nerves when Joseph begins to speak. 

His eyes are shining with something bright as he addresses them all.

“We are gathered here today, to celebrate a moment of prosperity and love that my family never thought would pass.” He steps forward, away from his brothers and beside her, to spread his arms wide towards the heavens. “Let us pray. Eternal God, creator and preserver of all life, giver of all grace: Bless and sanctify with your Holy Spirit, who come now to join in marriage. Grant that we may give our vows to one another.”

Rook smiles at him when he turns, reaching out to squeeze his hand when he falls back in line beside his brothers. It’s not the kind of conventional wedding she hoped, but she didn’t think anyone here knew how a wedding among four people was meant to go. 

With that in mind she nodded confidently to John, letting him go first. He’s radiating confidence when he steps closer to her, reaching out to grasp her hands and offer her a wavering smile that really shows how excited he is. 

His eyes flicker down to her stomach and she watches him suck in a breath. She knows he must be imagining the nights they shared between them. Filled with equal measure lust and guilt. He’s probably thinking about the time she told him she was pregnant, when she gathered all three of them on mutual territory and broke the news, expecting rage. 

Instead she has this.

“Rook,” John casts a glance over the crowd, chest puffing out. “I never thought that this is where we’d end up when we first met. Hell, I never thought in a million years that I’d find myself in a church getting married. My parents told me I was sinful, that no one would love me, that I wasn’t worth the time of day. And I believed them. For years I thought they were right, but here I am.”

He gives a tiny shrug, glancing down carefully and averting his eyes from her. She’s close to crying, there are tears threatening to drop at how heartfelt his message was. 

He takes a step near to her, hand close to raising to her stomach before he stops himself. Now is not the time, they’ve agreed Jacob and Joseph need to talk before she does, so for now he steps back beside his brothers and waits. 

Joseph’s next, and he’s radiant when he copies John’s actions and holds her hands. 

“My love, I’m not too sure words can explain how happy you’ve made me. Just seeing my brothers light up when you’re around...you’ve made life perfect for us. When the Voice took my first wife from me—my daughter—I didn’t think he had meant for me to have a family of my own. I thought I was only the Father to my flock, nothing more. But now...oh, my love,” he tips his head towards her, letting their foreheads touch in a show of affection. 

“I love you.” 

The omission has her shaking when he pulls away. And by the time Jacob’s standing before her she’s not any more composed. 

He’s not a man of many words, even now, when she’s slept with him and when she’s bearing a child that he’ll raise. She doesn’t expect much when he opens his mouth to speak. 

“I think you already know how much I care about you, Rook. I wouldn’t be standing here today if I didn’t. And you know I don’t let people in easily, but you’re different. You’re  _ strong.  _ I think—“ he pauses, shifting uncomfortably, “I know I want to live with you for the rest of my life. Even I’m not too sure why you chose me. I’m glad you did.” 

Then all eyes are on her. Everyone’s staring, watching her with pride. It dawns on her that these people want her, these Peggies, they accept her already. They’ve forgiven her for her transgression. Her child will be safe here, and that’s all that matters. 

She twists her hands in front of her anxiously and  _ breathes.  _

“I’ll admit that initially I didn’t love any of you, what we did together was pure stress relief. It was selfish and wrong. But I spent more time with you all and I just can’t imagine being any more loved. You all trust me to have let me in this far in, so I promise you that I want this.” 

It’s now that John steps forward, as his request earlier, and produces the ring he bought. It glistened in the lights as he holds it between his fingers, stopping before her with the kind of grace she’d expect from him. 

“I, John Seed, take you, Rook  _ Seed _ , to be my wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy law, and this is my solemn vow.” 

The band he slips on her finger sealed the deal. And now, he finally presses his hand over her stomach and  _ smiles _ . 


	44. Radio Call (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The brothers are having dinner together and their radio is on when Rook just so happens to admit to her true feelings on the Seeds

“The pasta’s burnt.”

“Stop it, John.”

“Jacob—“

“Don’t.”

John throws up his hands with a scoff. Eyes straying over to the kitchen. To where Joseph is putting the rest of their meal together. 

“We never get to do this,” Jacob points out, reaching out to tap the back of John’s hand. “C’mon, try to enjoy it.”

John settles back into his chair, yanking his hand away like Jacob burnt him. He crosses his arms petulantly over his chest, pouting when Joseph walks back over to them. 

“What’s wrong?” Joseph asks, hands tightening around the steaming crock pot he lies on the table. “What happened to John? I was gone for two minutes.” 

“He’s fine, Joe.” When Joseph looks at him, he doesn’t seem convinced. Eyes skipping between the two of them. “Upset he didn’t get to wine and dine for us. Treat us like royalty.” Jacob waves his hand and raises his eyebrows, a sort of  _ you know how he is,  _ look on his face. 

Joseph just smiles, appeased as he slips into his seat. He lifts the lid off the pot and finally, John perks up. 

“Oh that smells good.” 

Jacob gruffs out a laugh and rolls his eyes. Then he glances down and realizes what John had been doing. 

“Do you gotta bring work to the table, John?” When his baby brother stares at him blankly, more focused on the food Joseph’s piling onto their respective plates, Jacob elaborates. “Your radio.” He jerks his head down to where said radio is held below the table. 

“I wanted to see if I was missing anything.”

Joseph sighs, shoving their plates back their way so they could start eating. “You’re men are listening, they’ll let you know.”

“Yes well—“

_ “I don’t know, Sharky, they’ve done some bad shit.” _

John’s back goes straight, brows drawing down for a moment when his radio squeals. His mouth opens slightly in a smile that he shares with his brothers, they  _ know _ that voice. Their little Rook. 

_ “Hey, you’d be surprised about the amount of people who wanna fuck one of the Seeds.“ _

Joseph chokes on the next inhale, grasping his chest and staring wide eyed at John. He swats at John’s arm and hisses softly “turn that off!” 

“But it’s getting interesting…” John murmurs coyly, a giddy spark in his baby blues. “C’mon, Joseph.”

Joseph grabs onto John’s wrist, conflicted and unsure. 

_ “So is that a no, Dep?” _

_ “I mean…” _

_ “Aha! I knew it! C’mon, your secret’s safe with me.”  _

There’s a light huff of amused air.  _ “I’m too fucking drunk for this.”  _

They hear Sharky’s booming laughter as an answer, and in the following silence John speaks. Only briefly wondering where the pair could be. 

“That answers your question, Joe...if she drinks. If she’ll be easy to scrub clean. After all the killing—and now this—see, good thing we listened. Now we know how hard we must scrub her soul.”

“People should be aware they’re making a confession.” His gaze is pointed, but he does let go of John and dig into his food, something Jacob had done from the very beginning. He’s listening, just as invested as his brothers, but on the off chance she reveals her location and they want to go after her, he’ll be the one chasing her. He’s not doing that on an empty stomach. 

_ “Rook. Tell me.”  _ Even John can hear the lilting tease in her friend’s voice. 

_ “I mean...yeah, they’re hot. They all could, y’know—“  _ Joseph winces when they both laugh, only imagining what kind of gesture Rook’s making to her her point across, _ “they could get it.” _

_ “All of ‘em?!”  _

_ “Fuck yes, all of them.” _

_ “I dunno ‘bout that.” _

_ “Sharky!”  _ There’s the sound of Rook standing, ruffling clothes and a bottle clinking before she collapses down somewhere else.  _ “I’ll prove it to you. Move over, scoot.” _

John places the radio in the center of the table, picking up his own fork and digging into the dinner Joseph so carefully worked over. Though he’s more focused on what’s going to be said next and if he really wants to listen to it when his brothers are in the same room as him. 

No one bothers to shut off the radio, though, so he doesn’t do a thing. 

_ “Let’s talk about John.” _

_ “Y’know, I can actually understand that one, Rook. Women—men, too I bet—like what he’s got.” _

_ “Yeah but it’s not just his looks, and he does look mighty fine. It’s so much more. I mean, Sharky, he’s got those bedroom eyes down.” _

John knows for a fact that everyone in his dining room is horrified, him included, but on the other end of the line, Sharky doesn’t seem to mind. 

_ “Oh! And he’s definitely a tits kind of man. He’ll just play with ‘em all night I bet if he could. Teasing you, marking you up so everyone knows what’s his.”  _

John swallows thickly, his own cheeks turning pink when two sets of eyes turn towards him. 

“Uh, John—“

“Shut up, Joseph, please.” 

_ “What about Joseph? I don’t see the appeal. Man doesn’t have John’s playboy looks.” _

_ “Nah, but he’s still fine. I bet he's stronger than everyone thinks, I bet he could manhandle you—not that he would. That doesn’t seem his style.” _

_ “Does the pious fucker have a style?”  _

_ “Uh-huh, he’d be into that public shit. Making you kneel behind his pulpit as he preaches to the masses and you suck him off.” _

Sharky laughs, and it’s loud _ ,  _ makes Joseph jump and recoil. He wipes his sweaty palms on his jeans, mumbling a prayer under his breath. 

_ “Jacob.”  _ John can tell that it’s a challenge coming from her friend. A way to say that there’s no way she has anything nice to say about Jacob.

But their deputy has always been good at surprising them. 

_ “Easy.” She declares, and the smile in his voice is evident. “Have you seen that man’s hands? Like fucking paws. Oh my god he’s strong, built like a tank.” _

_ “Think he’s got any kinks?” _

_ “They all do, if you haven’t been listening…” _

_ “M’not sure I  _ want  _ to listen anymore, you’re gonna regret telling me this later.”  _

_ “Well. Maybe. Anyway, yes, he’s probably got a few. A breeding kink, maybe a size thing going on. He’s gotta, with how damn big he is. He isn’t young, but I bet he could go quite a few rounds. Leave you sore.” _

_ “Surprised you didn’t mention the dudes obsession with wolves.” _

Rook laughs, and she must’ve kicked her legs out because there’s the rattle of a table before she speaks again. 

_ “Thought that’d be too far. But honestly, I wouldn’t put it past him to buy you a little collar and leash, he likes that control.”  _

Jacob chuckles. He rips into a piece of meat skewered on his fork and laughs. “She’s dirty, huh?” He’s the only one who isn’t insanely embarrassed, and really John shouldn’t be surprised. 

Jacob wipes his dirty hands on his jeans and reaches for the radio, snarling at John when he tries to grab it first. John’s eyes are wide, curious more than anything. Jacob knows his baby brother, he knows how much he wants the deputy, the same as all of them really. John would never admit it in front of them, too keen on impressing his family. 

“Think we should end this.” Jacob explains with a shrug, pressing down on the bulging button on the side. 

“Rook, honey?” 

There’s a brief pause and Jacob wonders if she’ll answer at all, as drunk as she is. Then there’s a slew of muted curses, angry things that make Joseph wince. They hear Rook scramble around before she's speaking. Ragged breaths panting out.

_ “Uh…” _

“Hush,” Jacob commands, no false pretenses or niceties. He’s never shown her any different, and she doesn't deserve that now. 

Rook, in character to the stubborn thing they know best, doesn't listen to Jacob.  _ “What did you hear? _ ” She sounds horrified, enough for John to snort into a cupped palm.

“Enough to know that you want us bad.”

_ “Jacob—Jacob hey, look, maybe this could stay between us, yeah? We could make a deal?” _

Jacob hears hope rise in her voice and for a second he’s tempted to tug her along. Make her his obedient puppy like she insinuated earlier. Instead though, he laughs. “Think it’s too late for that.” He barrels on, doesn't let her get a word in edgewise. “They’re here with me. Heard every single dark fantasy.”

Her breath catches,  _ “and?”  _

“And you better start running, honey.” 


	45. Perfect (NSFW) [pt 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jacob and John view Rook as the perfect woman to mother their children and have a competition to see who can knock her up first

John leans back against his pillows and sighs. With half lidded eyes he drops his hand to his night stand and yanks open the drawer. It doesn’t take long for his fingers to curl expertly around the small baggie he tossed there about a week ago. He’d been saving it for something special—and this was a special night indeed. 

He takes the joint between his lips and flicks on his lighter, careful to make sure his beard doesn't go up in flames. 

“Really? You're gonna make me go back smelling like weed?” 

“It’s better than smelling of sex, my dear.”

Beside him he hears Rook snort. Out of the corners of his eye he sees her head lazily tip towards his window. They both know she’s too cozy to crawl out of bed just to crack one open. 

She curls further into the blankets with a huff, slightly angling herself towards him. Her hand grabs his bicep, nails digging in as she drags herself close. She ends up throwing a leg over his, resting her head on his chest as she traces swirling patterns on his skin that's inconsistent with any tattoo or scar he’s got. 

He makes a face, teasing. “We’re cuddling now?” Not like he minds. He enjoys the way her body feels pressed against him. Radiating nothing but warmth and comfort. 

“We are,” she confirms through a yawn. She arches her back up, blanket slipping down some, revealing one perky nipple. He does a cursory glance and feels his cock twitch with interest. He tries to push that down, she’s tired as it is and he knows how lucky he is just to have her stay for as long as she is after the kind of fucking they had. 

He squirms when she burrows into him, her thigh nudging the softness of his cock, it’s then that he feels the tackiness on her skin. If he cared to look underneath the blankets he’d find what’s running out from between her legs. The evidence of their sin. 

“Staring,” she murmurs, tugging the blanket up. 

He chuckles, taking a deep drag and releasing a plume of smoke. “You like the attention.” Another drag, one that makes his chest ache beautifully. “Besides, when have you ever been shy?”

She shrugs and drops the cloth covering her. Raising her eyebrows as a challenge when he smiles around the blunt pressed to his lips. 

He stretches, goes to wrap an arm around her shoulders and pull her in. “You certainly were showing off a couple of minutes ago.” He stares down at her with a tip of his head, feeling a pleasant thrum of heat course through his belly when her breasts push against his abdomen. 

Rook flushes at his comment. He’s sure they both can picture what a pretty sight she made sitting on top of his hips. Riding him with all she had, hands planted firmly on his chest to keep him down as she grinded her ass on his cock. She’d taken him raw this time, so eager to get him inside her that safety was thrown out the window. Not that he cared. She all but lept onto him, shoved him down and tossed the condom to the side with a snarl. 

She grabbed hold of his cock like her life depended on it. Laving her tongue deliciously over the curved piercing near his tip. Teasing with teeth and anger. 

Now she’s docile, which is something he’s having a hard time putting together. Then again she never really stays long enough for him to see her sleepy from sex. She hobbles out the back door looking a little weary, but it’s never gone further than that. Something’s different now. Maybe whatever’s going on between them finally clicked inside her head. Maybe one day soon she’ll finally say yes. 

He won’t hold his breath though. 

He plucks the blunt from his mouth and blows the smoke away from her. When he turns back she’s staring at him. Tracking the joint held between his fingertips. 

“Wanna taste?” 

“Ahh...I dunno. It’s hard enough to not get killed in this county. Can’t imagine what it’d be like if you’re high.” 

“You don’t have to leave, you could always, y’know, stay the night.” 

She chuckles and it’s heavy with sleep, “sure. Fuck it, why not?”

John’s scared to question it, so he doesn’t. She’ll leave eventually. That never changes. Next morning she’ll be running to his brother. For now though, she’s his. 

He holds the blunt for her, let’s her lean forward—pressing her pretty tits further into him—as she takes it between pursed lips. 

He watches her closely with a smile and waits for—

Her throat bobs and she coughs. Pulling away to breathe it in, trying to preserve some shred of the drug. She’s not full on hacking, not her first time then, but it’s been awhile. An old habit that creates a deep ache within you when you revisit it. 

Her head drops to his chest again, eyes finally slipping closed. He finishes off the joint as her breathing evens out and her muscles go lax. John’s quick to follow her, never one to miss such an opportunity, he curls further down in the blankets and just holds her. Knowing full well that she’ll be raising hell come morning. 

*****

“Was John mad?” 

“John didn’t know. I was gone before he woke. Besides, he knows where I’m headed next. You both do.” Rook swings her feet back and forth when she hops up his desk. “And don’t talk about him.” She sounds suddenly cross, and it’s such a change that Jacob turns around from where he’d be rummaging through his closet just to see if he missed something. 

“Why not?” He tugs his shirt off, tossing it across the room just to annoy her. “I’m just curious.”

“Yeah?” She jumps down from his desk and smiles wickedly. “You really wanna hear how I spend nights with your brother? How I put him on his back or how he wraps his belt around my throat and fucks me into his bed? You want that?”

Jacob stares at her and pauses, eyes going dark before he laughs. “Christ honey, okay. Calm down, c’mere, I was joking.” He extends his hand and crooks his fingers. Beckons her forward. “Let me make it up to you.” 

It’s not his best line, but it doesn’t need to be. They both know that. Just the sound of his voice makes her swoon. 

The walk towards him vaguely feels like some sort of death march, but she doesn’t have time to dwell on that. She’s had so many chances in the past to run. To seek refuge with the resistance if she felt John or Jacob would hurt her. But she wouldn’t be able to do that to them, they’re growing on her. Like mold. 

He grasps her hand and makes her do a little spin. Showing her off. He yanks her forward without warning towards his chest. She gazes up at him with doe eyes, like he means something to her. 

“On the bed,” he commands, falling into their routine easily. “Hands and knees, get your ass in the air.” He swats at her cheek as she scrambles onto his bed. Anticipation is pulsing through her veins, it’s the overeagerness that has her hips wiggling. 

“Easy there, honey.” He warns, grabbing her hips and tugging her towards him. She’s still fully clothed, and that’s just one more level of control he has over her. 

Jacob’s quiet as he runs his hands up her thighs and across her ribs. Stopping when he cups her neck from behind. He squeezes and relishes in the sound of her gasping. 

It’s not a surprise when he leans forward, the hard press of his erection making her moan, and folds a piece of cloth over her eyes. It’s nothing new, but it’s exciting nonetheless. 

His hand comes from behind to undo her jeans. He pulls the zip down and undoes her button with a flick of his wrist. His pulls her pants down as much as they’ll go, which isn’t far at all, but it’s enough for a quick fuck. 

He lets out a low whistle, a sound that makes her cheeks burn. He brings his finger to her clothed slit. Rubbing in slow circles until he feels her wetness seeping through her panties. 

“You gonna need any prep?” 

Her head falls forward and she lets out a weak laugh, the image of what John and her did the other day floating to the forefront of her mind. “Don’t bother.”

Jacob grunts at that, though she knows he doesn’t mind. This war is far from over, he’s got months to play with her. 

Her panties come down next. Revealing her twitching cunt to him. It’s enough of a sight to make Jacob’s pants get a little tighter. 

“Can’t believe he lets a thing like you get away so often,” he marvels softly, pulling himself out and lining up. He holds his cock in hand and slides it through her folds. Circling around her clit. 

“You do the same thing, if anything you two let me leave. Roll out the red carpet,” she murmurs. That earns her a quick slap on her ass. One that has her yelping from shock. 

“Fucking shut up.” 

He shoves in then, bottoms out fully. His hips come flush with hers and her breath leaves her lungs. Her hands tighten in the bedsheets, bunching them up as he rocks into her. Wasting no time in starting the kind of fast pace she associates with no one else but Jacob. 

“Wait,” her hand comes back to grab at his jacket and  _ pulls.  _ Angry. “You’re not—don’t you have any condoms?” 

“Ah. Must’ve forgotten. Y’know, heat of the moment and all that.” He doesn’t stop fucking her, even when she manages to scratch his belly with sharp nails. His jeans rub against the back of her thighs, scratching her with each thrust. It’s a delicious kind of burn that makes her feel more sensitive. 

“C’mon, Rook, don’t go quiet on me.” He pounds into her harder, trying to make noises escape past her lips. “What’s wrong, huh? Are you mad at me? Or maybe,” he leans back with a groan, hand on his back, making her do all the work as she thrusts back and forth. “Maybe it finally hit you how bad this is? How much trouble you’ll get in if anyone found out?” He leans down then, covers his body with hers as his knees buckle slightly. 

“I’ll keep you safe,” he promises, kissing between her shoulder blades. 

His hand drops between her legs, getting past her jeans and pulling her hood back to find her tight nub. He rolls it gently, pushing down and tugging. Forcing a moan from her. 

“Ahh, there we go. That’s all I wanted, honey.” 

Rook keens at his voice and arches back into him as his fingers move faster. He keeps on like that until she’s cuming on his cock. Squeezing him for all she’s got, milking him, making him finish inside her. 

She stays like that, ass up in the air, even after he pulls out and fixes himself. 

“You gonna stay, honey?” 

He falls on the bed, making her come tumbling down on top of him. 

“Hm? Answer me.” 

“I—“ she winces as she shifts to sit next to him. She manages to shove her pants and panties down on the floor, unwilling to ruin them with the cum that’s pooling out of her cunt. “One condition.”

He chuckles, winding an arm around her bare waist. “Yeah? What’s that?”

“Wash these, will ya?” She kicks weakly at her pile of clothes and smiles up sweetly at him. 

That shocks a full on laugh out of him, “I think I can manage that. Now go on, get some sleep.”

Rook doesn’t argue with him on that. She curls up and burrows deep within his blankets, within the hour she’s out cold. Lying half naked in his bed—which does things to his head, to the part of his brain that wouldn’t mind having a woman like Rook in his life. 

He has to push that to the side though. He can’t get ahead of himself. 

*****

“You think she knows?”

“Why would she?” 

John purses his lips and shrugs. He’s gazing out of Jacob’s balcony, arms crossed as he leans against the doorframe. 

“We’re fine, John.” 

John doesn’t seem convinced, he sighs deeply—overdramatically—before sauntering over to Jacob’s desk. He falls down with a huff and glares at his brother.

“Don’t look at me like that.” Jacob gripes, frowning. “We’ve got an equal chance at this.”

“And if...when one of us succeeds? We never spoke of that.”

Jacob laughs crudely, twirling a pen around in his hand. “Yeah cause we never thought we’d get this far.” When John rolls his eyes, Jacob keeps going. “But you’re right. We didn’t speak about that.” 

“Are things going to change between us, Jake?” John’s voice goes soft, scared even. “I don’t want that.” 

“Hey,” Jacob leans forward, wishing that there wasn’t a desk separating them, “hey, listen to me, okay? It’s fine, John.  _ We’re  _ fine. If you knock her up first,” Jacob shrugs and leans back in his chair. Causal as can be. “That's fine. I’ll be happy for you, for having a family. I’ll have a niece or nephew.” Jacob laughs at how strange it sounds. To have more of a family than just his brothers and sister. 

“Same goes for you,” John nods quickly, trying to convince Jacob. “I’ll be happy for you.”

Jacob’s lips curl, he knows his brother better than that. “But you’ll keep trying.”

“Of course, and I wouldn’t expect you to do any different. Why shouldn’t we both have children with such a wonderful woman?” 

Their other brother comes to mind, but Jacob doesn’t say that. It’d only dampen the mood. 

Jacob shifts carefully, eyes straying to the monitors to his left. He hasn’t spotted Rook just yet with the cameras scattered through the mountains, but last he heard she was in the Henbane, taking a break from them. “So we're still on?”

“Yes.” John perks up, bouncing in his seat. “Absolutely,” he stands quickly, almost knocking the chair back onto the floor. “May the best win.” John extends his hand with a sparkle in his eye, smile widening when Jacob takes it. 

It’s on.

*****

“Fuck. Holy shit, John!” 

“Oh, I’m flattered, my dear. Does it really feel that good? Hm? Tell me.”

“Yes.” Her whole body shudders as he rocks upward. She scrambles to grab onto his shoulders, convinced that she’ll disappear into a pleasure drunk pile if she doesn’t find something real to hold onto. 

“John…”

“Ahh, yes.” He moans with her, arms winding around her waist as he bucks up into her throbbing heat. “Say my name, Rook. Let me hear you.” His feet plant firmly on the wooden floor, giving himself more leverage to fuck her. 

Her eyes slam shut as she feels his cock twitch deep inside her, nudging painfully against her cervix. “Are you going to cum?” He grabs the back of her neck and tugs her closer, kissing behind her ear. “Huh? Are you going to show me how good you are?”

“Please.” She rocks back and forth, meeting him thrust for thrust. “Please John.”

“I’ve got you. Don’t worry, you’re safe.” He reaches down to find her clit, stroking it slowly. Stoking the fire inside her. 

“Go ahead, cum my dear.”

She does so with a yelp. Whimpering into his neck and crying out his name until she goes limp in his arms. He continues to thrust into her pussy, intent on finding his own pleasure. 

She hits him weakly on the shoulder, not bothering to look up. “Wait—“ she swallows and winces at the oversensitivity. “Not in me...we can’t—“

“We can.” He assures her, holding her tighter, as if she has the strength to escape. He comes like that, his cock buried up to the hilt in her cunt. 

The only thing she does to show her anger is a quick nip to his shoulder. Though there’s hardly any heat behind it. 

“Stay,” he murmurs immediately, not yet slipping out of her. 

“I can’t.”

“You say that all the time. Please, darling. Stay?” He knows what he’s doing. That the pleading tone in his voice sounds so real, and it is, but she doesn’t know that. 

She sighs heavily, finally putting her feet under her and climbing off his lap. Her face screws up as she feels his seed run down her thigh. 

“Shower?”

He smiles. It’s all teeth. “Go right ahead, my dear.” 

He doesn’t take his eyes off her, following the sway of her hips as she disappears behind the bathroom door. 

There’s a slight hollowness in his chest as he hears the shower flick on. He knows she’s still here for the moment, that she’s  _ his,  _ but Jacob…

“John.”

He scrambles to grab a blanket, throwing it over his waist with a scowl. 

“Could’ve knocked.”

“I did.” Jacob shrugs, stuffing his hands in his pocket as he steps further into his bedroom. “You didn’t answer, and I heard the shower running.” He pauses, gnawing on his lower lip. He jerks his head towards the bathroom door, “she in there?”

“Who else?”

Jacob laughs, “right…” he hesitates only for a moment before shedding his jacket and tossing it over on John’s bed. “Well if you don’t mind…”

John rolls his eyes, jealousy welling up inside his stomach. This is his brother, his blood, but envy is a nasty thing. 

A competition is a competition though. 

“She’s all yours.” 

Jacob’s quiet when he shuts the bathroom door behind him. He doesn’t make himself known as he lingers for a bit, watching her silhouette through the frosted glass of John’s shower. 

He undresses quickly, toeing off his boots and tossing his shirt within the pile Rook’s already made. His jeans and boxers are torn off just as he slides open the shower and steps inside. 

Before Rook can turn, because now there’s no way she doesn’t know someone’s in here with her, he grabs her hips and tugs her back. Into his chest, pressed fully against his body. He wants her to know it’s him, after all. He wouldn’t put it against John for going for a round two. 

“Jacob!” 

“Mhm?” He leans down to suck her neck, leaving tiny marks that her deputy uniform, which she still wears for whatever reason, won’t hide. 

“The hell are you doing here?”

“Visiting my brother.” 

She hums, though she doesn’t sound convinced. Not like he needs her to believe him. Already she’s rocking back, swaying her hips across his crotch. He’s halfway there, growing harder as she grinds into him. 

He lets out a low growl, the most she’ll ever get from him, and he slams her against the cool tile of the wall. She lets out an undignified squeak that she knows will only egg him on. 

“Jacob!” 

He chuckles softly as he attacks her neck again, kissing down until he reaches the junction of her shoulder. 

“John might hear us.”

He snorts. Is that really the problem? “Honey, he knows what we’re doing. He got his time, now I’m getting mine.” 

She groans as his fingers trail lower to circle her entrance. “You better hurry up,” she snaps, glancing over her shoulder. He stares down at her, and she knows her own gaze isn’t what she wants it to be. It's lust filled and  _ sinful _ . 

“Oh so you’re making demands now?” He thrusts his finger in then, jams it inside her cunt and twists it with a sneer. “That’s cute.” 

She arches her back, squirming away with a gasp.

“Sensitive?” He kisses her full on the lips, swiping his tongue inside. “I’ll be gentle, don’t worry.” 

Rook doesn’t believe him, she doesn’t have a reason to, and that proves true when he guides his throbbing cock to her cunt and pushes in. She’s more than stretched, that’s not the problem, but her walls clench around him anyway.

He plants his hands on her ass cheeks and spreads her, watches as his cock moves fluidly in and out of her pussy. It’s a pretty sight, to have her sheathed on his length, whimpering and clawing at the tiles. 

He picks up a fast pace, slamming in and out of her in a rapid fire way. He knocks her forward, forces her breasts to push against the wall. 

She’s still coming down from her high with John, and so the feeling of pleasure that spikes through her lower belly is no surprise. She tries to give him a warning, her hand comes back to pat at his thigh when her words fail her. 

He only chuckles deeply. “Go on and cum, honey. Let me feel you.” 

She keens high in her throat, her whole body convulsing as he fucks her through her orgasm. It’s almost too much, she thinks for a moment that she’ll pass out, but then he’s shooting off inside her and easing out. 

Jacob catches her when her legs turn to jelly. He laughs, giving her a quick shake before folding her into his arms. The position is enough to make her relax into him, to even toy with the idea of sleeping. 

There’s a sudden temperature change as he exits the bathroom, hefting her further in his arms. 

“Where can I put her?” 

“For fucks sake put some clothes on, Jacob.” 

Jacob laughs, and she feels him shrug. “Where can I put her?” 

Rook flinches when she feels a second set of hands on her body. Running over her shoulders and down her wet back. 

“The guest room down the hall. She needs some sleep.” 

There’s a pause, some momentary glance she knows must be shared between them that she can’t see from how her head is buried within Jacob’s chest. 

It makes her queasy, but then Jacob’s walking away and she doesn’t have time to figure it out. 

*****

Rook isn’t sure whether she should laugh or cry. Probably cry. Considering her current situation, she should be bawling. Breaking down in this shitty cabin in the middle of enemy territory. 

It was the most dangerous time to take a pregnancy test, but she’s trapped as it is, Joseph’s on his way, and she figured she might as well know before she dies. 

Except she hadn’t expected it to come up positive. 

Rook briefly considers sticking her head out the window, yelling to the Peggies who are on guard that she’s got a message for their precious Father, but she has a feeling that she might get her head blown off. Not a great way to end a mission. 

That’s all it was supposed to be. A dry run, so to speak. Simple on paper, when spoken about again and again. Just a trek through Joseph’s island, his fucking compound because he’s powerful enough to have one. The resistance needed intel, any sort of data that could be used against the Seeds. She’s meant to be looking for a weak link in their chained fence, abandoned bunkers that could be used as their own armory. Anything to tip this war in their favor, to catch Joseph off guard. 

Instead she got trapped. And she’s pregnant. 

“Fuck.” 

She leans back heavily against the wall, sliding down until she hits the floor. She draws her knees up and curls her arms around them. Tears sting her eyes and she lets them slip. She’s silent about it, she doesn’t want a single Peggie to think she’s crying over them, at the aspect of meeting the Father and facing retribution. 

Really she’s stupid for thinking this wouldn’t happen. She’s lucky she was able to last as long as she could with how she toyed with John and Jacob. 

Her eyes flutter shut when she hears a car pull up outside. The slam of a door, footsteps which crunch leaves under foot, and a voice she can’t  _ not  _ recognize. 

Joseph Seed. 

She’s shaking when she hears him call for her. He’s outside still, he probably thinks she’ll attack him if he steps inside. She won’t, she can’t actually, she ran out of bullets a while ago. 

She’s not listening to him though, she’s more focused on counting, trying to ebb away a panic attack. It only gets worse when she hears the front door open and click shut. There’s a brief pause as Joseph does a quick scan before walking deeper inside. 

It’s pathetically easy to find her. 

He stops at the threshold of the bathroom door, staring down at her for a heartbeat. She hears his slight intake of breath, sharper than it should be, and she knows she’s been caught. She didn’t exactly hide the test. 

“Deputy…”

“Shut up.” Her voice is muffled from her arms. 

“I didn’t realize you were blessed with such a gift.”

She laughs bitterly, finally uncurling to look at him. Of course he’d see having a child as nothing more than a gift from God. This is the man who killed his own daughter, though, she isn’t taking anything he says to heart. 

Joseph’s quiet, waiting for her to say something maybe, and when she doesn’t, he folds himself down beside her. Careful not to touch her, and she appreciates the gesture. 

“May I ask who the father is?” 

She winces, hands tangling in her hair. “I don’t know.” She sees his eyes widen slightly, he parts his lips and closes them. Unsure. “That makes me sound like a slut, huh?” 

“No, no, no—“

“It does.” She laughs again, turning more fully to face him. “I just…I’m not sure you’ll believe me.”

He moves to sit on his knees, reaching out to grab her wrists and squeeze. “I’m not here to judge you, my child. You can speak to me openly.”

She stares into the depths of his blue eyes and something inside her breaks. She doesn’t want to destroy his family, or even the perception he has of his family. But he’s waiting, and lying would make everything worse down the line. 

Rook knows where she should start though, that decision is easy when flipping between John and Jacob. John’s the one with the troubled past. 

“John and I…” she trails off and watches his lips go thin. “It’s nothing serious, just…”

“Just fooling around?” 

She frowns, recoiling slightly, she never thought of Joseph as vulgar. But it’d be stupid to think of him as pure and oh so pious. She squints at him, shivering as she just now realizes that he’s still holding onto her wrists. He sounds angry, a barely suppressed rage that could maim. 

“Yeah, stress relief I guess.”

Joseph sighs deeply and tightens his grip. “He’s trying. But everyone has their vices...and addictions. He’s trying and you aren’t helping.”

Rook swallows, scared now. “I’m sorry.”

“You aren’t,” he insists. “If you two aren’t anything serious then you shouldn’t be having children! John is a child himself, he can’t watch after someone.” 

Deep down Rook knows Joseph is right, but she feels the need to jump to John’s defense. To tell him off, because John is more than capable. She’s seen so first hand. He knows how to love, he’s learning. 

“He can make his own choices, Joseph.”

He releases her wrists and leans back. Tired looking now. “I never said he couldn’t. I worry about him, though. He’s unpredictable at best. He still hasn’t learned to control his temper. I’ve told him that he needs to stop the path he’s on, to hold back his wrath. I’ve told him that he can’t be so cruel to those he takes the confessions of, but it’s hard to change. He can be dangerous, even I can admit that. I never thought anyone would love him.”

Rook raises her eyebrow. “I never said I loved him.”

“So why didn’t you keep it to sex and only sex?” He reaches out and grabs her shoulders, slamming her back against the wall. “Why did you have to have a baby with him? It takes two people to get pregnant, I can’t fully blame him.” 

She inhales shakily, unsure of how to calm him down. Her hands go to grab his arm, mind spinning. 

“It might not be his.”

Joseph doesn’t say anything. He just stares at her, still mad. 

“I said I didn’t know whose it was.”

“Then, pray tell, who is this other man?”

“Jacob.” 

She’s never seen a man fall apart before, and she hates it. She hates the way his brows scrunch and that he goes slack. She hates that she even started something with his brothers in the first place. 

“Why?” 

She laughs nervously, squirming as if she has room to get away. “They’re hot.”

He lets go of her, shaking his hands out as if she’s dirty. He stands fast and stumbles backward. Slamming against the wall opposite with a huff. 

“Stay here,” he commands her, fingers curling into fists. “I’m giving my men free reign to shoot you if you step outside. And some of them really don’t need anything more than that deputy. You’ve given them more than enough reasons.” 

He gives her one last glance before he’s gone. Storming out and leaving her to start regretting everything she’s ever done that has led up to this point. 

*****

“A DNA test will prove it.” 

Jacob has to hide a smile at John’s words. Even with how much trouble they’re in, he’s still focused on Rook. Giddy with excitement when Joseph called them an hour ago with the news.

_ She’s pregnant.  _

Joseph didn’t sound happy, but that’s Joseph. And at the end of the day he’s only a man, just Jacob’s brother, he can’t do much to stop them now. Though Jacob’s sure he’ll put his two cents in. He always does. 

Jacob gives John a sideways look when his brother smiles at him, and he sighs. Fingers tightening around the wheel as he pulls up next to Joseph’s car. 

He curses softly as he sweeps his eyes over the scene. There’s a whole goddamn army outside, guns pointed at the cabin. Where Rook is. Where her kid is. 

“Fuck this.” 

He’s out and storming across the lawn with a fury in his eyes. John quick on his heels. 

“Joe!” 

Joseph’s standing by the front door, head dipped in thought. When he hears Jacob call out to him he looks up with a frown. 

“Brother.”

“Where is she?” 

For a moment he thinks Joseph is going to argue with him. Demand that they sit down and speak first, but John’s brushing past Joseph before either can react, calling out for Rook. 

Jacob’s the one to stop Joseph from going after his brother. He wraps a strong hand around his wrist and tugs him forward, off the porch and away from the cabin. With a single look he has Joseph sagging, the fight gone because he  _ trusts  _ Jacob. 

It’s easy for John to find Rook inside, she’s sitting on a lone couch, surrounded by trash and overturned furniture. She has her head in her hands, her breathing choppy and uneven. 

He pauses, scared that she’ll push him away. 

She sighs heavily, falling back against the couch. “C’mere, John.” She pats the cushion and snorts at how fast he moves.

“You’re pregnant.” It’s the first thing he says in lieu of a hello. He’s as charismatic as can be, graduated at the top of his class, and yet that’s what he says. It’s why Rook isn’t quite as repulsed as she should be, because he’s... _ him.  _

“I am.” 

He reaches out to hold her, hands going to her hips and straying to her flat stomach. 

Rook’s face falls, she touches his cheek and draws his attention back to her. “It might not be yours, John.”

“I know. Jacob and I knew that going into this. It’s okay. Whether it’s my child or his—we’ll take care of you.” 

“Well…” she laughs, cheeks going pink under his probing gaze, “well I kinda care whose it is.”

“That’s fine, we can check. It won’t change anything between Jacob and I.” 

She smiles at him, fingers curling in his beard as she draws him close. “Let’s say it’s not yours—“

“We’ll do this again. Just me.” 

Her lip twitches. 

“If you’ll let me, of course. I know you didn’t ask for this.” He hand is still lying on her stomach, fingers brushing over her shirt reverently. 

“Is it safe to assume Jacob will do the same thing? Knock me up again?”

Now it’s his turn to be embarrassed. He looks away, but her hand still follows, stays on his cheek. “Yes.”

There’s a pause, she’s been sitting here alone for an hour and she’s had time to think. She can’t get out of this, they wouldn’t let her. With all she’s seen about John and Jacob, she knows for sure that they’re fiercely protective. They’d track her down and chain her up just to keep her and their kid safe. She can’t run. 

And maybe she doesn’t want to. 

“Well,” he murmurs, leaning back in, “is that okay?”

“Yes. Yes, John, it’s perfect.” 


	46. Addicted pt 2

Rook’s sleeping is fitful. And waking is difficult. She isn’t  _ getting up.  _ He shakes her, taps at her cheek, goes as far as yelling at her. Hoping something would break past the wall of unconsciousness that’s shrouded her. Nothing. He doesn’t get a response. She might as well be dead. 

It’s a painful reminder that if they hadn’t found out what she’d be doing with the bliss sooner than she could’ve actually died. 

It takes hours. Literal hours of him poking and prodding until she comes to with a whimper. Hands grasping up at the sheets under her. She’s too out of it to recognize him, perhaps a blessing in disguise, because John’s sure she’d freak out if she woke and the first thing she saw was him. 

She’d probably hit him. 

For now though, she’s lost. The bliss is still in her system, dragging her down and away from them. 

There’s been a few moments when he thinks she’ll be fine. Where her eyes open—even if they are glazed over—and he can spoon soup in her mouth and get her to go to the bathroom. He thinks that they’ve passed the worst of it. But then she lies back down and is dead to the world again. 

This time is no different. 

“John…”

“Leave me be, Jacob.” 

Jacob sighs heavily. Shifting where he’s stood in the doorway. “Give it time. She’ll wake up soon.”

John’s hands clench. He ghosts over her cheek, thumb brushing against smooth skin. Watching for any movement. Hoping for it. 

“We hope, don’t we?”

Jacob steps inside, giving a glance around before stopping at the end of the bed. “We need your help outside. You can’t be here with her all the time—“

“Someone has to. We did this to her.”

Jacob frowns, “we made the bliss, but we didn’t force her to take it.”

John laughs, finally rising away from her motionless form. “Didn’t we? I baptised her in bliss, Faith led her through her bliss fields and you used your bliss coated arrows. She didn’t have a choice.” 

“We’re fixing it,” Jacob murmurs slowly, coming around the bed to place a hand on his shoulder. “It’s slow going and we need your help. We’re all doing our part and there’s still bliss in the valley. If you really want to help her then get your shoes on and help me get rid of the bliss so it’s all gone when she wakes up.” 

John sighs, head dipping. “Fine. Fine, just give me a minute.”

*****

She wakes up and she’s  _ scared.  _ Mostly because she isn’t sure how she got here. Lying in a plush bed with cool air conditioning and a glass of ice water next to her. 

She doesn’t remember as much as she’d like, no matter how hard she tries she can’t grasp it. The memories elude her, but one thing she does hold onto is the trouble she must be in. More specifically, how mad Joseph probably is. She knows what she did, what she’d been doing. Doping up on the bliss in the hopes that no one would notice, getting so high that she had the audacity to charge the Father. 

She doesn’t remember being placed in bed, dressed in clothes that aren’t hers. Nor does she remember falling asleep—though that easily could be the bliss. The thought makes her groan out of frustration. She hadn’t expected this to end well, but like this? This is worse than she would’ve guessed. 

Her head rolls around, going slow, afraid that she’s hurt. When she doesn’t encounter any pain she gets more sharp with her movements. Until she realizes that she’s handcuffed. Not  _ to  _ anything. Not laced up to the bedpost like an animal. Her hands are only shackled together, limiting her movement but not trapping her. 

It makes her think that maybe she’s not a prisoner. 

“Hello?” Her voice doesn’t work the first time. Too dry. Without thought—her head’s spinning—she grabs the glass on the table beside her and down half of it. Choking herself. With water running down her chin she tries again. “Hello? Joseph? John?” 

Her throat clicks with the next swallow and she finishes off the rest of the water. Thankful for whoever left it. And deep within herself she knows who did. Even as blissed up as she was she remembers riding in the backseat of Joseph’s car, him trying to hold her down as she thrashed, trying to tear his throat out. 

She’s in Peggie territory. 

“Joseph! John! Anyone there?!” 

She shifts her body close to the edge of the bed, letting her feet slip to the wood floor. She cringes at how cold it is, and it’s then that she realizes that someone took her shoes and socks. Hell, she doesn't even have any panties on. No bra either. 

Rook cringes at the thought of someone undressing her. Caring for her like she’s a child. It makes her stomach flop, wounds her pride. 

There’s no sound after her initial calls. Nothing to indicate that someone hears her screams. 

Her fingers ball into fists. As much as they can while she’s handcuffed. With an angry huff she stands, finding out too late that she’s not ready. She gets dizzy instantly, almost falling back. She holds strong though, grits her teeth and stands the best she can. Knees slightly bent.

“Rook?” 

The sound of Joseph’s voice puts her on edge immediately. He doesn’t seem mad, only slightly tired, but she’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. For him to yell at her, to finally strike out against her as retaliation for hitting him when he found her in the bliss. 

He doesn’t do any of that. Simply stares at her, maybe not really believing that she’s up and alive. He certainly doesn’t look convinced. 

“You’re awake.” He says when she doesn’t greet him. “We were beginning to think you wouldn’t come back to us. That the bliss had taken you.” His voice cracks, sorrow ruining the strong lilt she’s come to associate with the Father. 

There’s hundreds of things running through her head. So many things she wants to know. Instead she settles on, “how long?” That seems the most important somehow. 

“Almost a month.” 

At her sound of disbelief he steps forward, closing the door behind him. “It’s okay,” he tells her, stepping closer until he can reach out and guide her back down on the bed. “We’ve been watching out for you.” 

She doesn’t ask what that means, she gets the gist. They’ve bathed her and clothed her, they’ve fed her and made sure she didn’t die. 

“Why?” 

He reaches into his pocket instead of answering, turning his wrists over in her hand before unlocking the handcuffs keeping her bound. 

He rubs her skin, a frown on his lips. Trying to answer her question. “It was my family’s fault that you fell ill. The bliss isn’t supposed to do what it did…” he looks deep into her eyes and she sees an impossible sadness in them. “I suppose it’s been changing people for years now. Hurting them and ruining them. I just haven’t seen it. Or...or I was in denial. But then I saw you—our salvation—completely gone and destroyed by the bliss and it hit me.” 

Joseph squeezes her hands, “I was wrong. And my family is trying to amend our actions.” 

Rook doesn’t mean to, but she still feels groggy, and so she laughs. “By taking care of me?” 

“No,” he lets go of her, “we’re working on the bliss.” He swallows, Adam’s apple bobbing, “we’re getting rid of it.” 

She’s immediately suspicious. She tells him so. 

“I understand, Rook. That’s okay. You’re still not right—“ he reaches out and taps her skull, “up here. It’ll take time. Soon you’ll be back outside on your feet and you’ll see that we’re telling the truth.” 

She wants to fight him. But she’s weak, she feels how close she is to falling back into bed and giving in. She’s not fully recuperated. She needs their help.

“Do you need the bathroom?” He asks softly, standing and easing his weight off the bed. Changing the subject. 

“Yes. Please.” 

She doesn’t want his help, his mere touch is enough to make her cringe. At the same time though it’s oddly comforting, the caress of something gentle that she hardly gets. It’s Joseph Seed and she shouldn’t be leaning into him as he helps her over to the bathroom, but she does. She can’t help it. 

He lets her sit on the closed toilet lid, a hand stroking her cheek before falling away. He can see how tired she is, just by taking a few steps. How’d she manage to stay alive for so long? 

“Who did this?” She murmurs, “who helped me around if I can barely walk?” 

“John, mostly. He is very invested in your health.” 

She snorts, not surprised. John’s future depends on her. He can’t walk through Eden if she’s dead. 

He shifts on his feet, hands hanging limp at his side. “Do you need help?” 

She shakes her head, embarrassment turning her cheeks pink at the prospect of him watching. Though she has a feeling that he’s seen a lot of her. 

Rook’s about to refuse, chapped lips peeling apart to speak, but the longer she’s awake the more tired she becomes. 

Joseph notices instantly. He kneels beside her and cups her jaw. 

“What’s wrong with me? What did you do?” 

“It’s the bliss. Too much of it over an extended period of time…” he trails off, leaving the rest to her imagination. She gets the message. She’ll be out of commission for a while. That’s why she doesn’t remember the last couple of weeks of them taking care of her. 

“Let me help, darling.” 

Joseph has to do most of the work just to help her use the bathroom. He accepts the heft of her weight when she stands, he tugs down the pants that aren’t hers and she belatedly realizes once again that she isn’t wearing panties. 

She floating though, drifting in her own mind, too far gone for her to care. He sits her back on the toilet and steps back, aware of the way she’s bowing her head. Hiding the best she can as she tries to pee. There’s the pain of stage fright but then she lets go and says fuck it. 

What more is there to lose? He’s seen every part of her.

Rook’s fingers can’t close properly, but she manages to wipe herself. He has to help her stand again, and he pulls up her pants, hugging her close. 

“How about a bath?” 

She considers it, blinks blearily and draws back to stare at him. He sighs, her eyes are glazed over, but she’s more aware than she had been in the past month. 

“A bath it is then,” he mumbles. And he knows that she’s still swimming in the bliss when she lets him undress her and put her in the tub. He turns on the spigot and watches the water fill. Anger at himself welling up in his chest before he kneels down and busies himself at the task at hand. 

He prays that this time she’ll stay away. That this time her eyes open and they stay open. That she’ll remember this and start to actually get better. 

*****

“If she woke up you should have told us.”

John’s stroking her hair. Messaging her temples carefully despite the fact that he reeks of bliss. 

“Get away from her,” Joseph says again. Repeats it louder as if that will stop John. 

“But she’s awake—“

“John!” 

It’s true. Joseph had been surprised himself when he guided her out of the tub and she hadn’t slipped farther into unconsciousness. Sometimes she knew where she was, sometimes she didn’t. But she’s awake.

“You smell of bliss, John.”

“Jacob and I were cleaning it up. Of course I do.”

Joseph sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “John she’s recovering.”

John just gives a shrug. Reaching with his other hand to squeeze hers. A ghost of a smile appearing when she squeezes back. 

“Yes,” he says matter of factly, not moving away. “Yes she is.” 


	47. Hunted

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook has struck a nerve with Jacob, she poked him further than she should’ve. Prompting him to hunt down personally. Right into John's region. Little brother does not like that one bit.

She humiliated him. Made him look weak, like he’s unfit for the rage of war that Hope county so valiantly offers. In front of his men no less, to the whole of the mountains through a haphazardly executed broadcast. It worked, got the job done. 

She never thought it’d be possible to take down Jacob, he had always seemed so untouchable. But back there, she had the element of surprise. Weeks spent learning his schedule paid off when she took him to the ground. 

Rook was trained by him, she knew how to fight pretty damn well. His wolves went down easy, without her even needing to reveal herself. The two men by his side were next. One with an arrow through his heart—her last one because she never much cared for using a bow—the other with a knife plunged through his throat when she finally stepped out of cover. 

She was all too aware that this was being recorded, everything in the mountains was between Eli’s cameras and Jacobs. She might make a fool out of herself and that would defeat the purpose of this. 

Rook knew that her side was losing, that the Miltia’s morale was low and they felt like everything was hopeless. That things would be so much easier if they just gave in. 

There was nothing she wanted more than to change that. To show people that the Seeds aren’t made of teflon, they can bleed like men; they can die like men. They’re human despite how monstrous they act. 

She needed to win that fight though. 

And she did. She charged him and sidestepped when he inevitably aimed low. He liked to do that to her—he’d done it before when she mouthed off to him the last time she had been in his loving care. He yanked her out of her cage and forced her to fight him. Each and every time he used her own body against her. Taking her legs out from under her and pinning her. 

She knew that if he got her on the ground then the fight would be over. 

The small blade in her hand acted as a distraction, she jabbed at his stomach and when he inevitably dodged that, she grabbed the machete on her back and slashed his skin open. 

She’d been aiming for his stomach, but he turned at the last minute, shielding his organs, making her catch his back instead. Not like it mattered, he was bleeding. That was what she wanted. 

“You’ve got a lot of nerve, deputy.” 

He wasn’t breathing heavy, wasn’t flustered like she was. He was calm, looking like he already won. 

“Could say the same to you.” She cocked her head, fingers tightening around both of her blades. “What are you doing out here? I thought you never left your fortress.”

“I’m looking for something.”

Rook knew what he was doing. Despite how they were circling each other she saw how he was steadily getting closer. Ready to pounce on her. He was making her ask questions, getting her to talk in the hopes of distracting her. 

She didn’t take the bait, instead she closed the gap between them before he had the chance. Her blade swung up, near his head, and he grabbed her wrist before it could make contact. She could feel him twist her hand, ready to toss her to the ground, but she was faster. Smarter maybe.

She yanked him forward and threw him off balance, following the motion he expected to throw her in. But instead of him getting her down, she sank her teeth into the flesh of his forearm. 

He gasped and jerked his arm back, and she let him. If she hadn't she knew it’d only be a matter of him knocking his fist against her temple to shake her loose. 

“Christ, honey—“ 

She charged him again, circled around and huddled in close to hop on his back. He did what she hoped, he took her weight. Braced his knees like he taught himself and stood when he probably should’ve dropped and crushed her beneath him. 

It gave her time to stab him with her small dagger. In his shoulder and around to his front. Hitting his sternum and chest, collecting blood and making him seethe. 

It wouldn’t kill him, she was sure a knife as small as she was using wouldn’t do a damn thing to any man. That wasn’t the point of this mission. 

Rook had hoped that she would be able to incapacitate him. Her plan had been working so flawlessly that she figured she won, that she was doing her job exactly how she was meant to. That it would only be a matter of time until she reached into her pocket for the vial bliss she kept handy and left him disoriented. 

But then he reached up and grabbed her by the back of her shirt. She was thrown far, further than she would’ve thought possible. It was only luck that she rolled until her body hit the gentle slope of dirt and she kept on rolling. 

It got her away from Jacob for the time being, and stupidly she thought that would be the end of it. That they’d run back to their respective holes. She would be more of a hero than she already was, she’d give the people hope and Jacob would give some speeches on strength or some shit. 

Except that wasn’t at all what happened. She hurt Jacob’s pride. A sin she didn’t even know he carried was starting to show. 

Because now she’s running as fast as she ever has. Zipping through trees and rocks, trying to lose him in the natural maze of the forest. 

Before, when they were fighting in such close quarters, Jacob didn’t have the chance to use his gun. Now though, he isn’t taking any chances. 

He’s aiming to take her down, to cripple her, not kill. And she can’t imagine the kind of punishment he’s already thinking about. 

He isn’t calling out to her, he isn’t toying with his prey. This isn’t a game anymore, he’s pissed. 

She’s never seen Jacob angry. He’s always had this cool collected quiet anger that seethed below the surface only because he knows how to control his rage and turn it into something useful. That’s what makes him so scary, so unlike John. 

It’s his temper that makes him sloppy, that mixed with pure luck that she manages to make it to the edge of Jacob’s region where she sees the shiny words of the Baptist’s phrase hanging up along the bridge connecting Holland Valley and the mountains.

She knows the rules, whether it’s some unspoken tryst between the family isn’t any of her business, but she knows that Jacob won’t follow her. They don’t cross into each other's regions. It’s easy to piss one of them off and high tail it somewhere else. She’s done it before. 

She’s safe, and with that thought she lets a half crazed laugh bubble up out of her chest. She doesn’t bother grappling for her radio, there’s no need to call for help. 

Jacob will retreat and John will be given word that his favorite deputy is back in town. 

Except he doesn’t do that at all. She slows for a moment, just a mere second, and a bullet finds its home in her shoulder. 

Rook screams but she doesn’t go down. She can’t—he’ll drag her back with a fist tangled in her hair. He’ll put her through hell like she’s never known it. On that front, she’d rather deal with John. For all that he does, she can make it stop. If she can’t handle the knives and all the pain he brings with confession, she could say yes and he’d stop in a heartbeat. 

Jacob is different. He doesn’t want you to stop, you can’t make him stop unless you give up and at that point you’re already dead. That’s after all the starvation and brainwashing. With John she can keep her sanity. 

It’s harder to dodge Jacob in the Valley. There’s not enough trees and plains that stretch on for miles. And with that thought coming and gone, she realizes that she’s in the middle of a field. Running straight on and stumbling over herself. She hears Jacob approaching her, his heavy breathing and pounding footsteps that are getting closer and closer and—

He brings her to the ground easily. Throwing his weight on hers and crushing her beneath him. She’s on her stomach, swallowing dirt and being blinded by dust. 

She flails and screams, stopping only when Jacob presses a sharp blade to her throat. 

“Quiet.”

He smashes her underneath him, powerful thighs crushing her rib cage to stop her squirming. His other hand comes to the back of her neck and holds her there roughly, threatening to kill if she doesn’t listen. 

“You’re such a fucking pain, deputy, you know that?” 

She squeaks out something unintelligible, still eating dirt, when the radio by his hip goes off. 

“Brother, you’re not too subtle, are you?”

It’s distinctly John’s voice. It’s hard not to recognize, and right now, it’s the best thing in the world. It’s a distraction, keeps some focus off her, however small that may be. 

“What ever happened to not crossing region lines? Did I miss the last meeting?” 

Jacob huffs atop her, shifting to grab at his radio and leaving the back of her neck for the time being. He sits back on her thighs, the knife going too. 

“This was a special case.” 

“Oh I very much doubt that.” John sounds amused, that’s the first thing just about anyone would pick up on. But she knows John, she’s spent time with this man trapped in a bunker worrying for her life. 

She hears the anger there. The threats waiting to come spilling out. 

“Should I send my men over to collect her?” 

Jacob doesn’t answer, instead he cranes his neck around the open field they're in and frowns. “How the fuck did you know I was even here?” 

John laughs, “I can’t exactly tell you, that’s classified information and you have our deputy trapped beneath you.” There’s a brief pause and Rook takes the moment to lift her head gingerly off the ground to breathe fresh air. 

Jacob allows it, thank god, more focused on his brother. 

“Come visit me, Jacob, for old times sake. We can talk about this.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” As if to prove his point Jacob stands and pulls Rook with him, the knife is sheathed on his thigh but his hand returns to her collar, dragging her along with him. Back towards the mountains. 

A whimper escapes her lips and she digs her heels in. He only tugs harder, and she knows that if she falls he’d keep on tugging her along, he’d choke her until she put her feet under her. 

“I don’t mind setting up a blockade, Jacob. You’re overstepping your bounds, leave Rook to run away and go back home.” 

Jacob flicks off his radio and jams it back on his hip, snarling at her when she stumbles and nearly face plants. 

Her hands scramble to tug at his wrist, her nails scratching at his skin but doing nothing to slow him down. He stops and she slams into him. 

“I can make this very unpleasant for you, we both know that. Now are you going to walk or am I going to fucking make you?” 

She glances around, eyes going wild to search for some kind of life—for help— as she babbles. Finally finding her words. “I’ll walk.” 

“Good. Keep up.” 

She didn’t run as far as she thought, which is slightly disheartening considering the kind of reputation she has. She thought she was at least fast, if not strong. It makes her wonder why so many people have put their hope in her. 

The bridge she crossed appears in the distance and when she squints…

“That asshole, that little bratty son of a bitch—“ Jacob shoves her down, puts pressure on her throat until she’s forced to follow his movement and kneel. 

She very much likes her head where it is on her shoulders so she doesn’t run, just watches Jacob pace before he turns his radio back on and brings it up to his lips. 

“You’re such a bitch, you know that, John?”

Ah, okay, there is it. The Jacob she always figured had to exist. The big brother in him that pokes and jabs at John until he’s red in the face. 

“On the contrary, brother. You're being unreasonable. How am I supposed to act?” Jacob opens his mouth to counter that, but John’s speaking again almost immediately. “She’s our family’s to share, but right now, in this Valley—my Valley—she is no one else’s but my own.”

Rook raises an eyebrow at that, ducking her head when Jacob looks at her. She hides her hopeful smile, knowing full well that John has his own brand of crazy. That he isn’t contained by Joseph right now. He’ll do just about anything. He’s always been unpredictable. 

Even Jacob has to realize that he’s stepping on some toes.

“Besides, Jacob, can’t you wait to run her ragged again? Give me time to at least wash her of the smell of blood and wolves. Why do you need her  _ now _ ?”

“She needs to be taught a lesson.” 

Across the way Rook just barely makes out the blurry shape of a man stepping out of a truck, he’s got something curled tight around his fist and his hand on his hip. It’s easy to tell it’s John just by how the Peggies around him scatter into position with a flick of his wrist. 

From so far away she shouldn’t be able to feel the hatred emanating from him, but she does, John has that kind of effect. 

“You’re alone in my region, Jacob. Don’t make any mistakes about where my loyalties lie, but I won’t hesitate telling my men to open fire.”

She hears Jacob’s sharp breath. His laugh that follows which sounds shaky at best. “You wouldn’t.”

“I most definitely would. Try me.” 

Jacob glances her way once more before stalking over and grabbing her, a hand curling around the front of her shirt as he pulls her near. Close enough for her to smell the death that clings to him like a second skin. 

He takes a steadying breath before responding, never breaking eye contact. “Joseph would be mad.”

“Joseph would get over it. He always forgives me.” John sounds so sure of himself, a lawyer once more, even when threatening his brother. “Well, what's it going to be?” 

Rook is holding her breath, eyes flickering across Jacobs' face. Trying to read him. Her hands are still limp by her side, clenching uselessly. Considering if she’d be able to add to John’s words, if she could help push this along and get out of this alive. 

Jacob glares at her, his grip loosening on her shirt before going to her neck. He’s quiet as his hand gets tight around her throat and he shakes her. 

There are black spots appearing at the corners of her vision, tiny blips of darkness that threaten to pull her under and leave her at his mercy.

“Let her go, Jacob.”

He does so immediately. He shoves her backward and watches her fall on her ass. No longer the strong and confident deputy. Instead she’s shaking, her whole body trembling as she catches her breath.

He stares down at her for a while, considering her. Considering what he’s going to do to her the next time she steps foot in his region.

“For your sake, I hope my brother keeps you for a long time, deputy.”

Rook doesn’t watch him leave, she lets the muscles in her neck go loose as she falls back against the grass. She doesn’t have the energy to fight when John comes for her. Blocking out the sun with a gentle sigh escaping his lips. 

She peaks an eye open to look at him. There’s a beautiful sheen of light that surrounds him and it makes him look angelic. Especially with the smile he’s wearing. 

He screams danger—it’s instinct by now—but she doesn’t move when he crouches beside her and strokes the sweaty hair away from her face. 

“Don’t worry, Rook, you’re safe now. You’re with me.” 

Out of the corner of her eye she sees him give a slight nod, and she realizes that he didn’t make the trek across the field alone. There’s a man standing ten feet away, a gun trained on her. 

She lets a whimper escape her and she shuffles up on her elbows only to be met with John grabbing her and pulling her into his chest. 

“Relax, my dear. I’ve got you.” 

The bullet hits her shoulder, the same one that Jacob had, and a fresh burst of pain follows with it. It takes only a few seconds for everything to go sparkly around the edges of her vision, and she lets out a strained laugh. 

Fucking bliss bullets. 

*****

There’s a coolness washing across her skin that coincides with the darkness. For the moment the world is cool, calming even. She settles back as much as she can, wherever she is, and is met with soft laugh that comes from somewhere too close. 

She shouldn’t be this okay with this strange floating sensation, and deep down she knows it’s the bliss that’s keeping her under, not allowing her to panic. It takes her a couple tries to pry open her eyes, to even move her fingers and toes. Long enough that she begins to worry that she’s been paralyzed. Or maybe that she’s dead. 

The first thing she sees is brightness. The light of fluorescents that makes her flinch back. Her elbow hits cool tile—fucking ow—and she tips her head around to look. To figure out where she is only to have a hand wrap loosely around the nape of her neck. 

Then she notices the water. It’s up to her collarbone, lapping at her cheek from how quickly she moved, from how she tilted her head. The one thing stopping her from drowning being the hand holding her up. 

“Calm down, you’ll hurt yourself.” 

The voice is too close, too familiar and all around her. Overwhelming her senses until she feels the need to scream. 

“You’re safe, Rook. Open your eyes, look. You’re okay.” 

There are tears blurring her vision, really everything is very bright and it  _ hurts _ , but she finally sees past the wetness and realizes she’s in a bathtub. 

A very large bathtub. One big enough to fit three people if you wanted. 

Her hands press down on the bottom of the tub, fingers curling as she finds some reserve of strength inside her to push up and stop herself from drowning. 

Water sloshes over the edge, drawing her eyes to the end of the tub, where the spout is dripping water, and she sees a cocked knee that doesn’t belong to her. 

She tenses, just now aware of the press of bare flesh behind her, cradling her body carefully. He must feel all her muscles go tight, because an arm is suddenly around her, pressing between her breasts and drawing her back into him. She feels his beard scratch at her neck and she wants to scream out. 

John. She’s with John Seed. Naked. The both of them are very naked. 

“What are you doing?” Her voice is hoarse when she uses it, sending her into a coughing fit. His other hand strokes her back through it, waiting for her to quiet down. 

“I’m taking care of you. My brother Jacob doesn’t treat you right, it drives me mad.” His legs go tight around her hips, locking her into place. “Everytime you’re over there I worry about you. Do you ever think about how I feel? That I have to wonder if I you’ll come down from those mountains, if I’ll ever see you again?” 

Rook isn’t sure what to say, the bliss is still going strong, making her tongue heavy. She squirms in his grasp, freezing when she feels the weight of something hard between his legs. 

He sighs but doesn’t move, if anything he holds her tighter. “I’m not letting my brother destroy the one good thing I have in my life. It’s been years...don’t I deserve to be happy? After all I’ve done for Eden’s Gate, where’s my reward, what’s the end goal if not someone I can love?”

“You can’t keep me here, someone will come looking for me.” 

“I know. Your friends are quite a persistent bunch.” He laughs breathily, like he’s just told a wonderful joke. “But you’ll come around eventually, you’ll see that I’m only trying to help you. See? I’m keeping you clean right now, and afterwards I’ll feed you and give you water—Jacob never does that.” 

He pushes at her back until she sits up and he can stand. Her shoulders instinctively hunch over, unwilling to look up as he gets out and dries himself off. 

He doesn’t bother wrapping a towel around his waist, he fluffs his hair and tosses it on the floor, going to reach for her. 

Rook protests with a hand shoving out at his bare chest, but he’s so much stronger. He drags her until they’re chest to chest and her breasts get smashed between them. He seems to revel in the contact. Laughing when his cock drags against her thigh and she shivers. 

The trek out of the bathroom reveals just where she is, and even if she had a hunch she really had hoped that it wasn’t true. But she’s deep in Peggie territory, standing in John’s bedroom and soon lying in his bed as he tucks strands of hair behind her ear. 

“You’ll want for nothing, my dear, I promise. For now, rest a little while, I’ll prepare dinner.” 

She trembles as he turns away, rifling through his drawers only to pull out a soft robe that he ties loosely at his waist. 

When he catches her watching him he smiles, a soft chuckle falling from his lips before he walks out of the room. The lock clicks shut behind him, trapping her inside for good. She’s exhausted, beyond tired. The kind of tired she only thought came from being with Jacob, locked in a cage and deprived of everything. 

The thought of him makes her shudder, has her pressing her naked body deeper into John’s blankets.

He speaks to her like a crazy man, obsessed is probably the right word, but she’s somewhat safe. She isn't one for playing along, but maybe just until she can get back on her feet she can do this. She can do as John asks and learn to navigate this minefield if it means prolonging the inevitable encounter with Jacob. 

Anyone can see how much John longs for love, to be loved and held and told he’s worth it. A man like that is easily manipulated, she’d give it a week before she has him wrapped around her finger and dancing to her tune. She sighs, curling up and listening to John fiddle around downstairs with pots and pans. John will take care of her, he’ll keep Jacob far away, and right now that’s all that matters. 


	48. Unbeknownst To Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook is starting to think she might have to kill them just to get their attention.
> 
> Her and Kenway both discussed at length that they’d be doing nothing of the sort, that they would walk through the inevitable hellfire coming their way if it meant the Seeds would make it out alive. She’s just about reached her limit though.
> 
> (Or: the Seeds are ignoring Rook and she can’t quite figure out why)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had this posted as its on separate work because I thought it was too long but after some thought I decided that I'd rather have it posted here :)

Rook is starting to think she might have to kill them just to get their attention. 

Her and Kenway both discussed at length that they’d be doing nothing of the sort, that they would walk through the inevitable hellfire coming their way if it meant the Seeds would make it out alive. All four of them, the whole damn family, no matter how many people wanted to see them strung up and maimed for what they’ve done.

She’s just about reached her limit though. It’s not like her and Kenway look alike, he’s a good foot taller with hair three shades lighter than her own. Not to mention his eyes, dazzling blues to counteract her brown ones. He talks and walks differently. So why is she being blatantly ignored? Why is she being tossed to the side like trash, like she isn’t important, like she isn’t pouring her heart and soul into saving Hope county? 

Most importantly, their approach to liberating Hope is different. 

Has been from the very beginning when they were the only two to slip past the Seeds and evade capture. They liberated Dutch’s island together and took the veteran’s word on heading out to Fall’s End, but that’s all they wanted to keep it to. They figured that going their separate ways would benefit them in the long run. Kenway had said something about wanting to divide and conquer. They’d stay in the same region, sure, but they didn’t plan together. She took one side of Holland Valley and he’d take the other, and if everything went to plan they’d meet in the middle to save John from himself. 

It was all going fine until she realized that it _wasn’t._ It had to be after Fall’s End—though the actual liberation of the town went swimmingly. They were doing so much good. She noticed how...strangely absent John was once they split up, when she went to do her own thing. To cause mass destruction and maybe save a few civilians along the way because she’s a cop and that’s what she signed up for. 

She’s not too sure where to pin the blame, but she distinctly remembers Jerome asking them to help an Eden’s Gate defector—and that’s where things went screwy. 

Saving the man went off without a hitch. She snuck through a beat up trailer park, killed people that she wished she didn’t have to, and dumped the defector onto a waiting boat. Kenway had her back and it was like they were old friends, soldiers in arms ready to die for each other. As if they hadn’t only met the day of the arrest when she walked into his precinct running on little sleep and he jammed a cup of coffee in her hand, joking about the tyrant of a marshal they were sent.

Not even an hour later Jerome called again. Just a mile down the road from the docks was a family being held hostage in their own home. Held at gunpoint with the word ‘gluttony’ spray painted on the sign coming up their drive. They ran a damn pig farm and she hardly thinks supplying the county with meat can count as gluttony. And even if they weren’t, even if those were their own pigs, well who the hell was John to think that was a sin.’

She pushed aside her qualms and saved those people too. In her mind they were still winning, _she_ was winning. Not that John thought so. 

Really she should have known something was up when she walked away from the carnage they wrought and there was nothing but radio silence. She’s heard how angry John can get, how prone he is to flying off the handle. That he would absolutely jump on the chance to rave about sin and atonement. 

She didn’t think much of it until later that night when she was nursing a beer at the bar while Mary May cleaned glasses and kept quiet save for the tiny radio by her side. That’s around the time Kenway walked through the door all red in the face. 

He wasn’t hurt, just angry. Brows tilted down low and hair tossed around like he’d been running his hands through it. 

She opened her mouth to speak but Mary May beat her to it. “You alright there, deputy?” 

“Fine.” But from the way he said it he was anything but. She knew that, she’s sure Mary May knew it too. Which is probably why the woman only raised her eyebrow. 

“I’ve got vodka in the back.” 

Kenway sighed but nodded curtly. 

When she left he finally turned his eyes to her. 

“I got a call from John Seed himself.” He laughed bitterly, “crazy bastard.”

“What’d he say?”

“Something about Jerome being misguided and wrong, that he’s full of sin. That I am too, cause I helped him.” Kenway took a seat beside her, head resting on his hand. “I wouldn’t be surprised if he comes for us in the next few days.” 

Rook bobbed her head in a slow nod, “sounds like he’s interested in you.” Her lips curled into a smile—all those weeks ago it was a joke, she wasn’t angry because she’s sure they’d notice her soon enough. That she’d get her fill of heated speeches. So right then, she laughed about it. 

“He didn’t call you?” 

She sipped her beer and shook her head. Humming around a mouthful. 

“That’s bullshit, you were there!” 

She shrugged and stood just as Mary May entered. Patting his shoulder with faux sympathy sparkling in her eyes. “Yeah, I was. Maybe he's just got a thing for you.”

That was a month ago.

A month of being ignored, being treated as if she isn’t worth a damn. It’s driving her crazy. That's what led to this. To her standing in front of John’s ugly sign on the cusp of the mountains, ready to blow the thing to pieces. 

It takes more than a couple of hits for it to go down completely, for the white shards that once spelled his favorite word to tumble down the mountain. She belatedly realizes that she should’ve made sure no one was down below, but she can’t bring herself to care past her rage. 

Wrath. 

That’s what John would peg her sin as if he would only give her the time of day. 

“Rook.” Her radio crackles and she’s only mildly disappointed that it’s Kenway—she hasn’t heard from him all day and knowing he’s safe makes her heart just a tad lighter. “What did you do?” 

“Blew up John’s ‘yes’ sign.” 

He makes a disgruntled noise that doesn’t quite sound like disappointment. “He called me.” 

“He—“ she falls back into the grass, ignoring the pain that lances through her tailbone at the shock. “He called you...John….called you.”

“Yep.” 

She sucks on her teeth, all that wrath leaving her body in one fell swoop. She collapses on her back and stares up at the sky. 

“I think I’m going to head East,” she murmurs after some thought. “Check out Faith’s deal.” 

Kenway doesn’t object—splitting up had always been the plan. So she leaves right after their call ends and she finds a car abandoned on the side of the road. She vaguely remembers the post-it notes strung up in Dutch’s bunker, remembers how he labeled Faith as a master manipulator, how she’s dangerous only because she seems like the exact opposite. 

Which is a nice change from John. In order to manipulate someone you have to _talk_ to them. You have to stare them in the eyes and twist their mind. 

She’s kind of looking forward to it. 

Rook doesn’t waste time, she doesn’t see the need to. Even if she knows that there’s got to be someone that needs her help in the Henbane. She sees a barrel of overturned bliss and she parks the car to wander over. 

She’ll deal with people later. She wants to meet Faith. 

The trip is...strange. Different than she thought it’d be. There are sparkles floating around the edges of her vision and everything feels so much lighter. Like she’s walking on clouds. She stumbles and falls, scrapes her knees a couple of times and the illusion wavers before the world refocuses and all she can see in beautiful endless fields that makes her want to frolic. 

She’s not sure how long that image lasts, but suddenly she blinks and she’s knee deep in water. Bliss tainted water, though it’s not nearly as strong as the barrels had been. Her head slowly cranes up and she has to hide the gentle gasp that falls from her lips unbidden. 

It’s the statue—the one of Joseph Seed that you can see no matter where you are in Hope County. The one they’d flown past on the night of the arrest when she made some asinine comment everyone had ignored. 

It seems bigger, though that may be the lingering effects of the bliss. Her eyes trail down the length of it and—

Oh. Oh she’s closer than she thought. Close enough to be able to see the faces of those guarding the damn thing. Her fish instinct is the drop down, but she shifts her knees and the water splashes around her louder than she’d like. No one looks, not yet, but as she gets out someone loosely turns their head just to stretch. She freezes, trying to blink away the hazy streaks obscuring her vision. 

Her eyes meet the guard’s and she waits, tense all over. And nothing comes. No alarms raised, no shouts or gunfire. Her lip twitches down. She must still be in bliss, and she’ll have to give credit where credit is due, the stuff makes everything look so real. 

Rook, with somewhat of a newfound confidence even in her drug addled mind, strolls away from the pond and walks right up to the statue. She lays her hand on it and feels the warmth that it gives off. It’s hard to believe it’s all fake. She makes a mental note to send a text to Kenway later, just to let him know how dangerous this stuff can be. 

She circles the giant monolith, fingers trailing along until she reaches an opening. Two bliss people are guarding it, chatting idly among themselves, and she all but skips by them. It’s a long way up once inside, her fingers keep slipping on the ladder, kind of numb and tingly. She gets the flow of it eventually and by the time she reaches the top the bliss doesn’t feel as prevalent inside her. 

Rook turns real slow, does a nice circle before a laugh tumbles free. It’s a book standing up on a podium. Looking all in the world like a trap set in a movie. But she picks it up and nothing happens. She weighs it in her hands and peels back the cover. It’s Joseph’s bible, his very own book. This one’s different though, there are notes in the margin. Lines have been highlighted and underlined in varying colors. 

It _looks_ like a girl’s handwriting, sort of reminds her of high school, and she knows instantly without a doubt in a way she can’t explain that this is Faith’s personal copy of the Book of Joseph. Maybe the very first one. 

Which means it must be important. She considers destroying it, shooting through the perfectly embossed cover to ruin the words inside. But that’s more Kenway’s deal. Blowing up silos and taking crack shots at passing vans just because he can. Besides, this right here—destroying this book—it’s as close to symbolism you can get. She pockets it instead, shoves it deep within her bag and wonders if she’ll get to keep it when this bliss dream is over. 

She hopes so. She wants her and Kenway to film a video, a mockery of when the Seeds did the exact same thing with their friends. She wants to make it public knowledge that Faith’s hold on the Henben is slipping. They’ll give some long drawn out speech, Kenway has always said she’s good with words, and then they’ll probably burn it.

She likes that idea. Sounds attention catching. 

Rook toys with the thought of going back down but ultimately finds a way outside, onto the large book the statue is holding, and she decides its the best view of Hope that’s available. She doesn’t sit though, instead she stands right on the edge and peers over. It’s a long way down, if she were to jump she’d land below a cliff. 

She squints slightly, eyes narrowing. It’s hard to see from so far away but she thinks there’s a white target on the ground. And those lumps she can’t make out are either rocks or bodies. 

Rook gets a sudden rush of vertigo and closes her eyes. She grips her bag tighter around her shoulders and reminds herself that this isn’t real. That maybe taking this leap would be the exact thing that makes Faith realize there’s a deputy in her land. 

With a deep breath and a quick reminder that she won’t die, she steps off and falls and everything goes black. 

This time when she wakes up there’s no sparkles, no remnants of green dust trailing around her. Her head doesn’t feel fuzzy and the blood is flowing freely through her limbs once more. She’s alive and she’s right where she was before she got knocked out. At the bottom of the cliff with the statue of Joseph looming above her and blotting out the sun. 

She tips her head around carefully and nearly screams. She’s seen dead bodies, she’s killed Peggies for the past month, but having one that close to her in such a state of decay? It makes her scramble back until she’s up and running. 

It takes only a day for her to realize how much she hates the bliss. It takes another day for Faith to radio Kenway in near hesterics, saying that Joseph will be so angry that he stole his book, the one she was meant to cherish and protect. 

“Did you tell her you weren’t in the Henbane?” 

He snorts, the crackle of the radio distorting it. “Of course, she didn’t believe me though. I think…” he tapers off, making a sound low in his throat in substitution of words. 

“You think what?” She reclines back against the bark of a tree, waiting for him to respond. It’s early in the morning and she just woke up, she hadn’t decided what she’s going to do today and this interaction between Faith and Kenway is taking up all her mental space.

“I think she said something she wasn’t supposed to.” 

Her eyes narrow, “what do you mean?” Then, because wrath is very close to her heart, “stop beating around the bush, c’mon, I’m not in the mood.” 

He sighs, heavily and drawn out. It’s a blessing he hadn’t abandoned her by now because she knows she must annoy him sometimes. 

“She said that this isn’t the first time I’ve done something like this...been somewhere I couldn’t have possibly been.” Rook hears Kenway shift, hears him curse before he continues. “She said that her and John have been talking, that they’ve been sharing fucking notes or whatever.” Despite the circumstances Rook feels herself smile, she can imagine the hand motions that are going along with this story as he gets more worked up. 

“That John’s noticed how quick I move—like when apparently I destroyed his sign but there are “conflicting reports,” her words not mine, that I was at Fall’s End.”

“Which you were,” Rook supplies helpfully. 

“Uh-huh, and now she’s questioning “what I am,” because I was in the Valley one minute and stealing the Book of Joseph the next.” 

Rook makes a sound of surprise and her hands go to her bag. She hadn’t checked—after she woke up she didn’t check if the book was somehow with her. But sure enough when her hands hit the bottom she pulls out a glossy covered book with the project's emblem. 

“I don’t understand,” she says softly, “it was the bliss. I thought...I shouldn’t have the fucking book.”

“People said that shit’s crazy. That you see things and hear things...” Kenway sighs again and she hates that he’s so stressed because her. “We don’t know how the stuff works, Rook.”

Rook hums but doesn’t say anything. She can’t. Her throat closes up and tears prick the corners of her eyes. This has got to be a mind game of sorts. A kind of warfare she isn’t familiar with. One not fought with guns or drugs but with your sanity. That’s what Dutch had on Jacob, that he liked to control people using themselves as tools against themselves. She doesn’t know the man, neither of them have been that far north, but she wouldn’t put it past him to be this smart. To be this conniving to come up with such a plan.

Drive the young probie insane until she collapses at their feet begging for attention. For them to see her and say that she’s real. 

“You still there, Rook?” 

Her throat clicks when she swallows. “Yeah, I’m still here. Just…” she rubs her eyes, “are you close to getting John?” 

“Funny you should mention that.” 

Turns out John called late last night saying he had a surprise for his favorite deputy. That they’ll get together real soon for a proper confession. 

“Do you want me to come?” 

“Please.” 

That’s all she needs to hear to be on her way. The sun is just starting to rise and paint a pretty picture on the landscape, it’d make a nice drive if not for the death she passes along the way. 

She meets him outside of Falls End, just about when John calls him. His words are laced with calm temper, the sound of a man who thinks he’s won this time. And in a way he has. He’s got their friends locked in a church doing _confessions._

Rook wants to go in, she wants to stare John Seed in his eyes and throw off this whole charade they’ve got going. But Kenway stops her. 

“If something goes wrong, and it probably will, I need someone out here. Preferably with a sniper aimed at him.” 

Kenway hands off his own gun, a rifle that feels impossibly large in her hands, and gives that lopsided grin of his. “We aren’t killing him, you know where to aim.” 

There’s such trust in that sentence, in his face, that it makes her heart weak for a moment. And in that moment she recognizes deep inside her soul that she’d do anything to protect him. He’s her friend—she adores him—she just might kill for him. In a small scale she has, when she had his back taking down outposts. Could she sit by and watch John hurt him and not kill the man? 

“Do we have a signal?” She asks as they make their way through Fall’s End. It’s eerily quiet. “Someway for me to know _when_ I should shoot.” 

Kenway tips his head in consideration. “It’s got to be something subtle. Something I won’t do on accident or that you could misconstrue.” He huffs, eyes flickering up to her little perch—the water tower. “I’ll scratch behind my ear.” 

“What if you’re bound?” 

His lips twitch into something that’s almost a smile. “Smart,” he mutters, then softer, “I’ll snap my fingers.”

She laughs, already turning to take up position. “Not exactly subtle.” 

“Neither’s a bullet. Besides, it’ll happen so fast no one will have time to question why the hell I snapped in the first place.” 

It’s as good a plan as any, the only one they have, so she climbs to the top and lines up her sight through the window only to promptly watch Kenway take the butt of a gun to his face as he steps through the door. 

Instincts make her finger twitch around the trigger but she doesn’t shoot, she won’t ruin this.

She can’t see much, the only view available coming from a small window on the side of the church. She’d be shooting from an awkward angle if it comes down to it. 

Her palms are sweaty, hands constantly readjusting on the stock. She blinks to clear her vision, her contacts sticking to her eyes. She can’t make out what John is saying, most of the time he’s turned away from her, addressing the people in the room and ignoring Kenway’s unconscious body laid out in the aisle. 

He’s got his arms spread wide to the heavens, prancing around, pacing back and forth. Disappearing and reappearing in her field of view. Then he’s turning on Kenway, hand stretching out to the nearest Peggie as he curls his fingers. Beckoning almost. She has to squint to make out what’s been handed off to him. A tattoo gun. 

She wants to stroll in there and remind him that his mantra usually revolves around some form of consent, no matter how twisted it may be. Usually he doesn’t mark people until they say yes, until they look him in the eyes and tell him their sin. 

John’s getting desperate. 

Bad for them, means that he’ll probably put his all into killing them. 

Kenway wakes halfway through, he grips onto John’s arms and she sees the bastard smile ever so slightly. He’s got a bigger audience now, and he uses that to his advantage. She watches as his confidence swells, as he places a tight hold on Jerome’s shoulder and urges their friends to confess. 

She can’t help it, she looks away when John peels away the flesh on Nick’s chest. She can’t really see—the angle and all that—but she can _hear_ it. Nick’s screams are loud, ear splitting and breaking the quiet of the day. 

The same thing is going to happen to Kenway, he must know that, but he’s brave. Back ramrod straight as John washes his hands of blood and wheels on Kenway. He takes his position behind Jerome and she can’t help it, she looks away. She knows she shouldn’t, that she might miss his signal, but suddenly the idea of actually witnessing Kenway pinned and being ripped open makes her stomach churn. 

Then there’s a gunshot and she _almost_ pulls the trigger. 

All hell breaks loose after that. 

Kenway almost blows John’s fucking head off—though only they know that’s not what he was aiming for. She watches John get escorted out and practically thrown into a waiting car. 

She doesn’t take the shot. She won’t risk hitting something vital. 

“Rook?” Kenway immediately looks up and she’s not imagining the relief that washes over him as he catches sight of her. “C’mon!” He waves her down, not quite waiting for her as he runs off. Down the road to where Mary May has hopped behind the wheel of a car. 

“I’ll take the gun,” he says to her, voice calmer than she knows her own would be if she tried to speak. “Get in the back seat, we’re going to his ranch.” 

No protests rise from her lips, she hops in and hunches over. Fully aware that the windows are absolutely not bullet proof. 

Kenway takes care of most of them, though occasionally she lowers the window and jams her pistol out. Finishing people off as he moves onto the next target. 

They make it to John’s ranch just as they see a plane pull off the ground. It’s black and shiny, the project's symbol painted on the wing. It’d be pretty if not for what it stands for. 

Kenway doesn’t say anything, just sends her a quick nod and she’s climbing out after him. Helping him shoot their way up to John’s hanger, where—lucky them—a plane awaits. It’s nowhere near as expensive as John’s. But it’s got guns attached to the bottom and seats for the both of them. 

“Alright, I’ll fly.” He’s already climbing in. Extending a hand to help her clamber up the wing and flop into the backseat. She doesn’t have time to look for a seatbelt—if planes even have one—Kenway is already taking off. Driving the plane out slowly before he manages to straighten himself out and get them in the air. 

“Seems fitting that we’d fight John in the sky,” Kenway yells with a manic laugh. “He’s always liked planes.” 

John’s love for aircrafts equates to a surprisingly good set of skills. The man knows what he’s doing. He skirts around their bullets and flies below them, dangerously close. Close enough to cause the wind to rock the whole thing and almost make them go down. 

He’s trying to kill them. 

“He’s gonna kill us!” She yelps, hand flying out to grasp Kenway’s shoulder. 

“He’ll try. Don’t worry, I’ve got this.” 

Rook has to remind herself that she trusts Kenway, that he’s gotten this far by her side. There’s no reason for her faith to waiver. 

John speaks to them—well, to Kenway—the entire time. He goes on and on while her pilot stays silent. Too focused on keeping them airborn to talk. She hears the anger grow in John’s voice as Kenway ignores him and subsequently she hears the fear that trickles into his voice as his plane starts to smoke.

John goes down with a parachute, thank god, and Kenway tilts their plane down. Landing not so smoothly. 

“We gotta chase him,” Kenway struggles to pop the glass case above them. “You’re quicker, could you—“ 

“Yep, yeah, on it.” 

Their feet hit the ground at the same time but he’s right, she’s faster than him. She sprints off ahead and hears him close at her heels. Through the trees she catches glimpses of John. His coattails flapping behind him as he goes. He’s stumbling over his feet, tripping and struggling to keep upright. Still, she’s under no illusion that he’ll make this easy on them. 

Without looking back she calls to Kenway, “we should flank him.” 

Kenway says something she misses between his panted out breaths, though she hears him veer off to the left. That leaves her and John. All alone for a final standoff that she’s been dreaming about. 

She's gaining ground on him. He’s getting slower, pain evident in every movement. Her hand reaches out, almost ready to grab him. But he goes down before she can touch him. Confused, she slides to a stop, almost falling over him. There’s a gun held loosely in his hand while the other pushes over his thigh. Where he’s been shot. 

“Deputy.” 

At first she thinks he’s talking to her, but his eyes are focused to her left.

Oh. 

She turns just as Kenway tucks his pistol in his waistband. He shot John. He might’ve saved her life right then. 

Carefully she steps back, unsure if she’d be able to keep her temper in check if he were to actually address her for once. She crouches down on her heels as Kenway kneels carelessly in the dirt in front of John. 

“You want this key, don’t you?” John murmurs, tattooed hand coming up to cradle the metal. “You think this will save people, that it’ll make everything right, but you’re wrong.” There’s a tinge of sadness in his voice, of exasperation.

“No,” Kenway shakes his head, fingers curling in the dirt. “I mean, yeah, okay I want the key. I’ll take it gladly. But there’s a lot of work to be done here until Hope county is safe again. Pulling you away won’t change much, but it’s a start.”

John’s eyes narrow. “Killing shouldn’t be a start to anything.” 

Rook snorts, head dropping briefly before she checks over her shoulder. They’re alone, which is good. Exactly what they need if they want to get John out of here alive with no objections. 

“Maybe,” Kenway says, pulling off his bag to fish through it. “But we don’t intend to kill you.” He yanks out a medical kit, popping it open and pulling things out seemingly at random. 

John’s eyebrows furrow, as if he doesn’t understand Kenway’s words. Maybe he doesn’t, maybe he’s slipping away too fast for them to handle. She feels a stab of panic hit low in her belly. 

“You’re going to live,” Kenway tells him, a smile on his lips as he gets to work. 

“Bullshit. After all you’ve done you’re going to save me?” John gasps, back arching up as Kenway pours rubbing alcohol over the worst of his wounds. “God won’t forgive you just because you let one person live.”

He doesn’t rise to the bait—neither does she—they just work. Or, he does. She keeps watch, never too good with patching people up. 

“John?” 

She whirls back around at the sound of Kenway’s voice to see John lying flat on his back, hands at an awkward angle around him. His chest is hardly moving. 

“Is he…” she can’t say it. 

“No. Fuck, no, no, no.” Kenway slaps his face, rousing him for a moment. “You don’t get to die, asshole.” He raises John’s head and struggles to line his canteen up with John’s lips. Most of the water runs out of his mouth, his eyes flutter and twitch. Flicking up towards the heavens briefly before they settle someplace over Kenway’s shoulder. 

On her. 

He squints, mouth opening and closing. “Wha—“ he’s shaking, eyes slipping down the length of her body. “You…” he doesn’t finish his sentence, Kenway pushes gauze over the hole in his side and he yelps, a moment later he’s gone. The pain knocking him out. 

“Christ, I need help, Rook. Can you hold this here?” 

She knows she isn’t doing much, but she follows his instructions the best she can. Kenway's covered in blood up to his wrists. 

Eventually, after what seems like hours, Kenway speaks. “I think he’s stable.”

“We should move then.” Rook stands on shaky feet, bending to pull John up. His legs are limp—his whole body is—but she’s got Kenway to help her. They pull him along like that. It’s a slow process. Moving through thick trees and down slopes that threaten to take them to the ground. They make it though. They reach a smoking car on the side of the road and it’s as good as anything. 

“I’ll drive,” she says automatically, “it’s the least I can do.” Because after all that’s happened she feels pretty useless. She needs to help someway. 

Kenway slides into the backseat, John’s head resting on his lap. They don’t speak much during the drive, neither of them can find the energy to form words. 

Rook doesn’t ask where she should take them, figures that Kenway trusts her judgement. She chooses a small prepper stash she found a week ago. It’s behind a half burnt house, a bunker embedded into the ground that she remembers having a latch on the other side to lock it. 

It seems to take longer to drag John inside, but they get it. They dump his body on a bed and Kenway doesn’t waste time handcuffing him to the metal post. 

“We should clean up,” Kenway murmurs. “Get some food, a shower.” He laughs, running a hand through his hair. “Sleep. Sleep sounds nice.” 

It takes days to get back to where they were—mentally that is. They need a break from it all, from the fighting and rescues. From Hope county in general. There’s no rest for the weary though. The calls keep coming, transmissions from the Henbane and the Whitetails. They’re not exactly done in the Valley though. 

“We need to get Hudson,” Kenway says one morning during breakfast. Stale cereal and some fish they caught in the river down the road. “You don’t know her.” He laughs, head dipping in an unfamiliar show of humility. “You don’t really know any of my coworkers, I guess. But they’re my friends, I’ve known them for years.” He pauses, swallowing harshly when she doesn’t immediately respond. “You don’t have to come help me, you’re doing a lot already.”

Kenway meets her eyes and she knows he’s being sincere. He wouldn’t blame her for taking a step back on this one. Rook's pride makes her want to say yes though. He won’t think less of her, that’s for sure, but she can think of four people who might. 

“Maybe you can head back to the Henbane while I hit John’s bunker.” 

Her head turns away, towards the closed bedroom door where they’re keeping said man. “And him? We just leave him here?”

“No.” He frowns, leaning back with a sigh. “I’ll ask Dutch to hold him.” 

That makes her raise her eyebrows, surprise coloring her features. She doesn’t say anything though. For all she knows they’re close friends and Dutch owes him a favor. 

“You’ll call me?” She asks, head tipping up when he stands to clear his plate. 

“Of course, I’ll meet you in the Henbane soon. Just…” his back is to her, hands scrubbing away in the sink. “Don’t take the jail just yet, we should do that together. We got that call—it’s surrounded.” 

Fine by her. She can do a hell of a lot more. She can help people, try and rid her conscious of all the Peggies she’s killed. 

“Don’t get Faith angry, either.” 

She laughs at that, standing to dump her own plate in the sink with his. “What the hell am I supposed to do that won’t make Faith mad?” 

He sucks his teeth and the sound makes her cringe. “I dunno. I just don’t trust her around you. She...she hates us. Her and John both. I don’t know what she’ll do. I know we said we want to split up, but I don’t think that’s a good idea anymore. It’s not safe out there.”

It’s hard then when she gets to the Henbane with nothing to do. She can’t stop the trucks full of innocents, can’t help those on the side of the road with their hands bound behind their back. She can’t save the jail before it falls, she can’t liberate outposts. Everything would anger Faith, anything that threatens her project would make her upset. 

And so Rook goes back to the bliss.

She could find prepper stashes, stock up before Kenway meets her. The bliss is more enchanting though. She’s hoping that Faith will reveal herself this time around. 

She doesn’t, in the end. Rook wanders around in her drug fueled nightmare screaming for her to show herself. To stop being a coward and fight her. 

Kenway finds her curled up at the base of a tree miles away from where she had started. He leans over her, blessedly blocking out the sun. She still squints up at him, forearm raising to shield her eyes. 

She just barely makes out the redness around his eyes. Really there’s a general blotchiness to his face. 

“You didn’t answer when I called.”

He drops to his knees and grabs her. Wrangles her in close and crushes her to his chest. He shoves himself in the crook of her neck and sobs. Breaks in a way she never thought possible for him. 

The bliss is still in her system and it’s hard to get her brain working but she manages to sling an arm around his neck, the other around his waist. They stay like that for a while, long after his tears stop. 

“Did you get your friend?” She asks eventually. 

“Mhm.” He pulls back, body shuddering with his inhale. “We should get to the jail now. Start making a mess until she comes out.” He rubs his eyes with the heel of his palm, a half hearted smile on his lips. “I just want this to be over.” 

“It will be. Soon.” It's a lie. They can’t rush this—their lives are on the line. It makes him get up on his feet though. Has him grabbing for her hand and hauling her up. If little white lies keep them going then so be it. Worse things have been done. 

It takes an awfully short amount of time to get Faith to come out of hiding. They get the jail, destroy two of those ugly shrines and help a lady with her cougar. There’s an offer to take the furry thing with them, but they ultimately decline. Too dangerous to have a wild animal on their side. 

It takes destroying Joseph’s statue to bring her to them. 

They stand there for a while just looking over the edge. It gives her flashbacks from a week ago when she was in this very spot and stole that book. In fact…

“Here.” She takes it out of her bag and hands it off to Kenway. “You got a lighter?” 

He laughs and for the first time in a while it sounds genuine. They set the thing on fire and he tosses it over the edge with a smile. 

When they reach the bottom Faith is waiting for them. She’s walking in a slow circle, hands fiddling with the hem of her dress. At first she doesn’t even acknowledge them, just goes on humming and spinning on bare feet. 

Kenway and Rook exchange a glance, there’s something that passes between them, an understanding of sorts. They won’t run from this, even if she seems exponentially more dangerous than her brother. 

Kenway clears his throat to catch her attention. Unwilling to get any closer just to do so. Smart man.

It takes a few tense moments before Faith looks up. But when she does it’s with a frown. She’s not glowing or happy, not the tempting siren she’s known to be. She’s not hiding behind a persona. 

And that terrifies Rook. 

She doesn’t dare stand behind Kenway though, she wants to prove that she’s just as strong. 

“You killed my brother,” Faith says, coming to a stop only a foot away. “John was trying to save your soul and you murdered him for your righteous cause.” Her eyes dart away, hands clenching by her side. “Joseph says we need to be strong, that we can’t lose sight of what’s important, but I can tell that he’s hurting like the rest of us. Joseph’s thrown himself into his work like I’ve never seen. He’s destroying himself because he’s ridden with so much grief.” 

Rook notices briefly that Faith is closer. That she’s been steadily advancing on them as she spoke. 

“It’s all your fault.” 

After everything Rook has been through. All the killing and anger and stress and just fucking everything—that sets her off. She doesn’t think about the danger she could put the two of them in, she just acts. She rushes forward, doesn’t bother to pull her knife or gun, just reaches out with the intention to take her to the ground and beat the crap out of her. 

Kenway stops her. An arm loops around her waist while the other steels itself across her chest. He holds her there, feet digging into the dirt.

Rook is yelling, she shouldn’t, she should at least try and be composed. For the sake of her own name. But she can’t help it. She can’t bring herself to care because how _dare_ this woman blame them?

And all the while Faith just stares at them, at the spectacle they make. Her eyes narrow and her mouth forms into a small ‘o’ before she speaks.

“What’s wrong with you?”

The question isn’t directed at her. 

“Joseph thinks you’re special. Jacob and I think you’re mad. John had the same sentiment before you killed him.” She takes a step back, sudden horror etched onto her face as she scrambles away. Disappearing over the rolling hills as her words chime in Rook’s head. 

_What’s wrong with you?_

Faith is hard to lure out after that. But the mounting pressure from Joseph on keeping her region, not ending up like John, brings her out in the end for what they hope will be their last showdown. 

Rook wants to go, she wants to ask what Faith is so afraid of. The bliss puts her off though, makes her feel sick in ways she can’t quite explain. Kenway says he understands, tells her that he intends to keep Faith alive so they’ve got all the time in the world to ask questions. 

Rook makes a joke, says that unless the world really is ending then they best hurry. 

He laughs and sets out on his way. 

She doesn’t see him until nine hours later. He’s got Faith in his arms and like before they take a car and start driving. The entire ride she’s mumbling things under her breath and she sounds so scared that it breaks Rook’s heart. It’s easy to forget what they’ve done, to tell yourself that they’re only human and they don’t deserve death. 

But they’re driving through the Henbane and the remnants of war are still being cleaned up so she pushes her feelings down and keeps driving. 

Kenway calls Dutch on the way there and tells him that he’s got another delivery. Bless the man but the only fight he puts up is a few terse grumbles. 

Soon they’re alone again. Sitting on the edge of the mountains wondering where they should go from here. 

“We could always find someplace to sleep up there,” Rook tilts her head towards him, watches him frown. “Wait to cause chaos. Lay low before Jacob knows we’re there.”

“Jacob has eyes and ears everywhere, rumor has it. As soon as we go in he’ll know.”

She drums her fingers on the wheel in thought. “We both want this to be over.”

“We do.” Kenway tips his head back, eyes shuddering closed. “Let’s just do it. It can’t be worse than what we’ve already been through, right?” 

Wrong.

Jesus Christ they’re so wrong that it physically _hurts_. 

It pains her to see Jacob steal Kenway time and time again. It hurts when none of their so called friends ask where Kenway has been, why he keeps disappearing for weeks at a time. They want to stay ignorant, they want their hero to play that role for as long as he can. 

They’d be better off on their own, away from the Wolf’s Den. She certainly doesn’t like the place. People always fucking ask _Kenway_ for help. He’s got a reputation, he’s made something for himself and in their eyes she’s just someone who tags along. Even though she’s working as hard as he is. Even though Kenway would’ve lost his mind without her. 

“They’re ungrateful.”

He snorts, “you sound like Jacob.” 

She doesn’t say anything to that. His name leaves a sour taste in her mouth. Kenway has told her what Jacob’s done, what’s happening to him and that she could be the target in the end. 

“Makes sense,” she whispers, eyes flicking up to the starry night sky. “After all these mind games to finally be noticed by someone and become a target.” Her hand strays out to grab his, to tangle their fingers together and _squeeze_. “Tell him about me. Don’t let him avoid it. Tell him everything about who I am—let him take me.”

Kenway is about to protest, ever the martyr, but she stops him. 

“You don’t have to do this alone. It’ll at least take some of the heat off of you.” Her eyes go soft, heart strings tugging. “You need a break before you break down completely.” 

Kenway hums in agreeance before whispering a soft “okay. If that’s what you want.”

So when he gets captured again, she waits. She sits on a small mountain perch with her knees drawn to her chest and waits for Jacob’s hunters to come for her. 

That never happens. 

Kenway never comes either. 

No one does. 

For the first time in so long she’s truly alone. She’s been abandoned. She hears word that Kenway is back, that he’s tearing shit up like he always does. But he angered Jacob for real this time. He’s cracking down on things in the white tails. 

She thinks she has something to do with it. Something to do with whatever Kenway told Jacob. 

But to ignore her? To forget about her like everyone else? That’s not Kenway. 

It doesn’t take long for her to track him down. He leaves a wake of chaos wherever he goes. She just follows the trail of bodies until she finds him. He’s sitting at the edge of a lake, boots getting wet as he stares out into the horizon. 

“Kenway?”

He visibly shudders at her voice. Curling in on himself, hunched over with shoulders drawn up. Like he’s nervous. Or afraid. 

“What’d Jacob do to you?” Her tone drips sympathy, the kind that no one else extends to him. But he just laughs. Her bestest of best friends laugh right at her. 

“He made me see.” Another chuckle, angrier this time. “He made me realize that I’m insane. That,” he takes in a shuddering breath, “leave, Rook. Go somewhere else. Out of Hope county, preferably.”

She struggles for words, trying and failing to talk multiple times before she gets it. “I can’t. No one can, trying to leave is a death sentence.”

He mutters something that sounds like “not for you.” 

He runs his fingers through his hair and glances over his shoulder. His eyes scan down the length of her body and he stands. His knees wobble, like he’s been sitting there for a long while. And he approaches her. She doesn’t move, doesn’t speak—not like she knows what to say. 

“You look so real.” He whispers when he’s close enough. Inches away. His hand comes up and he touches her. Places his palm on her cheek and down the length of her arm. He holds onto her hip and drops his head to let out a choked sob. “Fuck, I’ve lost it, haven’t I?”

“Kenway...you’re scaring me.” _Jacob’s gotten into your head. Destroyed you._

“ _I’m_ scaring _you?_ How the hell do you think I feel?” He laughs again and it sounds so unhinged to her ears. “I have an idea,” he says suddenly. Brightening up in a faux display of happiness. He grabs her forearms and holds her there. “Let’s go see Joseph, let's bring his siblings and have one big ole’ reunion.” He tugs her along. Ignoring her protests. 

“We haven’t taken down Jacob—“

“ _I_ haven’t. But there’s no need.”

Rook doesn’t pull away from Kenway, she hardly speaks as he loads them into a car and speeds down the road towards Dutch’s bunker. She isn’t sure what to say. She isn’t sure how to pull him back from the edge Jacob placed him on. 

Dutch doesn’t ask questions when Kenway takes Faith and John away—without shackles binding their limbs. She reminds him that they’re dangerous, but he ignores her. Focuses solely on the Seeds. On their flurry of questions. 

“We’re going to Joseph’s compound, his church.”

John’s the first to speak. Practically leaping forward from where he’s at in the backseat. 

“Will Jacob be there, too?”

“I called him, so yes, he should be.”

“When did you call him?” Rook asks, slightly incredulous, but once again she doesn’t get a response. 

“What’s with the sudden change of heart?” John is staring at Kenway through the mirror, only slightly accusatory. 

“Jacob...he had proof at least. You and Faith just kept saying I was crazy and, I mean, why would I believe a word you two say?”

Rook turns in her seat and sees Faith about to defend her and her siblings, but Kenway barrels on. 

“Jacob proved it to me. He showed me…” he stops, fingers going tight around the wheel. “I just don’t know how to fix it.”

“So what _is_ wrong with you?” Faith ventures, “we have our speculations, but…”

“I’ll tell you once we get there, so I don’t have to repeat myself.”

And that’s that. It’s relatively quiet the rest of the ride. It’s only when they’re let through the gates and pulling up to Joseph’s church that the gravity of this dawns on Rook. They’re probably going to die here. 

Kenway takes the lead and she walks beside him. Occasionally she sees him take peaks of her out of the corner of his eyes. She sees the old Kenway in those moments, her friend, look at her with such longing. Like he wants to talk to her, like he wants to hug her and apologize. 

He doesn’t though. 

He keeps moving until he’s pulling the doors open and they’re all filing in. He lets John and Faith rush ahead of them, into the waiting arms of their family. 

It’s sweet, to see the way Joseph crumbles and how Jacob curses before holding his siblings. 

“Thought you were lying, deputy.” Jacob eventually says. Still holding onto John. 

Kenway shakes his head and closes the rest of the distance between them. 

“What was it you wanted to talk about, my child?” 

Kenway makes a few false starts. Unsure where to begin it seems. But she reaches out, takes a chance and touches his arm for reassurance. See watches him as he visibly relaxes, a sigh escaping slightly parted lips. 

“John and Faith said that I moved so quickly, do you remember that? I was seen at the Spread Eagle but then I stole the Book of Joseph in your statue. You all were curious of how I’d done it.”

“We thought you were holy. Some sort of...other worldly being,” John confesses, cheeks tinged pink. 

Kenway doesn’t deny it, just gives a sad little smile. “Do you want to know how I did it?” 

The whole family seems on edge, and for the first time Rook doesn’t think this is a trap. They’re ready to listen, ready for answers from a man who's been tearing apart their whole operation.

Joseph nods. “Go ahead.” 

“I wasn’t working alone. I had someone with me the entire time.”

Jacob tips his head and she realizes that he’s already heard this story. That he knows what’s about to be said and he’s come to accept it. 

“You can’t see her.” Kenway looks at Jacob—not at her—he doesn’t see her confusion. “She’s here right now, you just can’t see her. I...I don’t know if she’s all in my head or some kind of...ghost.”

_What._

_Wait._

_What._

_Kenway?_

“You’re not...I’m real. Hey,” her voice wavers, it shakes and drops and no one looks her way because

Because 

Because

She’s not really there at all. 

“I’m here.” She tells him, holds his arm and circles to stand in front of him. To grab his hands and force them on her cheeks to feel her.

“Deputy?” Joseph sounds mildly concerned. And she knows why. He doesn’t see her. No one does. 

“You’re not crazy. It’s not in your head—I’m here!”

Kenway looks skeptical, all torn up inside. He doesn’t believe her. 

“I didn’t know,” She tells him when he backs up and lets his hands fall away. 

“Do you recognize her?” Joseph asks, eyes flicking to Jacob momentarily. “Perhaps it’s grief.”

“No.” Kenway shakes his head. So sure about this whole thing. “She walked in to help us the day of the arrest. Like she’s alive. Like she’s real…”

His voice catches and she knows why. They’ve been through so much together. They shared laughs and cries together. They slept beside one another and understood their sleepless nights. 

Kenway breathes real slow. Once again looking to Jacob before the soldier gives a subtle, almost not there kind of nod. Again referring to something she’s not privy to.

“I’m sorry, Rook.”

Then Kenway is turning, pulling out his gun with one hand while the other rests on her shoulder to pull her in close. She doesn’t resist, doesn’t think she can because this is _Kenway._ And it becomes clear that she would not only kill for him but if she had to, she’d die for him. 

“I love you,” she says, and it’s true. She loves him more than she has ever loved someone before. From the very beginning she knew that she wanted to see him prosper, to grow and have a life after all this was over. She can’t though. She knows that she can’t. 

_Not real._

_Not alive._

“It’s okay.” She guides his hand up, lets the barrel press against her temple. His hands are shaking. She hates that she’s the one doing this to him. “It’s okay, I forgive you.” A tear slips free and runs down her cheek. Blurs his face into obscurity. “I understand.”

“I love you, too.” 

Then he pulls the trigger and everything goes black. 


	49. Mistakes Were Made [pt 1]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John gets drunk and cheats on Rook, here’s the aftermath as she runs to the only person who will take her

Rook doesn’t even have to  _ ask.  _ The evidence is, after all, right here. Not hidden, just carelessly left for her to find. Like the world's version of a sick joke. 

Except this is her boyfriend who did this. She can’t blame God for the flats left by the door beside his own that she doesn’t recognize. It’s only one person's fault that she walks further into her home and finds John’s jacket and vest over the couch accompanied by a blouse that isn’t hers. 

She doesn’t call out to John, doesn’t do their normal routine where she yells to him just to hear him come running to pull her into his arms and spin her around. She wants so desperately to imagine that nothing has happened, but she isn’t naive. She’s just never been cheated on. At least not so obviously, not so in your face and fuck you did you really think you were the only one? 

Rook leans against the wall. Breathes for a moment and lets a manic, disbelieving laugh slip. She should have seen this coming. His brothers did, they didn’t exactly warn her, but she mostly saw it in Jacob’s careless expression and Joseph’s tense, pretending to be kind smile. They’ve been through this song and dance before. They’ve seen John’s plaything week after week and watched from the sidelines as he moved along to the next girl. 

She was a new face they wouldn’t get the chance to really know, that’s all. 

Except she thought she was different. She  _ did _ get to know his family. She went to Joseph’s sermons and questioned his religion the way a child might—or an atheist like herself—and she watched him do what he did best. Talk and explain and show her how loving and great God is. He baked her cookies for the passing holiday when she mentioned she misses her mom’s baking. In turn she learned all about Joseph. All that he cared to share, which happened to be a great deal. She knows his favorite childhood memory (John’s 6th birthday, the only

time they had an actual cake, and when Jacob stole candy for them) and how he dealt with the death of his wife. 

Jacob was harder to crack, but apparently six months was a long time for someone to stick around. And so he got to know her, too. They speak those few times when John drives up to the Vet Center where Jacob volunteers. She could get lost in a conversation with Jacob—he just makes her feel like she’s apart of something. 

She thought she meant something to his family, and perhaps she did, just not to John. Silly girl. She knows his past, he was so forthcoming with it. She held him while he cried and said he regretted sleeping around, using people only for their bodies, and they didn’t really  _ know _ him. Once a cheater always a cheater.

She makes her way up the stairs, hand ghosting along the rail as she goes. There are no pictures on the walls—the only ones on the mantle downstairs of his family—and when she mentioned that to John he said he’d have to set up a photo shoot, fill the halls with him and her. Guess not. Not anymore. 

Rook stops short outside their bedroom door. She stops to listen, to see if she can hear the pillow talk John is so damn good at. The kind that makes her blush and kiss him until they're breathless. 

It’s quiet though. As if nothing’s happened at all. She knows better than that though. She opens the door quietly, stepping inside and almost refusing to believe what she’s seeing. 

Oh John. 

In her mind six months was a long time to be dating someone. That she was his forever and ever. 

He’s tangled up in the sheets with someone else. Lying on his stomach with arms folded under his head. They’re both naked, but of course they are. They’re not exactly  _ covered  _ either. And in different circumstances she’d take a moment to appreciate John’s ass or the muscles that go up his thighs. She can’t. She has to leave. Has to take her things and leave. 

Her legs force her forward until she’s standing by the edge of the bed. She crouches down until she can stare at John’s sleeping face properly. It’s only then that she realizes the wine glasses on the nightstand. 

She has to remind herself that just because he was drunk doesn’t mean he’s forgiven. It’s hardly an excuse. She doesn’t need this—she can find someone who can get drunk and won’t let random girls in the bed she sleeps in. 

“Johnny?” Her hand rakes through his hair. Mussing it up further (someone else had done it before her). Some stranger. “You awake?” She refrains from the pet names, from laying a kiss on his lips to rouse him. She just waits until his eyes flutter open and he’s staring back at her. 

His lips twitch, just a little bit drunk, and he smiles. 

“Rook.”

She hums, lets her hand fall away into her lap. He groans at the lack of contact, signing when she doesn’t immediately touch him again. 

“Are you coming to bed?”

Rook laughs, he’s still out of it then. 

“No.” She stands, ignores his pleading look because he  _ hates  _ sleeping alone. He’s been abandoned one too many times for that. He told her that once—trusted her with all the broken pieces of him. Told her that when he was young that everyone ran as soon as they saw what lay underneath his facade, all the ugly, scarred parts. They left him because they wanted perfect and he wasn’t it. They fucking abandoned him. 

She didn’t. 

She loved him. 

“C’mon,” he reaches up, pulls her arm. And she follows halfway, bends at the waist to brush a lock of hair out of his eyes and smiles cynically.

“What did you do when I was gone, John?” 

There’s a brief pause where he doesn’t speak, just thinks and frowns. She sees the exact moment when he  _ remembers _ . It all clicks and he closes his eyes and curses. 

She shakes out of his limp grasp to turn on her heel. She wraps her arm around her torso and sighs. Fighting back tears. “I’m going to call someone to...to help gather my things, then I’ll be gone.” She waits for a response. Doesn’t get one and wants to scream. “I’m leaving, John. For good.” 

Rook walks out, scared of his silence, slamming the door as she goes in hopes of waking up his plaything. 

In the end it’s Jacob she calls. It’s...awful, really, trying to explain it to him. Telling him what John did and not hearing an ounce of surprise in his voice. He tells her he’ll make the trip though, that he’ll help move her stuff wherever she plans on staying. 

She doesn’t tell him that she doesn’t have a clue as to where to go. 

“Rook.”

Her fingers dig into her palm and she keeps her eyes locked firmly on the window. 

“Darling—“

“Don’t call me that.” 

She hears him take hesitant steps forward. The thought of him grabbing her, holding her and trying to amend things, it makes her ill. And so she sidesteps him before he can get to her. Brushes past him and ignores the look of pain on his face. 

“Is she gone?” Rook bites out.

“Yes.”

She goes up the stairs, figures that she at least owes it to Jacob to gather some of her things, even if she doesn’t have a suitcase. He follows at her heels, only a step behind as she enters their bedroom. 

“Can I explain, Rook? Please?”

She goes to her drawers first, grabs her clothing in piles and lays it by the door. “Go for it. I’m not stopping you from talking.” She glares at him as he stands in the center of the room dressed only in his boxers, hands fiddling in front of him. A nervous tic that she’s almost positive is just a show. He’s a lawyer, he knows how to hide his emotions. Everything he does, everything she shows, it’s a calculated move. 

“She’s a project member.”

Rook snorts a laugh, emptying the rest of her drawer and pointedly leaving the lingerie he had bought her. “Didn’t ask about her.”

“No, no of course not.” He runs his hand through his hair, face pulled taut. “But I wanted you to know that I didn’t just go out to some bar looking for a hookup.”

“Semantics,” she mutters, “who cares how you met?”

John nods slowly, quiet when he watches her head for the bathroom next. He doesn’t speak again until she emerges with her toothbrush and razor. 

“Joseph knew her, said that she was a member of his flock and she needed help. That she was in legal trouble.” He’s rushing now, words pouring out faster than she can stop him—and she’s tempted to—because once again she doesn’t want to hear about the woman he fucked. Sounds like excuses instead of an explanation. 

She lets him talk though, knows that he won’t really listen to her. 

“I always offer my clients some of the wine I keep in my office. Hospitality.”

At that she glares at him once more. A withering stare that makes him look away. 

“I drank more than I should have,” he admits lowly. “We both did. She...she kissed me and I should’ve stopped her.”

Rook’s halfway bent under the bed, grabbing for an old blanket of hers. “No shit.”

John’s about to say more, maybe plead for her to stay, plead for forgiveness and second chances. But his head snaps up at the sound of an approaching car. Lights flash over the house and she revels in the confusion on his face. 

“That should be Jacob.” She stands, hefting a pile of clothing in her arms. 

“Jacob…? You...you called my brother?”

She shrugs, pushing past him to meet Jacob at the door. “Yeah, he didn't seem to mind.”

“I...yes, of course, that’s Jacob. He’s so helpful.” There’s a tinge of bitterness in his voice and she doesn’t much care for that. He doesn’t deserve to be angry. 

Jacob’s waiting outside, leaning against the front of his car. Offering up a grimacing sort of smile when he sees her. 

“Put it in the trunk, it all should fit.” 

She does as he asks wordlessly, too numb to speak as it hits her all at once. This is happening. This is  _ real _ . She’s leaving the man she thought she’d spend the rest of her life with. 

Jacob lights a cigarette, eyeing her as she passes. “Need help?” The cherry flares red between his lips, dangling precariously. 

“No. I got it.”

He grunts. And she just knows that Jacob’s staring at John where he lingers in the doorway from the way he shrinks back. His hands wrap around his bare chest and she sees his cheeks tinge pink. 

He tries talking her out of it. He holds her and kisses her and at one point he gets on his knees. 

Rook pretends that it doesn’t affect her. If Jacob weren’t there, a comforting presence that remains, she might’ve crawled back into his bed and never told a soul. Life would’ve went on. But there would’ve been those lingering doubts everytime he went to work, everytime he said he needed to stay later with a client. 

Trust issues have no place in such a relationship. 

“Done?” Jacob asks, hand on the car door to get going. 

She just nods, can’t speak past the lump in her throat. It hurts. Hurts so bad to drive away John and her home. It’s a pain that physically manifests in her heart and makes her choke. 

“Got a place I can take you?” 

Rook holds back a watery laugh. “Just drop me at Fall’s End, if it’s not too far out of your way.” 

He gives her a sidelong glance. “Who’re you staying with?”

“Dunno.” 

She has friends, she’s lived her all her life. It’s a convincing argument on her part. Though she hopes Jacob won't pry. Because in actuality there's no one she’d feel comfortable bunking with. There’s shame coursing through her veins and she wouldn’t be able to look someone in the eyes and tell them how John had played her after all the damn warnings. 

“I’m not leaving you on the side of the road with nowhere to sleep. It’s late.”

She hums, head dipping and fingers tangled up in her lap. She mutters a soft “oh.”

“I’m taking you home with me,” he says carefully, watching her for a reaction. 

“You’ve already done a lot—“

“You’re practically family.” He says it so easily, like he’s thought of it before but never voiced such an opinion. Maybe because he thought she knew, which is fair, she knows the Seeds have trust issues they don’t care to make public knowledge. That they have acquaintances but not real friends, they don’t just let anyone in. 

He trusts her. He loves her like his own. 

Probably more than John did. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks eventually. 

“Nope.”

And they don’t. They’re silent for the rest of the ride until they reach Jacob’s cabin in the mountains, someplace to call home. Only for now. A temporary arrangement. That’s all this is.

*****

“I still love her Jacob.”

His brother just grunts at him. Eyes pouring over some papers he’s yet to fill out. 

“I do.”

Jacob’s pen scratches away and he flips to the next page. “Never said you didn’t.” He’s still not looking at John, more focused on work—and that's never the case when John visits. His boss isn’t strict, he’s actually the closest thing to a friend Jacob’s had in awhile, John knows that Jacob could put down his work and talk away for a few hours. 

But he’s choosing not to. 

“I made a mistake.”

“You did.” Finally he looks up, but it’s cold and detached. “You said she was the best thing that ever happened to you. That she changed you.” Jacob leans forward in his chair and bares his teeth. “Was that just a lie?” 

“Of course not.”

He snorts, falling back, “then why don’t you tell Rook that?”

Now it’s John’s turn to be angry, his fists clench in his lap and he glares. “She won’t answer my calls, she won’t even tell me where she is—it kills me not knowing if she’s safe at night. If she’s going hungry or has a warm bed.”

“She’s fine.”

John’s eyes narrow. Suspicious only because he knows how much his brother loves Rook. “And how do you know that?” 

“She’s staying with me for a while. At least until she can buy a place of her own, which isn’t easy, lots of folks have had their houses for years. They’ve been passed down for generations and no one is looking to sell,” Jacob waves his hand with a roll of his eyes, “it’s tough.”

“She…” John stops, blinks real slow as if to process what’s been said. “What are you trying to do to me? Why must you steal my happiness? After all I’ve been through!” 

John stands, anger making him twitchy. His hands plant down harshly on the desk, obscuring Jacob’s work. 

“After all you’ve been through…” Jacob repeats slowly. “Never said your childhood was easy, but neither was mine.” He tips his head to the side, “or Joseph’s.” He stands too, a hard wall of intimidation. And for the first time in John’s life he’s scared of the bear he just poked. “I watched you cry and cling to me when you heard Joseph get beat for that comic that  _ I  _ gave him. I soothed you when you were beat until you were unconscious. I was pulled away from my baby brothers after trying to get away from those people who used us as fucking slaves. I went to  _ war. _ ” 

Jacob laughs and John can’t find words. 

“Joseph fought to stay with you, you were just a toddler and he loved you, but he was a kid and everyone thought you two had a better chance of getting adopted if you weren’t a package deal. So he got ripped away from you and he stayed in that foster care system for years, he was a kid and he was almost lost in that abusive place because he was so sweet. He was homeless and broke. His wife died and he had to watch his baby girl die right in front of him when her lungs began to fill with water.”

Jacob doesn’t look away, doesn’t break the eye contact that makes John shake. 

“But you don’t hear us comparing our trauma with yours. We all went through hell, there’s no need to try and play victim. So shut up with me ‘trying to steal your happiness’ because we’ve all been unhappy for a long, long time. Now leave John, get the fuck out and forget about Rook. She doesn’t want a damn thing to do with you.”

John stares at his brother. He stares and stares and wonders if he hasn’t been paying well enough attention to his siblings to not have seen this coming. 

“You two are really happy together?” 

Jacob doesn’t answer right away, he falls back down, sits in his chair in quiet contemplation before he nods real slow. “Yes. We are.”

John hurts, every part of him is screaming out in pain as he leaves Jacob’s office. He drags his feet and doesn’t look up until he’s seated behind the wheel where he finally snaps. 

He allows himself to cry. He spent days stewing in his own anger, having conversations in his head that really were on side screaming matches between him and Rook. He knows where she is, he could visit her right now. He could talk to her, tell her how much he adores her and how hurt he is. That he’ll never let her down again. 

But for now he drives home and calls that woman who ruined his life, who Rook found in his bed, and asks if she wants to come over. If he’s going to slip he might as well go all the way.


	50. Competition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Seed brothers competing for Rook and trying to woo her. Instead of kidnap and torture, it's kidnap and dine

Joseph paces his living room wildly. Hands wringing out of nervous habit like this isn’t his home where he should feel the most comfortable. As if the person in his bedroom is the owner and him the intruder. 

He sighs when he hears the door knob jiggle roughly. He needs to wait for her to calm down, he knows that, but his inner alpha is howling. Telling him that he’s doing this wrong, that chaining her ankle to the bed and locking her in his room isn’t how he should be taking care of an omega he wants to court. 

“Joseph!” 

He flinches at the sound of her voice. It sounds like she’s been crying. God, and her scent. It’s gone sour. The floral citrus mixture turned off as she grew more upset. He wants to fix that, but he knows better. His presence wouldn’t help. 

“I’m a police officer!” She threatens from behind the door, “you can’t do this! It’s a crime!” She laughs, near hysterics, “you and your family have been on our radar for a long time, this is gonna seal your coffin. John can’t get you out of this one, I promise.”

He snarls, tugging at his bun to let his hair down. He’s got a headache now. He knows the locals don’t like them, that the deputies are suspicious of them despite the fact that they haven’t  _ really  _ done anything illegal—John’s always been a master with loopholes. He’s more than aware that he’s playing a dangerous game so close to the reaping, they’re on the cusp of finishing their grand plans and he doesn’t like the idea of messing it up when they’re so close. 

He has to do this right. 

He wanders over to the door and leans heavily against it. The wood creaks with his weight. “Please calm down, my love. I’m not going to hurt you.”

She’s further away when she talks. Sounding so utterly defeated. “So what do you want then?”

“Just a night to ourselves. I could prepare us a meal?” He pauses, sucks in a breath when the only answer is her sniffling. “A way to make amends. I know you aren’t fond of me.”

“Do you realize just how many allegations are stacked up against you and your siblings? Of course I’m not fond of you.” She coughs through her tears, she’s making herself sick. “You’re terrifying.”

“Those are just rumors. Exactly as you said, allegations. Let me show you I’m a good man.”

She’s quiet, thinking hard probably. He pushes his scent out, tries to bare himself the best way he knows how to help calm her. It seems to do the trick, his omega the picture perfect image of submission.

“Then I can go home?” 

“Then you can go home. You have my word.” 

She makes a pained noise, she doesn’t believe him. Though she mumbles a soft “okay.” Granting him access. 

He takes the key out of his pocket and unlocks the door. Pushing it open slowly, anticipating some sort of attack that never comes. 

She’s sitting on the floor, leaning against the edge of the bed. She has her hands in her lap with her legs spread out in front of her. She doesn’t look up when he comes in, nor does she tense, but he smells her. She can’t hide that. She’s still scared. 

“My little omega,” he coos, kneeling down to catch her eyes. “It’s okay, there’s no need to be frightened.” 

She whines, a pretty thing that comes from deep within her throat. The sound makes heat throb in his pants. 

“You’re near your rut,” she grunts, glaring at him through her lashes. “You’re not—“ she shudders, “I swear to god if you try anything...” she lets her words hang in the air, the implication clear as day. 

“I’m not like that. Lots of alphas are, but I’m not. My flock isn’t either.” With that being said he reaches forward, past her to the bedpost where the chain connected to her ankle is hanging. He unlocks it, hand briefly stroking the skin of her ankle where it’s gone red and chafed. 

“Come, omega, lets eat.” 

It’s awkward at the table. She won’t stop moving and she refuses to meet his gaze. Her eyes are constantly roaming, looking for a way out. It hurts that she doesn’t believe him. 

He’s clumsy as he sets out plates and silverware, his hands shaking from nerves when he carries over a pot roast and some mashed potatoes. 

“Something simple,” he murmurs, “I’m not sure what you like so…if it isn’t good I can prepare something else.”

But she’s already spooning some food into her plate. Getting this over with. Then she breaks the silence, when the both of them are seated and eating. 

“I thought your project was old school.”

“We...we are?” His brows knit together. “What makes you think otherwise now.”

“Shouldn’t the omega be preparing the food for an alpha then? Staying at home and doing nothing but feeding her mate.”

He tips his head, cheeks flaring pink. “I’ll admit that the thought is appealing. But if my omega doesn’t want that to be the case, then that’s okay.”

She hums, twirling her fork in the potatoes before she brings it to her mouth. The rest of the dinner is a quiet affair. One where he struggles to quell the burning want inside him. Letting her go, watching her escape out his front door with permission to leave to his guards, it’s disheartening. 

He’ll get her back though, once the reaping comes, she’ll see the truth and stand by his side with pleasure. 

*****

It’s impossible to not be aware of his brother’s growing infatuation with one of the deputies. Which isn’t very fair because John had been the one to meet her first, to point her out to his brothers. 

He’s jealous, terribly so, enough that he can’t sleep at night. And when Joseph delivers his sermon the next morning John can smell his beloved Rook on Joseph’s skin. It mingles with the freshness of his soap—but all the showers in the world wouldn’t be able to wash her scent away. Not after spending the whole day with her. 

John can play that game. 

He’d love to wait a little while, perhaps plan their evening together like she deserves, but he wants to stake his claim  _ now.  _ Lest Joseph gets the wrong idea and thinks that Rook belongs to him and him alone. 

He isn’t like Joseph, he doesn’t send his men out to collect her. Mostly because she’s being watched very closely by the sheriff's department after Joseph’s little stunt. Rumor has it they don’t want to rock the boat, and since Joseph didn’t harm her—they aren’t doing anything. Worrying only because John thinks that Whitehorse must be planning something very soon, that he doesn't want to mess up the arrest by jumping ship prematurely. 

And so John goes in alone. Stalks her as she stumbles drunkenly out of the Spread Eagle (he’s aching to get rid of that eyesore, filled to the brim with sin and temptation that Rook has fallen into). He makes sure she doesn’t make it to her car. He grabs her from behind and drags her to his own waiting vehicle. It’s easy with how out of it she is. 

His lip curls at the alcohol on her breath that clings to her body like a second skin, filling up his car when he finally gets her in and subdued with a hand wrapped around her throat until she knocks out. 

It doesn’t take too long for her to come to, but it’s just enough time for him to get her to the boathouse behind his ranch and tie her hands together. He’d left her ankles free, he trusts that she won’t make it far if she runs. Not with his knife and gun on him. 

She wakes with a strangled gasp, eyes darting around furiously in the dark until she sees him. The only thing illuminating them is a small oil lamp sitting between them. 

“John?”

He hums, pleased as punch as he stares at her. 

“What...what happened?”

“Nothing.” He frowns and tilts his head to the side. “Why do you think something happened?”

She laughs, though it’s watery and manic, “because I’m tied up near the lake behind your house.” She’s quiet for a moment before whispering “are you going to drown me?”

“What?” The hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention, “no, god no.” He rushes forward on hands and knees, closing the gap between them. He pulls her close, yanking until she’s sat on his lap, straddling his hips. “Darling, why would I do something like that to such a precious omega?” 

She’s shaking, staring down at him as if he’s lost his mind. And truly he feels like he has. He’s drunk on her scent, being this close to her is doing sinful things to his body. He’s never had Joseph’s self control, and right now he’s just hoping he doesn’t do something he’ll regret. 

He leans up and captures her lips before she can do anything about it. It’s a chaste kiss, a soft brush of their lips that only lasts a matter of seconds, but it makes his heart race all the same. 

John sighs and gently pushes her off his lap, pressing down on her sternum until she’s forced to lie on her back. 

“Have you ever gone stargazing, my dear?”

Rook shakes her head slowly, brows furrowed as he lies down next to her. 

“It’s a wonderful time of year for such a thing. Even if I don’t know the constellations.” 

She takes in a shaky breath and fixes her eyes on the mess of stars above them. Her hands—still tied and starting to feel numb—are resting on her stomach. Fingers strewn together from anxiety. 

“T-thats Lyra. I think.” She jerks her head a little to the left, pointing as much as she can to trace the stars. “It’s, um, Apollo’s harp.”

He brightens up, snuggling closer to her to whisper in her ear. “Oh look at you, omega. So  _ smart.  _ How’d you learn something like that?”

“I’ve just always liked the stars, y’know, and outer space. It’s cool.”

He nods eagerly, and when he speaks next his beard tickles her skin and sends shivers down her spine. “Did you know I’m a pilot? The skies are something I adore. Perhaps one day I’ll take you flying.”

“Yeah,” she whispers, voice shaky, “okay.” 

He sighs, content once more, and presses his nose into the crook of her neck. She’s soft and warm, just like he imagined she would be. It’s like something out of John’s dreams. And it feels like everything is clicking into place. 

He feels himself slipping fast, sleep taking hold of him. He knows he should savor this moment, that it might take a while before they’re allowed to be together every day, but it’s been so long since he’s felt safe. 

John falls asleep not long after, clinging to Rook around her torso and mumbling soft words of endearment into her skin before everything goes a fuzzy black. 

She’s gone when he wakes, but he can’t find it in him to be angry. She has work after all, it’s only a minor setback. 

*****

If it were up to Jacob he would’ve kept her locked away in one of their bunkers until the reaping began. If it’s as close as Joseph says then no one will have time to come looking for her. Hell, they could even fake her death. 

It’d be so much easier, he’d be in his element at least. But John and Joseph told him to do something else. Something more...traditional. He supposes the image of an alpha kidnapping an omega is too barbaric for their taste. 

And so he shows up at her work, standing in the parking lot leaning against his truck with a cigarette hanging between his lips to calm his nerves. Waiting for her to come out so they can chat. 

And when she does, hair in a frizzy bun and with a slight hobble from fatigue, he perks up. Makes himself known as she gets closer and he lets out a low growl. 

The sound makes her jump and she staggers away from him, eyes blown wide and panic on her face. 

“Please don’t.” She holds her hands out in front of her, as if placating an animal. Perhaps she’s not too far off, he’s more than aware of what people think about him. 

He quirks and eyebrow at her. Deathly silent as he plucks the cigarette from his lips and tosses it to the ground, stomping it out. “Please don’t what?” 

She swallows, knees clicking together like a baby doe. “Don’t take me.” 

“Now why would I go and do something like that?” He smiles at her, it’s crooked though, not as practiced as John’s or patient like Joseph’s. It’s more of a smirk. “S’not like you’re running,” he remarks, eyeing her up and down only because he knows how badly she wants to. “Though I doubt you’d be able to, you don’t strike me as being the fast type.”

“Oh.” 

He looks away and covers up a wince. That sounded like an insult, didn’t it? 

“This is harassment,” she whispers suddenly fixing him with a glare that lacks any fire. 

“Oh yeah?” He steps in closer to her, reaching out to brush his knuckle along her cheek. “Then arrest me, officer.”

She has to tip her head back to look at him properly, and all he can see is fear. Christ, what the fuck did his brothers do to her? 

He huffs a laugh, “kidding, honey. Now go on, omega, get home, you look tired.” 

Rook doesn’t hesitate, she’s gone in an instant. Leaving a puff of smoke in her wake as she dashes to her car and pulls out of the parking lot.

That didn’t work in the slightest. And, as Jacob stands there slightly angry, he realizes what bullshit this is. His brothers’ account of their recent interactions with Rook didn’t include pussyfooting around. Why should he bother? 

He comes up with a plan, as simple as it is, in only a few days time. 

She hardly ever comes out of her house, nor does she walk to her car alone. But when she leaves to go to work in the morning, she walks the short distance down the driveway to take out the trash. It’s a small window, but it’s all he needs. 

Her back is turned towards the street and she doesn’t raise her head when his truck approaches. With a little help from their flock he was able to get his hands on a truck with sliding doors. 

He yanks her inside almost too easily. Pulling her to his broad chest and nipping against her neck as a threat, it works, quiets the yell that had been creeping up in her throat. 

Jacob huffs a laugh, going to zip tie her wrists and pushing her back onto a seat. “Stay,” he orders, climbing up to the front to start to car. 

“Jacob—“

“Hush, you’re fine.” He tries to soften his voice, to help calm her down as her scent fills the space of his car and makes him feel drunk. 

She does as told, thank god, and stays silent the rest of the ride. Only making a startled noise when they pull up to the Vet Center. 

“You’ve been busy,” she remarks dully, peering out the window, “think Hudson and I came by a few weeks ago and it was still a broken down hospital.”

He feels pride swell up inside his chest as he fixes her with a grin. “Yeah, it’s nice now, huh? Just wait until you see the inside.” 

He leads her through the walls as she swivels her head around. Flinching whenever one of his men walked by, that might’ve been his fault though, because one anyone got too close he snarled at them. A warning. 

When they make it his office he pushes her down in a wooden chair and yanks it to the center of the room. He cuts through the zip ties, mumbling a gentle “don’t move.” 

She’s strangely quiet as he ties her down with rope to the chair. Head dipped low. Her scent gives her away. Shows just how tense she is. Not afraid per se, simply on guard. He appreciates that.

“Wait here, honey.” He checks her wrists and ankles one last time before he stands back up. He goes to rummage through his fridge, humming to himself to block out the noise she makes as she squirms. 

“Hungry?” He asks, pulling up a chair of his own to sit down in front of her. 

Rook nods real slow, lips pursed as she eyes the bowl in his lap. She’s starting to understand this game that they’re playing with her. She can get out of here faster—unharmed—so long as she does what they want. And so far the things they want aren’t outside the realm of possibility. 

A dinner, a night stargazing, and now just a snack. Perhaps company. Jacob strikes her as a man not many know, and maybe he’d like to change that. 

“Here.” He holds out a slice of cheese, oh god it smells amazing. Her nose twitches, head raising in the air as a sigh leaves her lip. “Eat, it’s good, promise.” 

She believes him, they both know she’d be able to smell something that’s not cheese if he tried to drug her. And so she carefully leans forward and takes it from him. Lips grazing his fingertips as she does so. 

It’s strange at first, the way he feeds her by his hand like she’s a pup again. It’s intimate too, when by the end their scents mingle together and become one. He wraps his around her body and it’s like coming home. A mix of embers from firewood and the rolling tide, like sitting by the window when rain pitter patters on the glass. 

Rook has to bite back a whine—and it’s then as distracted as she is, that she accidentally nips his finger on the next grab for food. 

Jacob makes a pained noise, something like a grunt that comes low from his chest. “Alright,” he mumbles, voice strained as he stands up, “think that’s ‘bout enough.” He lingers there for a second, his crotch level with her face, that she notices the bulge there. 

She clears her throat and looks away. She didn’t know she had that much of an effect, just her scent alone and the possibilities that came with it. 

“Sorry, honey,” he reaches out, running a hand through her hair. “You smell real sweet, y’know? It’s gonna be hard to let a thing like you go.” He hums softly to himself when she doesn’t answer, moving to cup her cheek and stroke her skin with his thumb. “In fact…” he backs away, placing the bowl down and taking a hold of a radio. 

He eyes her, leaning against his desk before he speaks into it. “Joe? John? You there?”

There’s a pause, one where her scent goes sickly sour and he makes a gentle cooing noise at her to calm her down. 

“Yes, Jacob, I’m here. John’s beside me. We’re about to make dinner, do you think you’ll make it home?”

“Maybe. I might be a little busy.”

Joseph makes a considering hum, “with what?” 

“Rook. Our little deputy Rook is sat here in front of me just as pretty as a picture.”

“And?”

Jacob sighs, crossing his arms over his broad chest. “And can we keep her?”

Rook stills, whimpering as she fixes him with her best doe eyes. She silently pleads with him to let her go, to stop whatever nightmare they’ve thrown her into. 

Joseph’s answer seals her fate. 

“I think it’s time. Yes. Bring her home, Jacob.” 


	51. Perfect (NSFW) [pt 2]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joseph figures out his brothers had a bet and he takes her as his as punishment

“My brothers tell me this was a competition,” Joseph murmurs, brushing a strand of hair out of her eyes. She tries to squirm away from him, legs kicking out to catch him in the ankles. 

He sighs, tipping his head to regard the way she snarls at him. Yanking at the handcuffs keeping her locked into place on the floor. 

“It’s not entirely your fault. They said you didn’t even know at first. Not until after you got pregnant.” He gives her a crooked smile, “speaking of, the results came back. It’s John’s baby. Congratulations, deputy.” 

Rook whines, a low keen that tumbles out of her mouth as reality hits her. She’s carrying John’s child and she’s here trapped with a mad man. 

She wants to blame the sudden onslaught of tears on her hormones, but she knows better. She’s scared, probably for the first time since she arrived in Hope county she’s well and truly terrified. 

“Why are you doing this?” She asks, staring up at him as he stands. 

“Punishment. My brothers need to learn a lesson.”

She shakes her head wildly, the tears still running down her face. “This won’t teach them a thing.” 

“It’ll show my disapproval. It’ll give us time to speak as a family on what we’re going to do now. Maybe I’ll have enough time to convince them that you shouldn’t even carry this baby to term.”

Rook scoffs to hide her fear, using her shoulder to swipe at the remainder of her tears. “You’re sick.”

Joseph’s lips twist, as if he hasn’t been called worse. “It’s a sin,” he whispers softly. It’s hardly an explanation though, and the fact that he thinks it’s enough makes her angrier than she already had been. “I can’t excuse the fact that the baby you have inside you is nothing more than a bastard child.”

“And your niece or nephew.” 

He shakes his head dismissively, walking away from her. Leaving her alone in the coldness of a room she can’t identify. She doesn’t know where she is or if John and Jacob know this place exists. The thought terrifies her. 

She doesn’t want to die down here. Though for all Joseph had to say about her baby, he’s oddly intent on keeping her alive. Like he knows what would happen to him if his brothers found out she died. 

It’s been...three weeks she thinks. She still isn’t showing too much, just a small amount of pudge that goes over the waistband of her jeans, but it’s enough to remind her why she needs to keep fighting. 

Rook squirms on the floor, trying to get comfortable as he eyes flicker up to the clock above the open door. Joseph will be here soon, if he intends to stick to his schedule. She hears the telltale sign of a door opening from far away—she’s almost sure she’s underground, it most certainly looks like a bunker. Which would explain why it takes so long for Joseph to reach her. 

She doesn’t bother looking up as his footsteps grow near, instead she keeps her chin tucked in against her chest.

“Rook?” 

That’s not Joseph’s voice. 

Her head snaps up and she nearly sobs. 

“J-John? Johnny, is that really you?” 

He rushes forward in a flash, too quick for her to properly track before he’s kneeling in front of her and touching her. His hands roam over her face, across her shoulders and down the length of her body. Checking for damage, for any lacerations or even a slight bruise. 

“I thought I lost you,” he eventually whispers, head leaning against her collarbone as he breathes in her scent. “God, I thought you were  _ gone.” _

“Baby—“

He whines. Never in his life has anyone referred to him as something so sweet. As soft. Like he was worth something. 

“I’m okay.” She strains to kiss the crown of his hair. Jerking back against the wall as his head flicks up. 

“Okay? You’re being kept caged like an animal.” His voice breaks, hands grasping her clothes. “I’ll kill him, I fucking swear.”

She swallows, unsure how to approach that. “Can you get these cuffs off me first?” 

John laughs at that, though it’s slightly watery. He’s quiet as he produces a key from his pocket, it’s rusted and flecked with blood, but it works. The cuffs fall to the floor and she’s free. 

John has to help her walk, as soon as he lifts her up her legs turn to jelly. Pins and needles dart down her limbs, making every step painful. She clenches her teeth and keeps quiet about it though. 

Really things could be so much worse. She’s lucky Joseph didn’t hurt her, even though that doesn’t seem to matter in John’s mind, because he looks seconds away from telling her his master plan to get back at his brother.

She wonders if Jacob is faring any better. She doesn’t ask. She keeps quiet until they reach his car—she was underground, in some tiny, little bunker she’s never seen before. 

John treats her like she’s fragile. As if the smallest movement would make her break into a thousand pieces. Really the only thing that’s been wounded is her pride. She’ll survive. 

John’s not as convinced. 

“We need to get you to a doctor. Jacob’s at the Veteran Center, I’m sure they have doctors there.”

“John, I’m alright.” She reaches over and places her hand on his thigh. 

“And the baby?”

Her face pales, she was trying  _ not  _ to think about that.

He steps on the pedal harder. 

*****

“The doctor said everything’s fine, really you don’t have to dote on me.”

John just hums, ignoring her then, and places a kiss against her cheek. He bends down to nuzzle into her neck, breathing in her scent as he mumbles something she can’t make out. 

“What was that?”

“I said that you’re pregnant with our child, that’s enough of a reason for me to keep an eye on you.” He grows suddenly serious, eyes darkening. “I won’t let anyone take you ever again. I swear my life on it.” 

She pets through his hair, pulling him in for another kiss. “I know. John. I don’t doubt it.” Their kiss is soft, more gentle than she’s used to with him. It just doesn’t feel right. And so she pushes harder into him, guides him to crawl on top of her with her hand still tangled in his hair. 

She nips are his bottom lip and asks for permission inside his mouth with a swipe of his tongue. 

He moans, granting her access with sharp canines and a bruising grip on her hips. He’s the one to break it, staring at her flushed with his brows pinched. 

“You don’t think this would hurt the baby, would it?”

She snorts, tugging forcefully at his shirt until the buttons finally come undone. “They’re hardly the size of a peanut. They’ll be fine.”

“Promise me you’ll see the doctor tomorrow then?” 

She laughs, sliding her palm across his stomach and around to his back to squeeze his ass. “Promise.” 

His eyes flutter shut as she gropes every part of his body that she can reach. It’s crude, but he certainly doesn’t seem to mind. He lets her manhandle him until he’s fully naked, straddling her hips. 

Her soft lingering touches have left him hard and weeping at the tip. Begging for more. 

She laughs. “Excited? Already?” She grasps onto his length, cutting off whatever he was about to say. A moan tumbles free from his throat, the sound makes her slick between her legs. 

“For you, yes.  _ Always.”  _ He nudges her legs apart. Slotting himself in between as he works her clothes away. “Can I taste you?” He's already laying down, nuzzling against her inner thigh as he presses kisses on her heated skin. He makes his way up until his nose touches her mound, tongue flicking out before she even has a chance to answer. 

He stops there though. “You know what I want to hear, Rook.”

She groans, tossing her head back with a hand tangled in her hair. “Yes,” she grits out through clenched teeth. 

He chuckles, humming gently before diving in. The first swipe of his tongue runs across her folds, down to her entrance. His sheer enthusiasm makes him sloppy as he circles around her clit for only a second before diving inside her. 

She gasps, legs coming up to bracket around his head. That’s really all she can manage as far as moving goes because he shoves a hand on her hips and keeps her down. He mumbles something she can’t hear and the vibrations go straight to her engorged clit. 

John pulls himself away, his lips slightly more shiny than before. He sighs, resting his head down on her thigh. “You taste devine.” 

Rook takes a minute to collect herself. Savoring the image of John panting and flushed, sitting naked between her legs. 

He reaches up, unbuttoning her shirt to slip his hand down the front of her bra and grab. His finger swipes over her nipple, tweaking it until it stands to attention. 

“What do you want now?” He crawls up her body, guiding her legs around his waist. “Tell me, Rook. Let me know what you want.” 

She flushes, she hates when he makes her say it. She isn’t particularly shy, but he’s more vulgar than her by a long shot. His dirty talk comes naturally. 

“Come on,” he urges. He shoves her bra up, exposing her breasts for his hungry mouth. He waits for an answer as he sucks on her nipple. 

“Fuck me.”

John glances up at her, baring his teeth. “More specific.”

She groans. “ _ John…” _

“Say you want me to fuck you on my cock, that you want to cum around my cock. Say it, please.”

Her insides clench around nothing at his words. Her hips buck, feeling his erection against her thigh. 

Her cheeks flush red as she closes her eyes. She swallows her pride. “I want to cum around your cock, John. Fuck me, please. Just fuck me with your cock.” 

He groans, all broken and strained as he lines himself up. He sinks into her without pause, pushing their hips flush together. He doesn’t move right away, giving her time to adjust to him as they breathe together. 

Rook rolls her hips up, encouraging him to move. His eyes flutter, struggling to stay open as her walls clench around him. 

They’re strangely quiet as they fuck. More gentle too. Things have changed between them, something changed in John specifically, Rook sees that now as he holds her hips and gives sharp little thrusts. 

It’s like that, with him hovering over her with hair hanging in his eyes that she cups his cheeks and whispers “you’re going to make a great dad.”

His thrusts stutter, his momentum breaking as he looks up at her. “You think so?”

Rook nods, pulling him down for a kiss. He fucks her harder, grabbing onto her to flip them over. Putting her on top. 

“Go ahead,” he encourages. “Finish.” His hand dives between her legs, finding that sensitive little bundle as he rubs it carelessly. He watches her chest heave, tits bouncing as she begins to move. He meets her thrust for thrust, delighting in each startled gasp he draws from her. 

Her orgasm comes suddenly. Crashing over her with reckless abandon. She folds him half, laying on top of him as he finishes inside her. She doesn’t immediately get off of him, enjoying the warmth of his body for a little while longer until the cum on the inside of her thighs begins to cool. 

She’s never stayed too long, definitely not for the night. But things are different now. And so when they fall asleep wrapped up in each other’s embrace she stays. 


	52. Capture (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook cages Jacob and uses him as a bargaining chip

Rook sits back and takes some time to admire her catch. It’s a pretty sight, capturing the big bad wolf of the Whitetail Mountains. She deserves some kind of medal. Maybe free drinks at the Spread Eagle for a whole month. 

She sighs wearily, catching her captives’ eyes and offering a playful wag of her fingers. 

He doesn’t appreciate that. Jacob all but snarls at her, slamming his fists against the bars, and ouch, that makes her wince. That must’ve hurt. But if it did he shows no indication that it phased him. 

“What the fuck are you doing, deputy?”

She hums, leaning down to grab at her radio. “Right now? Killing time.”

“No.” He glares at her, “that’s not what I meant and you know it.” 

She stares at him blank faced if only to piss him off. It works. He’s easy, reminds her a little bit of John. 

“I’ve never seen you so pissed,” she whispers in slight awe. 

He laughs and it’s a mean sort of chuckle. One she’d be scared of if he wasn’t trapped in a cage. “Oh, honey you haven’t even seen the start of it. How about you let me out of here and I’ll show you just how pissed I can get.”

“Uh, no.” She laughs, thumbing at her radio as she checks her watch. “I’m not that dumb, Seed.”

“You could’ve fooled me. Do you really think you’ll get away with this? I mean really, how long do you think this’ll last before my siblings raze these mountains to the ground just looking for me.” 

“If I had to bet I’d say they’ll be looking pretty soon. Before the days end. Which is why I’ll be calling them first.”

He shakes his head at her. “So what am I? Blackmail? A bargaining chip?”

She scowls, “like it’d tell you. Just sit back and act like a good little prisoner. I’ve got a call to make.” Rook leaves him there, ignoring his angry shouts as she exits the barred off room and wanders over to the makeshift living room her new bunker has to offer. 

She plops down on the couch. She may as well be comfortable while she listens to John rant and rave. He always sucks so much energy out of her, it’s exhausting. Though she’s never been the one with all the power. Maybe the prospect of his brother being returned in tiny pieces will keep him in check. 

“John? You there?” 

The response is immediate. 

He sighs, a soft “ahh,” slipping through the radio lines. A dumber woman would think he sounds pleased. “Deputy Rook, to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Cut the bullshit. We both know your brother’s been taken, and we both know you’d do just about anything to get him back.”

There’s a beat of silence. One where she’d like to imagine him screaming, maybe throwing something at a wall because he’s a dramatic bitch. 

“You have him then?”

“Who else?” 

He snorts, “I had a list going. Jacob has a lot of enemies. But it’s better that it’s you. You’re not stupid like your hick friends. You won’t kill him.”

She hums, delighted with herself that she even managed to get this far. “You’re right about that, John.” She stretches, tossing an arm across her eyes as she gets comfortable. “So long as you do what I want, your brother will be fine.”

“And what is it that you want?”

It takes a few seconds for Rook to answer. She didn’t think he’d go along this easily. But she’s never been one to look a gift horse in the mouth. 

“Let's start with those people trapped in your bunker—I want them set free.”

Rook’s lip quirks, ready to hear him protest, but a sudden flash of light makes her jerk upright.

“Oh.” Her grip on the radio loosens. “J-Jacob. How...how did you get out?”

“Y’know it was real stupid of you to not tie me up. And to assume that a rusted, half broken cage would hold anyone.” He cracks his knuckles like some hyped up boxer, and that’s when she dives into action. 

She drops her radio, ignoring whatever the hell John’s saying, and dashes towards the bunker doors. Surprisingly she makes it up the steps and outside, but she hears Jacob on her heels. 

Rook doesn’t make it far, though it’s more than she would’ve guessed. Hell, maybe half a mile before he tackled her to the ground and pinned her with his weight. 

She yelps out his name, squirming in his grip, trying in vain to throw him off. It doesn’t work, of course it doesn’t, Jacob has at least 150 pounds on her. He grabs her wrists and presses them to the small of her back. 

“How about we take you to see John, huh?” He takes his other than and squeezes her throat, stopping her screams. “We’ll make it a little event.” 

“Fuck you.”

Jacob laughs, hauling her to her feet with little effort. Bastard. 

“How’re we gonna do this, dep? Can you behave?” He gives her a little shake, like she’s nothing more than a puppy. 

“Fine.”

For a second she thinks that won’t be enough for him, but he just huffs and forces her to start walking forward. 

She doesn’t ask him where they’re going, there’s no need, she’s a good enough tracker. He leads them to where she parked her car—stolen car—and jams his hand through the pockets of her jeans in search of her keys. 

Rook grits her teeth. He’s trying to get a reaction out of her. 

He hums softly when he finds it. “Get in the passenger seat where I can keep an eye on you.” 

Jacob doesn’t tie her up when he starts driving. A power play, she’s sure. Someway to show how she’s weak. That she won’t dare crash the car just to kill him if it means she might die too. 

“Do you even know where John is right now?”

Jacob shrugs. “We’ll try his ranch.”

“And if he’s not there?” Stalling. She’s stalling now, trying to make him go another route as they steadily approach his house. 

“We’ll wait.” 

It turns out, as luck would have it, John is at his ranch. He’s sitting on the balcony with his feet propped up on the guardrail, and sees them coming. 

Oh and the speed at which he moves when he sees Jacob step out. The moment would be cute if she wasn’t shaking from fear. 

Jacob wrangles her out of the car, keeping a hand locked around her neck. When John steps outside, ready to run into his brother’s arms, Jacob throws her down to the floor at his feet. 

“Brought you a present.”

John stares at Jacob with an open mouth, eyes flicking from her to him. John struggles to get his words out. Though eventually he settles with a simple laugh. 

“Glad to see you’re alive, Jacob. Come on, come inside. We’ll see what to do with this one.” 

All that earlier excitement and joy at seeing Jacob safe and sound is gone now. Replaced instead by a flow of steady rage as the march her into his living room. 

She gets thrown down once more, this time on a furry rug in front of a dying fireplace. They circle her like a bunch of wolves. 

“What now?” She snaps, sick of their staring.

Jacob shrugs, “up to you, Johnny.”

John seems absolutely delighted by that. He smiles wide and goes to crouch down in front of her. He lifts her head with a single finger. “I’ve been waiting to get my hands on you, Rook. Oh, the things I’ve imagined...and now it’s all about to come true.” 

He looks back up to Jacob, “hold her still,” he commands, which is all the warning she gets before Jacob pounces. He grabs her ankles and yanks, stretching her out on her stomach. 

John’s eerily quiet as he grabs a knife from a kitchen and sits back down beside her. Her whole body tenses, everything inside her screaming danger. 

“Now hold still, dear, I wouldn’t want to cut you.” 

He begins slicing through her clothes like they’re nothing at all. Like he’s done this before. She wouldn’t put it past him. 

She doesn’t fight him, she truly does believe that he’d cut her and feel nothing at all. He must be feeling  _ something _ though, because she’s just about eye level to his crotch and he’s not bothering to hide the growing bulge tucked away behind his pants. 

Rook clears her throat and looks away. She shouldn’t feel anything at all. Hell, she should at least fight when Jacob winds his arm around to her front and undoes her jeans. 

“You’re strangely submissive,” John murmurs in her ear. “What’s gotten into you?”

“I think she wants it.” 

Rook makes a startled noise and drops her head into the fur carpet. She stays still as she’s undressed the rest of the way, breathing heavy as John slides his hands on her bare back. 

“You want me to touch you, huh, deputy? I mean, c’mon, you’ve had so many chances to run by now. To at least fight. Instead you’re just laying there. Waiting for it.” 

Rook can’t deny that. In fact she doesn’t trust her voice at all. 

“I don’t think you deserve that.” He must direct his gaze over to Jacob, because so many things happen at once without a word being passed between them.

She’s flipped over on her back by Jacob, who’s already shedding his clothes. She tips her head back to see John stand and unbuckle his belt. 

He falls back on a nearby chair, his hand dropping to his open fly. 

Jacob crawls over her, nipping at her ear. “Pay attention right here, honey.”

She scoffs, glaring back down at him. “You’re not even naked yet, what’s there to pay attention to?”

“I don’t have to get naked to fuck you.” He laughs at her reddening cheeks. Nudging her legs apart to fit himself in between. 

His jacket is gone. His grey shirt underneath stayed on, same with his jeans. He kept a hand on her shoulder as he tugged himself out. He’s not fully hard, hadn’t been touching her the same way John had so she’s not too surprised. 

He fixes that now, strokes himself as he gropes her chest. Rook squirms under him, hyper sensitive and more than a little aroused at the sudden turn of events. 

“You ready for me, baby girl?” 

Rook groans at the pet name. 

“I’ll take that as a yes.” 

Jacob lines himself up and shoves his hips forward. Sinking into her tight heat. He’s as careful as he can be as she hisses through clenched teeth. If she didn’t know any better she’d say he enjoys the way she gasps in pain from how he stretches her. 

His hand drops to her waist, giving it a brusque squeeze while his other hand stays on her tit. 

“C’mon, don’t be such a passive observer in this,” Jacob gripes, pinching at her nipple painfully hard. “We wanna give John a show.”

_ Oh.  _

She forgot about him. She tips her head back to see John palming at his junk. 

She mutters a soft “fuck,” reaching out to hold onto Jacob. Her nails dig into his ribs, scratching him in retaliation for his slow thrusts. 

Rook wants faster. She wants harder and more. So much more. 

Jacob huffs a laugh. “Something wrong, Rook?”

“Could you, uh, move a bit faster?” 

“Beg for it.”

Her cunt clenches around him at the drop in his voice. It makes him laugh as he gives a sharp thrust into her that bumps against her cervix. 

She cries out, her back arching off the carpet and up into him. She clings to Jacob, wrapping her legs around his waist. 

Behind her she hears John moan.“She looks so good under you. So tiny.” There’s the wet noise of him jacking off, his hands roaming his cock to get himself off. 

“She is. Could fucking snap her in half if I wanted. Gonna make her cum first though, huh, sweetheart? Is that what you want?”

“Yes.”

“Then beg.”

Rook glares up at him, and all he can do is give her a soft smirk. 

“Please,” she finally grits out. Swallowing her pride if it means some sort of relief. But that’s not good enough for Jacob. 

“Please what?” He jackhammers into her then just to hear her scream. “You want more of my dick? You want me to fuck you harder?”

She nods sporadically.

“Then why didn’t you just say so?” 

He really fucks her then. Uses all his energy to pound her pussy as hard as he can. Making obscene noises ring out in the room. It’s almost enough to drown out the sound of John finishing across his knuckles. Almost. His groans make her hurtle towards her end faster.

Jacob’s soon to follow. Just a few more thrusts and he coming inside her. He’s quiet about it. Just a twist of his lips and a downward tilt of his brows. Then he’s rolling off her. Keeping one hand on her stomach as if she’d really go anywhere. 

She’s fucking exhausted. 

Jacob recovers faster than her. Bastard. “D’you wanna go at her, John?”

John shakes his head. Motioning down to his messy fingers. “No, I already...y’know...we have to let her go anyway. I called Joseph when I heard she had taken you. He’ll be here soon.”

In the end they throw her clothes at her and shove her out the back door like she’s nothing more than a stay dog. Assholes. They’re complete assholes, hell, they didn’t even give her a rag to clean herself off with. When she makes it back to Falls End she still feels Jacob’s seed running down her thigh.


	53. Mistakes Were Made [pt 2]

Rook is almost positive she should leave Hope County. Go back to Missoula and move back in with her parents. Let them know that those postcards she had been sending them filled with bountiful tales of her new life fell to shambles. 

Jacob doesn’t want her to go anywhere. He says it’d be a mistake to leave without even speaking to John. He loves her like family, he’s only trying to help. All fucking excuses to keep her rooted down somewhere she doesn’t belong. 

“We’re practically living on top of eachother, Jake. It’d be so much easier for me to go someplace else.” 

“Are we really having this conversation again?”

Rook sighs in response, though she doubts he can hear her over the pounding of the shower. Even with the door open. 

“I’d be more willing to let you go if it didn’t feel like you were running away.” The shower shuts off and from her place at the stove she hears him pad over lightly on bare feet. “C’mon, Rook, at least talk to him.”

“What’s there to say? He fucked another woman in our bed!” Rook turns around, glaring at Jacob where he stands dripping wet with a towel hastily thrown around his waist. He at least has the decency to look sheepish. 

“He’s upset,” Jacob murmurs. “He's not acting like himself, he’s falling into all his bed habits. Rook, you kept him stable.” Jacob has this look on his face, slightly pleading, and she’s never seen it before. “Can you at least do it for me?”

She groans, turning back around to flick the stove off. “You’re a bastard, you know that?”

He laughs, “is that a yes?”

“Yes. Fine.” 

She’d do just about anything for Jacob. At this point she owes it to him, he was kind enough to invite her into his home and treat her like family instead of tossing her out like his brother had done. 

So for him, she’ll talk to John. 

It takes a week for her to work up the courage to see him. The drive to his ranch feels longer than she remembers. More foreboding too. 

It takes her awhile to get out of her car. She waits just to see if all her dreams would come true, if John would burst through the doors and pull her in for a hug. He’d apologize and lay kisses across her face. He’d tell her what a mistake he had made and just maybe she’d be able to forgive him. Things could go back to normal. 

That doesn’t happen. 

She climbs out of her car and pulls the key from her pocket. She had wanted to toss it, she almost did, but Jacob had stopped her. He’s a blessing. Better than John in almost every way. She wouldn’t admit that to anyone though, not after living happily her after with his younger brother for years.

Rook, once again, expects all the stars to align as she pushes open the door. She’s loud enough that surely someone would hear her. She waits in the living room for a few seconds. Hoping against everything that he’d come rushing down the stairs.

She’s left disappointed once more. 

With a sigh she ascends the stairs, keeping her ears open for a sign of him...or anyone else. God, she prays there’s no one else. She wants to believe that there’s no one else. That it was just a one time thing, a mistake. 

But John is nothing if not a creature of habit. 

He’s not in his room when she goes looking, but the shower is on. The door to the bathroom is closed, which is strange, he always leaves it open, but that was when she lived with him. When there was always the possibility of her slipping in the shower along with him. 

For now she waits. She sits down on the plush bed they once shared, and holds her breath as the shower cuts off and the door opens. 

It’s not John that steps out. It’s a woman Rook doesn’t recognize. 

She’s wrapped in a towel and nearly flies backwards at the sight of Rook. She clutches her chest and just stares, waiting for some kind of explanation. 

“Who are you?”

Rook wanted to tell her that she could ask the same thing. But no, that’s not true anymore because she doesn’t live here anymore. 

And yet despite all that she says “Rook Seed.” She’s family still, that’s what Jacob said. She deserves their last name. 

“Oh..are you John’s sister?”

Rook snorts. She must not be anything serious if she doesn’t even know John’s family.

“No,” she shakes her head with a laugh. “I live with his brother Jacob, up north. I came by to visit John. Any idea where he is?”

The woman nods shakily, looking a lot less uncomfortable than a moment ago. “I think he’s in the garage. Said something about checking out his plane.”

“Great. Thanks.” She can’t help but be short with this woman. This new plaything John’s found himself. It hurts, every part of her screams out with pain as she makes her way to the garage. 

She sees John before he notices her, and for a while she just watches him work. He has a rag tucked into the back pocket of his jeans. His vest is gone and his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows. His hair is a mess, slightly wet and unstyled. She once told him she likes it best like that. 

He takes a step back, tipping his head this way and that as he examines the body of his plane. 

Rook leans against the guardrail of the steps, clearing her throat to catch his attention.

He glances over his shoulder sharply, an annoyed scowl on his face. Then he realizes it’s her and…

“Rook. Darling, hello.” He's got such a wide smile on his face. One she hasn’t seen in such a long time. “What’re you doing here?” 

“I came to talk.”

He nods quickly, abandoning his task to rush up the stairs to meet her. Before she can refuse he wraps his arms around her, laughing like a child. 

“Then we‘ll talk. God, it’s so nice to see you again. I was so worried.” He buries his head in the crook of her neck, breathing in deeply. His chest shudders and she feels wetness gather on her skin.

“Are you...crying?”

He hums, pulling back to hold onto her shoulders. “I missed you, that’s all.”

Rook nods, still thinking of the woman in his living room. She reaches up to hold onto his wrist, she gives it a gentle squeeze. “You don’t look well, John.” 

“Oh.” He laughs softly, head ripping down, “haven’t heard that in a long time.”

She frowns at his attempt at a joke. “No, really,” she pushes, touching his cheek despite herself. “When’s the last time you slept?”

He sighs wearily, leaning into her palm. “I missed your constant worrying. It’s nice. Makes me feel loved.” He tips his head to kiss her hand, moving up her wrist and arm, until she has to stop him. 

“Are you coming back home, my dear?” 

“I want to.” And that’s the truth. A part of her heart still loves John. But now another part belongs to Jacob. “But we both know I can’t.”

He wipes at the underside of his eyes, pouting. “Rook…”

“You cheated on me. After I was so good to you. And I can’t forget that.”

“I-I know. I just…is Jacob treating you well?”

She smiles, taking a step away from him. She needs to leave, this isn’t going to end well. “Yes.”

He sighs. “Then go back to him, Rook. Get out of my house, please, before I make a fool of myself begging.” 

She doesn’t say another word, just walks out of the garage and leaves. She goes back to Jacob like John suggested, and he finds her crying in the shower. Curled up with her skin wrinkled from the water. He picks her up and carries her to the bed where he lays her down. Wrapping her up in a blanket. He sits on the floor beside her, carding his fingers through her hair. 

She hates that she loves John when she shouldn’t, she hates that John fucked her over, she  _ hates everything.  _

Jacob makes it better. He won’t make the same mistakes his brother did. He’ll keep her safe, he’ll make her happy like she never has been before. He’ll make John regret losing a girl like Rook. 


	54. Just a Little Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook gets sick of the fighting and finds herself a lodge to make her own

Rook doesn’t have many days off, the resistance can’t afford it, but it’s enough days spent by herself to consider finding someplace more...permanent. Someplace that she could even call home, a private little getaway. It’s a nice thought, and once it’s inside her head she can’t get it out. 

It takes a while, but eventually she manages to find an unoccupied lodge ( _ lodge not cabin, it’s fucking big)  _ and clean it up a little. It’s a bit too close to a peggie camp, just a ways up north in the Whitetails, but they’re young and seem harmless for the moment. Most importantly though, they don’t realize that the previously unoccupied lodge is suddenly very much occupied. 

She doesn’t intend to stay there for long, just a day or two at a time when she gets the chance. But as it turns out one too many days of killing and trying not to  _ get _ killed, starts to wear on someone. 

Rook doesn’t realize how long she’s spent in her new home until the radio calls start to come in. 

She hates to admit it but it annoys her. How the hell did they survive this long without her to do all the work? She can’t take it anymore, it’s wearing on her. Somedays, most days honestly, she wants to quit. 

For the time being she can ignore the calls. No one knows where she is. But they’ll start looking soon enough, give it a day, two at most. And god help her, call her a terrible person, but she needs a plan so they  _ can’t find her at all.  _

It’s easy. Ridiculously so. The solution is right in front of her face, after all. 

The Peggie camp. She’s so damn close to that camp that really it wouldn’t be such a long shot that there’s a long house—a peggie house—a little ways away. 

She just needs the clothes to pull it off. 

.0.

“Laura, Frankie!! The sinner is in the camp!”

_ Fuck.  _

_ Oh fuck.  _

Rook turns around slowly, her hands raised in the air to keep from getting shot right between the eyes. 

She swallows thickly, fingers clenching into fists as she faces the girl—a kid really, just a kid—that caught her. It had been stupid to think that she could sneak through an entire camp unnoticed. 

The girl standing in front of her has a pistol aimed at her. Her hands aren’t shaking at all, though she’s only about 16. Rook isn’t about to shoot a kid. She can get out of this, if the person threatening her wasn’t so  _ young _ . 

_ Fucking hell. Say  _ something _. _

“Hey…”

“Shut up.” The girl turns her head towards the open doorway, and that’s when she let her mask slip. Panic showing clearly on her face. “Laura! Frankie!!”

Rook cringes at the way her voice rises. It bounces off the walls terribly. 

“Christ, Abby, what?” A thin man with a smattering of freckles peers inside, eyes slipping over the room and landing on her. “Oh. Oh shit.” He dashes into the room, shoving the girl back behind him. “Leave, Abby, ring the alarm.”

“I can’t leave you alone.”

“Laura is on her way. It’s fine.” 

Laura, as it turns out, is fucking huge. Not tall per se, more average, but god her muscles...Rook is instantly scared. She makes Frankie look tiny in comparison. 

“Hi,” Rook tries again. “This is awkward.”

The two of them share a look, confusion being the one she catches sight of first. They probably have a lot of ideas piled up in their head about what the dreaded sinner must be like. And obviously she isn’t meeting up to expectations. 

“I just need some, uh, clothes.” She jerks her thumb behind her, off towards the dresser she had been rummaging around in. “If you don’t mind, that is.” She tries for niceties, cringing when Laura curses low. 

“Yeah. Go ahead. Take it and get the fuck out. We’ve got kids here.”

Rook gets the message. She’s pleading now, and Rook understands why. These two are young, 20? 22? Too fucking young to be doing what Joseph is asking of them. 

Rook nods, turning to grab a shirt with their starburst emblem on it and a pair of beige pants. 

“I’ll just be going now...sorry.” 

She slips out the window and sprints home, surprised when she doesn’t keel over from a bullet finding its home in the back of her head. 

.0.

The knocking at her door is starting to drive her mad. She’s about to take a bath, minutes away from undressing and getting clean, when it starts. 

She tried to ignore it, really it couldn’t be anything but trouble, but whoever it is seems to be very determined. 

With a snarl she shuts the water off and stomps towards the door. There’s no peephole, no window either, and so she throws caution to the wind, flinging the door open. 

“What?!”

Joseph, for what it’s worth, doesn’t turn tail and run, he even manages to hide his flinch decently. 

Behind him, past the layer of shock that washes over her, she registers the rest of his family standing on her doorstep. 

She’s the first one to speak.

“Shit.”

Jacob snorts, leaning against the handrail leading up to the door. 

“How the hell did you find me?”

“My flock called me. Said that you made an appearance a few nights ago, looking for clothes?” He frowns, either not believing his people or unsure of her intentions. 

“Right, yeah, I did.”

John steps forward, nudging Joseph out of the way to get her attention. “Are your friends not kind enough to lend you some? After all you’ve done for them they can’t even realize when you’re in need of clothing?” 

Rook grits her teeth, turning on her heel. She doesn’t even try to slam the door in their faces. She knows they’ll follow her come hell or high water. 

And, as she predicted, they do. Faith is at least nice enough to close the door behind her. 

“I know what you’re doing,” she gripes at John, heading off towards the bathroom. “Trying to turn them against me.” She sighs, dragging her hands over her face. “And it’s kinda working.”

She hears John sputter. “W-what?”

“I don’t want to fight.” She turns the water back on—she intends to take a bath whether they leave or not. “I’m tired. Like really, really tired, John.”

“Oh.” He’s hovering in the doorway of the bathroom, arms crossed over his thin chest, “what are you doing?”

“Getting ready for bed. Can you,” she waves her hand away, and he gets the message, taking a step back and pulling the door shut with him. 

She still hears them outside, the bastards that they are, of course they don’t leave. They’re making themselves right at home. 

She doesn’t make her bath quick. Just to spite them. She takes her time drying off and dressing into loose, tattered pjs she doesn’t remember getting. 

They’re waiting for her when she walks out. Staring at her silently as if she’s going to be the first to speak. Stupid, considering she doesn’t know why they’re here in the first place. Or why they didn’t just shoot her and haul her in. 

John steps forward, glancing off towards his siblings before speaking. “Can you take a seat? So we can talk?”

Rook doesn’t say anything, but she does so as he asks. No harm in it. She’s happy for now—not being forced to fight or argue—right now she’s just Rook, and so long as they keep it that way then she’ll be civil. 

Sitting around a table with the Seeds is a strange experience. She settles her hands in her lap and keeps her eyes pointed downward. She can’t handle the way they’re staring at her. 

“Rook,” John begins timidly, “where have you been? We thought you died.” He swallows audibly, leaning in to try and catch her gaze. “Then we had people, your people, throwing around horrible accusations about what we’ve done to you. You scared us.”

It’s laughable, the idea that she could ever really scare any of them. But she catches sight of John’s expression and she doubts herself all of a sudden. Then again, no ones talking beside John—their Baptist—the one who is so damn good at twisting people’s minds against them. 

It’s probably an act, but unfortunately, after all the negligence, that’s all she needs. 

“I want to help people.” She looks up, brows tilting down, “I want to be useful. And with the resistance I found that. But it’s just...it was never ending. A job with no satisfaction because no one ever told me how good I was doing. I never even got a thank you. Not once! It was thankless…” she breathes out slowly, suddenly feeling silly for losing her composure like that in front of her enemies. “I need to take care of myself. Is that selfish?”

“You? Selfish? Goodness, darling, no one could ever call you that. Not after all you’ve done. They don’t give you the credit that you deserve, that’s all.” 

She nods along with his words, fear spiking in her heart. “Please don’t tell anyone I’m here.”

Jacob snorts, “they’ll find you eventually. They’re on a manhunt for you right now, honey. Can’t do a damn thing without their beloved, deputy.” 

It’s an insult aimed at the very people she’s meant to protect, and yet she can’t help the chuckle that falls from her lips. 

“We can help,” John says quickly, “we can give you lodgings among our own people—they won’t find you there.”

“No. No, I want to be alone.”

John sighs, falling back in his seat. He looks off towards Joseph, and that must be his cue because his steps in. Reaching out to lay his hand on top of her. 

“My child, we can only do so much to protect you when you’re out here by yourself. But we will respect your wishes to be left by yourself, unlike your friends, just do us a favor and perhaps give us a heads up if you plan on sneaking into one of our camps. You gave them quite a fright.” 

She cracks a crooked smile at him, “thank you.” She flicks her gaze around to the four of them, “now get out of my house, I’m fucking exhausted.” 

.0.

As it turns out, the younger Peggies in the nearby camp aren’t completely brainwashed. In fact, they’re scared. Not all of them want to kill, most of them have normal doubts about what Joseph might ask them to do. Will they have to work with John and face his wrath? Will they be sent to Faith and be put around so much bliss they might never be the same? Or maybe Jacob, who will turn them into killing machines that tear apart families without question?

Rook doesn’t know what to tell them. She wants to be as neutral as possible, but making these people canon fodder for the project isn’t high on her list. 

She’d bring the issue to Joseph if she knew how he’d react. 

So instead she lies to them. Says false, vague reassurances that sometimes make them sleep a little easier. 

At least they don’t expect much from her. Not like the resistance did. They just...see her when they see her. Sometimes she doesn’t show up for weeks at a time, and then she does, she strolls past the gates and they greet her with tentative smiles and offerings of food. 

Things are somewhat normal until the Seeds show up. 

Jacob, most notably. 

She’s there for once, warming her hands by a bonfire and chewing on a hunk of deer, tossing occasional scraps to Boomer at her feet. 

He pulls up in a truck with the project's emblem. A man in the passenger seat and a wolf in the back. 

Rook feels the insane urge to run. Must be muscle memory. She pushes it down and looks away when she hears him come near. 

“Deputy Rook. Always a pleasure.”

She looks up at the sound of Joseph’s voice. She hadn’t seen him from so far—he doesn’t have the same shock of red hair that made her recognize Jacob—but it’s him alright. 

He’s smiling down at her, a book clutched to his chest. Not  _ his  _ book for once, something more worn and normal looking. Like a journal. 

“Joseph.” Her eyes shift over to where Jacob’s stood next to his brother, gaze constantly shifting across the camp. “What’re you two doing here?”

“I’m helping Jacob look for recruits.”

The people sitting around the fire with her stiffen. She has a feel she should too, just out of principle.

“Oh?” She forces a smile, “recruits for what?”

“Our army, deputy.”

“Mhm.” She stands up, placing her plate down for Boomer to finish. “And, uh, you don’t think these kids are too young?” Her smile is still there, falsely sweet. She’s sure Joseph can see the hatred burning in her eyes. 

“They’ll go to a different camp first before they go into basic training,” Jacob cuts in, still not looking at her, too busy searching for his new victims. “Sorta like Boy Scouts. Learn how to survive first, before they learn to kill and fight.”

“Right. And they...want that?”

Joseph sighs, frowning at her with fatherly disappointment. “Deputy, some of these members have been born within the project.”

She drops the smile. Act falling all at once. Carefully she takes a step forward, ignoring the panicked looks she’s getting from the few friends she’s made. 

The Father, to them, is some sort of God. He’s not to be questioned. He holds too much power for that. 

“So they didn’t have a choice. Have you ever asked them if that’s what they wanted?” 

Joseph opens his mouth but just as quickly it snaps shut. He gives a little shake of his head. 

“They’re nervous, Joseph. And being whisked away and never heard from again isn’t helping. They don’t even know what they’re getting themselves into when they’re assigned to help your family. At least be a little more...I dunno, revealing?” 

Jacob shakes his head, glaring at her, but he doesn’t say anything. 

She decides to aim her next words at him. So he can’t ignore her anymore. 

“Didn’t think you were in the market of hiring child soldiers, Jacob.”

A flicker of anger passes over his face and he takes a step towards her. Closing the gap entirely. He doesn’t speak still. Not yet. 

“I mean, I sort of assumed you saw that shit in Iraq, or is that where you got your inspiration?”

He snarls at her, fingers twitching like he wants to grab his gun. “I don’t have to take this shit.” He glances off towards his brother. “You deal with her. And you can figure out what the fuck we’re supposed to do when next month we don’t have enough troops.” 

It’s eerily quiet once Jacob has left. Everyone is looking off somewhere else, unable to meet Joseph’s eye as he frowns and bites his lip. 

She shifts on her feet, letting her hand drop when Boomer nudges her thigh. She fiddles with a loose strand on her shirt, humming under her breath. She doesn’t know what to say. She kinda...lost it there, huh? 

“You’re right.”

Her head snaps up. Eyes blown wide as she leans forward. There’s no way Joseph had been the one to talk, to admit that she’s right and he’s wrong.

“I never asked them. Nor did I let them know what they were expected to do once they got older. I just...disregarded all that.” He closes his eyes with a shake of his head. “That was selfish of me.”

“Yeah,” she murmurs, scratching behind her neck, “I mean, there’s a reason why the resistance is so scared of your family.”

He winces, looking all in the world like he wants to be anywhere but here. 

“Perhaps you’re right about all that.” He looks up at her, lips twisting. “Maybe you could help?”

“Wha—?”

“You can say no, my child, but it seems like I’m doing something wrong if my own flock is starting to fear my siblings and I.”

There’s an immediate uproar of refusals and apologies from the Peggies around her. Reassuring their Father that they love him, they’re not scared of him at all, they’d do anything for him, the sinner has no clue what she’s talking about. 

He shushes then softly with a raise of his hand. 

“Rook?”

“I...I was trying to distance myself from the fighting.”

“I know.” His lips curl up into a smile. A light shining in his eyes at the thought. “You won’t be fighting. You’d be working behind the scenes to make our methods less...aggravating...towards everyone else.”

She...likes the sound of that. For the first time, actually helping people, and getting something in return. Reaping the benefits and watching people prosper. It should make her sick, that her loyalties have switched so suddenly—god what will the resistance think when they realize she’s not dead or maimed? That she hadn’t been forced?

She can’t think of that. She just wants to be happy. 

“You know what, Joseph, I think you’ve got yourself a deal.”


	55. Insecure (NSFW)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rook is pregnant and she feels more than a little insecure

The knock at the door is soft, almost nonexistent. And if it hadn't been for her stepping out of the shower a couple minutes ago she wouldn’t have heard it at all. 

She’s tempted to leave whoever’s there without an answer just in the hopes that they’ll go away. She’s...in a mood. John says it’s a side effect of pregnancy, but that just sounds like an excuse. 

“Rook?” 

It’s Jacob. Gravel rough voice twinged with concern. She sighs. No getting out of this, not when he’s involved—more fiercely protective than both of his brothers combined. 

“You alright in there?”

She swallows past the lump in her throat. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m just...looking.” Rook scowls at her reflection, twisting around to see the way her stomach bulges. 

“Looking? Rook come on out. The baby—“

“Is fine.” She doesn’t mean for her words to turn sharp. For her fangs to show themselves as her claws lengthen, it’s not fair, but she can’t help it. 

“Let me in, honey.” 

The knob jiggles and she knows there’s no way she can dissuade him. 

“Alright, alright, just...give me a minute.” She takes her time pulling on her clothes. Hands rubbing over her belly. She’s so big, five months along now. 

When she opens the door Jacob is standing there, hair a mess like he spent the last couple of minutes running his hands through it. 

His eyes dart down to her stomach. Lip twitching. “You okay?” 

She feels bile rise up in her throat. A million words on her tongue that she can’t get out. So instead she walks forward, a hand settling on Jacob’s cheek, rubbing across his beard. 

She leans up on her tiptoes to kiss him. 

And he pulls back. 

“The baby is okay?”

She’s hoarse when she talks next. “Yes.”

“Good...that’s good.”

He leaves her standing there. Slightly miffed and more than a little insecure. Maybe, and she really wouldn’t blame him if this were the case, maybe he’s having doubts. Not about the kid, despite his nerves he wants to be a dad, but about sharing her with his brothers. Maybe he’s starting to realize that they won’t know who the child belongs to and he doesn’t want that. 

Maybe he’s sharing her thoughts and just really hates her body. 

Rook goes to lay down and sleep. 

.0.

She wakes up and instantly knows who’s spooning her from behind. He’s warm. No, scratch that. He’s fucking burning up like he always is. Putting off heat like a furnace.

Rook touches his hand where it lays across her stomach, tracing tattoos until she feels him rouse. 

“Little early to sleep,” she comments.

John hums. Snuggling in closer. Nuzzling the crook of her neck and making her skin itch because of his beard. “Maybe. But I saw you and couldn’t resist. You looked comfy.”

She wants to say something about sloth being a sin but she keeps her mouth firmly shut. She isn’t in the mood for some sort of lecture.

Rook squirms in his arms, moving around until they’re facing each other. Noses inches apart. His breath is warm and smells of coffee, she’s tempted to go back to sleep. 

“Still tired?” His hand is still on her stomach. Gently prodding as if looking for life. It’s a habit he’s picked up and she can’t say she minds. 

He’ll make a great father. 

“No. No, just warm. Happy too.”

“I make you happy?” 

She laughs, capturing his lips. He pauses, breath sucking in harshly like he hadn't expected it. But then he’s kissing her back, moaning into her mouth until he has to push her back with a sigh. 

“Keep on like that and I won’t be able to stop myself.” 

Rook smiles, nibbling at his pulse point. The way they’re tangled together makes it laughably easy to feel how hard he is beneath his sweatpants. 

Which, she just realizes, isn’t something he usually wears. She fiddles with the waistband. Pulling it back and letting it go to clap against his hips. 

“Never really see you in creature comforts.”

“Like I said. You looked comfy. I couldn’t sleep in jeans.”

She pulls back slightly, her knee still against his crotch. 

“I like you in jeans.”

That gets a laugh out of him. All bright and warm. Eyes crinkling at the corners as he wraps his arms around her and pulls her near. 

“You just like my _ass_ in jeans.”

She nods, her hand dropping to cup over his bulge. She pushes down the best she can—the angle is off and her wrist starts to hurt, but it gets the job done. 

He whines. A pretty sound she hasn’t heard in months. 

“Rook. Please, we can’t—“

She snarls at him, anger peeking through at the rejection. 

“Darling,” he mumbles, pushing her away, “really. Stop.”

Her hands are shaking. Falling limp on the sheets between them. He asked her to, so she won’t push, but that doesn’t mean she isn’t more than a little wounded. 

She gets up faster than she should. Her head throbs uncomfortably as she swings her legs over the edge of the bed and stands up. 

“Rook—“

“Shut up, John.” 

She leaves him there, in the room they all share. The room they once fucked her silly in at the same time. They put a child in her and now they don’t want anything to do with her. 

She wouldn’t be surprised if they’re getting some action on the side—someone who doesn’t look like they swallowed a basketball. 

“Joseph?” She stops at the foot of the stairs. Holding tight onto the banister as she holds back tears. He’s sitting on the couch, a journal held open on his lap. 

He looks up at the sound of her voice, a smile gracing his lips immediately. 

“Rook. You’re up. Are you hungry?”

Honestly she probably should be, but she feels disgusted. She shakes her head and trudges over. Hands clenching at her sides.

“Can I sit?”

“Of course.” He scoots over, making room. 

She collapses down into him. Head resting on his shoulder. He goes stiff at the contact, a slight gasp startled out of him. 

“Rook?”

“Do you guys love me still?” 

“Wha—Rook, what’s wrong?” He cups her cheeks, forcing her head up so they’re staring at each other. It’s hard to maintain that eye contact. He’s always been so intense and now is no different. 

“You guys don’t want to touch me anymore. It’s like you’re all disgusted by me or something. And if I’m wrong then tell me, please, but if I’m not...if I’m not then I have to know because I don’t want to waste anyone’s time.”

“Christ, honey, where’d that all come from?”

Rook nearly jumps apart from Joseph. Eyes darting around until they land on Jacob. He’s standing by the front door, a frown on his lips as he regards her. 

“C’mere.” He rounds the couch and grabs her, practically lifts her up into the air. 

“Jake!” Joseph snaps, standing up, “be careful. She’s pregnant for goodness sakes.”

Jacob nods, hands resting on the sides of her stomach. “I know. But she’s been feeling a little neglected, huh?” He smiles at her, a hand moving up to cup the back of her head. 

The kiss they share is light. Too gentle than what she’s used to. 

“We don’t wanna hurt you, honey.”

“I don’t _care.”_

He laughs, pulling her as close to him as her bulging stomach will allow. He grabs her ass and kneads it, suddenly rough again. 

“Yeah, starting to realize that. Christ, come on, upstairs.” 

It’s hard to hear Joseph’s rising protests as Jacob leads them to their bedroom, but she catches bits and pieces. 

All bullshit really. His concern, all of their apparent concern, is sweet. Or it was. Now she’s starting to feel a little...distant. Not exactly unloved, that might be impossible between the three of them, but she’s nowhere near where she was before her stomach ballooned outwards. 

Now she’s focused on racing ahead of Jacob as fast as she can manage, kissing him hard as her back slams against the bedroom door. It’s loud, has the wood rattling in place as he keeps a hand on her shoulder and tips his head to the side. 

There’s a hand that slides down to grab her shirt and wrinkle the material in a scarred fist. 

And there it is. The hunger. The lust and the want he had been hiding for her own protection. He hadn't wanted to harm the baby. 

That’s stupidly adorable. Makes her kiss him with teeth. 

The door swings open behind her, nearly sends her on her ass if not for the hold Jacob has on her. 

“Oh.” It’s John. Still tucked away in their room. Not now though, now he’s more infatuated with what’s going on in front of him. “Is this what we’re doing?” She can’t see him, more focused on sliding her hands up Jacob’s shirt to feel the plane of muscles underneath, but she can hear the smile in his voice. 

John spins her around, cradling her cheeks as Jacob gets to work working her shirt away from behind. John nudges her towards the bed, laying her down carefully, a hand held behind her head with a gentleness she’s honestly starting to get sick of. 

With a groan she tips her head back, fingers curling in the sheets. She catches sight of Joseph as he makes his way inside, shutting the door behind them. He lingers there, watching as his brothers undress. 

“How do you want me?” She eventually asks when she gets too hot to watch anymore. They’re not trying to put on a show, but the mere act of them shedding their layers makes her burn. 

“Your back,” is Jacob’s immediate response, and she sees both John and Joseph nod. “So you don’t get hurt.” 

She huffs but complies. Sliding up further onto the bed as she snaps the clasp of her bra off, shrugging it off her shoulders. Joseph’s eyes dart down and she laughs, reaching a hand out for him to take. 

He practically falls on the bed. Sliding in next to her as he nuzzles into her neck. He takes one of her breasts in hand. Thumb stroking back and forth over a perky nipple. 

Her hips twitch. Jumping to find friction where there isn’t any. 

“Here, I’ve got you.” John slots himself between her legs. Spreading her knees a little wider to bracket the breadth of his shoulders. “Comfortable?”

“Just peachy.” She hooks her leg around his waist, digging her heel into his lower back to urge him forward. “Come on.” 

He laughs, but she can tell that he’s high strung. Always so needy. 

It’s been a while since they all three have done this. Years. And though she's fucked them plenty of times this feels new. Even if it’s not. Maybe it’s the added weight on her belly throwing her off, the lack of positions they can take up and the fact that Jacob can’t easily get access, that he has to touch himself at the edge of the bed instead of letting her do it for him. 

“Jacob,” she reaches out for him and he comes easily. Threading his fingers in her head to kiss her. She whimpers when Joseph pinches at a nipple, switching between her breasts until she’s wiggling to escape the sensitivity. 

She grabs Jacob’s shoulder and tugs him closer. “Lie down.”

He smiles at her, a deceptively calm thing that makes her heart race. “Nuh-uh. You stay there and let us take care of you for once.”

Rook snorts, head dropping back on Joseph’s shoulder. ‘For once,’ as if they hadn’t been doing that very thing for months. 

“Can you at least fuck my mouth?”

Between her legs John chuckles. The warmth of his brother on her exposed belly. His fingers are toying with her pants, tugging at the waistband until she lifts her hips ever so slightly and he gets the message. 

“Joe? Think you can handle that?”

She tips her head further to watch Joseph’s reaction to Jacob’s questions. His cheeks pinken so slightly, the vulgarity probably having something to do with that. 

But he nods anyway, his chest stuttering as he breathes in and moves out from behind her. 

He taps her chin softly, guiding her to keep her head to the side. He goes to stand up, undoing his jeans with a sigh. 

Her legs try to knock closed, stopped midway by John. He slaps her inner thigh and bites down on her skin. 

“Slow John,” comes Joseph’s soft command, but John just shakes his head and kisses her where she most wants to be touched. 

It’s not enough. She wants _more._

Joseph sighs and shuffles forward, tracing his cockhead along her parted lips. He’s got it in his mind that going slow is what she needs. Like too much—all of them—would be catastrophic. She disagrees. 

“Please.” She isn’t sure who she’s talking to. But all of them move at once. Joseph’s sinking into her mouth, a hand at the back of her head pushing her down, John glides his tongue up her folds and Jacob plants his mouth over her nipple and bites down until she’s arching up and groaning the best she can. 

The vibrations make Joseph groan, and his hand tightens in her hair. Her tongue swirls around. Out of practice but enthusiastic. 

Jacob pulls back and the loss of contact makes her whimper. He blows cool air on her nipple, and the sensation is something she’s missed. She wants to toss her head to the side, to kiss Jacob, but her mouth is occupied. 

And that’s when she realizes that her tongue has stopped moving and she’s sort of just sitting here letting Joseph fuck her as he pleases. She swallows around his length and slurps loudly, an apology of sorts. 

“She isn’t made of glass,” John mutters, beard no doubt slick with her juices, “go ahead and wreck her, Jacob.”

Joseph takes himself out, lets her breath properly once more as he eases away from the precipice, and she voices her want immediately. 

“Yes!” She laughs, amused and airy when she finally manages to lock eyes with Jacob. “Fuck me, please.”

“One thing at a time.” Jacob strokes her thigh. Moving around John’s head to thumb at her entrance. “Bet you’re real tight, honey, gotta stretch you out first.”

He lifts one of her legs up, tossing it over John’s shoulder. The angle makes her feel exposed and she can’t say she minds it at all. 

“Just be careful you two.”

Jacob bites his lip. “Mhm.”

She squirms at the press of Jacob’s index finger finding a home inside her. Pushing in further until he bends it up and she _keens_. The moment that ungodly noise leaves her throat John is back to using his mouth. Directing his tongue around her clit, flicking out gingerly just to draw a reaction from her. 

“I want more.”

“Greedy thing,” Jacob laughs, kissing her knee still bent over the stretch of John’s body. But they give her what she wants, Joseph pushes his cock back inside her mouth, until she chokes on it and tears creep out of the corners of her eyes. 

Jacob adds another finger. Pumps them in and out at a pace so very different to John’s hasty licking. Like he’s actually trying to eat her. Just as enthusiastic as her then. 

Joseph is holding back. Going slow and controlling how much she takes just so he doesn’t cum so soon. But that’s the damn point of this so she redoubled her efforts.

A third finger is added. Pyramided inside her cunt and Jacob had been right—it is a tight fit. It’s too much, and she knows now that she’d never be able to take any of their cocks right now. Jacob’s finger and John’s mouth is enough to drag her crashing to the edge until she has to hold herself back from clamping her teeth down around Joseph’s dick. 

Joseph finishes off in a few quick pumps. Leaning down to kiss her with a smile, teeth clacking messily together. 

He must taste himself on her and he doesn’t seem to care in the slightest. The thought and the combined stimulation of John’s tongue swirling around has her whimpering. 

“You didn’t—“ her eyes daft to John then Jacob, “neither of you finished.”

“Another time,” Jacob promises. Cock still standing hard between his thighs. She’s not sure if John agrees, or maybe he did cum, cock pressed between the blankets and rutting against it. 

Another time. But she still pouts. Eyes drifting closed. 

“You’re perfect, you know?” Joseph says after a while, a hand laying on her stomach. “Meant for us just as God intended.”

She hums. Too sleepy to talk. 

He laughs, a soft thing that is music to her ears. “Rest, my darling Rook, you’ve earned it.”


	56. Preaching

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Joseph preaches in a former slaughterhouse with only Jacob and John to listen. Pre-Eden’s Gate

It smells like blood and death, but that’s to be expected. Joseph had mentioned this being an old slaughterhouse before he dragged them out here. Someplace long abandoned by the people of Rome and so it’s up for grabs. But John’s starting to wonder if he should’ve tried a little harder to convince Joseph to let him rent a hall or something. Someplace more inviting. 

But Joseph had adamantly refused, said something about John being far to kind already. That he’s done more than enough for now. Even if John doesn’t feel the same—he just did what had been right. Provided clothes and shelter and food for his brothers when they couldn’t do it themselves. 

The least he could do is get Eden’s Gate off the ground like Joseph prophesied. Because this place? It won’t work, it can’t be a permanent option even with Joseph continuing to say that this slaughterhouse is better than preaching under the unforgiving Georgian sun. 

Not like it makes much of a difference. They may be inside, but the metal walls are meant to insulate and it’s fucking hot. Even with the door open and the fan going in the corner. 

John’s listening, he is, but it’s hard. He’s sweating in places he normally doesn’t unless he goes to the gym, he’s hungry and the sound of Joseph’s voice echoing off the walls is starting to grate on his nerves. 

John hasn’t seen his brothers in years, they’ve only been together for three weeks, but John can tell that Joseph isn’t nervous—he’s excited to preach. 

Even if it’s only them three here. 

There are enough chairs for a whole army of people though. It had been a team effort loading them out of the car and setting them up. John had to bite his tongue to keep from making some sort of comment—there’s no one  _ here.  _ No one even knows about Eden’s Gate. 

But Joseph is excited and Jacob’s finally out of bed and he even showered today, so John can do this. He’s been through worse, he can spend an hour in this slaughterhouse turned temporary church.

“Should I have brought snacks?” Joseph suddenly asks as he’s putting down tiny water bottles on the folding tables Jacob had set up when they first got here. 

“I can order pizza?” 

Jacob snorts and falls down in the nearest chair, the indignant sound makes John’s cheeks heat up all the way to his ears. 

“Sorry, yeah, stupid idea.” He swallows hard and it’s loud in the sudden quiet—with his brothers’ attention on him now. 

“Not at all, John,” Joseph soothes, a gentle smile on his lips. “But I’m afraid hot food would go to waste, we’re not sure when anyone will show up.” He runs his hand across the dirty surface of the table, brushing along the front of a stack of pamphlets for Eden’s Gate. 

“You did go to town the other day, didn’t you? To hand them out?” 

“Yes, Joseph.”

He nods and picks one up, truly examining it for the first time. 

John had made them on his lunch break the other day. If anyone were to show up they’d go home with something more tangible than just the memory of their brother in low rise jeans that barely fit and the scars he insists on displaying. 

That had been a fight right off the bat. One John tries to push out of his head because  _ they shouldn’t be fighting,  _ they just found each other and he wants to spend each minute loving his brothers. But the idea of complete strangers seeing the pain they went through makes John squeamish. 

But Joseph said it had to be done. That John and Jacob can leave if they want but Joseph is keeping his shirt off. It’d get the message across more effectively to newcomers. 

And at this point anyone who walks through those doors are newcomers because him and his brothers are the only ones in Eden’s Gate at the moment. 

Joseph doesn’t seem to mind. He preaches like the number of people in front of him isn’t important at all. 

“Brothers, have found you was a blessing I never thought God would grant me.” He spreads his arms out, as if reaching for both of them. “I searched for so long, and He has brought you to me for a very important task. He has seen fit to give us a mission in His name.” Joseph pauses, probably for dramatic effect, and John leans forward to lock eyes with him. To prove he's listening. “We’re going to save people. As many as we can.”

“It won’t be easy, the good things in life never are, but I’m confident we can do it together. I’ve seen it. We’ll prevail, and we’ll start here, in our hometown.”

Jacob sighs beside him, slumping further in his seat. John will have to talk to him later, he knows that Jacob doesn’t want to stay here. He hates these old streets to his very core. 

“The world won’t last forever—not with the direction the human race is headed in. God will cleanse the world in fire and only a select few will survive. We are lucky to be chosen by Him. We’ll show our thanks in due time, but first we must tell the masses and let them see. They’ll decide if they want to listen and be saved.”

It takes an...embarrassing amount of time for someone to show up. They’re still in the slaughterhouse, figured they could make it into something more homey with time. Perhaps it hadn’t been what people had expected when John spoke so adamantly of Eden’s Gate at the corner store, but they didn’t turn their nose up as they walked in, so that’s a start. 

It was laughably easy to gather a reputation in Rome after that first group showed their faces. Joseph is...enigmatic. Enchanting. He’s in his natural element and everyone can see that. People want to come see it in person. 

John couldn’t be any more proud of his brother than he is now. If he could he’d capture that emotion, lock it up tight to preserve the happiness and joy that lights Joseph up from the inside out. 

It won’t last forever, nothing ever does. But that’s okay, John will be there by his brothers’ side until the very end.


	57. Obsessive (pt 2)

The drive up to their ranch is a long one, though that’s partly her fault for stopping along the path to check out a beautiful little greenhouse. It looks like they’re growing herbs, parsley and basil, some mint that she plucks from its stem to smell and tuck away into her pocket. 

When she does reach the front doors she hesitates a little while longer, waits until the time on the dash lights up at 6:00. She’s stupidly nervous, holding a small bottle of wine and a covered baked alaska. Some sort of peace offering, so to speak.

John greets her at the door, swinging it open before she even has a chance to knock. He looks just as clean as he had the last time she saw him, slicked back hair and a neatly trimmed beard. His clothes are a little more formal than her own, and she suddenly feels underdressed in her leggings and plain t-shirt.

He still reaches out to touch her arm and says that she “looks wonderful,” coaxing her inside with just barely enough room for her to slip past. Her elbow brushes his stomach from the proximity and she gets more than her fair share of his cologne sent her way. Which isn’t entirely unwelcome, he smells heavenly. 

“I hope I haven't held dinner up.” She turns on her heel to face him as he closes the door.

“Not at all, my dear.” His laugh is warm and inviting, has her swaying on her feet slightly. “What’s that?” His eyes veer downward, towards the food and drink in her arms.

“Gifts.”

He smiles, but it’s tight. “Gotcha.”

Oh that’s not...no that hadn’t been the response she had been hoping for.

“You don’t have to eat it—“

“It’s not the food,” a different voice cuts her off and she flinches, arms almost giving out. She glances over her shoulder and sees Joseph, a light smile on his lips. “The wine, we don’t drink alcohol, it’s…” he tips his head down in consideration, staring at John before his brother picks up the conversation once more. 

“I’m in recovery. Haven’t had a drink in about six years now.”

Her jaw goes a little slack. “Oh.” She swallows nervously and looks down at her offering. “I-I’m sorry, I’ll just go put it in the car.”

But Joseph just waves his hand, “don’t bother. Let’s go take a seat.”

Rook nods and trails along behind Joseph, handing off her and the wine with a regretful look. “I really am sorry,” she repeats. This hadn't been the impression she had wanted to make.

“You didn’t know.” John comes up behind her and lays a hand on her shoulder, smiling benignly. “Sit, please, let us serve you. You are our guest after all.”

She picks a chair at random, sliding in and grabbing the napkin in front of her to lay across her lap. For a few minutes there’s only the sound of cutlery being placed around the table and the idle chatter Joseph and John pass between each other as they work at finishing up the last of the meals.

“I can help?”

“Nonsense,” John sets down a steaming crockpot she tries to take a peak in, “are you always this ill at ease?”

She jumps, “Oh! No, no I didn’t mean--”

“Joking.”

Rook breathes deeply through her nose. She’s suddenly unsure whether or not she’s going to survive the night. Staci was right, this was a bad idea, they’re going to hate her. 

“Leave her be, John, how about you go and get the rest of the family.”

John leaves without complaint and she has a feeling that this is an old argument, or that he’s just...always like that...with everyone.

“I apologize about him, he’s only excited. We all are, new friends are hard to come by. I think we’re still seen as strangers to everyone.”

Rook dips her head, lips twisting in consideration. “People are just worried you’ll disrupt their lives...your church is spreading out and I guess some don’t want your religion rammed down their throats.” She glances up and sees him staring at her. “Or, um, that’s just my best guess. I dunno.”

Joseph hums and turns back to the stove. They sit in silence until his siblings come walking in, John at the lead. She recognizes Jacob right away, but not the young woman at his heels.

She introduces herself as Faith, and Rook has to bite her tongue to stop herself from saying that she already knows her name—they’ve all got their own personal files down at the station. Detailing their past as far back as they’re able to track it. 

Rook doesn’t want to give into the rumors hanging over the Seeds’ head, but the fact that Faith looks nothing at all like her brothers makes her think that what people are saying is true. She’s not related to them at all. With brown eyes and black eyes, short too with a plumpish frame that makes her look soft. 

She keeps her thoughts to herself. It’s best that way. Whitehorse doesn’t want to rock the boat too much, which makes perfect sense. 

Dinner is...not bad at all. They’re nice company, very good conversationalists too. Their speech hardly ever wanes, unless they’re waiting for a response from her and she’s busy jamming food past her lips because surprisingly Joseph knows how to cook. 

“May I ask where the rest of your family is, Rook,” Joseph inquires eventually, “are they in Hope with us?”

“Oh, no. No, they’re in California. Alive and well.”

“You don’t miss them?” 

She shrugs and gives a lopsided grin. “I do. But I had to leave home sometime, and I didn’t want to stay in Cali forever.” She tries to push on their personal life but doesn’t get much of anything. It seems like Joseph and Faith want to say more than they do, but she catches the way John bites his lip and how Jacob is grinding his teeth with fists clenched tight around his fork. 

She drops it. Unspoken apologies shining in her eyes. 

It’s way past when she normally goes to bed when she realizes how late it is. They’ve relocated to the living room and she’s curled up on the couch, legs pulled up to her chest as she rests her head on her bent knees. Eyes fluttering open and closed as she tries to focus. 

Jacob cups a large hand around her calf from where he’s sat beside her. “You can take the guest bedroom ya know.”

“Shouldn’t.” She yawns and stretches out, hearing him give a soft snort at the sight she makes. “I’ve got work in the morning.”

Joseph sees her out, thanks her for coming and apologizes for keeping her for so late. Not like she minds, they’re good people. 

*****

She isn’t celebrating anything specific, so she shouldn’t be drinking as much as she is, but maybe it’s just the thrill of being alive that pushes her inside the tiny bad right before she decides to head back to her hotel. 

Her cousin is waiting for her back at their room, they’ve got plans in a few hours for dinner and she has time to relax. Which is almost unheard of for her—being out of Hope county helps, no familiar faces to bother her while she’s out. 

Except that’s what she had thought, three beers in and pressing up close to the bar when a hand lays on her elbow and she nearly yelps. 

It’s John. 

There’s the momentary surprise is seeing someone she knows three towns over, but then something else kicks in—he doesn’t drink. He’s a recovering addict. 

He’s drunk. 

She smells it on his breath when he leans in closer and murmurs a greeting. He’s got a loose smile on his lips and his hands are floating south where they settle low on her hips. 

“John…” she forces her own grin and places her hand over his, trying to pry them away. It doesn’t work, his nails sink in and he laughs. 

“I thought it was you, deputy,” he slurs his words and shuffles in closer when someone knocks into him. He doesn’t seem to mind, which goes to show how bad off he is. “What’re you doing in town?”

“Visiting family.” She cocks her head to the side curiously, “what about you, John? Is Jacob here? Joseph?”  _ Anyone that can get you out of here before you make things worse. _

“Business. I had a meeting to attend.” He sighs and reaches out to grab her half filled glass. Taking it to his own lips to chug from. He drains the glass and slams it down on the counter. 

“Your siblings—are they with you?” she presses again. 

“Mm, no. What fun would that be?” 

He takes her hand and suddenly drags her forward. “Let’s sit. Talk a little.” They slide into a booth and now Rook is trapped. She can’t just leave him here. If what he said at dinner was true then he’s going to hate himself when he gets sober. 

“John—“

“Did Joseph tell you why we invited you to our house?”

“I...no. He didn’t.” She peers at him as he scoots closer, their thighs pressing together in a way she can only describe as intimate. 

“He said I have to wait for you to reach our first, you need to extend the hand and only then may we take what has been so graciously offered to us.” 

His hand grabs hers, squeezing painfully tight while the other goes to cradle her jaw. 

“Thought so...I love my brother and I respect what he says but sometimes,” he cuts himself off with a gruff chuckle, “I suppose that’s my greed, hm? I can’t wait, Rook, it’s too much.”

“John—“

“Shhh.” He pushes his finger to her lips, still holding onto her hand. Her fingers feel numb. “Please…”

“You’re not making sense.” 

He shakes his head like he doesn’t understand. Struggling for words until finally they come to him. 

“I’m sorry, I know this is sinful, to push you forward but I’m so  _ broken. _ ”

He leans against her, head tucking into the crook of her neck. Rook hesitantly reaches up and pets his hair, very much aware of the scene they must make if anyone were to look over at them. 

She casts her eyes around for that reason exactly and sees a hulk of a man shove through the crowd to get to them. It takes only a second for her brain to supply that it’s  _ Jacob  _ of all people, and she’s never been more happy to see him. 

Christ, maybe there is a god. 

Jacob doesn’t say ‘hello,’ doesn’t even talk to his brother, simply grabs the back of his shirt collar and manhandles him away from her. 

He squawks, hands swinging like he’d be able to throw a punch in his state, before Jacob growls out something she can’t hear and he stops his flailing. 

“I—Jake—“

“Apologize.”

John hunches over himself, glancing over at her as his bottom lip trembles. Oh. No, she doesn’t like that look at all. She rushes to stand. 

“It’s fine, really, he didn’t mean any harm.” She hesitates before continuing, “I’m more worried about him, to be honest.”

Jacob seems to read between the lines and nods. Lips thinning out into a grim line. 

“You getting out of here? Need a ride?”

John seems to perk up at Jacob’s question and from that look alone she knows she can’t refuse. She has somewhere to be tonight technically—but it’s the Seeds—they are her friends. Her cousin will understand. Hopefully. 

“Yeah, yeah, if you don’t mind?”

“Course not, c’mon.”

They pack John away into the back seat, ignoring his soft mumbling words that are bound to turn into tears when he sobers up a little and realizes what happens. At least that’s what Jacob tells her. 

Not his first relapse than. 

“It’s been a while though, he wasn’t lying about being clean for so long.”

She nods. Folds her hand into her lap. She’s in no place to judge. 

Jacob doesn’t need help getting John to the front door when they arrive at their ranch, but she gets out anyway. Following along timidly. 

She stands back when Joseph runs out, hugging Jacob the best he can before moving onto John. He mumbles something into John’s ear, brows furrowed with brotherly concern that makes her heart ache. 

Then he sees her. 

“Rook!” He goes to step forward but pauses, makes sure Jacob has their little brother handled—he does and waves Joseph away. Then Joseph is taking her hands and sighing deeply. “Thank you for being there. You’re truly amazing.”

“Oh, no, I mean I didn’t really do anything—“

“Perhaps you don’t see it that way but I assure you that you being there wasn’t chance.”

Rook’s eyes narrow ever so slightly, lips pursing. That’s...a weird thing to say. He’s a preacher though, so she doesn’t read into it too much. 

“Come to my service tomorrow, please, it’d be an honor to host Hope county’s finest.”

She considers for a long while—she really does. The only reason to refuse is her reputation, her supposed responsibility to protect the citizens of this county from a threat they made up. 

Rook can’t say no, really she can’t. She doesn’t have it in her when Joseph is smiling at her so sweetly and she still feels the ghost of John’s hands on her. She still hears his strange words in her ear. 

She’s meant to say yes. 

And so she does.


End file.
